Chapter 23: Streaming Struggles: The Awakening of a New Self

The day after Yoo Ji-eun had dinner with Song Chae-hyun, the webcam, microphone, and lighting were delivered.

I opened the package and finished setting everything up, searching through various things as I went.

What appeared was a clear image.

It supported QHD resolution and 60 frames per second.

Perhaps that’s why it felt sharp and smooth without any stuttering.

“Ah.”

As I said that, a very pleasant voice came through my headset.

I quickly changed into a shirt and skirt.

They weren’t the clothes that Yoo Ji-eun bought, but the ones that Song Chae-hyun had purchased.

— “Ji-eun, can I not wear the clothes you gave me even during the broadcast…? I don’t know how to explain it…”

“Okay. If it feels burdensome, you don’t have to wear it.”

As she said this, she added,

— “But from now on, you should call me ‘Unni.’”

— “Huh…? Okay… Ji-eun Unni.”

At that, she chuckled softly, appearing satisfied.

It wasn’t a difficult request, so I acknowledged it.

Now, I didn’t feel averse to the term “Unni” itself anymore.

But it was unexpected. I thought she would adamantly refuse, but she was complying so readily.

Her tone on the call felt less domineering this time; I wondered if her mindset had changed.

She had still insisted I send her selfies, though.

Anyway, if that’s the case, it’s a good sign.

I was also beginning to like Yoo Ji-eun and not be afraid of her.

If she had treated me to expensive meals twice and bought me nice clothes but still wanted to avoid me, that would take someone with a lot of nerve.

…

But she seemed like a good person, so why was she telling me to avoid Song Chae-hyun?

So, I asked her next.

— “Is Chae-hyun Unni not good?”

— “Um, it’s just… I don’t really like her. Anyway, don’t meet her… or, do as you wish, I suppose.”

Again, she set aside her opinion.

But no matter how much I thought about it, I couldn’t come up with a reason for Yoo Ji-eun to dislike Song Chae-hyun.

In fact, they seemed to have enjoyed each other’s company, didn’t they?

Now that I think about it, Song Chae-hyun had said something similar about not getting too close to Yoo Ji-eun.

So, when I called Song Chae-hyun, I asked the same thing.

— “Why? Do you dislike Ji-eun Unni?”

— “Um, it’s just… it’s just like that. It’s an intuition, I guess? Hahaha…”

She mumbled like Yoo Ji-eun.

What’s going on?

I’ll have to ask later.

Anyway, it’s about time to start the broadcast.

With a more fluttering heart than usual, I pressed the broadcast button.

‘The high school graduate, unemployed, and a virgin girl has started her stream.’

Right away, chat messages began to slowly pop up.

ᄒᄋVirgin girl.

I stayed silent for a while, staring at the chat window.

I was waiting for the kind of chat I had been hoping for.

…

But.

What’s going on? Why is no one talking?

Did I forget to take my meds or something?

No one acknowledges me.

…

Ah, do I have to say this myself?

It’s humiliating to do that.

When things didn’t go as well as I had imagined, I felt a bit down.

So, I decided to phrase it a bit differently.

“Has anything changed?”

I ended up speaking in a slightly sulky tone.

Uh-oh.

Ah, so even a girl who’s a recluse can say things like that?

ᄅᄋ Is this a girl trait?

Slowly, my mood began to worsen.

ᄋᄋ donated 1,000 won.

“You look pretty today ^^”

“Thank you. But that’s not it.”

ᄏᄏ If it’s not that, then what is it?Emergency

However, several minutes passed without anyone guessing correctly.

No, it shouldn’t be that hard, right?

The difference between the lighting, webcam, and microphone is huge…

Someone guessed the microphone, but no one acknowledged the lighting and webcam, which I really wanted them to notice.

I ended up bringing my phone into view of the camera and kept turning it on and off.

I kept glancing at the chat window.

Come on, I’m giving you all these hints.

Originally, it was a phone webcam, right? But how could I hold the phone?

Still, no one acknowledged it.

My mood was sinking.

“I want to end the stream.”

At that, the chat exploded.

” ᄏᄏWhat?”

” ᄏᄏAt least give us a hint!”

” ᄏᄏWhat is this girl doing? So funny.”

” ᄏᄏDo pretty girls all act on the same orders or something?”

I turned my head and pretended to be sulking, but I couldn’t help but sneak a glance at the comments.

Then, at that moment, amidst the countless forced guesses, a chat came in.

“ᄍᄍ You changed your webcam and got new lighting, right, you virgin loser? ”

“…!!”

My expression brightened instantly.

What?

Why are they suddenly like this?

What’s the correct answer?

“One person got it right. I changed my webcam and lighting.”

…

Should I ask if the person who guessed wants to be a manager?

I thought about saying that, but I held back because I felt like Yoo Ji-eun would really get mad if I just gave it away.

As I said that, people finally started to notice.

“Oh, yeah.”

“ᄅᄋ You look a bit prettier.”

It’s too late.

“Ugh, whatever. Virgin losers wouldn’t know this kind of stuff anyway.”

I grumbled for no reason.

I wanted to make them hurt as much as possible.

“ᄏᄏYou’re a virgin loser too.”

“ᄏᄏStupid girl.”

“ᄏᄏAre virgin losers really insulting each other? ”

Seeing the flood of rebuttals, I laughed scornfully.

Are these guys idiots?

“Are you all stupid?”

?

??

“Do you really think the value of female virgins and male virgins is the same?”

I spat out that scornful remark.

Ah.

Ah…

“ᄏᄏ That’s true, but damn.”

At that moment, as I watched the chats that couldn’t respond, I felt a sense of victory.

“ᄏᄏThen let’s swap virgins, you b*tch.”

A crossing-the-line comment.

Whenever there’s even a hint of something sexual, it always pops up.

So I usually avoid these topics, but this time I wanted to give them a hard time.

I furrowed my brow and hovered my mouse cursor over that nickname.

The nickname is so nasty too.

But then…

“Grandpa’s Jar Smashing” has been forcibly removed.

“Oh?”

Before I could kick them, someone had already banned them.

Who was it?

Was it Yoo Ji-eun?

As I wondered, a chat from a user with a manager icon popped up.

“dlgusdl123: Watch your words.”

“dlgusdl123: You piece of sh*t.”

Oh, it’s Song Chae-hyun.

I had given her manager privileges before.

ᄃᄃᄃWhat’s this? Her tone sounds so boyfriend-like.

ᄃᄃᄃThat’s really a boyfriend. Ah, the virgin girl.

“Ugh…”

Once again, the chat was going wild.

I sighed and considered sending a Kakao message to ask if I could call Song Chae-hyun.

Oh, she’s watching.

“Um, unnie, could you just let your voice be heard? They’re a bit sensitive about this stuff…”

I felt a little guilty and spoke cautiously.

Then, the phone rang immediately.

I answered while switching to speakerphone.

“… Hello?”

“[Ah, hello?]”

After that, Song Chae-hyun spoke unilaterally.

“[Hey. You guys are really crossing the line.]”

“[Hey. It’s fine to say you’re pretty and cute, but if you do something like that sexual harassment, I’ll really kill you.]”

“Hik…”

It’s scary.

Hearing such words from someone who usually only had a kind voice is genuinely frightening.

It was already pretty scary then too.

Was the chat the same?

“ᅲᅲWhat? ᄉᄇ So scary.”

“ᅲᅲOh, it reminds me of school days… I want to leave. ”

“ᄃᄃVirgin certificate ‘renewal.’”

“ᄅᄋIsn’t that  a blonde with a broken iPhone tattoo and a cigarette?”

But then, noticing that I was scared, Song Chae-hyun hurriedly said in a flustered tone.

“[W-were you scared, Lee Hyun? I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to curse…]”

After calming down Song Chae-hyun, who continued to apologize, I ended the call.

But thinking about it, I felt a sense of reassurance.

“You all heard that, right? If you say bad things to me, you’ll get in trouble now.”

I teased a bit.

Because of that, the sexual harassment in the chat noticeably decreased today.

Even the little that remained got immediately banned by Song Chae-hyun.

Deep into the game,

finally, the opponent’s Nexus was destroyed.

“Carry.”

I smiled and pressed the forced exit button.

This way, I could get to the next game faster.

But then, I felt a stiffness in my lower back.

I leaned back against the chair for a moment.

“Ah, playing for a long time is making me hurt…”

I felt like my overall physical condition had declined compared to before.

In the past, I needed to game for 12 hours straight to feel even a little stiff, but now just three hours left my shoulders tight and my back sore.

The last time I climbed a hill, I was surprisingly tired much sooner than I expected.

As I said this, the speed of the chat increased.

“Get some exercise.”

“What? You’ve barely played for two hours, and you’re already sore?”

“ᄅᄋAre you even a teenager?”

“Virgin beauty ᄃᄃ”

It wasn’t long before that last comment received a temporary block.

Nice job, Chae-hyun unnie.

But then, suddenly, a donation came in.

“The Waist Fairy” donated 1,000 won.

“ᄅᄋBut  Do you even exercise? Your posture is really bad.”

“Exercise?”

Not really.

Until a few months ago, I did some bodyweight exercises as a hobby, but these days, I really don’t.

But wouldn’t I still be able to do well?

Even if my gender changed, wouldn’t my physical abilities remain the same?

I’ve only lost a bit of stamina.

I don’t really remember how my face used to look…

But anyway, that’s how it feels.

I feel like I could easily do about 25 push-ups.

“I can do exercise well.”

I said it as if it were obvious.

Then, question marks and laughs began to flood in.

ᄅᄋ?
ᄏᄏ??

“What?”

I felt a bit of my pride hurt at that.

“I’m not strong, but I’m confident in my muscle strength.”

As I spoke, I rolled up my left arm… No, I almost made a mistake. I flexed my right arm.

Look, my muscles are quite bulging, aren’t they?

ᄅᄋ How cute.
So cute ᄏᄏᄏ
ᄅᄋYou look really soft.

ᄅᄋIsn’t this quite voluminous?

But it’s too easy to dismiss it as just jealousy, as the very last chat was from dlgusdl123, which is Song Chae-hyun’s username.

“3대390” donated 5,000 won.

“ᄏᄏ If you do even 10 push-ups, I’ll give you 500,000 won, seriously.”

“Ugh.”

That made me laugh out loud.

What do they think I am?

I used to easily do up to 30.

10 push-ups?

No matter how much I’ve become a woman, there’s a limit to what I can do.

I rolled my shoulders and said solemnly.

“You have to give it to me.”

“Ugh… Wait a moment. Again…”

I took a deep breath for a moment.

Something must be wrong with my posture.

I repositioned myself, went down again, and then…

“Ugh… Huuuh…!!”

I strained my back and struggled to push up, trembling.

But then, flop.

I collapsed.

I stared blankly to the side in that state.

What?

I can’t do a single one?

Really?

I can’t do a single push-up?

“No… This doesn’t make sense…”

I muttered in a daze while looking at the chat.

It was already a boiling cauldron of excitement and frenzy.

“Wow ᄏᄏᄏ”
“ᄏᄏᄏYou’re really weak.”
“ᄏᄏᄏExactly the average female shrimp.”

“You. Have. To. Give. It. To. Me.” (While dramatically rolling my shoulders)

I felt genuinely hurt by those chats.

“What, what? This is the average for women. I’m not weak. You can do a few push-ups because you’re men. No, can’t you guys do even one? If that’s the case, you’re getting a lower push-up count than me due to female quotas.”

While I was muttering words I didn’t even understand,

“I Hyun, I can’t let this happen. You need to exercise with me. For real.”

I saw Song Chae-hyun’s message in the chat.

“Exercise together? But I hate exercising…”

I originally didn’t dislike it much, but just now, I really started to hate it.

It’s hard. It’s inhumane to be this hard.

But Song Chae-hyun’s chat kept coming up.

“No. Your posture while gaming is like that. You really have to do it.”

The fact that Song Chae-hyun is telling me this means she’s really serious about it.

Then, something suddenly came to mind.

When we first met a few days ago.

When she wore tight-fitting training clothes, I could see the outline of her strong leg muscles and the abs between her tank top and jacket.

I know enough that you can’t get to that level with just regular training.

There’s no way my weak body could keep up with her workouts.

I would definitely die.

I trembled in fear and said,

“I… don’t want to…”

But my will was not respected.

A few days later, I found myself blankly watching Song Chae-hyun, who was dressed in workout clothes and doing warm-ups from behind.