Bittersweet Feelings

Beatrix, who was faintly frowning, replied calmly.
“His face is quite handsome.”
At the unexpected answer, Gwendolyn momentarily held her breath before bursting into laughter.
“Are you serious?”
“Of course. Selene wouldn’t be interested in a man unless he was at least that handsome, would she?”
Anyone else would have thought it was a joke, but Gwendolyn knew that Beatrix was being completely serious right now.
And that she wanted Selene to meet a man and start a family more than anyone.
“Isn’t it more important for Mr. Cox to genuinely love the young lady, rather than for the young lady to be interested in a man?”
Theron Cox had approached her for money.
That was, no matter what, the biggest problem.
“Ha. You ask a funny question, Gwendolyn. What man wouldn’t like Selene? She’s such a pretty child.”
Beatrix clicked her tongue rarely, as if she had heard something absurd.
At that doting display, Gwendolyn thought that her love for her granddaughter was truly unstoppable.
“So, of course, it doesn’t really matter whether Theron Cox is sincere to Selene or not. What’s important is that Selene, who spends all her days clinging to the piano, shows even a little interest in a man. It’s a bit of a problem that he approached her for money, but men are mostly the same anyway.”
“I can’t agree with the statement that men are mostly the same. The late Duke and Lord Nicholas were both wonderful people.”
At Gwendolyn’s reply, Beatrix momentarily held her breath.
Then, with distant eyes, she looked out the window.
At that sight, Gwendolyn wondered if she had said something she shouldn’t have, but she didn’t want to forcefully exclude them, pushed by sadness.
Because those two were proud Ashcombes who had left behind great achievements that should be talked about for a long time.
Both Beatrix’s husband, the previous Duke, and her second son, Nicholas.
With the wealth and honor they had in their lifetime, they had bestowed love and devotion on many people in the world.
“…That’s why I hate him even more, Gwen.”
Beatrix said, as if muttering, while looking out the window.
Despite her hushed energy, her eyes were filled with a faint resentment and sadness.
Gwendolyn knew, without having to ask, that there was only one person Beatrix would speak of with such eyes.
Orlando Ashcombe.
Her only remaining son now.
“What could have made him so anxious, so blinded by envy?”
“…”
“So much so that he would not only make his brother into that state but also try to make his niece a divorcee.”
As if to contain her heavy heart, the clear sky was tinged with dark clouds.
Gwendolyn looked at Beatrix, who had confined herself in this villa, with a pitying heart.
“So, Gwen. I must have Selene’s biological child inherit the ducal title.”
“Yes, I know.”
“For that, Selene must meet a suitable man and get married. In fact, as long as she has a child, it doesn’t matter if she throws the man away or gets rid of him.”
‘Throws him away…’
Beatrix, in her speech and thoughts, had a side that was exactly like her indifferent granddaughter.
But there were definitely different parts too.
“You don’t like a marriage without love, madam.”
Even in a much more conservative era, Beatrix had married her husband after a period of courtship.
That was a very radical thing at the time, and just from that, one could get a glimpse of her beliefs.
Beatrix delayed her answer for a moment, as if she had many thoughts on Gwendolyn’s point.
“Yes, if possible, it would be best if Selene met a man she was head over heels in love with and lived happily ever after. But not everything goes my way just because I want it to.”
“…”
“Just look at my child not going my way.”
Beatrix calmly lowered her aged eyes.
“It would have been perfect if Selene had fallen in love with Logan Pembroke and married him, but Selene didn’t even acknowledge his feelings.”
“That’s just like the young lady.”
Gwendolyn chuckled, recalling Selene’s ex-fiancé, who must have been agonizing all by himself.
Logan Pembroke, he was a perfectly fine man, except for the fact that Lady Selene didn’t like him at all.
Things like the great family of a grand duke, and his handsome appearance.
But Beatrix spoke heartlessly, as if she had already erased Logan from the list of candidates.
“In the end, what matters is how that man, Theron Cox, acts from now on. For Selene, and for the Ashcombe ducal family.”
“Yes, I will watch him carefully.”
Gwendolyn answered as if it were not a difficult task, but inwardly she had to gauge whether Selene would really choose Theron over her piano studies abroad.
It was certainly different from how she had treated men so far, but it didn’t look like Selene was in love.
‘Should I watch a little longer?’
Gwendolyn, hoping that Selene’s future would be bright no matter how things turned out, put lemon and sugar in her own black tea.
At the same time, her eyes met Beatrix’s.
“Shall I put some in for you?”
As Gwendolyn asked with a smile, Beatrix silently nodded.
“That would be nice.”

Ding.
Selene, who had taken off her gloves and placed one finger on the piano key, gently pressed down, and a clear sound echoed through the piano room.
It was a sound that suited the deepening autumn.
In particular, the ‘D’ note of this piano had a clear yet calm resonance, which for some reason reminded her of the high, vermilion autumn sky.
Selene warmed up her hands with simple stretches and scales and began her serious practice.
With her fingers moving quickly and sharply along the sheet music, the early morning piano room was soon filled with a rich sound.
The Age of Love and Romance.
Selene, who had now memorized this piece, had reached the stage of thinking more deeply about how to express this piece wonderfully.
Selene recalled the content of the original sonnet.
The poor husband who worked himself to the bone to make his wife happy, and the wife who, even as she was dying, couldn’t say a word for fear of worrying her husband.
Strangely, Theron Cox came to mind.
Unlike her, he seemed to have lived a fierce life from a young age.
So, would Theron be able to understand this husband’s feelings a little?
Although he was a man who usually smiled gracefully and acted with dignity, as if to hide that past, the rough side that occasionally popped out was certainly different from the men of noble birth.
However, the thought of Theron Cox’s life did not last long.
Because the image of Theron Cox, smiling in his neat attire, disappeared, and the image of him kissing her shin and looking up at her gently bloomed in her mind.
The hot passion lingering in his blue eyes, his hazy gaze, his quickening breath.
Just tracing that lewd moment made a light heat gather in her stomach, and naturally, her playing gained strength.
Following her forceful fingers, the notes swelled in her head, and the overflowing sound went beyond the keyboard and filled the room.
Had she been so immersed in her playing for that long? When she came to her senses and stopped, Selene noticed that there were beads of sweat on her forehead.
‘It’s rare for me to sweat in such a short time.’
Selene took out a handkerchief and wiped her forehead.
Then, when she casually turned her gaze, she found Gwendolyn standing in the open doorway.
“…How long have you been there?”
“For about 10 minutes. Thanks to you, I was able to listen to a wonderful performance.”
Gwendolyn, who was smiling with satisfaction, stepped into the piano room.
As the excitement of the performance that lingered in her chest subsided, Selene opened her mouth.
“Was the performance okay?”
“Of course. It’s getting better day by day. At this rate, winning the international competition is a sure thing.”
At the future that made her heart swell just by imagining it, a gentle curve was drawn on Selene’s lips.
Gwendolyn was the type to say positive things about everything, but when it came to the piano, she was quite serious with her advice, so it probably wasn’t an empty statement.
Seeing the blushing Selene, like a girl who had received a love confession, Gwendolyn chuckled.
“And today, the venue for the competition has been decided.”
“Where?”
“It’s lucky. They say it will be held in the Gravanian Empire.”
If it was held in the Empire, it was very good news for Selene.
It wasn’t for nothing that they said home ground was advantageous.
It meant she could participate in the competition while adjusting her condition in her own country, without having to adapt to a strange climate or environment.
“Are you that happy?”
Gwendolyn asked as a faint smile and vitality bloomed on Selene’s usually doll-like, expressionless face.
“Yes.”
It was of course a happy occasion.
Hadn’t she even slept with a man recently to win that competition?
That was probably one of the most radical decisions in Selene’s life.
So much so that putting in an application to a foreign university without her grandmother’s permission would be considered the second.
Selene once again lightly reminisced about that day.