Karvan’s Realization

I was curious about your determined eyes, so I gave you the command.
I was planning to let go and watch from behind to see what you would do.
But my eyes turned at the sight of you imprinting on another male.

The imprint of a Destroyer.

It was disgusting to see what you called a stigma, which was also imprinted on another male.

The feeling of the leash that bound me to you loosening.
The feeling that I was the only one holding onto your hand.

“I can remove it! I did it for the sake of the operation.”

You noticed my anger and earnestly tried to soothe me.

You explained that the act you called a ‘stigma’ was different from the Varg’s imprint and was not sexual.

‘Then, did that mean you had no sexual feelings for me either.’

‘You did it without any feelings, just because you wanted my power.’

It wasn’t something I hadn’t expected, but hearing it directly from your mouth made my head spin.

“Is there anyone who would like to go with me!”

I was just standing there, unable to properly hear your chattering words, and then you were wagging your tail at the Sura again.

The Sura hesitated, watching my expression, and you made such a pitiful face that they were swept away and followed you as if possessed.
Looking at you, you’re not a human, but a fox with nine tails.

“I’ll go.”

Forgetting my resolve to just watch from behind, I scooped you up and went straight to the Igra’s nest.
‘If I send you alone, you might come back with another male.’

The nest is completely dark because the Sura have destroyed the watchtowers.
‘I won’t let the Igra or the Nemea lay a single hand on you,’ but you’re so anxious that you’re making a fuss.

“Shh, shh! Be quiet! We can’t get caught!”

I had reassured you that I would break their limbs if we were caught, but you couldn’t take your eyes off the Igra.

So I impulsively stole a kiss.
Because it was unpleasant to see you looking at another male while in my arms.

You whined, asking what I was doing, but when I said I kissed you because it hurt, you naively softened and wagged your tail.

“…Wait a minute, then let’s find the antidote first.”

As if you had forgotten that you had been angry, you asked if I was in a lot of pain and worried about me.

You always say it like a habit.
That you understand that I hate you because you’re a Destroyer.
That you would understand even if I hated you.

“Ouch, hot! Ugh, it’s here. Hurry up and drink.”

How could I hate you.

You, who always says you hate and are afraid of pain, but still puts your hand in a lightning cage without hesitation.
You, who holds out the antidote to me with your bright red hands, how could I.

“Are you crazy?! If we go out the main gate… wait a minute!”
“I-I’ll try to persuade them! How can we fight all of them!”

I wanted to show you me breaking their limbs to reassure you, who were constantly anxious.
I’m the type who can’t sleep unless I pay back what I’ve received twofold, and I also wanted to show off how strong your mate was, so I persuaded you, who were reluctant, to stand back-to-back with me.

“Wow, this freeze is a cheat, isn’t it? It’s great.”

Seeing you enjoy using another male’s power, my mood soured again.

You would often show interest in my power.

“Can you use other skills besides ice? …Mist? And you’re good with a sword too. Isn’t this a complete cheat character.”

I liked it when you would ask me first, even if it was something I couldn’t understand half the time.
But seeing your eyes sparkle at the power of a bastard who couldn’t even reach my feet, my insides churned again.

I hurriedly finished the slaughter I had been dragging out and enjoying, and urged you to release the imprint, but you refused, saying you wouldn’t.
You made all sorts of excuses and in the end, you didn’t release the imprint on that bastard.

“By the way, what are you going to do, now that you’ve found Midvalen?”

You had been chattering about something all the way here, but I couldn’t hear anything.

As soon as we returned, I broke the neck of the bastard you had imprinted on.

Just in case you had even the slightest feeling for him.
And even if you did, to make you give it up without a second thought.

“From now on, the Valtael is not a Destroyer, but an Awakener.”

After redefining your title and identity to the clan, I returned to the bedroom and looked at your sleeping face endlessly.

“…Mmm, Karvan, are you okay…”

Hearing my name, which had flowed out as if in pain, the vague feelings that had been wandering in a fog began to take shape.
It burned in an instant, as if a wick had been lit.

The ancestors said that a mate was like a limb.
An arm and a leg that you will be with for the rest of your life.

That’s why I had thought so arrogantly.

‘You can live even if one arm or leg is cut off.’
‘If it gets in the way, you can just tear it off.’

But, the place you had imprinted on was my heart.
There is no living creature that can live after its heart is removed.

It was I who had made you run away in disgust at that arrogance and caused chaos in the pack.
But you stepped forward to take responsibility.

“Whether you like it or not, I’m your mate, and the Valtael.”

I had readily sent you, pleased with the words that came out of your mouth, but it was obvious what the Maha had threatened you with.

According to Mashak, you had given a rousing speech and moved everyone’s hearts, but now I know you.

You would have pretended to be fine on the outside, but inside, you would have been constantly anxious and blaming yourself.

I was planning to tell you it wasn’t your fault.
And even if it was your fault, no.
Because I had decided so.

“Ugh, mmm…. Karvan?”

I had promised myself not to disturb you while you were sleeping soundly, but I couldn’t resist your red lips as you mumbled, and I kissed you.
You blinked your dazed eyes, not yet fully awake, and were flustered, but you didn’t push me away as forcefully as before.

“Ugh, I can’t breathe…. How’s your body? Are you okay?”

You, who checked my body first with a choked voice.

‘Just as I look for you as soon as I open my eyes, you are the same as me. You also cherish me.’

Overwhelmed, as I was just staring at you, you held my cheek and checked my complexion, and fumbled around.

My reflection, which was melting helplessly in your worried eyes, was reflected.
My heart ached as if it were being squeezed.
It was beating so violently that I couldn’t tell if it was pain or excitement.

Why did I only realize this feeling now.
That this pain, this heat, was not hatred for a Destroyer.

“Hmph, Karvan, you should rest for now… Ah!”

As I silently bit your imprint vein and urged you to get excited, you flinched and clung to me.
Your sensitive and easily aroused body is perfectly matched to my beastly lust.

I wanted to confirm your feelings, but I didn’t know what to say.
Because the only way I had learned to express myself was through mating.
I started to hold you without a second thought.

You once called me a beast in heat.

You’re not wrong.
My own body, which swells and gets hot at the mere sight of you, is unfamiliar and difficult for me too.

“Ugh, mmm, aah…!”

Even if I lick you every time, your lower parts are impossibly narrow.
Even though we’ve had s*x dozens of times, your body, which acts as if it’s seeing me for the first time, is cruel yet worrying.
‘How will you give birth to my child later.’

I diligently suck on the thick nub that goes up and down, and I even gently coax the ripe clit on the flower petals that are barely open, but your body is always narrow.

Once, I complained that your passage, which would become narrow again as soon as I turned my back, even after I had sucked on it every day, was worrying me.

‘How are you going to accept me when you’re this narrow?’
It was a complaint that was closer to a monologue, but for some reason, you got angry and said something that was beyond my imagination, making me speechless.

“Have the Sura suck it for me beforehand.”
“I won’t even know who it is if I close my eyes anyway.”

You were particularly sensitive whenever we were mating.

It wasn’t once or twice that you would whine, and I rather enjoyed listening to it.
I also know that you didn’t say that to insult my kin.

But, why did my vision go red at those words.

The surge of hateful anger was not directed at you.
It was directed at the faceless male who was diligently sucking your passage in my momentary imagination.

I should have known then.
That I couldn’t let you go.

I should have realized long ago that my body and mind were so broken and crushed by you that I couldn’t handle it, but I foolishly ignored that boiling emotion.

And yet I lumped it all together as hatred and resentment for a Destroyer and ignored you like that, so it was strange that you didn’t fear and hate me.

Knowing that, I couldn’t even blame you when you left.
I couldn’t even get close to the question, ‘Why did you run away,’ which had a clear answer, and just brandished my c*ck and threatened you.

“I-I’ve never hated you!”
“…You were the one who hated me!”

So I don’t know how relieved I was at those words.

When I realized what you were misunderstanding, the dark clouds in my sky finally cleared.

‘It wasn’t because you hated me, because you couldn’t stand me, that you left me. There’s still a chance.’

The Maha say that I’ve gone down the wrong path, that I’m being too good to you.
That you don’t know your place.

‘But it’s me who doesn’t know my place.’

‘There’s no leash on your collar for me to pull, and I’m tied to your leashless collar.’

‘Foolishly, I didn’t even know until now.’

“…Bi, Shinbi.”

I called your name to my heart’s content and held you in my arms.

‘I’ve openly declared that you’re a Destroyer, so now there’s nothing to stand in our way.’
That’s what I thought.

“Ah, huh, aah…!”

‘I want to swallow your whole body.’
‘I want to taste your whining lips to my heart’s content, and suck you dry until no water comes out, but if I do that, my c*ck will be too much for your dry hole, so I held back and just moistened you appropriately and then pulled back.’

“N-no, stop…”

I know your language now.
Shinbi, you’re not honest.
You always say no, you don’t like it, but the gaze you look at me with is the same as mine.
You, who are soaked in lust and crying, are a beast like me.

“Shinbi.”

Just muttering your name makes my heart rate skyrocket.
I’m disgusted by my foolishness for thinking this heart-pounding heat was hatred.
As if in penance, I kissed your instep in repentance and aligned our bodies.

‘How can we be so compatible, the phallus I thought was flawed from birth reacts so ridiculously to you.’
‘Just by smelling your scent, just by placing my lips on your imprint vein, my c*ck drools and welcomes you.’

“Ah, huh, haah, wait, wait a minute…!”

You, who had been receiving my fierce rut for a couple of times, pushed me away, unable to take it anymore.

Your whole body is the color of cherry blossoms.
Your disheveled hair, your large, sparkling eyes, and even your panting areola resemble cherry blossoms.
Your hair, your cheeks, and the hole that I’m mating with are all a deep plum color.

The light that I thought was the exclusive property of the Destroyer has now become my sky blue.

“I-I have something to say!”

I wanted to swallow your rosy mating hole and suck on it right away, but I decided to listen to your words, which you were shouting with all your might.
Otherwise, you would get all sulky again.

As I pulled back the body that was pushing you like a beast, you panted and shouted urgently.

“L-let’s stop now! Let’s end it!”