Echoes of the Past

Ji Xue’s voice still echoed, each word crystal clear and resolute, like stones thrown into a tranquil lake, sending ripples across Lin Mo’s mind.

But now, these ripples were not gentle; they carried the force of tearing open old wounds, violently stirring his buried memories—ten years spent in Qiu Yue’s home.

In the western corner of the Qiu family compound’s rear courtyard, there was a perpetually damp woodshed.

Moss crept up the stone steps, and the air was thick with the smell of dampness and dust—an overwhelming sense of despair for Lin Mo’s senses.

Every morning, before dawn, he would be jolted awake by harsh kicks on the door.

That was the old woman from the Qiu kitchen, tasked with laundry, her name Xiao, with a harsh face and cruel hands.

“Useless thing! Get up, or I’ll pour cold water on you!”

Cold, dirty water poured over him, jolting him fully awake.

He tried to stand, but his weak legs could only twitch slightly. This drew a string of vicious curses: “Lazy bum! Still sleeping?! You’re a useless man! Just looking at you is annoying! You’re soiling Miss Qiu’s home!”

During the day, his tasks were to shell beans, sort out moldy rice, or tear old clothes into rags.

A low stool was always placed in front of him, forcing him into a humiliating, half-crouching position to work.

This was designed by Xiao, who claimed it was to save effort, but in reality, it was to keep Lin Mo lower than everyone else, always on the ground, beneath them.

“Look at this man, without a woman, he’s nothing, just like rotten mud, only fit to crawl!”

Maids would gather in groups, pointing and laughing, their cackles sharp and piercing.

When a servant brought food, they would “accidentally” knock over the bowl, spilling hot porridge or coarse millet buns mixed with dirt onto Lin Mo’s face, legs, and hands.

“Oh, I slipped! Go ahead and pick it up from the ground, eat it! Men shouldn’t be picky; with something to eat, you should be grateful!” The servant’s eyes gleamed with malicious joy, watching as Lin Mo painstakingly and embarrassingly reached for the dirt-covered food.

Sometimes, there would be an extra “treat”—mysterious, foul-smelling water mixed with kitchen waste, poured directly onto the ground in front of him.

Resistance was futile.

Starving himself would be pointless.

Resistance only brought more pain.

There was no humanity here; he was just a tool, one to be discarded when broken.

Lin Mo had once naively tried to imitate the prisoners in movies, going on a hunger strike to protest.

But he forgot that this wasn’t a society governed by law.

“Eat!” Miss Qiu, who kept him, wasn’t feeding him to be a decoration.

Sticks rained down on his back.

His stomach churned, but to survive, he had to close his eyes and scrape the filth into his mouth with his fingers.

Each swallow was agony, a crushing of his dignity. The pain in his chest far outweighed the cramps in his stomach.

Physical torture was bearable; it was the spiritual torment, the slow, daily knife to his heart, that was unbearable.

The most frequent humiliation came from Qiu Yue herself, in the guise of “guidance.”

She would often appear at dusk, elegant and composed, by the woodshed’s door, speaking in a tone that was both pitying and condescending: “Lin Mo, do you know why the world cannot tolerate men? It is because of the immense sins you men have committed: greed, cruelty, shamelessness, and betrayal! These sins have tormented all living beings! Now, you must repay your debts! I love you, to the core of my being. Even if you are sinful, even if you are despised by all, I will stay with you, love you. These are trials to make you better. These are to transform you into a better person.”

Her icy fingers sometimes gripped Lin Mo’s chin, forcing him to look into her eyes: “So, you must accept your fate. Remember, your place is to be lowly. Your only worth is to be by my side. Leave me, and you will be worthless. No one will love you, no one will like you. They will hate you, they will kill you. Only I… Only I will keep you by my side.”

Lin Mo saw no love in her words, only humiliation, like an ice pick stabbing his young, fragile heart countless times, carving deep, indelible scars—

he was guilty, his very existence was a mistake, and he must humbly atone to live.

Ten years, over three thousand six hundred and fifty nights.

His world was that woodshed, the damp floor, Xiao’s splashing water and curses, the spilled food, the filthy meals, Qiu Yue’s theories of original sin and destined lowliness, and the unmasked disgust and contempt from everyone around him.

But perhaps by some miracle, one day, Xiao disappeared, and Yang Po Po moved in.

He no longer had to eat from spilled bowls or filthy food.

No one, except Qiu Yue, bothered him anymore.

It was as if Yang Po Po was his lucky star.

Though he still endured Qiu Yue’s torment and humiliation, this place was no longer a source of endless pain but a place to breathe.

Yang Po Po would joke with him.

They were carefree in their own little world, filled with laughter.

“Well, little Lin, you’re still alive, aren’t you!”

“Yang Po Po! Still not dead from drinking, are you!”

It became their greeting.

But even so, Lin Mo was subtly influenced.

Men were hated by all women.

Women despised all men.

He had to be careful, to be cautious.

Until—

Ji Xue.

This snake-faced girl with a sharp chin, harsh words, a bad temper, and mediocre skills, but who loved to boast, was a princess.

Ji Xue’s voice, like an echo from a distant past, resonated in his ears again.

Lin Mo snapped back to reality, his ears ringing loudly, almost drowning out the present sounds.

He gasped for breath, as if he had just surfaced from deep water, his chest filled with icy liquid. He pressed his forehead, his fingertips cold, his body trembling slightly.

Ji Xue’s gentle touch on his cheek was like magic, bringing an unfamiliar warmth and etching her words deep into his soul.

“Even if you are a man, I won’t dislike you.”

These words were like the final unlocking spell. Click—! Lin Mo heard something inside him, a lock of iron, shatter.

Something hot surged from his heart, rushing to his throat and eyes! His vision blurred, distorted, and dissolved in a burst of tears.

He lowered his head, using all his strength to hold back the surging heat, his shoulders shaking violently.

He couldn’t cry! In this world, tears were a deeper weakness and shame! Especially not in front of her.

‘You’d be ridiculed!’

But how could he hide the mist in his eyes?

Their faces were so close.

“I… I don’t know what you’ve been through, but I once had a little eunuch serving me. He was much younger and shorter than me. He was diligent, observant, always knowing what I wanted. I enjoyed playing with him, and he was serious. He never let me win just because I was a princess. He always gave his all. In every way, he was remarkable. But in the end, he was killed. A princess shouldn’t be close to a man. But I learned so much from him—perseverance, never giving up, being serious and dedicated. They said he stole things. But when I went to his place, all he had was a bed, a chair, and a book, nothing else. They said he peeped at the maids bathing, that he was lewd. But that frail boy, how could he climb a smooth, five-meter wall? They said he was disguising himself, but in the end, I only saw masks on their faces. Maybe you look like a man and have faced many injustices. But even if you are a man, I won’t dislike you.”

Ji Xue gently reached out, lightly hugging Lin Mo’s head, letting it rest on her chest.

She gently patted his back.

‘Now, I’ve got you!’

‘Absolutely!’

‘Though what she said was true, this sudden gentleness wasn’t her nature!’

‘She only wanted to tame Lin Mo!’

‘Royal strategy!’

‘After this encounter and her past experiences, Ji Xue had almost fully understood Lin Mo’s character.’

‘Though he always talked about money, today’s actions weren’t just for money.’

‘Lin Mo… had the potential to be a loyal subject.’

‘He had both ability and background.’

‘If she could win his heart and make him devotedly follow her, seizing the throne wouldn’t be impossible!’

‘Hah! This time, I win!’

Just as Ji Xue thought this, she felt a hand on her chest.

“Princess, but if I am truly a man, what will you do?”

“What?”

Ji Xue was confused, but when she looked at Lin Mo’s hand, following his gaze, she suddenly noticed something between their bodies that shouldn’t be there.

There… there wasn’t supposed to be… something impossible!

“You… you… you… what is… that…?”

“Princess, don’t you see?” Lin Mo smiled darkly.