The Emperor Is Frivolous, Hardly Resembling a True Ruler; Vol 1

Great Yan, the Nine-Doored Hall of Hundred Stoves.

Before the white jade steps, civil and military officials stood in separate rows, with golden censers emitting a mingled fragrance of sandalwood.

“…..”

“…..”

The monarch and his subjects looked at each other in silence.

Actually, it wasn’t that Yan Shou, sitting like a Psyduck, didn’t want to speak; it was just that in the three years since his transmigration, the Grand Tutor had dominated the court, leaving him little to say.

He had transmigrated from modern society to Great Yan in Arknights, becoming the emperor of Great Yan.

What a disastrous transmigration!

Fortunately, he was Yan Shou, not Yin Shou. Although he was destined to be King Zhou, he didn’t transmigrate into the King Zhou on the Star-Picking Tower after the Battle of Muye.

Otherwise, he would have been burned to death immediately after transmigrating, without even getting to enjoy Daji’s company.

However…

There was nothing particularly lucky about transmigrating into the emperor of Great Yan.

The Sui Beasts, the Fiends, Originium, the surrounding feudal lords, and the court full of powerful ministers—none of them were easy to deal with.

Why did that True Dragon make him the emperor? Wouldn’t Wei Yenwu have been a better choice?

Given the situation in Great Yan, how could he be a wise ruler? Wouldn’t he end up dissolved in water like the emperors of Great Ming?

Yan Shou was hesitating whether to make a name for himself like the King Zhuang of Chu, or to be a fatuous ruler in Great Yan, when he felt something flash before his eyes.

Just then, a transparent screen suddenly appeared in front of him, with lines of text constantly appearing.

[Fatuous Ruler System is binding host]

[Binding successful.]

[Host: King Zhou Yan Shou.]

[Please read the usage instructions of this system.]

“???”

[Fatuous Ruler System]

[Fatuity Value: 10]

Wait… Yan Shou suddenly felt something was wrong. A fatuous ruler system?

Assisting the host in becoming a fatuous ruler?

What are the benefits of being a fatuous ruler?

I want to be a wise ruler.

Wait; being a fatuous ruler seems pretty good.

Given the state of Great Yan, and the prestige of the Grand Tutor in the court, those ministers with the blood of gods and immortals—whether Qilin, Dragon, Xiezhi, or Yazi—it was as if the Intercept Sect from Investiture of the Gods had infiltrated the Yin Shang court—not a single one was human.

And there were the Grand Tutor and the Grand Commandant; without power, how could he fight them?

Anyway, with the Grand Tutor carrying the weight forward in Great Yan, he could be a fatuous ruler, not having to attend court every day, enjoying the power he deserved without fulfilling the corresponding obligations.

Three palaces, six courts, seventy-two concubines, doing whatever he wanted, widely selecting concubines in Great Yan, a wine pool and meat forest—wouldn’t that be wonderful?

Yan Shou then saw more detailed text: [System Usage Instructions].

[Fatuous Ruler Rules:]

[Based on the character, the King Zhou template has been matched. The system will periodically calculate and evaluate the host’s actions, converting them into Fatuity Value.]

[Fatuity Value can be used to purchase items from the Shang-Zhou period, from Investiture of the Gods.]

“This is good.”

Yan Shou’s eyes lit up as he scanned the system store.

His matched King Zhou template allowed him to exchange for things from that world.

There were many elixirs for longevity and immortal cultivation, such as Foundation Establishment Pills and Great Revitalizing Pills.

There were even more magical artifacts and divine weapons from the Intercept Sect, the Chan Sect, demon cultivators, and Daoist cultivators.

It seemed he could exchange for anything he could think of from the Investiture of the Gods version.

Could it be that his script was to play Investiture of the Gods in Great Yan?

What a conscientious system!

Did Great Yan, where everyone was a martial arts expert, also hide a script of Investiture of the Gods?

Thinking about it, that ancestral master/Grand Duke Wang from the myths and legends of Great Yan, his surname was Jiang, and the region named after his surname was Jiang Qi.

Although he was ennobled by Great Yan, he never took office.

Moreover, he was the ancestor of the Celestial Masters, with world-shaking abilities.

However, after assisting the Yan clan to take the throne, he disappeared without a trace. Legend has it that someone saw him riding a mythical beast, fishing by the river.

His prototype was Jiang Ziya from Investiture of the Gods. It was reasonable for him to play Investiture of the Gods in Great Yan.

Being a fatuous ruler allowed him to exchange for a bunch of things, making immortal cultivation as easy as drinking water, and with these things, he could ensure a good ending even as a fatuous ruler.

Besides that, he could also exchange for people.

Like Jiang Taigong from Investiture of the Gods, that Grand Duke Wang from Great Yan legends was available. The key was that he could also exchange for some treacherous officials!

Especially the treacherous ministers from the Shang Dynasty, Fei Zhong and You Hun… and Shen Gongbao, who always said, “Daoist friend, please stay!”

With these capable people, would it be difficult to be a fatuous ruler?

Yan Shou instantly understood the system’s intention.

It wanted him to be a fatuous ruler.

Although, with a reasonable worldview and principles, Yan Shou didn’t want to be a fatuous ruler, but then again… this system really knew how to read people.

The happiest thing in the world was eating, drinking, and having fun. He couldn’t wait to dismiss the court and then enjoy his fatuous ruler life.

How hard could it be to be a fatuous ruler?

Looking at the five thousand years of Chinese history, there were very few wise rulers, but there were plenty of terrible, useless, fatuous rulers.

Even if he didn’t know how, couldn’t he imitate them?

Although King Zhou wasn’t really fatuous and was actually a king with a pioneering spirit, there were still many fatuous rulers in history to learn from: Emperor Ling of Han, Sima Zhong, Chen Shubao, Li Yu, Zhao Ji…

Which one wasn’t a top-notch fatuous ruler?

Even his King Zhou template had been manipulated by a bunch of big shots, turning him from a wise ruler into a fatuous one.

Moreover, given the Arknights world view, Yan Shou felt that even if he did nothing and just let the situation develop according to the original plot, he would end up being a complete fatuous ruler!

Alright, let’s be fatuous now.

From today on, I’ll be a fatuous ruler!

“If there is anything to report, step forward. If not, dismiss the court.”

I need to dismiss the court early, so I can go back and study how to be a good fatuous ruler.

This sentence should have been delivered by the captain of the Imperial Guards standing to his side, but Yan Shou spoke himself.

The old Grand Tutor valued etiquette, so he was going to start opposing him.

This was the first step in his plan: to be disrespectful and disregard the Grand Tutor of three reigns.

As Yan Shou’s voice fell, a person stepped out from below, prostrating on the jade steps, holding up a ceremonial tablet.

His face was aged, but it couldn’t hide his solemnity, and his eyes held a hint of excitement.

???

Yan Shou looked down and found that it was the old Grand Tutor.

Strange, why was the old Grand Tutor excited?

The Grand Tutor was indeed a little excited, though not much, but there was definitely some.

Since the True Dragon had passed away and King Zhou had ascended the throne, Great Yan had been peaceful for three years.

This new ruler was like a puppet, which made him very worried.

He was worried that this new ruler would be too wise and difficult to control, and also worried that he would be too fatuous and cause trouble.

Being wise was easy, as long as he listened to advice. If he didn’t listen, he could be beaten.

The Grand Tutor would handle everything. The ruler could play however he wanted.

But if he was too fatuous, it would be a bit difficult to handle.

Even the wisest person might not be as clever as a fool’s sudden inspiration.

No one knew what kind of tricks a fool would come up with, and what kind of disasters they would cause.

Besides worrying about whether the new ruler was virtuous, he was also concerned about his royal demeanor.

What was the demeanor of a king?

Dominance.

As a True Dragon, the new ruler wasn’t dominant at all. He followed the rules in everything, lacking the aura of an emperor.

He listened to him obediently, spending his days hunting and touring the countryside, mingling with the common people.

Was this really good?

Of course not. Such an emperor couldn’t suppress the court full of powerful ministers, especially when his authority wasn’t stable after only a few years on the throne.

But the new ruler’s sudden breach of etiquette in the court gave the Grand Tutor hope.

After all, the Son of Heaven was still the Son of Heaven, and he had to have some majesty.

It seemed that the Son of Heaven had realized this and was showing signs of making a change.

Although there was a possibility of him vying for power, it was still better than being a fool. How could he not be happy?

They were just old customs, so breaking them was fine.

The Grand Tutor was overjoyed and declared his allegiance: “Your subject, burdened with the responsibility of governance, dares not fail to report.

Your Majesty has been on the throne for three years, and the year is coming to an end. Please grace the Jiji Palace to offer incense for a bountiful harvest next year, to inform the people and the nation!”

“???”

Yan Shou was stunned by these words.

He had just matched the King Zhou template, and the old Grand Tutor immediately came up with a scene of offering incense.

Well, offering incense at the Nüwa Temple, was it?

Yan Shou had read a bit of Investiture of the Gods in his previous life.

Although his memory was a bit blurry, he still remembered the scene of offering incense at the Nüwa Temple.

The Shang Dynasty began its decline after King Zhou went to the Nüwa Temple to offer incense.

Great! Offer it! Not only will I offer incense, but I will also write licentious poems in the Nüwa Temple like King Zhou did during the sacrifice!

Good, good, good, I want to be a fatuous ruler!

Whoever wants to sit on this golden toilet can sit on it; I’m not serving it anyway.

Yan Shou couldn’t wait, afraid that someone would disagree, and hurriedly said, “The True Dragon is born with virtue. Giant beasts are rampant, the northwest is collapsing, and the southeast is sinking.

The ancestors of the Yan clan have contributed to the people, and the common people have established shrines to repay them.

Now, the Hundred Stoves sacrifice to heaven, earth, and the four seasons, so the four seasons will be peaceful, the nation will be long-lasting, there will be favorable weather, and disasters will be eliminated.

This is a blessing for the country and its people, and I should personally offer incense!”

The hall was silent for a moment.

What His Majesty said was right!

Even the ministers who thought that the emperor’s travels would burden the people couldn’t say anything.

It wasn’t to celebrate the ancestors’ birthdays and flatter them, but to thank the past ancestors of Great Yan for their contributions on behalf of the common people, hoping for good weather and no disasters.

He was considering the welfare of the world.

If there were disasters, the people would have a hard time living!

This wasn’t just offering incense and celebrating birthdays; it was His Majesty’s great dream of hoping for a prosperous and peaceful country.

A wise ruler!

Yan Shou looked at the ministers’ expressions and realized that he had messed up.

He was getting carried away.

He was determined to be a fatuous ruler who was devoted to hunting, with three palaces, six courts, and seventy-two concubines. How could he say such words for the sake of the country and its people?

Even if he were to go to the altar to sacrifice to heaven, earth, and the ancestors, he should find a treacherous person among his ministers to use as an excuse to attract hatred, and then he should refuse in every possible way.

The ministers should repeatedly persuade him, even threatening to kill themselves by running into a pillar if he didn’t listen.

Only then would he reluctantly agree, and his travels should be as luxurious as possible.

The display didn’t have to be the best, but it had to be the most expensive, with the sole purpose of burdening the people and wasting money.

No, a fatuous ruler should treat this minister coldly, ignoring his advice and doing whatever he wanted.

He should go up and punch the old Grand Tutor three times:

“You want me to go, so I have to go? Are you the emperor or am I?”

No, that’s not right. A fatuous ruler is just fatuous, not devoid of morals. How could he hit a veteran minister of three reigns?

Besides, he might not be able to beat that old Grand Tutor.

Who knows, he might have something like a King-Beating Whip.

Not going? Then wouldn’t he be unable to offer incense?

If he couldn’t offer incense, then what licentious poem would this “King Zhou” write?

If he didn’t write a poem, how would he offend the Sui Beasts and be impeached by the censors?

Yan Shou was a little annoyed. Suddenly, being a fatuous ruler was a bit difficult…

It seemed like it was about to end before it even started.