Even Your Scars… I Want Them All

His words weren’t wrong—if I was going to be shy about something this trivial when we were about to do much more, what then?

But compared to his, my body was unimpressive, and now it was exposed in all its starkness, so feeling embarrassed was unavoidable.

We’d done worse than this in a past life, so there was no need to be taken aback, and I didn’t even think things were progressing too fast.

But having come this far, there was one part where I wasn’t mentally prepared.

There were many parts of myself I didn’t want him to see.

My body, which was just scrawny and unattractive, was one thing, but most of all, I didn’t want him to see the scars left from the abuse.

My adoptive parents had avoided hitting my face to hide the abuse, so many scars were revealed when I took off my clothes.

They were severe, frequent beatings, and because I didn’t receive timely treatment, they remained as permanent scars.

In our past life, on the day Beomwoo first saw my body, he had frowned at the scars.

Even to my own eyes, they were unsightly, so they couldn’t possibly look okay to anyone else.

Knowing that, every time we were intimate, I would ask him to turn off the lights.

Since I already wasn’t an attractive partner in his eyes, I thought if he saw this body too, he would want me even less.

The memory of Beomwoo’s face, his brow furrowed as he looked at my body, was still etched in my mind.

Surely it was just as unsightly now.

Afraid of being hurt again by seeing that expression, Haejin hung his head low like a condemned person and pleaded with him in a mumbling voice.

“Ca, can’t we… turn off the lights?”

“Why turn off the lights? How are we supposed to wash if it’s dark?”

“It’s just……, a little……. It’s embarrassing to look at.”

As he spoke, Haejin wrapped his arms around himself.

I knew Beomwoo said he liked me now, and even when there were no feelings before, we were intimate, so he probably had no aversion to a male omega’s body.

But it was unsightly… I wanted to hide the ugliness.

As I spoke hesitantly, I felt Beomwoo’s gaze lowering to look at my body.

He was silent as he looked at it.

He must dislike it, just like back then.

I didn’t want to see something unpleasant, nor did I want to show it.

I twisted my body, trying to hide as much as possible, fidgeting, when I heard a small, incredulous laugh from above.

“So that was the reason?”

“…….”

“Come here.”

Beomwoo muttered as if it was absurd that such a reason would make me ask to turn off the lights.

Then he grabbed both of my wrists, which were trying to hide my body, and pulled me toward him.

The firm pulling force made Haejin stumble forward.

Holding both my hands, Beomwoo lowered his head and pressed his lips against my chest, right where a scar was.

His lips touched and left in less than a second, but the spot where they had touched and left burned as if set on fire.

“Wh, what are you doing……!”

“It’s fine. It’s not your fault, Haejin.”

“…….”

“They shouldn’t be there, but……. If they’re on you, Haejin, everything about you is beautiful.”

The startled Haejin raised his voice in shock, but Beomwoo, after doing the embarrassing act of kissing the scar, was nonchalant.

Unlike in the past life when he had frowned upon seeing my scars, his face was gentle now.

He seemed to not understand why I would hesitate to undress for such a reason, trying to hide.

The reaction was so different from what I had expected that Haejin blinked, then firmly closed his mouth.

Lies…

Thinking back to how, after my one request in our past life, he would silently turn off the lights whenever we were intimate afterward, he must not have wanted to see them either.

The only difference now was that love had blossomed between us.

But even with the blinders of love, there’s no way these hideous scars could look okay.

But even knowing he was telling a white lie, I didn’t feel the same urge to hide my body or feel upset as I did back then.

Different from before, he didn’t turn off the lights, and his act of pressing his lips against me, as if wanting to prove it wasn’t a lie, felt almost sacred, making my heart tingle.

Beomwoo gently soothed Haejin, who was on guard with his hackles raised like a cat, and naturally led him into the shower stall, pulling the lever.

Whoosh— Water poured from the showerhead and streamed down our bodies.

Even after all that soothing, Haejin was startled by the cool water hitting his body and jerked back, but in the narrow shower stall, with Beomwoo pressed tightly against his back, there was no retreat.

Beomwoo reached from behind, grabbed the lever again to adjust the temperature, and spoke.

“Is it too cold?”

“Ah, a, a little…….”

“The villa is in the mountains, so it takes a bit to warm up. It’ll get warm soon.”

Beomwoo spoke as if asking for understanding, since it was a private villa.

But contrary to his words, the water soon warmed to body temperature.

Once the water temperature was right and our bodies were sufficiently wet, Beomwoo squeezed shower gel from a bottle on the bathroom shelf into a pouf and handed it to Haejin.

Haejin reflexively said thanks and accepted the pouf, starting to wash.

Perhaps because he knew Beomwoo was standing naked behind him, even though he just had to wash, it felt like every move was being watched, making each gesture feel self-conscious.

As Haejin washed his body stiffly, like a bad actor overacting, Beomwoo, who seemed to have been washing himself behind him, instantly snatched the pouf from Haejin’s hand.

“I’ll do it for you.”

“Huh? Ah, no……! I, I’ll do it myself!”

“I feel like I’ll die waiting.”

Now he even wants to wash me……!

For Haejin, just entering the bathroom and washing together had required immense courage, but Beomwoo seemed impatient watching Haejin wash so hesitantly and took matters into his own hands.

Beomwoo held the pouf and gently lathered soap over Haejin’s body.

I couldn’t remember the last time someone washed me like this.

It must have been when my birth parents were still alive…

Back then, it was ticklish and funny, making me giggle and laugh while washing.

But now, perhaps because I was so much older and the person was different, the hand moving from my back to my chest, drawing a line down the center and gradually moving lower, tickled in a different, peculiar way.

My body was already heated from the kiss that happened as soon as we entered the villa, combined with the unfamiliar experience of washing together and the knowledge of what was to come.

Maybe because of this situation, where the slightest touch could cross a line, even just this lathering felt like Beomwoo was caressing me.

Normally, even if I felt this erotic sensation, I could just pretend not to notice, but since I wasn’t wearing a stitch of clothing, my lower half was completely exposed.

Especially because he was personally washing me, I couldn’t twist my body to hide.

Even if I said it was enough, that I’d wash myself, it was obvious he wouldn’t let me, probably because I was too slow.

The only thing Haejin could do now was desperately try to ignore this situation, to calm this feeling by singing the national anthem in his head.

I clenched my eyes shut, repeatedly balling and unclenching my innocent fists, trying desperately to distract myself in my own way.

Then, from Beomwoo, who had been quietly washing me, came a low laugh that rumbled in his throat.

“Haejin.”

“……Y, yes?”

“Down there… it’s standing.”

……I’m done for.

Looking down, my member was half-erect and swaying.

I had tried my best to hide it, but in the end, it was all futile.

Given the atmosphere so far, it was clearly an erection, and even if I denied it, no one would believe me.

But Haejin, utterly embarrassed, tried to make excuses, saying it wasn’t that kind of meaning.

“It’s…… because it’s ticklish……”

“Haejin, when you’re ticklish, you get a hard-on and give off sexy pheromones?”

“…….”

But there was no way my hastily fabricated, unconvincing lie would work.

Moreover, thinking about it, it wasn’t just a problem with my lower half, as he said.

The pheromones were also a problem.

Haejin’s pheromones were fainter than other omegas, but even so, when I got into this kind of mood, I couldn’t help but emit them.

Since I couldn’t sense my own pheromones, I had no way to explain this time.

So Haejin, unable to say anything this time, bit his lower lip firmly.

Beomwoo, who seemed to have finished lathering, rinsed off the soap with water from the showerhead and spoke.

“Haejin’s pheromones when wet…… they’re incredibly sexy. You don’t know, do you?”

“…….”

How could I know? I have no way of knowing what my own pheromones are like.

But there was one part of his statement Haejin could agree with.

Beomwoo’s pheromones also became sexier when wet.

Beomwoo’s pheromones were like the ocean.

When wet, they seemed to deepen.

Maybe the reason I wanted to see the sea in Busan, feeling stifled, was partly because they resembled his pheromones.

Thinking my pheromone scent might have become like that too, I had even less to say in my defense.

Suddenly, Beomwoo, who had been standing opposite me rinsing my body, said something out of the blue.

“Shall I suck it for you?”