The Unintended Hero and a Persistent Freeloader

I am Hero Emily. We’ve arrived at Helter’s house now… wait, is this Helter’s house?

“Lu Ren, why are we at your house?” Helter, who was trailing behind me, inquired.

I froze, realizing it truly was my home!

“Uh… it was just a habit. I just walked home… because I often used to bring you to my place for free meals.”

The mention of free meals immediately brought to mind Helter’s history of over five hundred such occasions, spanning three long years… and to this day, there had been no hint of him ever intending to repay me.

“Then let’s talk at your place. And while we’re at it, I’ll grab some dinner too.” The sight of a grinning, drunken Helter made me yearn to stab him then and there! ‘Damn it! He’s freeloading again!’

“You…”

I truly wanted to scold him, but then…

“Lu Ren, I assume you don’t want anyone else to know about you becoming the Hero.”

‘That sly dog! He’s actually learned to threaten me! I’m a man of my word… even if I’m a girl now… and I won’t yield to you! Do you really think saying that will make me obediently let you in?! If a tiger doesn’t roar, do you think it’s a Hello Kitty?!’

“You—”

“Hey, folks! The Hero has something to say!”

“Stop! Big Brother!” I clutched his hand, a pitiful whine escaping me. “Isn’t it enough that I’ll let you freeload on my dinner…?”

Helter chuckled, patting my shoulder. “Your Big Brother is still your Big Brother, even if you’re not a little brother anymore, but a little sister.”

‘Alright, Big Brother… his intelligence actually came online when it came to free meals… it’s truly unbelievable.’

At my doorstep, I instinctively reached into my pocket as usual… only to find the hem of a skirt.

‘Don’t worry! I still have a spare key!’

I pushed aside a stone by my front door, and, as expected, the spare key lay beneath it.

Fortunately, I had taken this precautionary measure years ago, fearing I might lose my key while hunting or doing chores.

‘Huh… where did the key under the stone go? You really did manage to surprise me after all!’

‘Well, this isn’t so bad. Helter won’t be able to come into my house for a free meal now.’

I turned to face Helter.

“Big Brother… I can’t find the key…”

Upon hearing this, Helter immediately drew his greatsword!

“No! Stop! I still have ten years of rent unpaid! What am I supposed to do if you smash the door in?!”

Helter seemed to find logic in my words, nodding before sheathing his greatsword once more.

‘Heh heh, no way in now, right? You’ll just have to go home honestly.’

To my utter surprise, he clapped his hands together, as if a sudden realization had struck him, then, without a word, he pulled my house key from his pocket and unlocked the door.

‘What kind of move was that?!’

“I just remembered I took the spare key ages ago.”

‘Why would you take my spare house key?! That’s incredibly creepy when you think about it!’

“Ages ago? When?!”

“Roughly three years ago, I’d say.”

‘Good heavens… it seems he took it the very first time he came to my house for a free meal…’

Once inside, Helter propped his greatsword against the wall and unceremoniously sat on my bed, leaving me no choice but to drag a small stool over and sit before him…

“Alright, tell me. What’s going on with you, little brother?”

Helter was the first to speak.

“Big Brother… it’s actually quite difficult for me to explain. To put it simply, the root cause is that I accidentally killed the Hero…”

As soon as I finished speaking, Helter reeled back in astonishment.

“What? How did your small frame manage to kill the Hero?”

“It’s a long story…”

“Then make it a short long story.”

“Well… it was because of a small knife laced with potent poison…”

“A small knife? Are you kidding me? Even if you ambushed her, there’s no way you could kill the Hero.”

“It wasn’t an ambush, it was just… I used this knife to prepare food… and after the Hero ate it, she kicked the bucket.”

I clasped my hands together, looking utterly helpless and incredibly awkward.

“Poisoning!”

Helter stood up abruptly!

“Lu Ren! I never thought you’d be so insidious! Poisoning someone’s food is undeniably the act of a scoundrel!”

“Big Brother! What are you saying?! It was an accident! What benefit would I gain from killing the Hero?!”

“I can’t guarantee that. You’re an assassin; I have no idea what your motives might be.”

“What motives could I possibly have?! Miss Hero had no valuables on her! Are you implying I’d kill her and then… take advantage of her while she was still warm?!”

Helter’s eyes widened, and he clamped a hand over his gaping mouth.

“Whoa! You didn’t actually…”

From his horrified gaze, I knew he had misunderstood me yet again!

“Lu Ren, Big Brother knows you’ve been single for many years, but you can’t lay hands on a corpse! That’s a sickness, and it needs to be cured…”

“Shut up! I, Lu Ren, am an honorable assassin, and though I’ve only killed one person in my entire life, I still have my dignity! I don’t need to be lectured by an idiot like you!”

“Then how can you prove you didn’t commit such an abominable act…?”

‘Why does it feel like the topic has completely derailed…?’

“I… I…” I stammered, my face flushing as I averted my gaze. “I’m… still a virgin, I guess…”

“A virgin? Male or female? Come on, Lu Ren, how do you prove something so… intimate?”

He had truly stumped me.

I stood there dumbfounded for a long moment, utterly unable to utter a single word…

“Explain yourself.”

‘Explain my ass! How am I supposed to explain that?! Prove I’m a virgin by letting you have your way with me? I’m not capable of such an outrageous act! Besides, neither the author nor the readers would agree! Bah, what even are authors and readers?’

“Anyway, you have to believe me! The killing was an accident, and the… incident with the corpse never happened! We’ve been brothers for so many years; you can’t possibly doubt me completely, can you?”

Helter nodded.

“It’s not that I don’t believe you, but you need to tell me the whole story. You know my comprehension skills are limited,” he said, tapping his head. “Tell me all the whys and wherefores, then I’ll consider whether to trust you completely.”

“Oh…”

I then recounted every single event that had transpired.

This entire explanation took me well over three hours. The actual recounting of events took only thirty minutes; the remaining time was spent meticulously clarifying and elaborating…

“Mhm, I understand now,” Helter said, nodding meaningfully.

“Big Brother, it’s good that you understand!”

“So, you accidentally poisoned the Hero, tried to destroy the evidence but failed, got caught red-handed by Key, lost your original body, and now you’re forced to live as the Hero.”

“Exactly! Long live understanding!” I exclaimed, jumping up and down excitedly.

“Unbelievable. Becoming Miss Hero… so you’ve really turned into a girl now?”

“That’s right! My formidable chest is all real!”

I subtly, yet deliberately, showcased the soft, yielding mounds on my chest.

“Hmm, a pity there’s not much material.”

Before I could even react, Helter had already reached out to touch!

“What are you doing?!” I shrieked, instinctively slapping away his lecherous hand.

“Why such a strong reaction? I was just testing the feel.”

I stumbled back a few steps, roaring, “Go feel your own pectoral muscles! Miss Hero’s body isn’t just for you to test out the feel!”

“Oh…”

“And! Remember not to spread what I told you tonight, understand?!”

“Understood.”

‘Finally, that’s over… With Helter’s mouth sealed, my identity should largely be safe now.’

However, I was far too naive. As a hapless soul blessed by the god Sein, problems were never that easily resolved…

At the dinner table.

“Lu Ren,” Helter called, taking a swig from his flask.

“What is it?”

“You’re the Hero now, so does that mean you’ll be embarking on a journey soon?”

“Yes… Key demands that I do so… though I’m not quite ready to leave Newbie Village yet.”

“Hey, can I come along?”

‘Bring Helter along?!’

‘Huh? I hadn’t thought of that! If I bring along Helter, such a powerful greatswordsman, I’d barely have to lift a finger for any of the fighting on the road! This is great!’

Just as I was about to agree…

A sudden burst of light erupted from my chest, and the spirit Key swiftly shot out from within!