You Knew All Along

“I remember now. Are you happy?” Su Yan asked, his eyes curving as he looked at his side profile, waiting for an answer.

But Lu Lin was just silent.

Before long, he opened the window, and the wind rushed into the car, blowing their bangs.

After that, there was an endless silence.

He didn’t know how he should answer.

He did hate himself, hated his selfishness and his powerlessness.

Upon learning that Su Yan had recovered his lost memories, he was happy for only a moment before a sense of loss and helplessness quickly surrounded him.

“I know, you’re too embarrassed to say it. You’re just like you were when we were kids,” Su Yan said, looking out the window, his smile disappearing into the wind.

“Lu Lin, actually, back then, I had something to say to you too,” Su Yan said, squinting as he began to search through his newly recovered memories.

“I like you too. “

Lu Lin froze, his fingertips gripping the steering wheel so tightly they turned white, his slightly widened pupils filled with disbelief.

At first, he had found a perfect excuse for Su Yan’s distance—he had overstepped, he was too controlling, his possessiveness was too strong, he didn’t like men.

“I was planning to tell you the next day, that we would get together when we went to university,” Su Yan said, finally uttering the words he had held back for years.

“Do you like me?” Lu Lin’s voice trembled slightly, as if he couldn’t believe such a wonderful thing could happen to him.

“…”

Su Yan: “…Haven’t you been able to tell these past few days?”

“Wasn’t it because I forced you?” Lu Lin asked, looking straight ahead.

“I smashed that lock on Mount Hua. “

“I thought that by keeping my distance, you wouldn’t be angry anymore,” Lu Lin said calmly, revealing things that shocked Su Yan one after another.

“What lock on Mount Hua?” Su Yan frowned, staring at Lu Lin.

“Why don’t I know about that?”

The car gradually drove towards the suburbs, the scenery along the road quiet and beautiful.

Lu Lin couldn’t hold back any longer and blurted out everything he had been bottling up for so long.

“I hung it up a long time ago when I realized I liked you. “

“I hung up a love lock,” he said, his voice losing confidence as he spoke, his ears burning.

Su Yan had been silent since just now, his curved eyes taking in Lu Lin’s shy appearance.

“A few years ago, I smashed it again. “

“It was hung for a total of 1314 days. “

“I calculated the date and smashed it. “

‘Does he remember it that clearly?’

He still remembered that at the time, Lu Lin had been heartbroken by Su Yan’s rejection, but what could he do?

He had never thought that not only would he be rejected, but he would also be directly alienated.

On the twentieth day of being alienated, he was completely numb.

Su Yan was the most important part of his life; no matter what stage they were in, he always had a place for him deep in his heart.

He had never thought that he and Su Yan would end up like this.

That night, he flew directly to Mount Hua, wearing thin clothes, shivering from the cold.

He spent several hours looking for that lock, and then he smashed it.

After he came back, his mind was in a fever, and he almost broke down completely.

He bought a ton of restraining props, as well as locators and miniature cameras.

It was at this time that his already warped personality became even more warped.

But he could never bring himself to do it.

He felt that someone as wonderful as Su Yan should belong only to him, but it was a contradiction; he also hoped that Su Yan would always live with fiery passion.

Until Qi Zhiyao told him that Su Yan wanted to date in university.

“Lu Lin, you really haven’t changed at all,” Su Yan said, closing the window and leaning his head against it.

“That necklace you gave me. “

“Are you returning it to its original owner?” Su Yan asked, pulling the necklace that he always carried with him, said to bring him peace, from his pocket.

Lu Lin felt a little guilty, his lips pressed into a thin line.

Su Yan’s voice came again.

“This is the one I gave you when I was seven, right?”

“I saved up my allowance for a long time,” Su Yan said, holding the necklace in his palm and examining it carefully.

Although the craftsmanship was a bit rough, it was indeed the best thing he could come up with at the time.

When he was a child, his parents were afraid he would spend his money recklessly, so his allowance was strictly controlled.

Lu Lin watched as they got closer and closer to their destination.

He was about to speak when he heard Su Yan’s choked voice.

“So they really are my parents, and you really are my childhood sweetheart…” Su Yan blinked his slightly sore eyes and stuffed the necklace in his hand back into Lu Lin’s hoodie pocket.

During his high school years, Su Yan always felt a weak sense of belonging, as if he shouldn’t be living so well, that everything he had was stolen.

“Baby, don’t cry,” Lu Lin said.

He was driving and couldn’t be distracted, nor could he hug him.

“Brother,” Su Yan said, only shedding a few tears and unconsciously calling out this name.

Lu Lin’s heart skipped a beat.

He hadn’t heard this title in a long time.

Su Yan was half a year younger than him, and when they were young, he would always follow behind him, calling him “brother. “

While ensuring their safety, Lu Lin sped up, still comforting Su Yan nonstop.

Soon, they arrived at their destination.

What greeted them was a cemetery, so large it seemed endless, stretching far into the distance.

The wind was strong, so cold that he couldn’t stop rubbing his hands together to warm them up.

When Lu Lin saw this, he let out a soft chuckle and took his hand.

“I brought you here without asking where we were going or what we were doing. “

Lu Lin raised an eyebrow, a flash of contempt in his eyes, and lazily led Su Yan forward.

Finally, they stopped in front of a tombstone.

On it was a photo of a young man with a cold expression, and below it was his information, as well as the date of his death.

Lu Lin hated him to death.

“He is also Shen Yichen. “

“No, it should be the soul living in Shen Yichen’s shell,” Lu Lin said faintly.

“Shen Yichen, this person, has a very weak body. “

“He has hardly left the house for the first ten years of his life. “

“You probably don’t know about this. “

“Until one day, everyone was saying that the only son of the Shen Group, Shen Yichen, had a drastic change in personality, and his health had improved a lot. “

“It wasn’t until I saw him that day that I was sure. “

“After all, this person had said before that he wouldn’t only have one chance. “

Lu Lin said it all in one breath, then squatted down, looking at the photo on the tombstone.

He felt a chill.

Not only did he not go to hell after he died, but he also didn’t reincarnate.

Instead, he occupied someone else’s body and did unreasonable things.

The current victim was Shen Yichen, but he wasn’t planning on meddling.

Just as long as he didn’t appear in front of Su Yan, it was an easy task for Lu Ang.

Otherwise, he wouldn’t have asked him for help.

Lu Lin looked up and met Su Yan’s gaze, smiling faintly.

“It’s okay, it’s all in the past. “

Su Yan had never thought that he would be the original cannon fodder.

Not only were his memories tampered with, but his body was also occupied by someone else for a year.

Lu Lin didn’t say, and Su Yan also didn’t know, that on the first day his body was occupied, he got into a car accident and was bedridden for a year, his physical fitness plummeting.

This was also why Lu Lin had asked Qi Zhiyao to stay by his side.

“So it was this moron?” Su Yan asked, pointing at the tombstone, a breath caught in his chest.

Lu Lin’s pupils widened.

He had never heard Su Yan swear in all his life.

He covered Su Yan’s mouth.

“Shh. “

Su Yan: “Mmm… what are you doing?”

“He’s done so many bad things, of course he’s a moron,” Su Yan said, pulling Lu Lin’s hand away, a little angry because he thought Lu Lin was defending that person.

“How much of a moron?” a clear, cold voice sounded from behind.

The two of them immediately turned their heads and saw Shen Yichen with dark circles under his eyes, holding a small bouquet of flowers, looking haggard.

Lu Lin took Su Yan’s hand and pulled him behind him, as if the person in front of him was something dirty.

“How can I, one person, fight the two of you?” Shen Yichen was so angry he laughed at Lu Lin’s protective behavior.

He squatted down and placed the flowers in front of “his” tombstone.

He quietly stared at the photo.

It was Su Yan who spoke first.

“Do you have anything you want to say?”

The wind lifted Shen Yichen’s thin shirt, and the setting sun cast its glow on his expressionless face.

“Su Yan, do you think this is some kind of TV drama?”

“Where the villain gets a redemption arc at the end. “

His lips opened and closed.

“What I want to say is that everything I did was for myself. “

“Including hurting you,” Shen Yichen said.

No matter how stupid he was, he knew it was the end for him, but he didn’t want to be redeemed.

The young man on the tombstone had died at the age of seventeen.

He was also physically weak, and had been plagued by various illnesses since he was a child.

But he didn’t have a family like Shen Yichen’s, who would hold him in their palms for fear of him melting.

Shen Yichen’s parents were also very responsive to his needs, and his physical weakness was somewhat similar to his own.

He quite liked his current parents, but unfortunately, the system told him that he could only get close to the son of luck of the world, Lu Lin, and capture him, in order to have a chance to continue living.

The system flew in mid-air, making the capture sound extremely simple, rubbing his only bit of intelligence on the ground.

From then on, he really believed it.

He followed the plan given by the system step by step, and the result was predictable.

He made a huge fool of himself.

The system pushed all the blame onto him and even abandoned him.

Hearing this, the corner of Lu Lin’s mouth twitched, and a cold smile escaped his lips.

“Moron. “

This time, it was Su Yan’s turn to cover Lu Lin’s mouth.

“You’re OOC. “

Shen Yichen showed no expression at the couple’s sarcasm, but his nose stung, and his eyes burned.

The two of them thought Shen Yichen was so strong, but thinking about it, it was reasonable.

After all, he had experienced the forum war.

They just lowered their eyes and looked coldly at the squatting Shen Yichen.

The “strong” Shen Yichen soon burst into tears, sobbing as he spoke to the tombstone about his struggles.

“Was it f*cking easy for me? “

“I had to capture this cold-faced iceberg who already belongs to someone and is a neurotic yandere, and I also had to capture the yandere’s boyfriend. “

“…”

“I’m going to die of anger. “

“Not only did I get nothing, but I was also sent to a remote county by Father Shen. “

“How am I supposed to live?!”

Shen Yichen cried very sadly, his eyes red and his face flushed from the excitement, his shoulders trembling.

He looked extremely pitiful.

That is, on the premise that you don’t know what he did.

“Isn’t this all your own doing?”

Lu Lin’s cold words were added to Shen Yichen’s sobs.

Lu Lin raised an eyebrow, patting the corner of his clothes that had accidentally touched Shen Yichen, his eyes full of contempt.

“Thanks to you, you’ve used up all the Shen family’s love. “

Otherwise, he wouldn’t have been able to get Lu Ang to drive him away so easily.

After speaking, Lu Lin took Su Yan’s hand and left.

Shen Yichen stopped sobbing, kneeling in front of his tombstone, dazed, his fingertips curling as he confessed everything.

****

During this period of final exams, Lu Lin was even busier, running between school and home.

Su Yan was the same as usual, frantically memorizing the knowledge points highlighted in his dorm.

But looking at the entire book, which was full of key points, he was at a loss.

These teachers probably wished their students would memorize the entire book without missing a single word.

“God, please bless me so I don’t fail a single subject this final exam,” Su Yan said, lying on his dorm bed with a book covering his face, his hands hanging limply by his side, looking half-dead.

He wasn’t moved by Chen Xubai’s idiotic words.

“God! “

“I am your most loyal believer. “

“As long as you guarantee I won’t fail, I’m willing to increase your followers for you…”

Chen Xubai’s suddenly loud voice startled Su Yan, making him jump.

He quietly recited the knowledge points he had just consolidated.

“God! “

“Please let me pass!”

Su Yan couldn’t help but sigh.

He sat up abruptly and opened his bed curtain.

“Chen Xubai! “

“You’ve been praying for an hour!”

“Do you know how many knowledge points you could have memorized if you had used your heart to study?”

Su Yan threw his book aside, got out of bed, and put on his slippers, unconsciously muttering, “Even if you’re praying to Jesus, it’s useless, you know?”

He hadn’t had any classes all day, and Lu Lin had gone home to deal with things.

He had hardly gotten out of bed all day, only hearing Chen Xubai mumbling to himself since he came back at noon.

He had endured it at first, and he had endured it in the middle, but when he heard that cult-like talk about increasing followers, he really couldn’t take it anymore…

Su Yan hadn’t eaten all day, only getting up to briefly wash up.

His hair had become fluffy from lying down for so long.

He looked at Chen Xubai’s devout appearance, speechless.

After seeing the “god” he was praying to, he was so shocked that he dropped his phone, which fell to the ground with a “bang. “

“Chen Xubai, you’re crazy,” Su Yan said, looking at the scene in front of him, too shocked to speak.

Finally, he didn’t even bother to pick up his phone and pointed at him.

“Xubai, did you have a high fever when you were a child?”

He thought to himself that an idiot couldn’t have gotten into A University.

Chen Xubai had an expression of making a big fuss over nothing.

“Calm down, I know in your eyes I’m a dumbass…”

“Yes, that’s right, exactly, you’re right,” Su Yan nodded vigorously, completely agreeing with this statement.

So he did have some self-awareness.

Chen Xubai seemed to understand the meaning of the adult phrase “I say one thing, you say ten. “

He looked at the “you know it too” expression in Su Yan’s eyes and added, “This is a turning point in my sentence. “

Su Yan: “Uh, no need for a turning point. “

“What normal person would pray to Ultraman?”

Su Yan even moved closer, taking a few steps to avoid misunderstanding him.

After getting a clear look, he realized it really was Ultraman.

In the middle was a large Ultraman computer wallpaper, and on the left and right were portraits of Ultraman.

“Did your goddess draw this?” Su Yan asked, pointing at the sketch of Ultraman, because he knew Chen Xubai’s goddess was from the art school next door.

“Mm-hm. “

There was no need to be cute.

“This… how did you convince him? “

“I’m just asking,” Su Yan couldn’t help but ask.

Mainly because this scene was too ridiculous.

If he didn’t have a dream of becoming an internet celebrity, he would have started a channel with this bizarre scene.

“Because I drew a flower fairy for her,” Chen Xubai said, sitting on his chair, his ears burning as he spoke, his entire face turning red.

Su Yan let out a soft chuckle.

Did he hear that right?

So there really were two such compatible people in the world.

This was truly an eye-opener for him.

As he squatted down to pick up his phone, he silently wished them well.

“I think you two will last a long time. “

Chen Xubai said softly, “We’re not even together yet. “

Su Yan’s phone vibrated, a message notification.

[.: Your heart rate is so fast. ]

Su Yan glanced at the smart watch he had worn the day before and typed a reply with a blank expression.

[sy: If you saw a psycho, your heart rate would speed up too. ]

He didn’t expect Lu Lin to be so good at finding time to relax.

While fighting against Lu Ang, he would also check on his dear baby’s heart rate and location.

After that, Lu Lin didn’t reply again, probably getting busy again.

Chen Xubai looked at Su Yan’s “looking at a moron” expression and shouted, “Do you not believe me?”

Su Yan: “Maybe. “

That was putting it too mildly.

Chen Xubai, this big man, couldn’t help but reminisce about the past.

“I was really protected by this Ultraman card before. “

“You probably don’t understand this feeling. “

It would have been better not to explain and just quietly wear the title of idiot.

Su Yan leaned against the wall, looked him up and down, bit his lip, and chuckled softly.

“Alright, I believe you. “

Chen Xubai was helpless, Chen Xubai was resigned, Chen Xubai accepted his fate.

“Mm. “

After lying back on his bed, he couldn’t get into his books either and began to reminisce about his past with Lu Lin.

For example, in the third year of junior high, due to Su Yan’s playful nature, his grades had long fallen to the bottom of the class, but he still wanted to go to the same school as Lu Lin.

So every night, he would beg Lu Lin to tutor him, saying that he could only understand when Lu Lin explained it.

But he was also fickle.

If he still got a problem wrong after doing it three times, he would lose patience and start to act spoiled, saying that he wouldn’t study anymore and that he was only suited to picking up trash outside.

At this time, Lu Lin would be so charmed by Su Yan that he would hug him and coax him.

Su Yan would also take the opportunity to act spoiled, hugging his waist tightly.

“I’m not studying, I’m not studying, my head hurts. “

This kind of thing had happened countless times since they were young.

Could it be that Lu Lin was bent by him?

He was really not well-behaved.

“If you get into the top ten in the class, you can do whatever you want,” Lu Lin said with a smile, looking at the person hugging him and acting spoiled.

Hearing this, Su Yan’s eyes lit up.

“Really? “

“Alright then, I’ll try a little harder. “

****

“How were the exams?”

On the day of the exams, it happened to be the first snow in Haishi.

The entire city was covered in the first snow.

Su Yan’s hands were a little red from the cold.

He buried his face in his scarf, only revealing his beautiful eyes.

“This kind of question can only appear in middle school. “

“We’re already in university,” Su Yan said, looking at him resentfully.

Actually, Su Yan wasn’t in a very good mood today, because he didn’t know when Lu Lin would be going abroad, even though he had said he would tell him wherever he went.

Now that the exams were over, students with suitcases could be seen everywhere, preparing to go home.

Some simply didn’t go back, bustling about for their livelihood, thinking of working in Haishi until the start of the semester.

The two of them walked quietly like this.

Su Yan spoke, “Do you want to cook for me?”

Su Yan was like this.

Whatever he wanted to eat or do, it wasn’t “I want” but “you want. “

Ever since he recovered his memories, he had become even clingier to Lu Lin, as if he wanted to make up for the past few years.

Su Yan’s nose was red from the cold, and he shrank further into his scarf, snowflakes clinging to his chestnut hair.

Just as he was about to tuck his hands into his sleeves, Lu Lin took his hand.

Su Yan turned his head to look at him, his eyes curving.

“You really like me. “

“Mm. “

Just as Su Yan was about to tease him a few more times, Lu Lin took his hand and placed his own face in Su Yan’s palm, tilting his head and giving his hand a kiss as light as a dragonfly’s touch.

When Su Yan looked at him, he would squint his peach-blossom eyes and let out a chuckle.

His usually cold and handsome face was now filled with a smile.

Su Yan’s face flushed for a moment, but he refused to be outdone, saying arrogantly, “Kiss me again. “

Lu Lin knew Su Yan too well.

He was good with his words, and he was also good at getting brave after drinking.

Su Yan pursed his lips and stopped walking, wanting to see Lu Lin kiss his palm again.

Who knew, Lu Lin squeezed his chin, held his face with both hands, and quickly kissed him on the lips.

As he got closer, that cold, snow-tinged scent enveloped him, and then he couldn’t see anything, his entire being on fire.

Su Yan thought of that sentence: Your face is really so beautiful that even your wicked appearance has a certain charm.

****

Su Yan wanted to spend as much time as possible with Lu Lin, so he followed Lu Lin back to his own apartment.

Click—

The sound of the door unlocking.

He saw that everything in the house was in its original place, and there were no suitcases.

The clothes were also sleeping soundly in the wardrobe, and he felt relieved.

At least for now, Lu Lin wouldn’t leave him.

Su Yan would patrol the kitchen with his hands behind his back like an old cadre while Lu Lin was cooking, but he would be driven back to his own living room by Lu Lin.

Today’s dishes were all Su Yan’s favorites, even though he had said he was fine with eating anything.

No wonder Lu Lin knew him so well.

During this time, he was particularly fond of exclaiming this sentence.

He didn’t eat much because he had something on his mind.

Lu Lin didn’t ask either.

They both knew what was on each other’s minds and didn’t want to bring up that sad topic.

Lu Lin drove him back to the master bedroom, telling him to rest for a while, not wanting him to wash the dishes.

Su Yan didn’t want to play with his phone or sleep, so he peeked his head out of the master bedroom to observe Lu Lin.

He saw Lu Lin pouring a white powder into a glass.

Su Yan quickly and timidly pulled his head back, pretending he didn’t know anything.

A moment later, Lu Lin walked in with a glass of water and said casually, “Zai Zai, have a glass of milk. It will make your stomach feel better. “