“So… you ate something strange, and then you woke up this morning to find yourself a girl?” Luo Tianlian sighed, pressing a hand to her forehead, after hearing my brief account.
“So, you believe me?” I asked cautiously.
“What else can I do but believe you? You’ve always been doing weird, outlandish things ever since we were kids. I’ve just gotten used to it.” Luo Tianlian shrugged.
‘Just what kind of impression do I leave on you, anyway?’
“So, what are you going to do now? Are you just going to live like this from now on, Sister?”
The word “Sister” sent a shiver down my spine, goosebumps prickling my skin. “I’m absolutely not going to live like this forever! If someone can turn a man into a woman, then surely they can turn a woman back into a man!”
“So, do you have any leads?”
“…Most likely, I’ll have to go find The Golden-haired Girl again.” I had sworn to myself that no matter what, I would never interact with her again, yet that ‘no contact’ resolution was nullified so quickly.
However, conventional methods wouldn’t solve such a bizarre incident. No matter how I thought about it, my only option was to seek help from the girl who was also an anomaly.
“Speaking of which, did you happen to see who brought me home?” I remembered something and turned to ask Luo Tianlian.
“Who cares about all that? I was in my room playing games all night. This morning, I just came to pester you to make breakfast, like always.”
‘…Right, that’s my sister for you.’
‘I almost want to cry.’
“Well, this is no time to be depressed! I need to pull myself together!” I slapped my cheeks lightly, trying to rouse my spirits.
“…By the way, are you really going out dressed like that?”
“Huh? Is something wrong with it?” I paused in surprise.
“Absolutely not! Listen up, a girl’s attire is very particular! If you go out dressed like a boy, you’ll either be taken for a pervert or a prostitute!” Luo Tianlian retorted.
“I-is it really that serious?” I was startled.
“Of course! A girl’s world is darker than you could ever imagine. Being a woman is exhausting, you know.” Luo Tianlian said, crossing her arms.
“You’re holed up at home playing games all day, barely have any friends… what’s so exhausting?” I muttered under my breath.
“What did you say?”
“Nothing, I said nothing at all. So, what should I do?”
“Don’t worry. I’ve already prepared everything a girl needs. Look.” Luo Tianlian triumphantly held up her phone, opening the Taobao app’s shopping cart.
Just one glance and I was stunned. I’d never realized before how many things girls typically used – dozens of items, from cosmetics to everyday clothes, and even sanitary pads. What truly shocked me, however, was the four-digit price tag.
“Luo Tianlian, you’re so kind! I can’t believe you’d buy all this for me… I’m sorry, I misunderstood you before.” I looked at her with a touched expression.
“Hm? What are you talking about? This is just an advance on your allowance. For the next three months, you won’t have any money besides food expenses, you know?” Luo Tianlian said as if it were obvious.
‘Give me back my indignation!’
“But even with express shipping, things from Taobao will take days to arrive, right? What am I supposed to do until then?” I challenged.
“Until then, I’ll allow you to wear my clothes.”
“Then buying all those things was completely pointless!”
“What are you talking about? If you can’t change back, you’ll have to continue living as a girl, won’t you? It’s essential to be prepared.”
“While that’s certainly a possibility, please don’t deliberately point it out and dampen my spirits!”
“Shut up. From now on, let me, your senior in girlhood, teach you how to be a proper girl.”
Intimidated by her imposing presence, I chose to keep my mouth shut.
For the next several tens of minutes, I endured what felt like inhumane torment. Luo Tianlian evidently regarded me as a real-life dress-up doll, applying various substances to my face and forcing me into all sorts of cosplay outfits.
“Wait, where did you get all these things?”
“Online, of course.”
“But I’ve never seen you wear them.”
“That’s because I never intended to wear them. I just bought them as souvenirs. Now, you can wear them, which counts as making the best use of them.”
‘That’s not how you use idioms, thank you very much!’
“Change me back immediately! I’m going out to do something important, not attend a comic convention!”
“Tch, fine.” Only after I said that did Luo Tianlian reluctantly pull out her own everyday clothes.
“Alright, open your eyes.” After another ten minutes, Luo Tianlian led me to a mirror. I tremulously opened my eyes.
‘…Well, what can I say? It’s surprisingly normal. I thought I’d turn into some hideous mess.’
“What, not satisfied with my makeup skills? I can try a different style, you know?”
“No, no, no, this is perfect!” I stared at the beautiful girl in the mirror, lost in a daze. ‘Is this really me?’ I couldn’t help but reach out, wanting to touch the reflection. Though it still felt a little strange psychologically, I ultimately accepted this new self.
Suddenly remembering something, I couldn’t resist lifting the hem of my skirt and performing a curtsy, just like the girls I’d seen in anime.
“While you look quite cute, the thought of your original face makes me sick… It seems not only your body but your mind has turned into a girl’s too?” Luo Tianlian said coldly.
“It’s not like I wanted this! I don’t know why, but I’ve felt strange ever since this morning, completely unable to control my own actions!” ‘I’m so sorry if I make you feel disgusted!’
“By the way, are these clothes a bit tight? My chest feels swollen, and my shoulders ache terribly…” I frowned, rubbing my chest.
“…Even though, even though you’re just a man, to think you’d…”
“Hm? What’s wrong, Tianlian? You look a bit pale. Are you catching a cold?” I asked Luo Tianlian with concern.
“Shut up, you cow-b*tch!”
“I got cursed out of nowhere!”
“Get out, get out, just get out!”
“Wait a minute, dressed like this, people won’t think I’m a pervert, right?” After a moment’s thought, I asked Luo Tianlian with some lingering unease.
“Huh? What are you, a hooker-in-training, even talking about?”
“That’s even worse!”
****
Despite my unease, I still headed out. I couldn’t shake the feeling that everyone on the street was staring at me. Was I doing something wrong? Being a girl truly was a profound art; I definitely needed to study it properly. Speaking of typical girls, President came to mind. I decided I’d ask her for advice… No, wait! I’m a man! Why should I learn how to be a girl, hey! The most important thing is to figure out how to change back!
“Did you see that girl? She looked so cute…”
“Seriously, and those breasts! They’re incredible. She even looks like a high school student…”
“Gotta snap a photo for posterity…”
‘Woah. For some reason, passersby suddenly pulled out their phones and started taking pictures. Do they really think I look ridiculous? No, I need to leave quickly! I don’t want to be a laughingstock!’
“Ah, the girl ran off.”
“You must have scared her away, didn’t you?”
“Nonsense! You’re the one who scared her.”
“What a shame…”
“By the way, she runs so fast. Is she on the track team?”
I ran all the way to my classroom at school, feeling both relieved to have shaken off the passersby and astonished by my own physical stamina. Yesterday, I was a weak scholar who couldn’t even tie up a chicken, yet today, as a girl, I could effortlessly run several kilometers with energy to spare. Clearly, some unimaginable changes had definitely occurred within me.
Although I desperately wanted to rush to the police station to find those two, my concern for Bingying’s safety led me to school instead. Of course, I wasn’t here under the name Luo Tianchen, but rather using my sister Luo Tianlian’s identity.
“Anyway, I don’t go to school often, and as siblings, we do look quite alike. With my student ID, you basically won’t be recognized.”
‘Is that really true? If I were recognized as Luo Tianchen, ruining my reputation would be secondary. Being dragged into some bizarre human experimentation lab would be truly tragic.’
“Yo, Luo Tianchen, you’re pretty late today, aren’t you?” A large hand suddenly clapped down on my shoulder. I trembled all over, then turned to see Yang Mingzhi with a bright, cheerful smile.
‘My life is over!’
‘No, I can’t panic. I need to calm down. If I lose my composure, the situation could get even worse.’ I tried to mask my inner panic with a smile. “Um, you’ve got the wrong person. I’m his younger sister, Luo Tianlian.”
“Huh? Is that so? Now that you mention it, he does have a sister who rarely comes to school… My apologies, my apologies. Your backs looked so similar, I actually thought Luo Tianchen had a sudden whim to wear women’s clothes to school today. Wow, I never would’ve imagined a guy like him would have such a beautiful sister.” Yang Mingzhi immediately apologized.
‘You damn bastard, what kind of guy is “a guy like him”? Explain yourself, or you won’t be walking home today!’
Still, these were minor matters. It was enough that I hadn’t been recognized. I suppressed the urge to punch him and replied, “My brother had some things to take care of today, so he couldn’t come to school. He asked me to inform his homeroom teacher and friends.”
“Oh? Is that so? In that case… My beautiful lady, would you care to join me for dinner?” Yang Mingzhi’s demeanor suddenly shifted. He looked like a male lead from an early shojo manga, a rose clamped between his teeth, his eyes seemingly twinkling with stars.
As his friend of three years, I knew all too well what his invitation for “dinner” implied. To my knowledge, most of the girls who agreed to dine with him ended up in his bed that very night. The rest ended up in his bed the second night because the first night’s bed was already full…
‘I never thought I’d receive an invitation from him one day. My feelings are a bit complicated… No, that’s not the point. The point is, I’m here as ‘my’ sister, and he dares to make a move on my sister! He must have a death wish!’
‘Eat shit, Yang Mingzhi!’ I roared internally, yet my expression remained impassive. ‘No, I need to quickly think of a way to deal with him. If I refuse without a good reason, he’ll definitely get suspicious. That’s it! What would Luo Tianlian say? What would my sister say?’
Ah, I had it.
I looked up and replied with an equally brilliant smile, “Go take a look in a puddle, you three-dimensional creature.”
“A puddle…!” Yang Mingzhi suffered a DEBUFF effect!
“You’re clearly just a brown-haired orangutan, yet you want to have dinner with me? How laughable. You should just stay in the zoo, or you might get shot, you know.” I maintained my smile.
“Orangutan…!” Yang Mingzhi suffered a second DEBUFF effect! Damage doubled!
Excellent. Just a little more effort…
“To me, all men other than my brother are just scum. Honestly, this world only needs one man—my brother. Why haven’t the rest of you just died already?”
“Scum…!” Yang Mingzhi suffered a triple DEBUFF effect! It was super effective! Yang Mingzhi collapsed.
“M-my apologies for disturbing you!” He fled as if his life depended on it.
Meanwhile, the rest of the class stared at me in horror. Excellent. This way, I could simultaneously crush Yang Mingzhi’s confidence and brand Luo Tianlian with the title of “perverted brother-complex,” thus retaliating for all her actions against me. It was truly killing two birds with one stone. Even Zhuge Liang wouldn’t have done better! Mwahahahaha!
“How pitiful. She’s so pretty, but she has such a perverted brother…”
Huh?
“Yeah, it must be because of her perverted brother, brainwashing his cute little sister…”
‘W-wait a minute! Why am I still the one getting cursed at?!’
“Damn it, I can’t believe a guy like that has such a cute sister. He definitely forces his sister to sleep in the same bed as him, and then every morning they do things like: ‘Brother, no, I… I can’t take it anymore…’ ‘What are you saying? We’re siblings, isn’t doing these things only natural? So, hehehe…’ ‘A-aah! Yamete! Iku! Ah!’ How enviable—no, how detestable!”
‘I would never do such a thing! If anything, I’m the one being bullied! Which genius here has such an active imagination? It’s a pity they’re not writing novels!’
“Don’t worry, Xiaolian. If anything happens, you must tell me. I’ll definitely protect you from your perverted brother.” A girl with teary eyes appeared from somewhere and tightly clasped my hand.
“Ah! Me too!”
“Me too!”
“Damn it! You guys are too fast! Me too!”
‘Why?! Why isn’t this going as I imagined?! Shouldn’t everyone be avoiding me?! A girl’s world is truly terrifying!’ I was on the verge of tears.
“Huh? What’s going on? Alright, everyone settle down… Starting today, we have a transfer student joining our class. She’ll be spending the next month or so with us. Let’s give her a warm welcome!”
Upon seeing the Teacher enter the classroom, the students slowly returned to their seats in twos and threes.
Phew, saved. I let out a sigh of relief but was immediately drawn in by the Teacher’s words. A transfer student? Who transfers at this time of year? Could it be for bonus points to get into Xingjiang University?
Everyone else was also intrigued by the mention of a transfer student, listening intently for what came next.
“Now, please come in, Xia Luohua.”
And so, The Golden-haired Girl walked into the classroom.
The girl bowed slightly, her golden hair shimmering even brighter in the sunlight. She wore Xingjiang Middle School’s unique custom uniform—a black and white shirt paired with a short skirt—which perfectly accentuated her captivating figure.
“Alaina Christian is my birth name. My Chinese name is Xia Luohua. Please take care of me. I hope to spend a wonderful May with all of you.” The girl spoke with perfectly fluent Mandarin.
The entire class was silent, all stunned by her beauty and doubting if they were hallucinating. Only my astonishment differed completely from theirs.
‘Why, why is *she* here at school?’
Suddenly, her eyes lit up as if she had discovered something. A jolt went through me, and before I could even dodge, she skipped over to my side. “I found you.”
This was my third encounter with her.