I Almost Took Him

He was truly a foolish, pitiful person.
What was so great about someone like Oh Jaeyeol?
Why had he loved such a pathetic loser, who chose someone like Ahn Seonwoo over him, for so long?
Why was he sick in bed, wounded by a bastard like that?
If Oh Jaeyeol hadn’t made that idiotic mistake, Haeyoon would probably still be loving him with all his heart.
Believing Oh Jaeyeol was his destiny, believing no one would ever love him like that.
Having forgotten someone like Baek Jeongha existed.
As these thoughts surfaced, anger welled up inside him.
Back then, when he saw Seo Haeyoon playing the good friend, oblivious to Ahn Seonwoo’s contempt, he had thought him a fool.
Yet that white, handsome face would come to mind at times.
If he had done something then, if he had tried to understand Seo Haeyoon a little more, if he had acted rather than just saying words to shake off Ahn Seonwoo.
If he had, would Seo Haeyoon have been by his side sooner?
Would he not be sick like this now?
His chest tightened.
Even though it had started as mere curiosity, in this moment, Seo Haeyoon felt desperately important to him, as if he had longed for him his entire life.
He wanted to see Haeyoon’s face—healthy, not parched, smiling with true happiness.
“…….”
Without realizing it, Jeongha placed both hands on the bed and slowly lowered himself toward the sleeping Haeyoon.
Whether because of his illness or a terrible nightmare, Haeyoon was making whimpering sounds as if crying.
At this moment, the amusement or curiosity Baek Jeongha always gave as reasons for his actions meant nothing.
None of this was amusing.
Feeling his heart tighten with pity and sadness over someone who was wearing down their body for incomprehensibly stupid reasons—that had never once been ‘interesting.’
And yet, Baek Jeongha was here simply because he felt sorry for Seo Haeyoon, because he cared enough that he wanted to bear the pain for him if he could.
“Look at me, hyung.”
The moment Jeongha whispered, so softly it was barely audible, an immense storm of pheromones began to rage around him.
The thick scent began to seep through the body of the Beta, who could feel none of it.
“Not that bastard. I’m here, right now.”
Oh Jaeyeol was nothing.
Baek Jeongha was, and always would be, an Alpha above Oh Jaeyeol.
He would bet his entire remaining life on it.
So forget that bastard now.
Look at me. Me, who is by your side now.
“Baek Jeongha…?”
As if by a miracle, Haeyoon opened his eyes at that moment.
Tears dripped from his wet lashes—had he been crying in his sleep?
Jeongha, who had brought his face close to Haeyoon’s, didn’t pull back, but looked straight into his eyes.
Those eyes, black as the deep sea, were frighteningly unfathomable, yet he didn’t want to look away.
Baek Jeongha was not a man who ran.
“Yeah. I’m here now.”
The thrill of knowing that those abyssal depths were now looking only at him was electrifying.
Even knowing Haeyoon wasn’t fully awake, Jeongha lowered his head and claimed his lips in a deep kiss.
“Ah…!”
Haeyoon’s reaction was slow.
Even as a snake-like tongue traced the line of his lips and teased the gaps, he couldn’t push it away.
“f*ck….”
Jeongha cursed, his lips still pressed against Haeyoon’s.
He couldn’t hold back any longer.
Despite his feverish body, Haeyoon’s lips were hotter than anywhere else, delivering an unfamiliar thrill to Jeongha.
Euphoria surged, as if his head might explode from the kiss alone.
His vision flickered, as if intoxicated by the overwhelming pheromones.
Even though Seo Haeyoon was a Beta who could emit no scent at all.
Jeongha cupped the back of Haeyoon’s head with one hand, tilting it back, and angled his own head to deepen the kiss, their lips meshing more insistently.
Haeyoon’s lips parted easily without resistance.
As he skillfully delved in and sucked on Haeyoon’s tongue, he felt Haeyoon’s limp body tense.
The inside of Haeyoon’s mouth, touching the tip of his tongue, was incredibly hot.
With him already sick and barely conscious, his responses were clumsy and slow compared to Jeongha’s rough, urgent movements.
Rather than frustrating, it was intensely stimulating.
The more he sucked on Seo Haeyoon’s tongue and swallowed his saliva, the more parched he felt.
It wasn’t enough.
He wanted to reach deeper, to draw out even more intense reactions.
Even though he knew Haeyoon was struggling, unable to breathe properly, Jeongha pushed his tongue deeper inside, pressing his body down on top of him.
He covered Haeyoon’s sweat-dampened forehead with his hand, then swept it back naturally, winding the long hair around his fingers.
His mind knew he should stop.
Taking advantage of someone in a weakened physical and mental state was something Baek Jeongha normally despised.
At the same time, his Alpha instincts recognized the situation.
In this moment, if he wanted, Baek Jeongha could have Seo Haeyoon.
It would be easy to overpower someone so sick they were barely conscious.
Haeyoon wouldn’t even be able to attempt a gesture of refusal.
Jeongha was certain of it.
‘Things like this hurt too much… I never want to experience it again. I hate it. It hurts, it hurts so much.’
But at that moment, what surfaced in Jeongha’s mind was Haeyoon’s voice, tearfully saying love was too painful, that he was sick of it, that he never wanted to experience such pain again.
In the past, he would have mocked this as a pathetic drama, playing with emotions that might not even exist, might have sneered right in front of him for being so melodramatic.
Those words now pierced Jeongha’s heart sharply.
Eventually, Jeongha stopped ravaging his mouth and pulled back.
Suddenly deprived of the stimulation, Haeyoon struggled to lift his heavy eyelids and looked at Jeongha.
Breath that had been forced to his chin due to Jeongha’s relentless pressure, tangled hair, pale skin, the corners of his eyes reddened with fever.
As Jeongha looked down at him, a feeling he had never experienced for anyone else blossomed in his heart.
He wanted to protect this person.
Not to use him as he wished, then discard him whether he got hurt or not, but to stay by his side, to keep him from getting hurt further, from crying.
That feeling had nothing to do with amusement or curiosity, the reasons he had always used.
Jeongha gently touched Haeyoon’s eye corner with the tip of his finger, then as if entranced, lowered his head and pressed his lips to Haeyoon’s forehead.
It was an act with no trace of sexual intention, almost reverent.
“Sorr…!”
Just as he was about to blurt out an apology without thinking, Jeongha startled himself and quickly shut his mouth, moving off the bed.
What was there to be sorry for?
He had gotten involved in this mess solely to help Seo Haeyoon get revenge, and now he was even nursing him back to health when he was sick, something completely out of character.
If Jeongha hadn’t helped at every turn, Seo Haeyoon would probably have just been foolishly taken advantage of and never gotten any retribution.
So what was there to apologize for, just because he got caught up in the moment and kissed him?
“Hoo….”
Maybe it wasn’t Seo Haeyoon who was broken, but Baek Jeongha himself.
Jeongha adjusted his position, feeling like he wanted to slap his own cheek.
Perhaps this was Seo Haeyoon’s real weapon.
Who knew if this was his method—acting all innocent and naive to bewitch people.
“I’m really losing my mind.”
But Jeongha also knew very well that was utter nonsense.
Ultimately, sinking deeper into self-reproach, he had no choice but to let out a heavy sigh.
It seemed his own condition was more of a mess than the sick Seo Haeyoon’s.

* * * *

“Ugh….”

Jaeyeol, who woke up before Seonwoo, sat up in bed, feeling a splitting headache.
A terrible pain, as if someone was drilling into his temples, soured his mood.
Last night, Jaeyeol and Seonwoo had drunk to celebrate the first night of their honeymoon.
He thought he couldn’t get drunk no matter how much he drank, but the hangover seemed to be real.
Now that he thought about it, his stomach felt queasy too.
After their big fight before the honeymoon, Jaeyeol and Seonwoo had been cold to each other even on the plane, but they’d had a dramatic reconciliation last night.
It wasn’t so much a genuine reconciliation as both of them just burying things because they didn’t want to ruin the trip, but the important thing was that the atmosphere had improved.
‘Sorry, my fault.’ ‘No, I’m sorry.’
After exchanging insincere apologies, they’d shared drinks and then slept together.
It had been a more intense encounter than usual.
Remembering the utterly chaotic events of last night only made him feel worse.
Because along with it came the realization that the reason for the rougher-than-usual s*x hadn’t been Ahn Seonwoo.
Astoundingly, Jaeyeol had thought about his ex-lover throughout their so-called first night.
Seo Haeyoon, who had willingly endured pain for him with a Beta’s body.
His gentleness, how he smiled and said if it felt good for him, then it was good for him.
The subtle scent of paint that would emanate when they unexpectedly became intimate.
Seo Haeyoon’s gentleness, which only a lover could see, feel, and savor, and which Baek Jeongha now probably possessed in its entirety, tormented Jaeyeol.
The more he struggled not to think of it, the more vividly it appeared.
Jaeyeol deliberately pretended to be more aroused by Seonwoo, trying to ignore his feelings, but he couldn’t fool himself.