The Price of Possessiveness

The university club recruitment fair was a bustling affair, the main thoroughfare of the campus teeming with students and a vibrant clamor.

Lan Yucheng found herself half-dragged, half-coaxed by her roommate to simply make up the numbers for the literature club. Qing Xinxue, naturally, followed her like a shadow.

For Qing Xinxue, such a dense, noisy environment, filled with unfamiliar peers, was nothing short of torture.

She clung tightly to Lan Yucheng, her fingers unconsciously clutching the hem of Lan Yucheng’s clothes. Her face was pale, her eyes filled with wariness and unease, like a small creature thrown into a pack of wolves.

The small bell around her neck emitted a faint, scattered jingling with her rapid breaths, lost amidst the roaring crowd.

“Interested in the literature club, classmate? Come take a look!”

A cheerful, sunny boy, likely a club officer, enthusiastically extended a flyer. His smile was bright, his gaze naturally falling upon Lan Yucheng.

Lan Yucheng, out of politeness, accepted the flyer and replied casually, “Thank you, I’ll take a look.”

It was a perfectly ordinary interaction, barely even a conversation.

Yet, in that instant, Qing Xinxue’s taut nerves seemed to snap, scorched by that unfamiliar ‘sunlight’ directed at Lan Yucheng.

She abruptly lifted her head, her gaze locking onto the still-smiling boy. Her eyes instantly became hollow and terrifying, swirling with a primal madness and ferocity, untamed by any ‘rules’.

“Don’t you dare look at her!”

Her sharp voice abruptly tore through the surrounding din, carrying a near-animalistic hoarseness.

Everyone froze.

The boy’s smile stiffened. He stared in bewilderment at this small, seemingly delicate girl who had suddenly erupted.

A warning bell clanged loudly in Lan Yucheng’s mind. ‘This is bad,’ she thought, immediately reaching out to pull Qing Xinxue away.

“Xiao Xue, stop it!”

But it was already too late.

Qing Xinxue seemed utterly deaf to her voice. She violently swatted away Lan Yucheng’s outstretched hand, then strode forward, directly in front of the boy. She tilted her head back, her eyes, brimming with madness, locked onto him. Her voice, though barely a whisper, was laced with a venomous chill as she spat each word.

“She is mine.”

“Look at her again, and I’ll gouge out your eyes.”

“Get lost.”

The final word, “Get lost,” was so soft it was almost a breath, yet it contained a chilling threat and murderous intent.

The boy’s face went pale, terrified by the undisguised madness in her eyes and the bloody content of her words. He instinctively took a step back. Several students nearby also looked horrified, casting nervous glances.

Immediately, a small circle of silence formed around them, drawing various gazes of inquiry, astonishment, and even morbid curiosity.

Lan Yucheng felt a surge of intense shame and fury rush to her head.

She seized Qing Xinxue’s arm, her grip so fierce it felt like her bones might shatter. “Qing Xinxue! What nonsense are you spouting?! Apologize, now!”

Qing Xinxue flinched violently from the painful grip, her body trembling. She seemed to snap back slightly from her extreme loss of control.

She looked at Lan Yucheng, the madness in her eyes rapidly receding, replaced by immense panic and grievance. Tears welled up instantly. “Sister Cheng… he… he looked at you… he…”

“Shut up!” Lan Yucheng hissed, her voice low and furious, her face ashen.

She forcibly suppressed her churning emotions, then turned to the still-shaken boy, managing to force out an awkward smile. “I’m so sorry. She… she isn’t feeling well today. She’s talking nonsense. My deepest apologies!”

The boy looked uncertainly at the seemingly deranged Qing Xinxue, then at Lan Yucheng’s grim face. Finally, he waved his hand, mumbled “It’s fine, it’s fine,” and quickly turned to squeeze into the crowd, as if fleeing a plague.

The surrounding whispers and strange glances did not immediately disperse.

Lan Yucheng felt her face burning. She avoided looking at anyone, clutching Qing Xinxue’s wrist tightly, practically dragging her as she forcefully pushed through the crowd, escaping that utterly mortifying place.

****

The journey home was silent, the atmosphere suffocatingly heavy.

Upon arriving, Lan Yucheng abruptly released Qing Xinxue’s hand and slammed the door shut with a resounding bang.

The loud noise made Qing Xinxue tremble violently.

“Kneel!”

Lan Yucheng turned, her voice as cold as ice, her eyes blazing with unprecedented fury and a hint of disappointment she herself hadn’t detected.

Qing Xinxue was terrified by this unfamiliar severity and coldness. Her tears flowed even more fiercely, yet she dared not disobey in the slightest. Trembling, she knelt on the cold floor, looking up at Lan Yucheng with a mournful gaze. “Sister Cheng… I was wrong… I really was wrong… I just… I was just so scared…”

“Scared?” Lan Yucheng stared down at her, her chest heaving. “What are you scared of? Scared that if someone looks at me, I’ll run off with them? Qing Xinxue, what exactly am I in your eyes? An object without will, exclusively yours?!”

“No! No!”

Qing Xinxue shook her head frantically, crawling forward to try and embrace Lan Yucheng’s legs. “Sister Cheng, you’re the best… you’re the most important person to me… I just… I just can’t control it… When I see others look at you, here…” She pounded her chest forcefully. “It hurts so much… like I’m going to die…”

It was the same old rhetoric.

Extreme love and pain used to package that suffocating possessiveness.

Before, Lan Yucheng might have continued to lecture her with ‘rules’ and soothe her with ‘rewards’.

But now, after the public humiliation, a deep sense of powerlessness and weariness washed over her.

She suddenly felt incredibly fatigued. This carefully maintained balance, built on fear and manipulation, was ridiculously fragile and came at a high cost.

She looked at Qing Xinxue, who was kneeling on the floor, crying heartbrokenly. For the first time, she didn’t calculate the optimal response to control the situation. Instead, she felt genuinely… exhausted.

She watched her in silence for a long time, then ultimately said nothing. She turned and walked into the bedroom, locking the door behind her.

She shut Qing Xinxue and her tears, her repentance, her suffocating love, all out.

She needed to be alone. She needed to escape this suffocating space.

****

In the evening, Lan Yucheng quietly opened her bedroom door.

Qing Xinxue was still kneeling in the same spot, her posture unchanged. Her eyes were swollen like walnuts, her face pale. Seeing Lan Yucheng emerge, her lips moved, but no sound came out. She merely gazed at her with desperate, yet hopeful, eyes.

Lan Yucheng averted her gaze, ignoring her. She walked straight to the entrance to change her shoes.

“Sister Cheng… where are you going?”

Qing Xinxue’s voice was hoarse and broken, filled with immense fear.

“To get some fresh air.”

Lan Yucheng’s voice was devoid of emotion. “You stay home and reflect properly.”

She didn’t say “don’t follow me,” but her icy tone was more intimidating than any direct command.

Qing Xinxue indeed dared not ask further, nor did she dare to stop her. She could only watch as Lan Yucheng opened the door and left, once again abandoned to the cold, silent solitude filled with the bitter fruit of her own making.

****

Lan Yucheng went downstairs, walking aimlessly around the neighborhood.

The evening breeze on her face slightly dispelled the heavy tightness in her chest.

She didn’t know where she was going; she just didn’t want to be in that suffocating place.

Unconsciously, she found herself at the small garden in the center of the complex.

She sat on a familiar bench, watching neighbors walk their dogs and stroll by, savoring this momentary taste of ‘normal’ life.

“Xiao Cheng?” A gentle voice sounded beside her.

Lan Yucheng looked up to see Su Yiyi carrying a small trash bag, seemingly on her way to dispose of it. Her face held a hint of surprise and concern.

“So late, sitting here alone? Are you alright? You don’t look so good.”

Perhaps it was the vulnerability she couldn’t hide at that moment, or perhaps Su Yiyi’s gaze was simply too gentle and understanding. Lan Yucheng’s tightly strung nerves suddenly relaxed a fraction.

She managed a weak smile. “I’m fine, just… feeling a bit stifled. Came down for some fresh air.”

Su Yiyi sat beside her, placing the trash bag at her feet. She didn’t press for details, merely kept her company in silence. This quiet companionship was more comforting than any interrogation.

After a long while, Lan Yucheng finally spoke, her voice tinged with a weariness she hadn’t even noticed herself. “Sister Yiyi… tell me, if a relationship makes you feel… very tired, very suffocated, yet it also feels like… you can’t easily break free, what should you do?”

Su Yiyi turned her head, looking at her gently. “Is it about Xiao Xue?”

Lan Yucheng was silent for a moment, then nodded softly.

At this point, further concealment seemed unnecessary.

“That child… her dependence on you is indeed extraordinary.”

Su Yiyi chose her words carefully. “I was a little worried last time. This afternoon… near the university town, I happened to pass by and thought I saw you two… having some unpleasantness?”

Lan Yucheng suddenly looked at her, a flash of embarrassment in her eyes.

So… she had seen it too.

Su Yiyi quickly waved her hand. “Don’t misunderstand, I wasn’t intentionally prying. I just happened to see Xiao Xue very agitated and you pulling her away… I was a bit worried about you two.”

Lan Yucheng gave a wry smile. Since things had come to this, she no longer wanted to maintain any perfect facade.

She briefly recounted what had happened that afternoon, omitting the more twisted details and the battles of control and counter-control. She only spoke of Qing Xinxue’s extreme possessiveness and her public outburst.

“…I know she might… have some psychological issues, but I seem… unable to handle it.”

Lan Yucheng’s voice was filled with helplessness. “I feel very tired. Sometimes I even feel… like I’m becoming abnormal myself.”

She finally poured out the confusion and pressure buried deep in her heart to someone she saw as a reliable elder.

Su Yiyi listened quietly, her brows slightly furrowed, her eyes full of sympathy and understanding.

“Xiao Cheng,” she sighed softly.

“This isn’t your fault. Taking care of someone with an unstable psychological state is inherently draining, and you can even get caught up in their emotions. It’s perfectly normal for you to feel tired and confused.”

She paused, her tone growing more serious. “However, you need to understand that you are not a professional psychologist. Xiao Xue’s situation has clearly exceeded what you can handle. That extreme possessiveness and aggression will not only harm others but will also backfire on her, and… on you.”

“My advice is,” Su Yiyi looked at her, her gaze sincere and solemn, “perhaps you should consider seeking professional help. For instance, persuade her to see a psychologist. Or… at the very least, you need to establish clearer, healthier boundaries with her. Unwavering indulgence and compromise will only allow the situation to worsen.”

Professional help? Clear boundaries?

Lan Yucheng listened in a daze. These words ran counter to the ‘strategy’ and ‘taming’ she had been pursuing all along.

She had always believed that she could control everything herself, that she could ‘cure’ Qing Xinxue, that she could complete the so-called ‘capture mission’.

But Su Yiyi’s words were like a cool, clear light, illuminating her world that had become chaotic and dim due to their twisted relationship.

She suddenly realized that she might have been going in the wrong direction from the very beginning.

And the cost was that she herself was almost lost within it.

Watching Lan Yucheng fall into deep thought, even with a hint of sudden realization and lingering fear in her expression, a trace of complex emotion flickered in Su Yiyi’s eyes, though she said no more. She merely patted Lan Yucheng’s shoulder gently.

“Go back. It’s getting cold at night. Have a good talk with her, but don’t forget, protecting yourself is the most important thing.”

Su Yiyi picked up her trash bag and left.

Lan Yucheng sat alone on the bench, mulling over Su Yiyi’s words, her heart turbulent.

Seek professional help?

Establish healthy boundaries?

This sounded… like another path, beyond system tasks and ‘perfect capture’.

A path… more like one a ‘person’ would take.

She looked up, gazing at the faint light spilling from her own window.

That cage woven with love and madness—did she still have the courage and strength to try and… break it?