Horrible things

Seeing her remain motionless, he appeared remarkably patient.

His voice was soft as he coaxed her, “Do not make me catch you and bring you down myself.”

“…Wait!”

Chang Wan took a breath, forcing herself to remain steady. She didn’t know what Chu Changqing’s current state truly entailed, but she didn’t dare to pointlessly stroke the tiger’s whiskers.

“I… I’ll come down, but before that, I have questions for you.” Chang Wan sat on her sword, maneuvering it a few feet lower. She looked down at him. “…I’ll come down once you’ve answered me.”

The youth’s eyes were stained red, radiating a dangerous, heavy pressure. He looked somewhat indifferent. “Wanwan, you have no leverage to negotiate with me.”

Chang Wan decided to be shameless for once. “How could I have no leverage?”

“The leverage… is me coming down of my own free will, versus being coerced by you.”

Chang Wan continued with a thick skin, “If it’s the latter… you might possess my body, but you will never possess my heart.”

System: […]

Chu Changqing watched her in silence for a moment. He seemed to be suppressing something; his face was a mask of calm, but the light in his eyes shifted and flickered.

After a long time—long enough for Chang Wan to think he was about to snatch her—he spoke in a low voice.

“Ask.”

Chang Wan breathed a sigh of relief. She hesitated before asking, “The beasts on this mountain…”

“Did you kill them all?”

Though she knew she was asking the obvious, she desperately wanted to hear it from him.

She thought: sometimes what you see isn’t the whole truth. While the System’s words were hard to doubt…

She wanted to hear his personal account.

And, if it were true, she wanted to know his reason.

“Yes.”

Chu Changqing did not deny it.

Chang Wan stared at him intently. “Did you let me out just now because you wanted me to see this?”

Chu Changqing: “Yes.”

He wanted her to stop fearing him, yet he couldn’t stand their artificial interactions. He wanted to tear off his mask and show her his most hideous side.

One day, all his sins would be exposed. A whitewashed peace could never last.

A person as filled with “justice” as Chang Wan would eventually leave him.

Rather than waiting for that, it was better to shatter all pretenses and tell her plainly… and then…

She would surely try to leave him.

And he would finally have a reason to keep her forever, to clip her wings.

“Why?”

Faced with Chu Changqing’s mindset, Chang Wan felt fear, but even more so, she wanted to understand.

“You aren’t a person who kills the innocent indiscriminately,” Chang Wan said, trying to stay calm. “You must have a reason… tell me the reason.”

The girl’s voice trembled slightly, but she was sincere.

Chu Changqing endured the violent desires in his heart. The beastly bloodline was boiling again, nearly devouring his sanity.

His bloodline—the legacy dissolved into his very marrow—forced him to lose his reason, to crave blood and slaughter.

To kill indiscriminately.

…It was his nature.

“There is no reason.” Chu Changqing looked up, the red in his eyes deep and cold. “I am born this way—burdened with sins, a butcher of the innocent.”

Chang Wan’s heart pounded. She had a premonition…

Perhaps she would die here, becoming a sacrifice beneath his broken blade.

She was terrified; even as she struggled to maintain her composure, she was scared to death.

But…

He stood there in his black robes, quietly looking up at her with blood-red peach-blossom eyes and a cold, indifferent face. Even the blood on his broken sword had dried.

He was a villain.

When he spoke those words, his expression was as calm as if he were stating a simple fact.

She saw his red eyes.

In an instant, she thought of many things.

Due to the System’s malicious influence, her memories of the original plot were somewhat blurred.

But a protagonist must have a spark of brilliance to make people so obsessed. No one would love a truly heartless, irredeemable villain.

“Come down.”

Chu Changqing commanded quietly. The heavy pressure he radiated was nearly suffocating. Chang Wan’s pupils shrank—this pressure was definitely not that of the Heart Movement stage… it had even surpassed her Spirit Solitude level!

It was…

But…

“…No, you aren’t.” Chang Wan clenched her hands, her voice becoming firm. “You are not a sinner, and you do not kill indiscriminately.”

The girl was so afraid that her lashes were trembling.

Chu Changqing saw it clearly.

She wasn’t being sincere; she was merely terrified.

Chu Changqing didn’t want to play these games anymore. He knew he was a beast trapped in an abyss, beyond saving.

One day, he would become an uncontrollable demon, bringing about another storm of blood.

He didn’t care.

But… before that, he had to have this person. He had to protect her beneath his wings.

He could destroy everyone; he could let everyone hate him.

But he had to have her.

Even if he turned into a beast devoid of humanity, he wanted to protect her.

She had drunk his blood, which was equivalent to signing a blood-contract with the Immortal Bird. Even if he lost his mind, he wouldn’t let her be sacrificed.

Even if he became the most rotten root in the earth, he would entangle her, dragging her down into the depths with him.

Her heart, her plans, her justice, her dreams…

He would let her destroy it all, and then let her destroy him.

That sounded like a fine ending.

Chu Changqing’s voice softened. “Come down, Wanwan. I do not wish to say it a third time.”

Chang Wan closed her eyes. When she opened them, they were filled with resolve. She said, “If you won’t answer my questions properly, I won’t come down.”

“You aren’t a saint… but you are absolutely not as bad as you say you are.”

Chu Changqing: “Naive.”

Chang Wan’s pupils shrank. In the next moment, she had already fallen into a cold embrace.

“If you won’t come down, I will simply come up.”

Chang Wan’s body went slightly stiff. The youth’s chest was pressed against her; unlike his voice, it was scalding and tender.

“Come back with me,” Chu Changqing stroked her hair gently. “Stay with me forever, okay?”

He still held the broken sword, but he was very careful not to let it touch her.

Chang Wan pursed her lips, went silent for a moment, and then slowly said, “No.”

Chu Changqing acted as if he hadn’t heard her. He said lazily, “I will offer you the best things in this world. Anyone who has ever hurt you… I will not let them off…”

“I don’t want the best things in this world.”

“I want you to tell me why you did this.”

Chang Wan didn’t push him away. She simply turned to look at him. Her body was still shaking with fear, but the hand gripping his wrist was incredibly firm. She said word for word, “The person I want to stay with… I don’t ask that he be an unparalleled hero, nor do I ask that he be a perfectly kind and righteous man…”

Chu Changqing met her gaze, his blood-colored pupils narrowing slightly.

The girl’s light-hazel eyes were beautiful and clean, shimmering with a clear light and his reflection. “I only ask that he has a human heart—one that feels pain for his own actions.”

Chu Changqing’s pupils snapped shut.

“I won’t ask you why.” Chang Wan gripped his wrist harder, as if drawing courage from somewhere. “I only ask you: after you took up that blade, did you feel pain?”

He felt pain.

The youth in the book, driven to a dead end, had slaughtered the entire Qingfeng Sect in a frenzy of revenge. Afterward, he lived like a walking corpse, painful and indifferent.

During that dark era, to escape pursuit, he walked three thousand miles while covered in wounds, plagued daily by nightmares and unshakeable inner demons.

Unbearable pain.

Finally, he fell into the darkness and became an irredeemable demon.

“I felt nothing.” Chu Changqing stared at her, hearing his own cold voice. “I am already a beast beyond salvation.”

“To get what I want…”

“I will do anything.”

“Don’t…”

His lips were suddenly covered.

Chu Changqing’s eyes widened slightly, seemingly unable to comprehend why she would do this.

Chang Wan covered his lips, staring at his crimson eyes and the flickering light of hesitation within them. Suddenly, things clicked.

In this moment, she finally felt that the Chu Changqing before her overlapped slightly with the early-stage protagonist of Against the Gods.

In his eyes, there was also uncertainty.

Even if he hid it deeply.

She recalled a passage she had read a long, long time ago. Chu Changqing was being hunted by the “righteous” sects on the outside, while suffering internally from the guilt of the massacre he had committed during his Qi deviation.

[What is the difference between such a slaughter… and a beast?]

[…]

[Whatever… it’s already like this.]

[It doesn’t matter anymore…]

[Since my sins as a human are unforgivable, I might as well become an unrestrained beast.]

Chang Wan remembered when the author was updating those chapters—the days when the youth was massacring sects and wandering as a fugitive—her real-life orphanage had closed down. No one adopted her, so she had to rent a room and live on her own, dealing with a troublesome landlord, working part-time, and preparing for her high school entrance exams.

She was young, and no one wanted to hire her. But having left the orphanage early, she had to support herself.

So she took odd jobs, handed out flyers, sold things…

During those grueling days, she was in constant pain and confusion.

It was also during that time that, every night in her dreams, she was with that young, lonely boy. They comforted each other and made it through those painful times together.

She didn’t understand the pain caused by a mistake as irrevocable as his, but she understood his loneliness—the feeling of having no one to help.

She wanted to protect him.

Just like the strength she had learned during her own lonely, difficult times.

She wanted to protect that youth in the book who was lonely and in pain, and who eventually fell into the demonic path.

Chang Wan looked at his crimson eyes and said softly, “Not a beast.”

“The Chu Changqing in my eyes is a person.”

Chu Changqing’s pupils shrank.

Chang Wan gently hugged his neck and whispered, “The person I want to protect.”

Ever since she arrived in this world, she had always viewed him as that irredeemable, world-shaking Demon Lord.

But she had forgotten.

He was currently just a burgeoning youth.

A youth who constantly told her he liked her, who tried his best to protect her, and who—for the sake of her poison—willingly slit his wrist to feed her his blood.

Chu Changqing: “…Do you know what you are saying?”

Chang Wan: “I know.”

Chu Changqing: “Are you not afraid of me?”

Chang Wan’s lashes fluttered: “I am.”

Chu Changqing thought, As expected. A mocking smile touched his lips. “Since—”

“You deliberately made me afraid of you; how could I not be afraid?” Chang Wan said. “You could have hidden this from me. You knew I was afraid, yet you intentionally told me.”

She stared at him and reached out, pressing her hand over his heart.

Through the thin fabric and the heat of his chest, she felt that beating heart.

“But it doesn’t matter.”

Chang Wan said, “You showed these things to me because you feel this matter… is terrifying.”

“So you yourself… must also be afraid.”