Her Smile Was Sweet Enough to Ruin Me

After finishing my conversation with the idiot, I went back inside. A full table of dishes had already been set.

Seeing the idiot already stuffing his face, I gave him a look.

“You could’ve at least waited for me…”

“You’re too slow, bro. ‘Bad thoughts come from eating slow,’ as they say.”

“Hah…”

“Sighing lets happiness slip away, Darling.”

Yi Yi had also taken off her apron. She came over to me.

“Come on, wash your hands. Let’s eat together.”

“Yeah. Okay.”

Dinner was just me and the idiot chatting and eating. Mostly useless banter.

This was pretty much how it always was when he came over.

Today, with Yi Yi there, nothing changed. She didn’t say a word. She just maintained her ladylike posture.

Was she being more reserved because the idiot was there?

Fortunately, dinner ended quickly. The idiot, full and satisfied, patted his belly.

“I’m stuffed! Wow, your cooking is amazing. Not one bit worse than my family’s professional chef!”

“Hehe, you flatter me.”

While handing our spotless bowls to Yi Yi, I said to the idiot, who was lying spread-eagle on the floor,

“You… finish eating, now get lost.”

“Hey, kicking me out already? I’m your matchmaker, you know. Shouldn’t you thank me?”

True.

Without the idiot’s help, Yi Yi wouldn’t be here.

I really should thank him.

But the guy is filthy rich and lacks nothing. I have no idea what to give him.

And he was probably just saying that. He never expects anything in return when he helps me.

If I ask him for help, he’ll do it unconditionally.

Even if I killed someone, he’d handle the aftermath and cover it up.

Why? Because…

“I’m truly grateful to Mr. Idiot for his help.”

Cough!

“Uh, Mr. Idiot…”

Watching the idiot’s twitching lips, unsure of what expression to make, I burst out laughing.

“Pfft… Hahahahaha!”

Yi Yi actually called him “Mr. Idiot” to his face!

But she immediately realized the term might be inappropriate. She covered her mouth.

“Ah, was that rude? I’m sorry. If you mind, I’ll call you Mr. Li Enhe…”

“No, my bro calls me idiot all the time. I don’t mind if you do too. It’s just… ‘Mr. Idiot’ doesn’t sound very cool.”

He rubbed his chin, thought for a moment, then snapped his fingers.

“I got it! From now on, call me Mr. 2! That sounds way cooler!”

“You mean the okama?”

“Haha, isn’t that role fitting for me, bro?”

“Hoh…”

Indeed, Mr. 2 is a loyal character. A good brother who would die for his friends.

“Okay. I’ll remember. Mr. 2.”

Yi Yi, ever serious, immediately changed her address.

The idiot even struck a ballet pose, looking proud. Ugh…

“Don’t indulge him, Yi Yi. Just keep calling him Mr. Idiot. It’s fine.”

“Yeah, call me whatever. I don’t mind. Though my bro is the only one who calls me idiot to my face.”

“I see… Then I’ll just call you by your name.”

The idiot raised his hands in surrender and gave a businesslike smile.

“OK, OK. Whatever works. Alright, I’ll stop being a third wheel. I’ve freeloaded a meal. Time to go.”

Huh? What’s this? Suddenly switching from his usual goofy mode to his serious, business mode.

He never uses that mode at my place.

Then the idiot bid us farewell with impeccable politeness and headed out. Yi Yi didn’t notice anything wrong, but I sensed something. I turned to her.

“Yi Yi, I’ll see him out. I’ll be right back.”

“Okay, Darling.”

After I stepped out, I saw the idiot lighting a cigarette on the balcony.

I walked over and patted his shoulder.

“What’s up?”

“Nothing… But I should apologize in advance, bro. I really can’t get along with her.”

“I noticed. It’s not your fault.”

Honestly, I was beginning to understand what Sister Ling meant by “you’re the same.”

Yi Yi sees the idiot only as a benefactor, not a friend.

Or rather, Yi Yi’s attitude toward anyone other than me is the same.

Like the idiot’s business mode. Very polite.

But it actually sends a message of: ‘Don’t try to get close to me. Let’s keep this distance.’

For his part, the idiot actually wanted to get along with her. As my girlfriend, even when she called him ‘Mr. Idiot,’ he didn’t get angry. He joked that she could call him anything.

If anyone else called him that… they’d better be prepared to be toyed with.

“I don’t mind. Her not seeing me as important isn’t a big deal. But her only seeing you… that’s a bit serious, bro. I think you know how yanderes are made.”

“Yi Yi has a bit of a tendency, since I’m the only one she can depend on. But it’s not that serious.”

“Is that so… Whew…”

He blew smoke outside, finished his cigarette in one go, and stubbed it out.

“But I really admire you, bro. What exactly did you say to make Shen Kaori so devoted in such a short time? Are you really a reincarnated Casanova?”

“Just my sincere feelings. Honesty. No regrets.”

And meeting her at the right time.

“So that’s Ming Qi’s ‘secret technique’?”

“It’s not that deep. I’m just a psychology amateur.”

“I’m just worried you’ll use that ‘amateur theory’ to get into woman after woman’s heart.”

“Damn. You’ve been really strange lately. What makes you think a shut-in like me has any luck with women?”

“I told you before. If I were a woman, I’d fall for you too. That’s all.”

“f*ck. Is that supposed to be a reason?”

“Of course. Because I’m a man, we’re brothers. If I were a woman, you’d still be single.”

“Uh, don’t make such gross assumptions.”

“Bro, my orientation is normal. You don’t have to worry about your behind.”

He tossed the cigarette butt aside and started walking downstairs.

I followed.

“I get what you’re saying. But you know my personality. I only helped Yi Yi because she’s exactly my type.”

“Then did you help me because I seemed like your type for a brother?”

“Well…”

“No. When we first met, you kind of hated me, didn’t you?”

True. Back then, I thought he was just a playboy rich kid. Women always changing. I never considered being his friend.

It was just coincidence…

Why did I save him back then?

It definitely wasn’t for his sake. I just… thought the situation sucked.

“I know. You just happened to find my situation annoying. You helped me because it made you feel better.”

“Yeah. I’m not a good person.”

“I know. I’m not a good person either.”

Yeah. “Good” has nothing to do with me or the idiot.

We’re both the type to do whatever is necessary.

The idiot might be slightly better, but I really have no reservations.

“Besides, good people aren’t necessarily popular. If they were, ‘nice guy’ wouldn’t be a joke. And ‘nice guys finish last’ wouldn’t be a thing.”

He walked out of the building and turned back with a casual smile.

“It’s not about good or bad, bro. You just have a natural charm. Like charisma.”

He held out his fist.

“So, in the next life, I’d still be your bro.”

“What’s with the sudden sappy lines? What is this, some tragic scene? And that’s a death flag, you know.”

But I still bumped my fist against his.

He laughed brightly.

“Haha. Your retorts are as sharp as ever.”

He pulled out a key and tossed it to me.

“I bought a place today. That building across the street. Room 502.”

I fished out my keyring and started adding the key.

“Fast as always, rich boy.”

“I got lucky. That unit was already on the market.”

“Nice. So you just threw money at it?”

“Not really. I was prepared to pay a premium. But strangely, the seller didn’t haggle. Sold it at original price.”

“Wouldn’t a used place be cheaper?”

“You don’t understand the market. Properties in this area only appreciate. The one I bought should be worth three times the original price now.”

“Huh? Then why’d they sell it to you at original price?”

“Who knows. Maybe they didn’t recognize me and want a favor. I keep a low profile in rich kid circles.”

“Hanging out with a shut-in like me, you’d be famous if anything.”

“Haha. So the low price either means something bad happened there, someone died, or they needed cash fast.”

“Damn, and you still bought it? What if it’s haunted?”

“I believe in Marx.”

“Stupid materialist.”

“Like you’re any different? I’ve never seen you pray.”

“I figured out a long time ago that praying won’t bring anyone to save me.”

“Is that so? But you saved me. And now Shen Kaori.”

“Just a whim.”

“I’m afraid you’ll have these whims often.”

“I’m a serious observer. I don’t like to meddle.”

“There’s a saying: ‘Things happen beyond our control.'”

“Tch. Enough already. I don’t know why you’re so worried. Get lost.”

“You don’t have to kick me out. You won’t have to call me over anymore. I’ll be in that building across the street.”

“Same time?”

“Yeah. And I set up your equipment for you. You’re not going to refuse this time, are you? I assume you don’t want to draw lewd pics in front of your girlfriend.”

“Good bro! You’re a lifesaver!”

“Heh. Alright. Keep in touch on the phone.”

“Over.”

He waved and walked toward his car.

I have to admit, the idiot thinks of everything.

From now on, when I need to draw, I’ll go to that building.

I don’t know how long I can hide it, but I’ll hide it as long as I can.

I really don’t want Yi Yi to know her boyfriend draws lewd pictures.

It’s a matter of pride!

But this is only a temporary solution…

Seriously, maybe I should find a proper, respectable job…

Sigh. This sucks.