Chapter 22: Collaboration is ‘murder’ to me

“Can’t I go with you?”

“Well, school is starting soon, and I have broadcasts too.”

One thing I realized after spending five days with my sister was that she turned out to be an extreme siscon. To the

extent that I couldn’t understand why she had avoided me before.

She claims to have various reasons, but I don’t really get it. She even watched my first live broadcast and joined the

membership as an Izutomo. Plus, it turns out that the ‘Blank’ who sent that silent 50,000 yen red hyper chat during

my monetization unlock stream was actually my sister.

Wait a second. That’s kind of scary.

Come to think of it, doesn’t that mean she’s seen all the crazy things I’ve done during my broadcasts?

Haha, how pathetic—I just want to crawl under a rock and die…

“You just need to come back before school starts, and you can do the broadcast on my computer at home.”

“Well, that’s true, but…”

Apparently, the time she made ribeye steak was also because she overheard me casually mention it during a game on stream.

…Looks like I have even more reason to be careful with what I say during broadcasts from now on.

Not that it’s something I can control just because I want to.

“Jia, Mina must have her own personal reasons too, so don’t push her too much. Like, say, a friend?”

“…”

At least, none of the reasons have anything to do with friends. My sister knows that, so she can’t say anything either. Actually, Mom knows too.

Huh? Why am I tearing up?

“…Okay. I probably won’t be able to visit for a while because I’ll be busy, but I’ll try to come back as soon as I can.”

“Alright. Come back soon.”

“Ha-have a safe trip.”

“Yeah.”

“Eek?!”

As if it were the most natural thing, my sister hugged me tightly with a smile.

“…I really want to take you with me.”

Huh, maybe going with her wouldn’t be so bad after all? If I can feel this softness every day, then…

I’m sure the Izutomos would understand, right?

“Enough with the hugs and get going! Mina, don’t indulge your sister’s clinginess too much!”

“Okay.”

“Yes…”

Today, August 24th, is a bit of a special day.

Because there’s exactly one week left of summer vacation.

Don’t you all feel the same?

When there’s only a week left of vacation, you start feeling rushed to do all the things you’ve been putting off and you

want to make some last-minute memories because, hey, it’s summer break.

So, I made a decision too.

Let’s use the magic of this last week of summer vacation to take on a challenge that I might never get to do otherwise.

[Kaino Izumi: Koga-chan, can we do a collab today?]

[Koga Suzuha: Let’s do it ☆ (o* •w)]

Koga-chan’s reply came back in less than five seconds after I sent the DM.

…Whoa, that’s kind of scary.

There was a reason I reached out to Koga-chan for a collab first. Ever since we officially became friends, Koga-chan

often suggested that we collab again, but I kept making excuses to avoid it.

But with the magic of this one week left of summer vacation, I thought it might be easy enough to finally do a collab

with Koga-chan. So, I suggested it.

[It’s been a while since we chatted like this as friends, huh? Right?]

“Y-yeah.”

[But we still talk almost every day, so it’s not that bad.]

Is it really okay to call that talking, though?

C-could it be that I’m subconsciously replying to Koga-chan without even realizing it?

With that in mind, I checked our DMs.

[August 21st]

[Koga Suzuha: Izumi, do you have any favorite snacks?]

[Kaino Izumi: I like things like chocolate.]

[Koga Suzuha: I especially love shortcake. There’s a specialty shop in front of my house…]

[August 22nd]

[Koga Suzuha: I suddenly craved yakisoba last night, so…]

[Kaino Izumi: Yeah.]

[Koga Suzuha: So, I went back to that shop I visited a while ago, but the taste felt different somehow…]

[August 23rd]

[Koga Suzuha: You know Yukari, right? She mentioned me on her stream today…]

[Koga Suzuha: So after the stream, I got curious.]

[Kaino Izumi: Is that so.]

・Is this really a conversation?

No, I mean, I’m talking too, so I guess it is?

I’m just on the listening side.

[So? Why did you suddenly bring up the collab today?]

“Well, um, since, s-school’s almost over, and I won’t have much time to stream anymore, so I thought it’d be good to do one now…”

[Izumi, you’re regretting bringing up the collab right now, aren’t you?]

…How did she know?

Using the magic of the last week of summer vacation to suggest a collab with Koga-chan was more recklessness than courage, and I’m feeling that in real-time.

As expected, chatting and talking directly are worlds apart in terms of energy drain.

It’s been less than five minutes since the call started, and I already feel exhausted…

I’m getting overwhelmed by Koga-chan’s social energy.

[Hmm. Well, as long as you’re not feeling overwhelmed, it’s fine, right?]

“Yes…”

Koga-chan genuinely seemed happy that I suggested the collab this time.

Knowing she’s friendly with all her peers and seniors, I always thought her casual collab suggestions were just small talk.

But then again, Koga-chan is my one and only precious friend, so there’s no way she’d say something she didn’t mean to me.

Koga-chan really is an angel… KMT…

[So, do you have a plan or anything in mind?]

“Uh, um, for now…”

Of course, I didn’t suggest a collab with Koga-chan without any thought.

I slowly explained my plan, and Koga-chan agreed, saying it seemed like a good idea.

Maybe I’ve made some progress after all?

[[Chatter] I think today’s me has grown just a little more than yesterday! #KainoIzumi #StarsFlowy

“So, as I mentioned in yesterday’s teaser on Nater, today, I’ll be doing a little reading of Ma, Maicarong.”

-May-chan’s Maicarong? Ugh, my head…

-Starting off feeling anxious lol

-Wasn’t the last Maicarong basically a yuri declaration?

-Has May-chan really grown? (→)

“S-shut up! I’m starting now!”

[Hi Izumi!]

[Besides watching streams, what’s your favorite hobby?]

“Well, maybe, um, drawing? If I get the ch-chance, I’m thinking of doing a drawing stream too.”

Drawing has always been my hobby, both in my past life and now.

When things get tough or exhausting, just fiddling with my tablet helps soothe my mind.

“Next!”

[What color are your panties today?]

“…So it’s finally come to this, huh?”

I wasn’t particularly surprised because I somewhat expected a question like this.

This kind of question is common in this industry, and even I have asked it anonymously to other VTubers, excluding Natchan.

Well, it’s not like I mind answering, but knowing the intent behind it makes me not want to.

They just want to see me flustered by their lewd questions, right?

Sorry, but I may not have seen it all, but mentally, I’m still a 40-year-old adult.

“Do you all really want to know what color my panties are?”

-A little?

-Of course!

“Even though you always call me a roleplay trash, antisocial, awkward, or shady, you still want to know the color of my p-panties?”

-Yup!

-That’s what makes it even better.

Maybe that’s true…

No, wait. I shouldn’t be convinced by this.

“B-but I’m not going to tell you… How about you guys start talking about your underwear instead…!”

-For real?

-Today I’m wearing slightly naughty white lucky underwear!

-Blue boxers.

-Passionate red, maybe?

“H-hey! Stop! I’m sorry, so please stop!”

I thought the Izutomos would be mad, but the chat quickly turned into a competition of who could brag about their underwear…

What? Are all the Izutomos like this?

Even the women are talking about slightly naughty white lucky underwear.

Why on earth are you wearing that while watching my stream?

If even the female Izutomos are like this, I’m feeling a bit heartbroken…

-So, what color are May-chan’s panties?

“I-I’m not telling! Next!”

[Hi Izumi!]

[I heard your estranged sister who used to live on her own recently moved back home. Are things still awkward between you two?]

“Ah, yeah, that did come up before.”

I’m not sure how much of this I should be talking about.

Should I mention that my sister turned out to be a huge siscon?

Besides, my sister is probably watching this stream too, right?

So I should keep it brief, huh?

“Um, somehow, things worked out. We ate some good food together too…”

-Maybe May-chan thinks things worked out, but your sister doesn’t?
-It’s possible, coming from May-chan lol

“No way! N-next!”

[Every time you stream, you always play up being antisocial and having communication issues, while your other peers do frequent collabs, and you’re always by yourself. Are you even motivated to stream?]
[If that’s the case, why not consider graduating?]

“Hmm.”

…No matter how many times I read it, it’s a painful blow straight to the heart.

But isn’t it weird for someone who’s antisocial and has communication issues to do frequent collabs…?

Of course, I know this sounds like an excuse.

I understand what this person wants to say too.

They’re basically saying I have no talent for streaming, right?

Indeed, human malice is scary.

Even if it’s from someone whose face and personality I don’t know, the fact that they view me poorly tightens around

my mind.

It’s no surprise, but this wasn’t the first time I’d seen something like this.

Just by ego-surfing on the community, I’d come across plenty of comments like this.

But those were simply people freely voicing whatever they wanted on a forum.

However, this message left on Maicarong was like a curse filled with malice meant to hurt me when I read it.

Just reading it is frightening and painful—a curse of sorts.

Honestly, I cried a little when I first saw it.

It felt terrible, like my self-esteem, which was already rock bottom, was being stomped on.

And I started wondering if I should graduate, just like the message said…

Huh? When I think about it, isn’t that something I ponder almost every day anyway?

Then there’s no need to feel hurt over this, right?

It’s true I don’t do collabs because I’m antisocial and have communication issues, and I already think about

graduating every day.

I see.
You wrote this message to enlighten me—you’re just another part of myself…
Thank you!

-May-chan, are you okay?
-You don’t have to read these things.

“Ah, I’ve grown once again….”

-?
-What are you talking about?
-Sometimes, May-chan scares me.

It’s fine. I’m scared of myself too.

“A-anyway! In the end, what this person is trying to say is, ‘Please do more collabs, May-chan!’ R-right?”

-How in the world did you interpret it that way?
-The king of positivity lolol

“So, I’ve prepared something! A surprise collab! Our guest is K-Koga-chan!”

[Suzuha-i~! I’m Koga Suzuha from StarsFlow, the angel who wants everyone’s praise!]

-?
-Seriously?
-SuzuIzu exists…!