A Kindness That Sits Wrong

“Why aren’t you eating.”

“Does it not suit your taste.”

“No.”

“It’s not that….”

“Then what.”

“Are you feeling sick.”

Ju Hayan had already set her chopsticks down.

She stared blankly at the lunch box she had not even half finished.

There was still food in her mouth.

She could not bring herself to chew.

It was unavoidable.

In front of any talk about her father, Ju Hayan was always the weaker one.

“Ah.”

“I didn’t mean anything by it.”

“Don’t worry about it.”

He said it lightly.

By then, Ju Hayan could no longer hear him.

Shin I-hyeok had come to see her because of the debt.

Yet he rarely spoke about her father.

Even when he asked about his whereabouts, he never seemed particularly interested in the answer.

She had thought that was the case.

But maybe that had been her misunderstanding.

Come to think of it, indifference would have been stranger.

“…….”

She deliberately buried any thoughts related to her father.

There were no good memories to recall.

It was a relationship she had never been able to choose.

It produced consequences regardless of her will.

She did not want to add emotional burden to her already heavy daily life.

In truth, there was no way Ju Hayan was not struggling.

She was still at an age where she needed the shelter of family.

Even if he behaved kindly, facing a creditor every week could not be easy.

“Hm….”

“…….”

“Hayan.”

Ju Hayan, who had not lifted her head from her sinking thoughts, flinched at the sigh so close to her.

At some point, Shin I-hyeok had walked over to the table where she sat.

Only then did she realize he had been watching her for quite a while.

“I’m sorry.”

“I was thinking about something….”

“Could you say that again.”

“It’s late.”

“I was thinking I should get going.”

“Ah.”

Ju Hayan flustered at his words.

She braced her hands on the floor, about to stand.

A hand came down on her shoulder and pressed her gently back.

Shin I-hyeok wore a bitter expression.

His furrowed gaze hovered near her face before dropping away.

“Even for me, this feels a bit wrong.”

“……?”

She did not understand what he meant.

As she looked up at him in confusion, Shin I-hyeok reached out and ruffled her hair.

He smoothed it down again, as if brushing it, then withdrew his hand.

“I’ll head out now.”

“Eat comfortably.”

“…….”

“And it’s cold outside.”

“Come straight in when you get home.”

With that, Shin I-hyeok rose without hesitation.

Ju Hayan’s eyes widened.

She did not even get a chance to explain anything.

By the time she hurriedly swallowed the food in her mouth, he was already halfway past the doorway.

“Don’t get up.”

“You’ll get indigestion.”

Then Ju Hayan was left alone in the house.

She looked toward the brightly lit entryway, now empty of people.

Only after the orange light turned off did she straighten her body.

Thud.

When she leaned her upper body back against the sink, the loose cabinet door rattled.

Lee Jonghun noticed something was wrong with Ju Hayan right after the bell rang for second period.

Falling asleep face-down during movie time or self-study was common enough.

So when Ju Hayan collapsed onto her desk right after homeroom and did not get up, he assumed she was just short on sleep from staying up late.

Still, not moving at all for over an hour was strange.

When Lee Jonghun finally grabbed her shoulder and shook her, a groan leaked out from beneath her bowed head.

He made a fuss, asking if she was sick.

He was so loud that even the student in front turned around.

Ju Hayan barely lifted her pale face before clamping a hand over Lee Jonghun’s mouth.

“What grade.”

“What class.”

Getting permission to go to the nurse’s office was easy, since they were barely doing anything resembling a lesson.

When Lee Jonghun raised his hand with Ju Hayan still covering his mouth and said they were going to the nurse’s office, the teacher waved dismissively.

“Third year.”

“Class two.”

“Ju Hayan.”

Ju Hayan answered while sitting on a backless swivel chair.

Pressing at the aching pit of her stomach, she said she thought she had indigestion.

The nurse handed her liquid digestive medicine and pills.

She planned to take the medicine and go back to sleep at her desk.

Just as she bowed and tried to stand, Lee Jonghun pushed her back down.

When he asked if she could lie on a bed instead, the nurse, knowing she was a senior, nodded and pulled out the attendance clipboard.

“Did you get indigestion.”

“Did you eat something expired.”

“It’s not like that.”

“Then why indigestion all of a sudden.”

“You’re usually healthy.”

“This is the first time in three years I’ve seen you in the nurse’s office.”

“I just ate too fast.”

“I think it got stuck halfway.”

“It’s nothing.”

Lying flat made her chest feel tight, so Ju Hayan curled her body onto her side.

She looked wearily at Lee Jonghun, who sat by the bed chattering nonstop.

Please go away.

“You seemed like you were eating well lately.”

“Why are you groaning again.”

That’s exactly my point.

Ju Hayan could not smooth the frown on her face.

Her appetite, which had dropped sharply because Shin I-hyeok had been irritable the night before, never came back.

After he left first and she was alone at home, she had picked at the remaining food.

In the end, she dumped the lunch box straight into the sink.

Normally, she would have forced it down out of sheer wastefulness.

And yet the result was acute indigestion.

It felt unfair.

“Sulking over nothing.”

She muttered sulkily, lips jutting out.

She would never say it in front of him.

But it was not entirely wrong.

Who would enjoy being around a creditor.

And in the end, she had gone home anyway.

“What.”

“Huh.”

“You just said something.”

“No.”

“I didn’t say anything.”

“That’s not true.”

“I definitely heard something.”

Seriously.

Why was he only sharp about useless things.

Ju Hayan feigned innocence and stared back at Lee Jonghun, who was still tilting his head beside the bed.

“Aren’t you leaving.”

“Me.”

“Where would I go.”

“Where else.”

“The classroom.”

“I’m sick, so I’m staying here.”

“You go back.”

“You’re not even sick.”

“There’s nothing to do in class anyway.”

“I’m tired of movies.”

“More importantly, move over a bit.”

Shaking his head, Lee Jonghun stood up and shoved Ju Hayan toward the edge of the bed.

So that had been his plan all along.

Resisting was pointless.

Lee Jonghun, a physical-education applicant, was too strong.

“Seriously.”

“It’s cramped.”

“Get down.”

“No.”

“Hey, there’s enough space.”

“Look.”

“There’s even room left.”

“We can lie down side by side.”

Ju Hayan stared in disbelief as Lee Jonghun climbed onto the bed and started shouting.

He lay there just barely not falling off the single bed, grinning like an idiot.

Seeing that killed her will to argue.

“You happy.”

“Stealing a sick person’s spot.”

“I didn’t steal anything.”

“You still have space.”

“I’m about to fall off.”

“Hey.”

“Shh.”

“Be quiet.”

“If you’re loud, we’ll both get kicked out.”

So that had been the plan from the start.

Bastard.

No wonder he had insisted on coming to the nurse’s office together.

“Who told you to eat weird stuff.”

“I said it wasn’t weird.”

I’m aging.

Seriously aging.

Why was the one friend she had determined to add to her stress.

She had planned to sleep comfortably for an hour.

That was ruined.

Grumbling internally, she turned onto her side.

Better to stare at the precarious view than look at his face.

That lasted less than five minutes.

She suddenly flipped over again.

This time, she chose to sit up on the bed to avoid him entirely.

“Hey.You’re not going to sleep.”

“Huh.”

“No.”

“I am.”

“Then don’t sleep.”

“Listen to me for a second.”

Then why did you even ask.

Ju Hayan glared at Lee Jonghun, who was looking up at her with his head propped on his arm.

“Say there’s someone you don’t like.”

“But they keep taking care of you.”

“What would you do.”

“Easy win.”

“I’d take it.”

“But what if it’s someone you dislike so much it makes you uncomfortable.”

“Who said they like you.”

“What are you saying.”

“That’s not it.”

Lee Jonghun looked unfazed even as she glared at him.

Trying to be logical, he gestured vaguely in the air.

“But it’s true.”

“Why would someone go out of their way to take care of you.”

“There’s gotta be something going on.”

That was only true in normal situations.

With Shin I-hyeok, it was closer to helping the unfortunate.

But when she thought about the relationship between the three of them, including her father, it did not feel like pure kindness either.

It frustrated her that she could not explain the situation properly.

“Anyway.”

“Don’t assume reasons.”

“Think of a way to deal with it.”

“Deal with what.”

“If it’s free, just say thanks and take it.”

“That’s exactly why I’m stuck like this.”

“Then why the hell are you asking.”

“Do whatever you want.”

“You idiot.”

In the end, Lee Jonghun shouted and turned his back to her.

Only then did Ju Hayan realize her mistake.

She hurriedly grabbed his shoulder and shook him.

Internally, she clicked her tongue at how petty he was for his size.

When she sincerely apologized and patted his arm, his stubbornness did not last long.

He still acted sulky, but he curled his large body back toward her.

Ju Hayan had to hold back a laugh.

“If it bothers you that much, just reject it outright.”

“That’s the problem.”

“I can’t.”

“Then what kind of relationship is it.”

Equally frustrated, Lee Jonghun complained before burying his head into the pillow.

Seeing that Ju Hayan had no intention of explaining further, he gave up.

Bad bastard.

“If receiving things makes you uncomfortable, then buy something for them too.”

“Me.”

“Yeah.”

“Give something back and make it clear.”

“Say, ‘Look, I dress myself fine, I eat fine.’”

“‘Your concern is a no-thank-you.’”

“Wouldn’t that be rude.”

“I’m not saying literally say it.”

“Just give off that vibe.”

“Did you waste all your studying.”

After all, you’ve been receiving things this whole time.

Ignoring it outright felt wrong.

A gift in return.

Firm and clear.

Ju Hayan rolled her eyes thoughtfully at his words.

It actually sounded like a decent idea.

If her relationship with Shin I-hyeok turned negative, she was the one who would lose.

If she could also feel at ease, even better.

After a moment of silence, Ju Hayan picked up the blanket at her feet and draped it over Lee Jonghun’s shoulders.

Sleep.

Sleep comfortably.

You earned your keep.

Instead of words, she patted his shoulder.

Lee Jonghun, unaware of her thoughts, rubbed his arms as if creeped out by her sudden kindness.