Confronting the Past

“You were already gone by yourself, what was I supposed to stay there for?”
It was an unexpected answer.
“For someone like that, the three of you seemed to be having plenty of fun.”
“Did we…”
“And Evelyn seemed to be completely smitten with you.”
Suddenly, Theron’s brow furrowed.
“Why such a choice of words?”
“What?”
“You say that, and it sounds like your cousin has a crush on me.”
“If neither of you were seeing someone, maybe it would have been so.”
“Don’t talk nonsense.”
Theron said firmly.
Even at his dismissive words, Selene felt the annoying feeling she had been experiencing all day revive now that Theron was so close.
A rather sharp voice came from Selene.
“It’s a fact that you have a lot of experience with women. From the looks of it, you seem to know actors through and through.”
“…No.”
“And you go to play poker. Women are not absent from such places, are they?”
Even as she spoke, Selene did not know what kind of answer she wanted to hear from Theron.
As if she were the one who was drunk, she was attacking Theron aimlessly.
However, Theron did not panic and had a serious face.
“If my past bothers you, I can apologize as much as you want, but don’t speak as if you doubt my present self. If I could, I would want to show you my heart.”
“…”
“I know you still don’t trust me, but I really only have you. No matter how pretty a woman is, even if she’s naked, I only get hard for you, who is fully clothed.”
Selene’s eyebrow twitched.
“Do you have to use that as a metaphor?”
“I know the metaphor is not romantic. But what can I do when it’s true? I’ve become an impotent man who can’t even get it up without you.”
As Theron had said, this was not romantic at all.
But perhaps because the other person was Theron Cox, Selene felt her sharp heart soften.
In fact, Theron had not even given a single glance at Evelyn’s radical swimsuit.
Selene’s gaze, which had lost its thorns, became much calmer.
“…I wasn’t doubting you. I was just in a bad mood.”
“Why? You enjoyed the swim today. And Miss Evelyn wasn’t uncomfortable with me.”
Miss Evelyn.
As her heart was softening, that word got stuck in Selene’s ear.
And at the same time, she seemed to have thought for a moment.
‘Should I confess this strange symptom of being sensitive to the address ‘Miss Evelyn’ to Theron?’
Her hesitation did not last long.
‘Since Theron also said he was curious about me.’
‘Sharing such private feelings and psychological states can also be called getting to know each other.’
Selene, who had taken a deep breath, finally let out her voice.
“To be honest, ‘Miss Evelyn’, that word bothers me.”
“…”
“It’s closer to being in a bad mood.”
Theron did not react immediately.
Rather, he stared at Selene with a slight frown, as if he didn’t understand.
“Why is that…? I’m just calling your cousin.”
“Yes. It’s just calling Evelyn. But it sounds too familiar. It’s also a title that doesn’t suit your relationship with Evelyn. Practically, the two of you are not on good terms.”
“Wait, wait.”
Theron seemed to need time to understand Selene.
“So… you mean I’m calling your cousin too familiarly?”
“That’s right.”
“So I should call her Lady or Lady Ashcombe, not Miss Evelyn.”
“That sounds too formal. Miss Ashcombe is enough.”
Even though she had kindly given him the answer, Theron had a dazed face for a moment.
Then he touched his lips and asked stealthily.
“Selene… I’m asking because I can’t believe it. Are you jealous by any chance?”
Selene was just as surprised by the word ‘jealousy’.
“…No.”
“What do you mean, no? You’re saying it’s unpleasant that I’m calling your cousin affectionately. And the same goes for you bringing up my past relationships with women since a while ago.”
“Don’t talk nonsense, Theron Cox.”
Selene scolded coldly, feeling as if she were suffocating for some reason.
However, Theron’s arrogant lips were already slowly rising.
“Why don’t you be a little more honest?”
“Don’t say strange things.”
“What’s so strange about what I’m saying? I’m jealous of the things that are by your side all the time.”
Selene felt the illusion of her face getting hot.
It was even more so because Theron Cox was smiling and looking at her.
It felt like being caught by her parents for the mistake of spilling a glass of water when she was a child.
“Forget it. If you don’t want to admit it, you don’t have to. I don’t intend to make you uncomfortable or ashamed.”
Theron belatedly made a neat face, cleared his throat, and controlled the corners of his mouth.
“But as I said, I only have Selene Ashcombe. So why don’t you let me call her Miss Evelyn? It would be strange to call her Miss Ashcombe so stiffly now.”
“Do as you please.”
Selene didn’t care anymore.
Whether Theron called Evelyn Miss Evelyn or Lady Ashcombe.
Even at her indifferent permission, Theron smiled slyly and moved his body closer to Selene.
“But Selene. Your lips have been looking so red since a while ago, can I kiss them?”
‘What kind of logic is it to kiss someone because their lips are red?’
“No. Get away.”
“Let me do it in celebration of your jealousy.”
“If you keep talking nonsense, I’ll kick you out.”
“That means I can stay in this room for a while.”
At Selene’s firm warning, Theron obediently moved away.
And yet, the way he was smiling to himself just seemed to be in a good mood.
At that sight of Theron, Selene’s heart fluttered weakly.
The atmosphere, which had been stiff for a moment, had softened as if it had never been.
Although she felt a little embarrassed, that was only for a moment, and since the misunderstanding had been cleared up.
So, Selene thought of talking about what she had been putting off.
“Theron Cox. You said you were curious about me, right?”
At her rather serious voice, Theron, who had been grinning foolishly, gradually stopped smiling.
“I did.”
“The same goes for me. I still think we don’t know each other well. Although you recently confessed your childhood, that’s just a part of it.”
“Well… to know every corner of the days we’ve lived, it’s a bit…”
“So, I was thinking, how about we get to know each other before I go to study abroad?”
“In what way…?”
“It’s fine through conversation like this, and it’s also fine to go to a place with memories together.”
Selene had also thought quite deeply about that method.
What would be a good way to get to know each other well in a short period of time.
It seemed that even if it was a rather stiff method, there was nothing as efficient as conversation.
Of course, it wasn’t that she was going to sit face to face and have a deep question and answer session.
She wanted to get to know him through natural conversation in various places.
And visiting a place with each other’s memories would allow them to experience the atmosphere or emotions that cannot be felt through conversation more directly.
“I’d like that, but there’s something I want to ask first.”
Theron suddenly looked at Selene with a serious face.
“The fact that you want to get to know me, is it just an extension of watching me?”
It was a difficult question.
Selene needed a moment.
“Yes, Theron. To put it simply, yes. But there are many meanings to ‘watching’. I need to know how different you and I are and to what extent that difference is to be able to come to a conclusion.”
‘Me, who had been clinging only to the piano. Theron, for whom money was the most important value.’
‘The values and ways of life that she had thought didn’t matter had become a problem one by one.’
‘Nevertheless, Selene was closer to thinking it didn’t matter, but since she was going to watch Theron one last time, she was going to approach it seriously.’
“That means your feelings might turn negative if our lives have been too different.”
A shadow was cast on Theron’s face.
Selene noticed without difficulty what Theron was thinking.
“I already know that you and I grew up in completely different environments. But ‘getting to know’ is closer to predicting whether we can overcome that difference.”
“…”
“So, show me your true self, Theron. So that I can feel you completely.”
If Theron were to try to hide himself again with this conversation, their relationship would end here.
‘Just like before, we would just be looking at each other superficially and would not be able to deeply understand each other’s emotions and pain.’
“Phew, I think I’m sobering up.”
Theron tried to sound cheerful as if to endure that pressure.
“Tell me, Selene. I’ll answer anything.”
Soon, Theron seemed to be accepting the purpose of this awkward conversation.
He must have known.
That it was a process he had to go through, even if he was scared right now.
Selene immediately threw out the question she had been postponing.
“I’m curious why you can’t go in the water.”
“Ah…”
She was worried that Theron might have an unpleasant face at this question, but he just rubbed the back of his neck with an awkward expression.
“It’s nothing much. I think I’ve told you before, but my father tried to drown me in the bathtub when I was young. Since that day, I can’t go into deep water.”
Although he started by saying it was nothing much, Theron’s story was quite a big deal.
Selene’s heart immediately became heavy.