A Sanctuary from the Absurd

We didn’t say a word for a long while. I was busy scratching the back of my hand, which still felt scorched, when Michael spoke up.

“……Well? Do you know how it feels now?”

I nodded slowly.

“Do you hate it?”

“No. Quite the opposite, actually,” I replied, looking back up at him. Michael’s face was just as flushed as mine. He leaned down and pressed his lips to my cheek.

“I’m glad.”

“…….”

“Then… shall we head off soon?”

I reflexively grabbed the hem of his shirt.

“Um, hey.”

“Yeah?”

Could I really say this? Would I look too easy? No, I didn’t care about looking easy—I was more worried Michael would find me clingy. But I couldn’t stall any longer, so I decided to just go for it. I whispered in a tiny voice:

“I have a class this afternoon with a professor I really, really dislike.”

“Yeah, I know. And?”

“……The thing is,” I said, bowing my head deeply, “I think if we do that one more time, I’ll be able to go into class in a good mood.”

“Ah.”

Michael took my hand gently again. Is he going for the back of my hand again? Just as the thought crossed my mind, Michael’s eyes crinkled into a mischievous crescent.

“You hate cliché things, don’t you, Cecil?”

“It’s not that I hate them…. Uh, how do I put this?” I started rambling. “I think I just hate them right now. Not that I’m saying don’t do it to my hand. I mean, anywhere is fine, really….”

Michael’s face slowly drew closer. This time, I couldn’t bring myself to close my eyes. I stood there as stiff as a wooden board, while Michael moved as fluidly as water. I knew I should move naturally too, but my body simply wouldn’t cooperate.

However, the moment Michael wrapped his hand around my waist as if telling me it was okay, my mind finally found peace.

I closed my eyes. My breathing grew ragged. When I started to pant heavily, Michael lifted his head. A thin, long silver thread of saliva stretched between us. Michael called my name tenderly.

“There, Cecil.”

Still breathless, I covered my face with my palms. Michael gave me a light peck on the top of my head.

“See you later.”

With those words, Michael ran off toward the training grounds. He didn’t forget to shout “I love you!” before disappearing completely. I stood there aimlessly long after he was gone before checking the time.

Only five minutes left until class. I bolted toward the classroom. I managed to slide into my seat just before the professor arrived, but my heart refused to calm down. I was gasping so loudly that the students sitting nearby began to whisper.

“Is it hot today?”

“I don’t feel hot at all.”

I slumped over my desk to catch my breath. My thumping heart seemed to be mocking me.

‘This is why you should exercise once in a while.’

The physical pain of sprinting instantly pushed aside the fluttering excitement of a first kiss. But what was I supposed to do? I had no time to work out. I only managed to regain my strength after downing several cups of cold water from the back of the room. I can finally breathe again, I thought, letting out a long sigh.

“…….”

I secretly traced my lips with my finger. They say “late-blooming passion” is the scariest kind, and that was exactly us.

At first, it was just the back of the hand or the cheek, but how did we end up kissing? But it felt truly wonderful. I have no idea where Michael learned to do that. He’s been stuck by my side since we were kids; he shouldn’t have had time to learn such things. Is he just a natural?

Michael was gifted in many ways, but even this? That’s just bad game balance. I barely have any natural talents. But the thought was fleeting, and my lips curled into a smile again.

Well, it felt good, so whatever.

I felt like I could handle whatever nonsense the professor spewed today. The professor for this class, Professor Theodore, could be defined in one word: an “old fogey.” He always ruined the atmosphere by saying the weirdest things.

The thing is, he’s the only one who doesn’t realize it. How can he not know?

No, let’s not try to understand him. It’ll only exhaust my mental state. I told myself it was better to just let it go and opened my textbook. But then, Professor Theodore spoke before starting the lecture.

“I’m afraid I’ll have to end class a bit early today. I have somewhere I need to be urgently.”

Wait, for real? The faces of the students, including mine, brightened instantly.

“My grandson is getting married today.”

“Really? Congratulations, Professor!”

“Truly, congratulations!”

We offered our sincerest congratulations in unison. Up to this point, everything was great—heartwarming, even. Yes, exactly up to this point. The problem came next.

“Speaking of which, I don’t know what students these days think about marriage.”

The students collectively shut their mouths and avoided the professor’s gaze.

“Back in my day, you’d be of the age to have already married and started having or adopting children. Are there no married students in this class? Other classes have at least a few, but this class is the most serious case.”

Professor, what kind of reaction are you even looking for? And why is it ‘serious’ that no one is married?

“I don’t understand why people nowadays are so reluctant to marry. You must get married as early as possible. That’s how you mature. You students have no idea how hard married people study. Seriously, once they have a family to be responsible for, the look in their eyes changes.”

I fell into deep thought. Same-s*x marriage is allowed, and adopting children is allowed, but getting married “late” is a problem? What kind of world is this?

“Marriage is truly wonderful, yet students these days keep trying to delay it. Haha.”

The professor was truly something else. I thought I’d be able to laugh off anything today, but I couldn’t.

My mood soured in an instant. When I talked about marriage with Michael and Ronia, time flew by, but now I could track the passing seconds one by one. If being able to make a sacred institution like marriage sound so repulsive is a talent, then he’s certainly gifted.

“Well then, everyone, have a safe trip home.”

At least it ended early. I hummed to myself as I headed back to the dorms. I’m such a petty person—hating him one minute and then being happy just because he let us out early.

But thinking about it, Professor Theodore isn’t that bad. I’ve heard of other professors who make students write 100-page reports they’ll never read, or who openly criticize students’ looks.

Compared to that, Professor Theodore’s comments were nothing. So, the fact that I’m bothered by something like that means I’m just too sensitive… Huh? No, wait. I whipped my head around.

I thought this before, but my standards are seriously getting warped since I came here. Lying on my dorm bed, a sudden question popped into my head.

Are there no good professors in this academy?

The next day, that doubt grew even stronger.

“Professor, aren’t we having the pop quiz today?”

“I haven’t finished making the questions, so let’s just do it next week.”

Are there really no good professors in this academy? Having stayed up late to study, I barely managed to restrain the urge to tear my book apart and howl on the spot.

“A good professor?”

After all the classes were over that day, I asked Ronia and Michael.

“Yeah. Are there any good professors in your departments?”

“Hmm. When I first enrolled, there was a professor who was exceptionally kind and gentle,” Michael said with a bright smile. “He was arrested for embezzling the budget.”

“…….”

“No wonder the lunches we got during practical exams kept getting worse. In a way, it’s a good thing he got caught. If he hadn’t, we probably would have executed him with our own hands.”

“……Michael, saying that with such a gentle face makes it even scarier.”

“I cannot forgive anyone who messes with food.”

“I’ve never really listened to a lecture properly, so I wouldn’t know,” Ronia said, racking her brain. “Oh, I did have a few career counseling sessions with the Magic Department professors.”

“What did they say?”

“They told me I needed to lose some weight.”

“What does weight have to do with career counseling?”

“Don’t know. They just told me to lose weight out of nowhere in the middle of the session.”

“Excuse me, but is that person actually a professor?”

“Believe it or not, it’s a true story. What about you guys in the General Department? Lots of weird professors, right?”

“Yeah, obviously.”

The juice suddenly tasted bitter. I said dejectedly, “I went into class after pulling an all-nighter during exam week, and the professor told me I looked like a sick person and that if I had a girlfriend, I should go borrow her lipstick and put it on. Believe it or not, this is also a true story.”

“Ah, my swordsmanship professor keeps nagging short people to wear high heels or something,” Michael added.

We spent the next two hours blooming into conversation about weird professors, only to be seized by an inexplicable sense of disillusionment.

“If people like that can be professors, what are we?”

When I asked with my face buried in the table, Ronia replied in the same position.

“Students who are a bit lacking but still have a conscience?”

Michael, also with his face on the table, added, “It’ll be a disaster if we lose our consciences too, so let’s make sure we don’t lose that, no matter what.”

“Yeah, let’s do that.”

The three of us made a solemn vow. And the following week, looking haggard from another all-nighter, we asked the professor who was about to start the lecture:

“Professor, what about the pop quiz?”

The professor looked at us as if he were hearing about it for the first time.

“Huh? What pop quiz?”

We froze on the spot. After class ended, I sprinted to the dormitory. I opened Michael’s room with the key he had given me and walked in. Michael, who was resting since he had no morning training, looked at me with questioning eyes. I shouted:

“Hug me!”

“Okay!”

We threw our arms around each other. Ah, this is what true healing feels like. I rubbed my face against Michael’s chest. Michael cradled me in his arms and then naturally leaned back. The two of us lay on the bed, looking at each other and laughing.