but…i refuse

The young man regarded the girl before him with a sense of helplessness, pondering for a moment before finally making a decision.

“Uh… here!”

Su Xuan reached into his pocket and pulled out a wallet, from which he extracted a photograph.

The junior student gazed blankly at the picture, which depicted a sweetly smiling beauty with long, flowing black hair, her exquisite features outlining a captivating allure, and her radiant eyes shimmering with countless stars.

A subtle melancholy lingered between her brows, making her appear utterly pitiable.

Set against the backdrop of a twilight river, the shimmering surface of the water seemed to reflect a hint of sorrow, making the girl appear like a celestial being who had descended to the mortal realm in search of unrequited love.

“I… I’m so sorry… I had no idea, Senior, that you already had a girlfriend!”

The junior stammered an apology, bending over to return the photo to Su Xuan before departing dejectedly, the beauty’s image now back in Su Xuan’s hand.

Su Xuan merely offered a faint smile, yet he bore a striking seven-tenths resemblance to the beauty in the photograph, particularly in that shared melancholy, which was virtually identical.

Indeed, if not for his short haircut, a slightly longer mane would have made him utterly indistinguishable in gender.

He tucked the photograph back into his wallet and departed from the small grove.

****

Strolling unhurriedly towards the teaching building, his peripheral vision caught sight of the full-length mirror beside the stairwell.

Reflected within was a young man in a black, short-sleeved top—a fleeting glimpse that was nonetheless unforgettable.

His wasn’t the typical dashing handsomeness; rather, he possessed a beauty that could only be described as exquisite, akin to Björn Andrésen, with exceptionally refined features and a unique aura, like a millennium-old spirit nurtured in a Jiangnan water town.

That person was Su Xuan himself.

Su Xuan distinctly recalled that he had not always looked this way.

Three years prior, he had been a vibrant, handsome young man, intending to find a girlfriend in high school and experience an unforgettable romance.

However, due to certain circumstances, Su Xuan had rejected countless girls over the past three years, remaining utterly single even in his final term of high school.

Lost in thought, he arrived at his seat, located by the window in the back row of a single file.

No sooner had he sat down than the male student in front of him turned around, winking and grinning with a roguish charm.

“Su Xuan, well? That girl had good assets, didn’t she?”

“Not suitable.”

Su Xuan offered a faint smile, for being approached with a confession during the long break was hardly his first experience; it was all the fault of his accursed beauty.

“What a pity! That girl was easily an eighty-plus-pointer, and you rejected her?

If I hadn’t grown up with you, I might actually believe those rumors circulating among the girls.”

“Heh.”

What was there to say about those women?

Their gossip typically revolved around such notions as:

‘Su Xuan and Zhang Xun have never had girlfriends, and Su Xuan looks… could he be having an affair with Zhang Xun? Ah! I’m so excited!’

‘Just thinking that Su Xuan might be the man no woman in the world can ever have makes me so thrilled!’

They would gaze with mischievous delight at the interactions between Su Xuan and Zhang Xun, who was known as the “Scoundrel God” in their class, all while fantasizing about one day bringing both of them under their sway—pampering Zhang Xun by day and teasing Su Xuan by night.

These were all fujoshis (TL Note: A Japanese term referring to female fans of male homosexual relationships in fiction.), pure and simple.

Their class even had a few online writers who had spent months penning a fanfiction about Su Xuan, complete with illustrations, which they published on the school’s girls’ forum.

Virtually every girl in the entire school knew about this pair of boys in Class 012 of the senior year, who could satisfy their sordid fantasies.

Had it not been for an accident, where a female classmate inadvertently sent the story to Su Xuan, he might have graduated without ever knowing he had been portrayed as a ‘fallen woman’!

Upon seeing the file sent to his phone that day, Su Xuan didn’t sleep a wink all night.

After finishing the twenty-thousand-word fanfiction, Su Xuan’s first reaction was surprisingly that the writing was quite good…!?

For a week after reading it, perhaps due to some form of psychological contamination, Su Xuan dared not meet Zhang Xun’s gaze, though things were much better now.

At that moment, Zhang Xun, who sat in front, turned around again.

“Ah Xuan, the Phantasm Soul (TL Note: A unique spiritual entity or power that manifests in individuals in this world.) test is in a month.

Are you nervous?”

“…I suppose so.”

Su Xuan feigned indifference, though inwardly, he was terrified.

He harbored an unspeakable secret concerning his Phantasm Soul, and it was precisely this secret that had led him to avoid girlfriends for the past three years, and also caused the series of changes in his appearance.

“Ah Xuan is as steady as ever!

I’m a nervous wreck right now; this is a prime opportunity to attract junior students and escape singlehood!

Just imagining those fresh-faced juniors being awestruck by my unparalleled talent, practically begging to have my children, I…”

“Alright, alright, Xunzi, there’s still time to head to the restroom.”

“Tch, just you wait and see the might of your Scoundrel God!”

With that, Zhang Xun turned back around.

In truth, Zhang Xun, like Su Xuan, was quite popular, but unlike Su Xuan, he seemed perpetually unsatisfied, constantly cycling through girlfriends.

“I’m so exhausted from cultivating all night!”

Su Xuan yawned, resting his head on his desk, seemingly quite fatigued.

He had intended to catch up on sleep during the long break, but the girl’s interruption had consumed most of the time, so he quickly tried to snatch some rest.

****

Within a boundless space, a grey mist swirled, and a woman suddenly appeared before Su Xuan.

She was almost identical to the woman in the photograph, yet even more delicate and soft.

She glided forward, unhurried, until she reached Su Xuan, her lips moving as if speaking, though Su Xuan heard not a single word.

Then, the illusion shattered, and he faintly heard someone calling his name.

“Su Xuan… Su Xuan…”

“What do you want?”

“Wake up, Empress Dowager Chen (TL Note: A nickname for their teacher, Chen Yanli, implying strictness and authority.) is starting class.”

“Phew~”

Upon hearing that Empress Dowager Chen had arrived, his sleepiness was naturally suppressed.

Students’ fear of teachers, especially homeroom teachers, seemed to be an instinct in every world.

Relying on his blurry vision, he rubbed his eyes, and the hazy world began to sharpen.

A grey-haired female teacher, past middle age, entered the classroom.

Though not tall, her powerful aura instantly silenced the chattering of the students, and the sound of the blackboard being moved echoed from the teacher’s podium.

The all-in-one computer screen lit up, signaling that something important was about to be discussed.

As a USB drive was inserted, the entire classroom fell silent, save for the sounds of a single person working, and the computer’s startup music seemed remarkably loud.

“Class!”

“Stand up… Good morning, Teacher!”

“Good morning, students, please be seated!”

Adjusting her spectacles, her resonant voice echoed through the classroom.

“A soldier trained for a thousand days is used for one moment.

Students, your three years of high school are swiftly drawing to a close.

Days pass as quickly as turning book pages, and in the blink of an eye, the day of the Phantasm Soul test is upon us.

For nearly three years, you have focused on one crucial task: nurturing your souls.

And in just one month, the time will come to reveal your Phantasm Souls.”

Her pace was unhurried, and within her stern eyes lay a faint, almost imperceptible tenderness.

How many of these children would again fall in battle in the Chaos Realm (TL Note: A dangerous dimension from which powerful and evil creatures emerge.)?

How many would live out their lives in peace and security?

Three years is a long time, but how many such three-year periods does one have in a lifetime?

Ever since her own child perished in the Chaos Realm, she had dedicated herself to education, pouring all her emotions into these students, solely for the sake of their longer, more secure futures.

If it were possible, Chen Yanli wished all her students would possess Common Phantasm Souls (TL Note: A type of Phantasm Soul that is not suited for combat, typically leading to a more ordinary life.), which would mean they could only enter academic institutions and lead ordinary, worry-free lives.

However, this was ultimately just a fantasy.

If all students across the world possessed Common Phantasm Souls, then as the older generation of warriors passed away, the entire world would be consumed by darkness.

There is no such thing as peace and quiet; it is merely that someone is carrying the burden for you.

They are simply well-protected by the most heroic individuals among humanity.

Scanning the fifty-six students in the class—twenty-eight girls and twenty-eight boys—Chen Yanli seamlessly picked up her train of thought and continued speaking.

“At that time, none of you should be nervous.

The testing procedure has already been thoroughly explained to you.

Every individual possesses their own Phantasm Soul; some are better suited to serving society, while others are born warriors.

I do not wish for those with powerful Phantasm Souls to mock or look down upon those with weaker ones, nor do I wish for those with ordinary Phantasm Souls to feel inferior and give up on themselves.

At this stage, there are no losers, no winners.

Living your life well is the best outcome for everyone.”

As the days progressed, Empress Dowager Chen’s demeanor became less stern and more infused with tenderness and concern.

She no longer ruthlessly checked whether daily cultivation tasks were completed, but focused more on character development, hoping her students could shed their burdens.

The moniker “Empress Dowager Chen” was a historical remnant, no longer a term of fear but one of endearment.

In her class, students no longer whispered, not out of fear, but out of respect—a genuine, tangible care that every student could feel.

Su Xuan observed the silent students, wondering how many would shed tears at their parting, mostly girls, he presumed.

Empress Dowager Chen swept her gaze across the myriad familiar faces below, hesitating as if to speak, but finally opening her mouth.

“At this final juncture, I have little more to impart.

What needs practice, you can independently complete yourselves.

I cannot offer much more guidance.

However, in these last moments, I will speak once more of the advent of the Dark Era, so that you may understand the meaning of our existence.”

“It is unknown when, but in Azure Blue (TL Note: Refers to their planet, Earth, or the world they live in.), a chaotic, disordered Chaos Realm appeared.

Powerful and malevolent creatures emerged from within it; they possessed immense strength, astonishing speed, and some even wielded strange abilities.

Their unique material composition rendered technological weapons largely ineffective against them.

They arrived in this world like explorers discovering a new continent, invading and causing the Chaos Realm to expand across this land.”

“These are the beings now known as Abyssal Fiends (TL Note: The name given to the evil creatures emerging from the Chaos Realm.).

Having endured the darkest Double Nine Era (TL Note: A period of intense conflict and darkness in history, referring to the 99 years of the darkest period.), humanity defended its sovereignty with blood and iron.

In the midst of this struggle, humanity discovered and utilized a resource belonging to the invaders, and a new form of combat rapidly developed within the human world.

With these new combat methods, humans gradually gained the power to contend with the Abyssal Fiends, steadily controlling the expansion of the Chaos Realm.

Warriors continuously entered it to fight and acquire resources, a process that has persisted for two hundred years.

Over these two centuries, some names have shone brightly across the heavens, enduring for millennia; others remained unsung, yet were the pride of their families; and still others were ordinary people who simply contributed to the fabric of everyday society…”

Accompanying her speech, horrifying black fiends, energy channels soaring into the sky, countless warriors swearing their final vows at sunrise, thousands of small teams charging desperately, and a single blade cleaving through dark clouds to welcome the dawn—these powerful and evocative images were projected onto the all-in-one screen, slowly coming to life with Empress Dowager Chen’s narration.

Su Xuan listened and watched, utterly captivated.

He had heard this history many times before, yet each time, he felt a profound sense of gravity.

A short passage of words contained hundreds of years of arduous struggle and the deaths of hundreds of millions of vibrant lives.

Those living in safety could only learn about the appearance of the Abyssal Fiends through films, television dramas, or news reports, having never truly encountered them.

How terrifying the Abyssal Fiends truly were, those who had not personally experienced them could never fully comprehend.