Chapter 21 : Ddangdang

[Mangnani is on air now!]

[Broadcast Title: Explanation broadcast ]

The rate at which the number of viewers is increasing is extraordinary.

It’s called overnight stardom.

It may not be a fitting phrase in this day and age, but as a somewhat outdated person, that’s the expression that comes to mind.

I’ve become a well-known figure in various communities.

There are two nicknames that I see often. One is ‘Legendary Dirt Spoon’ and the other is ‘That Tit Cow’.

Of course, the former is a widely used, common expression, while the latter is a euphemism used in the art gallery to avoid getting sued.

Even if we put aside ‘That Tit Cow’ for now, shouldn’t I be very offended by the term ‘Legendary Dirt Spoon’?

It’s true that I’m poor, but why is that your gossip? Huh? Why are you guys so interested in other people’s lives?

However, when I think about the 8 million won in donations I received thanks to revealing such personal information, my annoyance quickly dissipates.

After all, money has a way of rationalizing many things.

They say that broadcasters make a living by selling their private lives.

In my case, it just has the word ‘internet’ attached to it. It’s a kind of lower-class celebrity concept.

The minor embarrassment is neutralized by the power of a large sum of money.

And as I’ve said before, I don’t really dislike being pitied.

The self-esteem that would make me feel ashamed of it has been ground to dust and disappeared somewhere.

When it was severe, I even enjoyed it, thinking, “Please pity me more.” I stopped doing that after realizing that my life was a comedy, not a tragedy.

To me, becoming famous for this reason is something I don’t really care about. Actually, I might even feel a little good about it.

If I can receive a lot of money in exchange for feeling a little miserable, I can feel even more miserable. When I think about it like that, I feel completely fine.

Now let’s move on to the second nickname. The guys in the art gallery seem to think that if they speak indirectly, like ‘That Tit Cow’, it doesn’t constitute defamation because they learned some strange things somewhere.

No, do they really think that this kind of ostrich-like behavior will work? Do they really not know that if it’s obvious who they’re talking about, they can be served with a lawsuit? How low is their intelligence?

As an authority on cyber obscenity, cyber insult, and defamation, I lament the stupidity of these young students and unemployed people. The future of this country, Joseon, is truly dark.

I’ll have to go through the hassle of taking numerous screenshots to prove to the police that ‘That Tit Cow’ in the art gallery is me, but that’s all it takes. It’s just annoying to take screenshots and print them out, but if I decide to sue, it’s a quick process.

It wouldn’t be difficult to explain to the police officer why my nickname is ‘Tit Cow’. The evidence is right there on my body. It might be a bit embarrassing to explain, but I can endure that much shame to screw over the people who hate me.

If the police are convinced, the prosecutor is convinced, and the judge is convinced, it’s a guilty verdict. Most of them are fines, but for those whose only job is to insult others, even a small brush with the law can be fatal.

Don’t ask me why I know so much about cyber obscenity, cyber insult, and defamation. You’ll get hurt if you know. Everyone has secrets they can’t tell.

I turned on the microphone and started the broadcast after seeing the number of viewers exceed 2,000.

“Hello everyone. This is Ruffian.”

-MorningRiceCakes: RuffRuff

-ChickenIsChicken: Explan

-GangdongRomanticist: Explan

-FlourNoodle: What are you explaining, though?

-Cigarette: Explan

The viewers demanded an explanation before I could even properly greet them. Do they even know what I’m trying to explain?

“There have been several allegations against me in the past few days. I’ll address them one by one.”

Allegation 1: Are your breasts fake?

“There’s been an allegation that my breasts are fake, that special effects makeup is so advanced these days that Chinese scammers are luring men with fake breasts.”

-SpicyPepper: There’s no way those are human breasts

-SweetRiceCake: Explain, explain!

-GoldRabbitSilverRabbit: Really?

I turned on the cam and zoomed in on my chest. Since I was wearing the same sleeveless top as yesterday, my cleavage and upper chest were clearly visible.

“Now, if I pinch like this, ouch, it hurts. See? It’s getting red. No matter how advanced technology is, can they do this? Even if they could, could I pull that off? It’s not a movie, it’s not a recording, it’s a live broadcast.”

I held up an internet clock on my smartphone to the cam to show that this was a live broadcast.

-Factorial: They are real breasts!

-Yang’s10: ooh ooh

-DeerFriendGoral: baby noises I’m a baby goral! Give me milk!

Actually, at first, I was going to stab myself with a knife and show the blood, but the person who gave me broadcast advice asked if I was crazy, that I’d get banned immediately if I self-harmed on broadcast, and that aside, where did the idea of showing blood even come from? I got scolded a lot.

No.

You know how in movies, they do that. Like stabbing your finger to write a blood oath.

That’s what I was thinking, so why are they making me out to be a weirdo?

That girl really doesn’t understand a man’s romance! Tsk.

“Well, there you have it. I think that clears up the fake breast allegation.”

[FullAmount donated a whopping 10,000 won!]

-I acknowledge, I acknowledge, I acknowledge, I acknowledge, I acknowledge

“Thank you, FullAmount. Thank you for the 10,000 won.”

[MacaroniGratin donated a whopping 10,000 won!]

-What did you eat to get so big, teacher?

“Well, I don’t know. Um, banana milk?”

I honestly don’t know. Ever since I fell into this world, they were already quite big.

-monkeymagic: Shouldn’t it be strawberry milk for this kind of thing?

-CheesePopcorn: Breaking news) It has been revealed that the banana milk company sponsored this advertisement

-KimHash: Explain the undisclosed advertisement!

[Pandaria donated a whopping 5,000 won!]

-You are indeed my mommy! I acknowledge it!

“Why am I your mom?”

This guy, I raised the minimum donation to 5,000 won, and he’s still here. I guess it’s good that it’s not a 1,000 won punch anymore.

-ConversationKingTalking: baby noises I’m a baby streamer, give me milk!

-JungleIsHell: baby noises baby noises

-ButHere’sTheThing: You seem to have a lot of maternal love, are you thinking of adopting me too?

[AdBlockAmbassadorKimJeongYeol donated a whopping 30,000 won!]

-That baby’s rice cooker looks quite big. What’s the capacity of that rice cooker?

“Well, it’s obviously for 2 servings, right? Since there’s a left and a right.”

-MorningRiceCakes: Aren’t you going to sue those guys?

-JungleIsHell: Why are you answering that seriously ᄏᄏᄏ

-Factorial: The lid being on the left and right and the capacity are different issues, aren’t they?

-Cigarette: Stop beating a dead horse

“People can make some compliments, some jokes, some whatever. But those guys in the art gallery who keep saying ‘That Tit Cow’ and talking about brothels and sponsors, be careful, okay? I can tell the difference between joking because you like me and being an *sshole because you hate me. If you’re being an *sshole because you hate me, because you’re jealous, you might get a letter from a legal institution. If you’re listening and you’re scared because you think it’s you, quickly delete your posts and run.”

I gave the middle finger to the cam. Isn’t this kind of hip-hop style?

Haters, f*ck you. Something like that.

‘Hmm, I was cool.’

After patting myself on the back, I moved on to the next allegation.

Allegation 2: Isn’t being a dirt spoon a concept?

“Let’s watch a video first. It’s a video I took yesterday before I moved.”

I played a video that was about a minute long, filmed with my phone camera.

It showed my room, the bathroom, and the hallway outside.

Since it was so small, it didn’t take long to look around.

The only furniture was a desk, a computer on top of it, a mini-fridge next to it, and a mattress on the floor.

There was no hanger to hang clothes, so they were all crammed into a clothes box and neatly organized.

If I left things messy like other people, there would be no room to even set foot in, so it was a forced neatness.

“This is the house I used to live in. I won’t comment on the address and price because it could harm the landlord and the next tenant. And this is the posture I was sitting in at that desk.”

I displayed a picture of my side profile sitting in front of the desk in my old room on the broadcast screen.

I covered my face with a sticker from a photo editing app.

[DogThatBarksWhenItSeesSilverHair donated a whopping 20,000 won!]

-Wait, what’s with the silver hair? Was that not a concept but real?

“Huh? I said I had silver hair from the beginning. I never hid it, so why are you so surprised?”

-ConversationKingTalking: Who would believe that ᄏᄏᄏᄏᄏᄏ

-hippopo: It’s not a wig?

-Economics101: It’s like a manga character come to life;

-JungleIsHell: Maybe her hair turned white from the stress of fighting with her teammates?

“Let’s move on from the hair, okay? It does make you squat, but your back is surprisingly straight. It’s not a weird, hunched posture just because I rest my boobs on the desk.

So I was fine even after sitting like that for ten hours.

I wasn’t just sitting there the whole time, I’d get up to drink water or go to the bathroom.”

[NovemberSixth donated a whopping 5,000 won!]

-Why are you torturing yourself, teacher!

“I’m telling you, that posture is surprisingly doable?”

[Ruffian’sShinSplintSoldier donated a whopping 10,000 won!]

-I tried it myself and it feels like my body is getting destroyed in an instant?

“That’s because you lack flexibility.”

I temporarily stopped the donations that kept mentioning unnecessary things and added more to the explanation of the dirt spoon fabrication allegation.

“First of all, I didn’t start the broadcast to get money.

I was just explaining the boosting allegations and answering donations kindly, and it just happened.

How could I have known how things would turn out, found a house like that, and set it up like that? How much money would I get for setting up that concept? Honestly, the chairman suddenly created that atmosphere, but it wasn’t originally going to be this big of a donation, right? Right? I think I’ve explained everything, so from now on, I’ll ban anyone who uses this to attack me.”

The second one seems to have gone smoothly as well.

Now for the third one, this isn’t an explanation of an allegation, but just an explanation of the situation.

“And, um, about me suddenly moving, you know? It’s not like I suddenly made a ton of money and got a taste for luxury and signed a lease for a monthly rent in a Gangnam officetel.

It’s just that someone I know saw the broadcast from the day before yesterday, and they were like, ‘What the hell are you living like?’ and told me to come to their house.

So, um, I was kidnapped. Yeah. Um. Yeah. That’s what happened. Yeah.”

It’s a ridiculous explanation even as I’m saying it myself.

The protagonist of that ridiculous story slid over.

Only her upper body below her neck was caught on cam.

The pretty hand attached to that upper body waved back and forth in front of the cam.

“Hello, hello, streamers, nice to meet you. I’m Casill, a freelance illustrator. I drew the cute doggy Ruffian on the thumbnail of this broadcast, you know?”

-Factorial: Noona, your body is also amazing ooh ooh

-Economics101: Wow! Casill! Cecilia!

-FlourNoodle: Is she a famous person?

-ConversationKingTalking: Ah! You don’t know Casill! She’s a famous talented artist who started getting attention for drawing the 5-star character Cecilia from the mobile game Tales of Wind in a really. f*cking. amazing. way. These days, she also draws a lot of YouTube thumbnails, so people are realizing that she can also do this simple, cute, adorable art style, and her stock is rising. She’s an awesome professional illustrator!

-SquidTakoYaki: I thought the Ruffian character had a familiar art style, it was from a famous illustrator;

-DeerFriendGoral: ᄅᄋᄏᄏ

“I thought our Ruffian was just a lonely house doggy, but it turns out she was almost an abandoned stray doggy. So I picked her up.”

Clap, So-eun clapped her hands once. And she proceeded as if my broadcast was hers.

“This apartment is under my name, and it’s just me and unnie living together, so don’t get any wrong ideas and rest assured.”

-SpicyPepper: Ruffian is now an abandoned stray doggy ᄏᄏᄏᄏᄏᄏ

-GoldRabbitSilverRabbit: She is cute

-ConversationKingTalking: Wow Casill noona ᄅᄋ I didn’t know anything about her, but it’s nice to see her on broadcast like this, I’m a fan

“You’re my fan? Thank you. But this is Ruffian’s broadcast, so please love Ruffian more.”

-MorningRiceCakes: Ruffian unnie ᄏᄏᄏ How can two such unfitting words be together

-CheesePopcorn: Ruffia’ni’, unni’e’ the rhyme is amazing

-Economics101: Is this real-life yuri? ooh ooh

Seeing some strange fantasies in the chat, I intervened and warned them.

“Stop the baseless shipping! Ahem, this is not that kind of broadcast. We’re just like sisters. Please stop imposing strange concepts on real people.”

-Yang’s10: Strong denial is strong affirmation…..

“Strong suspicion is a strong ban, you bastard.”

I banned the viewer who was going too far. I’m already a clown, but there’s no reason for So-eun to become one too.

“I’ll ban anyone who mentions other streamers, real people, or anyone I’m not close with, so be careful.”

-Economics101: You can touch me, but never my comrade!

-ConversationKingTalking: Is this the ‘righteousness’ they speak of?

-LastLightOfNationRuffian: Switch’s greatest hero, Ruffian! Switch’s greatest hero, Ruffian! Switch’s greatest hero, Ruffian! Switch’s greatest hero, Ruffian! Switch’s greatest hero, Ruffian! Switch’s greatest hero, Ruffian!

“You, should I call you Tit Cow or hero, pick one.”

I couldn’t control my anger for a moment and swore.

Why is that guy’s nickname change so grating?

But I didn’t think about banning him since I’ve seen him for a long time.

I’ll ban him later if he crosses the line.

Anyway, if we go back two days to why I suddenly ended up living in So-eun’s house…

A word from the author (Author’s note)

I put in too much content! I should split it into 1.5 parts!!!

I have to go back to days.