The Ill-Equipped Escort

“Oh, no, don’t try to scam me. I’m not falling for that!”

Unfortunately, the food buff proved utterly negligible.

“Ugh, why are you all so slow? Let’s hurry up.”

“Sir Haut, there’s no need to rush so much, but…”

It was because the Silver Knights were moving at an incredibly sluggish pace!

I knew the way myself. Though I’d been too busy hunting high-ranking demons to visit towns or cities, I had played the game for a long time. I even knew where the Holy Site was.

But I didn’t know what event I was supposed to receive, so I couldn’t just go ahead and wait. There might be other random events along the way, too.

“I wonder why these damned cutscenes can’t be skipped.”

“I’m sorry,” Faust said, looking crestfallen.

Ah, I felt a little bad about that. He barely understood what I was saying, yet he was so quick to pick up on my mood. It was strange how well that particular function worked.

It was a shame the screenshot function didn’t work either. Could I activate it somehow?

If I could take a picture of that and upload it, I’d probably get a lot of likes. It was a genuine waste.

“No, it’s nothing to be sorry about. It’s just that if we keep this pace, we won’t reach a village before sunset. I’m fine, but don’t your stats temporarily decrease if you camp outdoors?”

“What are stats, Sir?”

“Ah, damn, I should have installed the ‘Term Recognition Upgrade’ mod.”

That might have worked. Seeing his strangely realistic reactions, it seemed like the system had been upgraded somehow, but the low term recognition rate was frustrating.

“You all get tired if you sleep outside. As for me, there’s barely any change.”

Unlike players, NPCs needed to eat, sleep, and take care of themselves for a certain amount of time.

While players also needed to do so to some extent, it only resulted in a numerical decrease, with no significant perceived changes. In fact, I sometimes deliberately overexerted my character to gain status ailments.

No matter how high the degree of freedom, the main objective was to drive out the demons from this world and save it. If I stopped mid-battle to hunt demons because I suddenly needed the restroom, that wouldn’t look very cool.

At my words, Faust wore a peculiar expression. He was drenched in sweat, his face bewildered, which was quite amusing.

He subtly glanced behind him. The Silver Knights and the Priests of Hamman who had been following were now clutching their trembling legs, gasping for breath.

“Sir Haut, I think we need to rest for a bit. To continue like this…”

“Haa, so we won’t be able to descend today after all. It can’t be helped.”

This is why I hated escort quests. They were annoying.

At my words, the men, who had been exchanging glances, began to look around. Let’s see, I remembered a small valley nearby, but there didn’t seem to be any open ground suitable for a clearing. There were many large rocks near the water, but they seemed too small for everyone to camp on.

“Hey, hey, all of you, move aside. I’m going to make a spot for camp.”

“S-Sir Haut? No, wait, what do you mean by that…?”

“Just move quickly. Move, move. It’ll be a pain if you die.”

I didn’t know what they misunderstood, but the Priests of Hamman quickly retreated, their faces pale with fright.

I opened my inventory window and checked for anything useful. First, I ruled out the fork since it couldn’t use area-of-effect skills. The flame-enchanted sword was convenient, but I hated the soot. The axe would require me to personally hack and push, which was too bothersome…

“Found it. ‘Isra’s Sword’.”

[ ‘Isra’s Sword’ — One-Handed Sword

Damage 4 / Weight 0 / Value 0 / Durability Infinite

This is the sword of Isra, the mountain keeper. It’s only good for cutting grass. He received it as a gift from his former lover. This sword will never allow anyone to die.

Additional Effects: Cannot receive proficiency bonus effects. / Critical hits will never activate. / Struck targets are pushed back and gain temporary invincibility. / If the sword is embedded, the target remains invincible and status effects do not progress. ]

Honestly, this was a quest-item junk sword, kept only for its appearance. It looked decent, but as a weapon, it was utterly useless.

Think about it. A sword is fundamentally a melee weapon, but this one’s damage was awful, and every time you hit an opponent, they’d be pushed back. That meant you’d have to keep chasing them.

It might be different if there was bonus damage when they were pushed back, but they became temporarily invincible while being pushed. No damage registered!

Once, I embedded the sword in an escort target’s back and proceeded with an escort event. I figured as long as they stayed alive, it counted, so I tried a trick, but their favorability plummeted to a desperate level.

“Damn it, I saved their life, what more could they want?!”

However, it did have a certain demand among players who enjoyed life skills rather than combat or quests.

They said that if you used it to clear weeds, they’d all fly away at once, making cleanup easy. Moreover, since the cut foliage flew off in good condition, it was also good for gathering.

I never thought I’d end up using it like this. Thinking that, I swung Isra’s Sword at the spot where the Priests of Hamman had cleared away. It sounded like I was swinging a club.

Whoosh—as I swung it forward, trees instantly snapped and flew away. The area where I swung the sword was left wide open and empty. Some tree roots remained, but that couldn’t be helped.

“S-Sir Haut? What is this?”

“There’s no place for this many people to camp out. There’s a waterfall nearby with some flat rocks, but at night, bloodsucking fireflies come out, making it hard to sleep. Besides, you can’t go any further anyway. Just sleep here.”

Was it because I’d been focusing too much on boss raids lately? I didn’t recall seeing such reactions before. Usually, even if they were surprised, it was only for a moment, and then they’d get back to what they were doing.

Why were they all staring like that? They looked like they’d seen a ghost. It was really annoying to be treated like a ghost by NPCs.

“What’s with those looks? I went to all this trouble for you.”

At my outburst of annoyance, they finally seemed to snap out of it and began to hastily organize their belongings. They pulled out a pile of sleeping bags in one corner, chopped the fallen trees for firewood, and started a fire to prepare a meal.

This was strange. Faust was a high-ranking NPC, almost like a cardinal, so why was their camping setup so shoddy? Shouldn’t they at least be able to pitch tents?

I approached Faust, who was making firewood from the fallen trees, and asked, “Is there nothing more?”

“Uh, pardon? What do you mean?”

“Are you guys beggars? Or is this all you’re doing because I haven’t raised your favorability yet?”

He didn’t seem to understand what I was saying. Ugh, seriously. What was this? Why was everything so shoddy? Faust stared at me with a blank expression, his mouth agape.

“My patience has limits!”

“Jack! Hold on! Don’t make things worse!”

“Let go! There’s a limit to rudeness! How could a lunatic dressed in nothing but underwear catch demons in the first place?! Is the Captain and everyone else really believing this fraud?!”

“Stop it! It’s true there were no demons there! And with that level of swordsmanship just now, he’s at least stronger than us!”

“Isn’t he a demon himself?! He’s naked and suddenly a sword the size of his arm just pops out of nowhere!”

“Why would a demon help us? Calm down!”

What? Why were they fighting? The male character, called Jack, was yelling and trying to lunge forward, but the other priests around him were holding him back. Was he a major character too? He was quite handsome. Black hair, brown eyes. With his fiercely upturned eyes and strong features, he looked like a typical hot-headed character.

I pointed a finger at the guy called Jack and asked Faust, “Is it saved? Can I load a previous branch?”

“I don’t understand what you’re saying.”

‘The system window isn’t opening, so it seems like saving and loading aren’t possible either. The NPC explanation function doesn’t seem to be working.’

Any NPC was supposed to answer questions about the system, regardless of the current conversation, because it was hard to find settings data during the game. Seeing how flustered he was, was it completely unresponsive?

“That’s strange. Where did my favorability drop? I never even hit you.”

“I don’t understand a single word you’re spouting! What insane nonsense are you talking about?!”

‘Have I only been fighting too much? I haven’t seen people in so long that I can’t follow the conversation at all.’

“You haven’t seen people in a long time?”

Suddenly, it grew quiet. This was driving me crazy. Why did they keep doing this? When was this damned system going to be fixed? If I had done this before, it would be fine, but this was my first time, so I didn’t know much. It was full of bugs.

Even so, my mind tried to recall when I had last visited a city.

“Was it three years ago in game time? Aside from getting the ‘Soft Slime Set for Adults Only’ during the 5th-anniversary launch event… I don’t think I’ve descended since then.”

“Then what have you been doing here naked?”

“Hunting demons, of course. What else would I be doing?”

His way of speaking was strangely human-like. He couldn’t understand any system language, yet he reacted so well to things like this.

It was unsettling.

“I don’t quite understand, but… so you’ve only been hunting Medusa for three years?”

“I’ve hunted so many… I think my favorite is Zeras of Lamentation. I’ve probably hunted him over a thousand times?”

“Don’t lie! There’s only one Zeras of Lamentation! How could you hunt him a thousand times?”

“I kill him and then revive him. When he revives, I kill him again, and again.”

‘Ah, maybe they don’t recognize it in vanilla (the game in its original state without additional elements)? This might cause the story to get tangled due to a bug. I’ll just play as much as I can and then back it up when I log out. They’ll probably patch it later.’

I took out all the Tokens of Zeras of Lamentation from my inventory. Ah, this. Now that I took them out physically, there was a considerable amount. They piled up in front of me. Was this an event? I showed them, hoping it would give me something if I authenticated them.

The Priests of Hamman and the Silver Knights approached, examining the tokens I had laid out. Some looked closely at them, then shrieked, collapsing to the ground and scuttling backward.

Seeing that, I was a little disappointed. It seemed like it didn’t give anything. I usually don’t bother with these relationship events… Tch.

“T-They’re real… They’re really the Tokens of Zeras of Lamentation…”

“How can there be so many of them?”

“I just said it. I killed him and revived him countless times…”

“Isn’t this guy crazy?!”

“Hey, hey, watch your mouth! What if he kills you too?!”

I didn’t know what they wanted. I showed them, and they still complained. I subtly noticed the sun setting. It would be night soon, but these guys didn’t seem to have any intention of finishing the camp. Or was it because I hadn’t raised their favorability enough? Ah, come to think of it, my current character’s reputation was almost zero.

Was that why they ignored me? If so, it made sense.

“Instead of worrying about useless things, you all should just hurry up and rest.”

“Who could be in their right mind in this situation?!”

“Why do you keep yelling at me? Just be quiet. Before I kill you, quest or no quest.”

As I grumbled, the man froze stiff and shut his mouth. Everyone glanced at me, trembling. Ah, I don’t know. Thinking about it only made me tired. I looked through my inventory again to see what was left. Aside from my collection, there wasn’t anything particularly useful.

I should have transferred at least my previous character’s items if I had known this would happen. My previous character, whom I raised to be the final boss of a thief organization, had so many items. Now, I had almost every type of item in my inventory, but the quantities were very low. It was a shame, but it couldn’t be helped.

“I don’t have any camping gear. The few I have are too precious to use here.”

I pondered for a moment, then took out some food from my inventory. I had made a lot of food while training my skills. Since I didn’t need any buff effects at my level, I hadn’t eaten them, so I had a lot stockpiled.

“Eat up.”

The man who had been stoking the fire and boiling water stood awkwardly, staring at me, but I ignored him. It was preserved food anyway. It probably wouldn’t even have a buff.