Can only watch

In an instant, Xie Shenhong thought his ears were failing him.

However, upon seeing the genuine expression on Lyte’s face, he understood that the man was, at the very least, earnest in his words.

“Why would you say that? Lyte, you’ve helped me so much; how could I possibly dislike you?”

Xie Shenhong adopted an innocent, bewildered expression.

“That’s precisely why I’m asking: have I done anything poorly?”

‘Everything about you is terrible; if I had to pinpoint it, it would be your very existence.’

“That’s not it at all…”

Xie Shenhong adopted the gentle tone he typically used when comforting others.

“Shenhong, it’s alright if you dislike me, but I hope you won’t keep it bottled up inside.”

Xie Shenhong couldn’t help but sigh.

It was clear to him now that Lyte wouldn’t rest until he tore down Xie Shenhong’s facade.

Yet, he would never allow this fellow to have his way.

“Lyte, everyone harbors secrets… Even you must have things you find difficult to speak of, don’t you?”

Xie Shenhong bowed his head slightly, revealing a sorrowful expression that made him seem on the verge of tears, utterly vulnerable.

“So please, don’t press me any further.”

‘Damn it, I’m going to puke.’

‘What am I even doing?’

‘This is so fake, so agonizing… Please, don’t make me keep up this act.’

Xie Shenhong cried out in his heart.

He genuinely enjoyed treating others with sincerity.

Indeed, the reason he was so beloved by his schoolmates as Princess Shenhong wasn’t due to fawning or feigned cuteness, but rather his earnestness and genuine consideration for others.

Yet, he could not extend any of this to Lyte, the villain who had destroyed his kingdom!

It was true that Lyte had uttered many beautiful words, many of which had resonated with him, and he had indeed helped Xie Shenhong significantly… not to mention that Lyte hadn’t yet committed any atrocities in this lifetime.

But still, whenever he closed his eyes, the tragic scenes from his previous life would flood his mind, constantly reminding him just how wicked and unforgivable an enemy Lyte truly was.

Maintaining a facade was already the absolute limit of his capabilities.

“Shenhong… I truly only wish to help you,” Lyte said.

“I know I can’t please everyone, and you have every right to dislike me, but could you please not wear such a pained expression?”

‘So that’s how it is.’

‘Ultimately, it was still his own failing.’

He had always been able to lie, even using white lies to help others, so why had he been exposed so thoroughly this time?

And exposed so completely.

He never imagined the reason was his own guilt over having to lie.

He truly was useless.

Even when facing an enemy, he couldn’t bring himself to abandon his personal morals.

‘Burying personal emotions… he simply couldn’t do it!’

“If it’s too much, you could always get angry at me like you did at first, curse me, or even hit me.”

“I won’t do that.”

Xie Shenhong lifted his head, shaking it resolutely.

“I merely harbor some things in my heart; what they are, I cannot tell you, but I truly don’t dislike you.”

Unlike moments before, Lyte could distinctly sense that Xie Shenhong’s aversion towards him had vanished.

“Shenhong, you…”

Yet, it wasn’t that Xie Shenhong had revealed his true self to him.

“Lyte, please trust me.”

Rather, the Xie Shenhong he had first encountered, the one who would hurl harsh words at him… had completely disappeared.

****

In the performing arts, there exists a concept known as ‘method acting’.

Specifically, it refers to an actor fully immersing themselves in a role, becoming the character they portray.

Xie Shenhong was currently in a similar state.

To be precise, unable to find a way to resolve his overwhelming hatred for Lyte, he had ultimately chosen to completely cast aside his personal emotions.

Only the persona he usually presented remained.

However, it was still merely acting; once the performance concluded, the actor would revert to their original identity and resume their own life.

By the time Xie Shenhong emerged from this state, Lyte was nowhere to be found.

Recalling his recent memories, Xie Shenhong realized that Lyte had departed with a pained expression.

‘Damn it…’

Xie Shenhong had to admit that, upon seeing Lyte in such a state, even knowing his adversary was undeserving of sympathy, an uncontrollable sense of guilt still welled up within him.

‘Is it because I witnessed what the original Hai Zhu did that I’m subconsciously refusing to become such a person, thus growing soft-hearted?’

This was the only reason Xie Shenhong could conceive.

‘For today, I’ll avoid seeing Lyte. As for tomorrow… I’ll meet him while maintaining this detached, emotionless persona.’

Xie Shenhong hastily left the school.

Along the way, his emotions remained deeply conflicted.

Beyond his immediate emotional turmoil, another issue was the severed intelligence line with the Imperial spies after his falling out with Lyte, leaving him clueless as to how to proceed with his investigations.

‘I truly acted too impulsively, too inflexibly… If that guy wanted me to curse him, I should have just done it. Was there really a need to put on an act?’

Despite these thoughts, deep down, he was unwilling to do so.

Realizing this, Xie Shenhong let out a frustrated sigh.

Immediately, however, his expression shifted to one of alertness, and he slowly halted his steps.

Someone was approaching, and their target was him.

Xie Shenhong quickly gripped the golden pocket watch nestled against his chest.

Should anything truly happen, his real reliance wasn’t the Crimson Twin Guns, but his identity as a ‘power bank’.

Soon, the newcomer stood before him, bowing respectfully.

“Lord Xie Shenhong, my master has long admired you and wishes to invite you to his residence for a discussion. We hope you will grant us the honor.”

Xie Shenhong gazed at the man, who was dressed in ancient Hanfu and appeared exceptionally rigid, then gently lowered his hand.

“May I ask, sir, who your master is?”

“This humble one comes from the Sima family.”

“So, it is General Sima’s invitation. I am most honored.”

“Then, please follow me.”

At the man’s invitation, Xie Shenhong boarded a horse-drawn carriage, a sight rarely seen these days, and proceeded towards the old city district.

‘(Excellent, this is truly a blessing in disguise.)’

In stark contrast to his outward composure, Xie Shenhong’s heart was now brimming with joy.

For the General Sima he was about to visit was none other than Sima Le, a Kingdom General and a suspected member of the Society of National Saviors, who would become the central figure of the rebellion four days hence!

Ten years prior, he had been one of the few generals who remained in the Kingdom to fight alongside Nangong Yan, subsequently earning numerous merits in the campaigns to unify the East, truly a paragon among loyal subjects.

Yes, he might have been a bit extreme, which led him to join the Society of National Saviors.

However, to falsely accuse him of treason and eliminate him for this reason… that would undoubtedly be akin to severing one’s own arm, a foolish maneuver no less egregious than King Zhao’s misguided decision to believe slander and execute Li Mu.

Originally, Xie Shenhong had been pondering how to contact him and the Society of National Saviors… He never expected them to come knocking on his door themselves.

In this life, he absolutely had to save them!

And he would also give that Lyte fellow a taste of his own medicine!

He had been thoroughly confused by Lyte… His true goal was to save the Kingdom, to save humanity.

There was no need to agonize over his relationship with Lyte at all!

****

“No, why did I run away?”

Once his emotions settled, Lyte punched himself.

He had promised himself he wouldn’t be afraid.

Yet, Xie Shenhong’s unexpected evasiveness had filled him with profound guilt.

By the time he came to his senses, he had already fled so far.

He truly was… pathetic.

However, there were still insights to be gained.

‘Shenhong doesn’t dislike me… but rather sees me as an enemy?’

Lyte let out a sigh.

He had witnessed similar situations before.

At that time, he had been escorting Imperial prisoners.

Some of the populace would hurl stones, while others merely seethed with anger but refrained from action.

Still others watched with numb indifference.

Recalling Xie Shenhong’s demeanor during their first encounter, Lyte could now confirm—

‘Shenhong probably knew I was an Imperial citizen all along… No.’

It was highly probable that Xie Shenhong even knew the identity he dared not speak of.

‘I’m truly such a loser…’

Lyte hastily returned to the training grounds, only to find Xie Shenhong was no longer there.

‘Did he go back to the classroom?’

Lyte rushed to the library and various other places Xie Shenhong might have gone, but his search yielded nothing.

‘Could he have gone home?’

Lyte hurried towards Xie Shenhong’s home, but someone called out to him midway.

“Lyte, wait a moment.”

It was a classmate named Bai Wanhua, whose favorite pastime was skipping elective classes to roam around and flirt with girls.

“What is it? I’m busy.”

“Busy with what? It’s obvious you’ve angered your girlfriend and are rushing to explain yourself,” Bai Wanhua said with a mischievous grin.

“Sorry, I have to go.”

Lyte turned to leave, but Bai Wanhua immediately pulled him back.

“Hold on, what’s your hurry, kid? You’re looking for Princess Shenhong, aren’t you? I just saw him heading towards the Sima family’s estate.”

Upon hearing this, Lyte’s face instantly turned ashen.