The Hell of Ridicule and a Mysterious Newcomer

“Teacher! My question is…”

A mysterious youth, sporting a half-centimeter, military-training-regulation buzz cut, bravely stood up with a surge of righteous indignation.

“…Uh…”

“Wait… student… have we met before? Could you be… a new student?”

“Teacher! It’s me! I’m Zhuge Yinglang!”

“………………..”

“You’re… that… Zhuge… Yinglang… student?”

The classical literature teacher’s usually comical face now held a trace of solemnity.

“…I’m sorry, Zhuge student…”

“…Although… I know that laughing at one’s own student is not the mark of an excellent teacher…”

“But I simply can’t help myself! Hahahaha!”

The classical literature teacher, utterly devoid of dignity, hunched over the podium, doubling over with laughter.

An odd atmosphere enveloped the classroom.

Almost everyone’s gaze was fixed on the mysterious youth who stood before them.

The young man, once brimming with heroic spirit and an air of grandeur, now stood with his head held high, though his confidence seemed to falter.

His sword-like eyebrows, which had once seemed to cleave through clouds and soar towards mountains, now rested heavily above his eyes, resembling a dense thicket.

His cheeks, once bright and charming, now bore a faint flush, framing a pair of clear eyes and gleaming teeth.

A small, cherry-like mouth was a curious accent on what had once been a perfectly sculpted, jade-like face.

****

Just a few minutes earlier, a different image came to mind.

Beneath a cascade of brilliant, sun-kissed golden hair, a pair of hawk-like eyes had gleamed with a subtle, cold light.

Every glance and smile had exuded both amiability and sharpness, creating an impression that, while not overly intimate, felt profoundly sincere, making one eager to engage with him.

****

The contrast… it was rather stark.

“…I hadn’t noticed before… but is that really Zhuge student? Pfft…”

“Pfft… I’m sorry… at least ten minutes ago, it was… Hahahaha!”

“…Truly the Class Monitor’s work… I never thought that if that kid Zhuge… had short hair… it would be… pfft… like this…”

“Though he still looks good, I suppose… but it feels more like Tang Dynasty aesthetics, pfft! Hahahaha!”

“………………..”

A phenomenon known as the ‘hell of ridicule’ inexplicably surrounded Zhuge Yinglang, who still stood with his head held high and chest puffed out.

“How can you be like this! I… aren’t we all comrades?!”

“How could you do this?!”

“W-w-we were all…!”

‘No! There was still one person!’

‘Sugiyama wouldn’t mock him, surely!’

Zhuge Yinglang turned his expectant gaze towards his deskmate, a close friend he had only recently made, hoping for a glimmer of light from that hell of ridicule.

“Hehe… a baby face… I’m sorry, I can’t help it, forgive me, Zhuge student!”

“Ahahaha!”

“You… you beasts! Wuwuwu!”

Like a young girl who had endured some unspeakable ordeal, the youth named Zhuge Yinglang could no longer maintain his brave demeanor. He simply slumped weakly onto his desk, sobbing uncontrollably.

The only one who didn’t smile was I, the culprit behind all this.

I recalled the scene of the scissors dancing in my hand.

Though I hadn’t felt anything unusual at the time, being ‘reminded’ by the entire class…

Yet, remembering Zhuge’s previous standard, sunny, handsome, and sociable face, compared to his current baby face with thick eyebrows and a prominent forehead…

‘Pfft~!’

****

Smack! A loud bang echoed as a hand hit a desk.

No matter what he had endured, Zhuge Yinglang once again stood tall, chest out, a dazzling, almost unbearable brilliance radiating from his eyes.

“Teacher! I have something to report!”

“It’s about someone here who has severely violated school rules!”

All the laughter in the classroom ceased abruptly, replaced by an expectant silence, as everyone settled in to watch the unfolding drama.

‘A school rule violation? And in this class, presided over by the Class Monitor, who, no matter how innocent she appeared, was undoubtedly black to the core once peeled back?’

“Oh?”

Naturally, Zhuge’s declaration also captured my attention.

“Yes! That’s right! In our class, there’s a student who is currently in severe violation of two of our school regulations!”

Zhuge Yinglang, not backing down, patted his chest with his left hand to emphasize his sincerity.

“The first rule is that girls are absolutely not allowed to wear male school uniforms! See Article Four of the school rules for details…”

“Huh?!”

I immediately felt a bad premonition and was about to slam my hand on the desk and stand up. However, before I could, another student’s voice rang out.

“Wait! Teacher, I have something to say!”

Judging solely by the pitch, it was impossible to determine the speaker’s gender. Both a ‘cute boy’s voice’ and a ‘strong girl’s voice’ could vaguely describe the stiff yet slightly soft tone.

“Ah? It’s Shiratama…”

“Teacher Shangguan, it’s Shiratama Manatsu. My name is Shiratama Manatsu.”

Every word the youth spoke seemed to carry a strong sense of confidence, making it almost impossible to detect any respect for elders in their tone. Yet, strangely, it didn’t evoke any disgust.

The speaker instantly drew the attention of the entire class, and at that moment, their figure registered in my retina.

Blue-purple hair, possibly dyed, obscured the sides of the youth’s face. Due to the hat on their head, I couldn’t get a full view from my angle. However, simply from their slender yet upright posture, one could discern a calm and composed demeanor, as if they could remain unruffled at any moment.

‘That person…’

‘Shiratama Manatsu, male, between fourteen and fifteen years old, transferred from abroad to Gekkōkan Academy last year…’ At least, that was the information about Shiratama that replayed in my mind, as commonly known by everyone.

As for the remaining information… although I wasn’t sure of its credibility, judging by the faint whispers I’d overheard, Shiratama was apparently considered the ‘class idol’ of Class 2-B.

‘—Whether it’s their impeccable conduct or their handsome and amiable appearance, they make girls’ hearts pound uncontrollably. They are truly the undisputed class idol.’

Youli had told me this.

‘How annoying…’

A sudden blockage formed in my heart, but it strangely dissipated almost as quickly as it appeared.

According to Youli, Shiratama’s only flaws were probably the peculiar deerstalker hat they always wore and their ‘taciturn’ personality.

It was said that they could remain silent all evening if no one spoke to them.

“Teacher Shangguan, I recall that when I first transferred here, ‘that matter’ was brought to the attention of Gekkōkan Academy’s chairman by a friend at the Metropolitan Police Department.”

Shiratama said, a hint of caution in their voice.

“Oh… you mean… the exception?”

“Yes, understood, Shiratama-kun.”

Shiratama sat down.

However, the murmuring beneath the podium was considerable. After all, the amount of information that could be gleaned from Shiratama’s few words was quite substantial.

‘Metropolitan Police Department.’

‘Chairman.’

‘Exception.’

‘Such a background, no matter how one looked at it, suggested considerable influence.’

“Oh? Metropolitan Police Department? Could it be… a young master from the police force? I never would have guessed…”

“That Shiratama?”

“Hmph… What good is the Metropolitan Police Department? It doesn’t bring in as much money as my young master father does… A mere salary system… Indeed, they’re just here to highlight this young master’s handsome and dashing yet ordinary face…”

I, however, looked at the youth named Shiratama Manatsu with growing doubt.

‘Is that really a boy?’

If one ignored the concealment of the deerstalker hat on ‘his’ head, he looked, by all accounts, like an incredibly beautiful girl!

And that deerstalker hat, which could easily bring to mind a certain special profession, combined with Shiratama’s subtle aura…

It was all very strange.

“Hey, hey… Youli…”

I poked Youli’s fair arm, which was neatly laid out on her desk.

“Hmm? What is it, Little Qi?”

“That… Shiratama, what’s their background?”

“Eh? Little Qi, you don’t know? Shiratama-kun is a private detective with close ties to the Metropolitan Police Department… Our Tenshouin Group has even dealt with them before…”

“You said… a private detective?”

“That’s right. Don’t let Shiratama-kun’s age fool you; they’ve already assisted the police in solving over twenty cases… It’s said that, apart from their sole encounter with ‘that phantom thief,’ they haven’t had a single failure on their record.”

“Huh?! A phantom thief?!”

My tone suddenly rose sharply. Fortunately, the entire class was currently discussing Shiratama, so they didn’t pay too much attention to Youli and me, who were seated in the corner.

The mere thought of a phantom thief immediately brought to my mind that particular Mary Sue phantom thief – the one I dreamed of devouring, biting to death, the one who had caused my mental breakdown and brain edema.

That thief had caused my ‘family to be ruined,’ preventing me from living the life of a ‘rich young lady’…

‘Ptooey, ptooey… what was I thinking?’

…No, it was the one who had prevented me from living the life of a ‘rich young master,’ and indirectly led to my mother’s complete disappearance ten years later, during my high school years.

Regardless, phantom thieves were characters who absolutely, without fail, had to be ‘completely erased’ from this world the moment they were encountered!

“Phantom Thief… X!”

I almost gritted my teeth as I uttered the name that belonged to a gray memory from my childhood.

“Uh… Little Qi, are you alright?”

“………Ahaha~ My apologies, I lost my composure.”

I casually smiled at Youli, dismissing her worries, then looked up at Shiratama Manatsu, who had just sat down in front.

‘Truly…’

‘…What a good person!’

Shiratama seemed to notice my gaze, and after lowering their brown deerstalker hat, they turned and offered a sweet smile in return.

‘…But isn’t ‘sweet’ a bit misplaced when used to describe a boy?!’

Cough, cough.

The teacher cleared her throat, apparently ready to resume the lesson.

Consequently, only one aspiring youth remained standing in the classroom, still sporting his military-training-regulation buzz cut. Yet, at that moment, he seemed to have been forgotten by the entire world.