Chapter 38: Balancing the Stream: Competition and jealousy

I’ve been trying to stream regularly these days. Through some experimentation, I’ve found that streaming on a regular schedule does increase the number of consistent viewers.

I mean, I like having a lot of viewers too.

– An ally has been slain.

“Seriously, damn… was going in there really the right move?”

That was kind of hilarious.

Is that supposed to be Grandmaster-Challenger level…?

I feel like I’d at least be able to pull my weight there.

That’s a bit much.

“Sigh…”

The level in the Grandmaster-Challenger tier is really falling apart.

As I thought about this and was about to press down on the keyboard…

“Sigh, never mind.”

Let’s hold back just one more time.

Lately, I’ve found myself more averse to cursing. Even trolling is down compared to before.

– An ally has been slain.

– An ally has been slain.

“What the…”

…But that doesn’t mean I hold back all the way.

Cheo-juk-juk-cheo (I hyun): Ah, please.

Cheo-juk-juk-cheo (I hyun): Please stop fighting, seriously.

Yeah, not holding back is better for my health.

My simmering anger quickly subsides.

But I think, at some point, my response strategy for this rank became known.

[All Chat] Kim Joon-joon (Zhang Bei): Don’t say that.

[All Chat] Kim Joon-joon (Zhang Bei): Miss Beautiful

[All Chat] Kim Joon-joon (Zhang Bei): Don’t ruin that pretty face.

“Aaaaah!”

I slammed my keyboard in embarrassment.

My fist only ended up hurting.

“Damn it! I’m really going to kill them!”

That guy has been doing this for ages.

It’s a total trap. Now, every time the streamer gets mad, this happens.

I guess word spread to the highest ranks.

They’d know better than anyone.

The community there is smaller and full of fanatics, so they probably keep up with forums too. Even pro players check out game communities.

But to say all that in All Chat, not even in Team Chat.

My face is burning hot.

It’s technically a compliment, but it doesn’t feel good.

I kept glancing at the chat window.

Please, please, ignore it. Please, let them all be foreigners.

Of course, that doesn’t happen.

[All Chat] Dumpling Wrapper (Dennis): What’s going on?

[All Chat] Dumpling Wrapper (Dennis): Is Cheo-juk-juk-cheo streaming?

[All Chat] Ramen Water Control Master (Ji Sat): ??

The next part went exactly as expected.

In the end, all I could do was block everyone and continue the game.

These days, whenever I start typing, it’s as if a trap gets set up, so I can’t really curse anymore.

It’s not like there’s a group chat they’re all in, but they do this every time I open my mouth.

Damn bastards…

After the game of VALORANT ended, I decided to cool off for a bit by chatting.

Most streamers would use this time to drop a topic and encourage donations.

I know how to throw out obvious cues for donations too.

Just bring up a divisive topic, and people will naturally start arguing.

And, of course, I’m a pro at that.

But I don’t really want to do that with my viewers. It’s kind of like trolling.

Trolling is only fun when it’s with strangers. When it’s directed at viewers, I feel a bit guilty.

Honestly, they’re people I care about.

You don’t need to know someone’s face to care about them.

Am I being a hypocrite?

Right. I am indeed trash.

“I like spicy hot pot. Also tteokbokki… oh, and octopus and tripe stew too.”

– A typical girly thing to say.
– She’s in the top 50% of girly types, haha.
– And those are all really filling dishes.
– How does she eat all that?

“I just put it in the fridge and eat it later. It’s nice because I can eat it twice.”

So, while I was making small talk about my favorite foods…

A message popped up in chat.

– Jieun’s starting her stream, haha.

“Huh? What are they talking about?”

I temporarily blocked the two who weren’t focused on me and waited for a response from the chat.

It’s always a bit sad to permanently block someone, so I avoid doing that.

Anyway.

– Your ‘unnie’ started streaming.

“Really? Jieun unnie went live?”

– Yeah, didn’t you know?
– She’s trending these days, haha.

Quietly, I searched for Yoo Jieun’s username on Bell.

… She just started, and she already has 400 viewers.

“…What.”

That’s similar to the numbers I used to get.

I’m at 1,300 right now…

…

I remember hearing a tip on Bell about streaming once: be careful about others stealing your share of the viewer pie.

There’s only a limited audience watching, so it’s a structure where people divide them up.

Yoo Jieun and I are bound to share some of that viewer pie.

Female, high-ranked, VALORANT.

We overlap perfectly.

Feeling a twinge of anxiety, I gulped.

Then, my viewer count started to drop.

From 1,100 down to 1,000, then 900.

And before I knew it, Yoo Jieun’s viewer count was up to 700.

Well, it’s fine.

They’ll come back eventually. There’s no way they can forget my looks.

Yoo Jieun isn’t even using her camera.

Thinking that, I queued up for the next game.

– YooJieunJieunJieunYoo

“…Huh, is that Jieun unnie?”

The ADC on the opposing team was Yoo Jieun. She must have started a match as soon as she went live.

It’s not that surprising, since the people in this rank are always the same.

So, as usual, I checked her recent match history.

“…Wait. Is she just one win away from Challenger?”

…

When did she climb this much?

In the past, when talking about VALORANT, she did mention that her form had really improved.

And now she’s even higher-ranked than the host, huh? Haha.

I tried my best to ignore the comment and gripped my mouse.

• First blood.
• Enemy double kill.

“What? Already?”

It hadn’t even been three minutes, and there was already a victory cheer from the bot lane.

Of course, it was the enemy team.

Our bot lane never wins.

“Jieun unnie shouldn’t be getting double kills, though.”

That girl may have bad luck with teams, but honestly, her carry potential is impressive.

It’s bad if she gets that many kills.

The viewers chimed in.

– Whoa, that play was insane. You should see her stream right now—she’s on fire.

And just like that, fifty more viewers left my stream.

I pressed my lips together and kept moving my mouse.

• Enemy is unstoppable.
• Enemy is legendary.

“…No way.”

– Did you see that movement?
– Queen unnie.
– Queen Jieun.

What was that?

• Enemy quadra kill.
• Enemy penta kill.
• Game over.
• Defeat

– Wow.
– That was insane. Haha.
– Her mechanics are off the charts..

“…Ah…”

I really tried my best.

But I just couldn’t stop the snowball from that bot lane double kill.

I let out a big sigh, glanced at the chat window, and then leaned back in my chair, not feeling like typing anything.

– Breaking news: Viewer count drops!

I pretended not to see that message, switched screens, and searched for Yoo Jieun’s channel on Twitch again.

• 1,000 viewers.

And my viewer count was down to 900.

“Everyone… is Jieun unnie’s stream that fun?”

I casually asked, twirling a strand of my hair.

– Yeah, it’s awesome.

“What’s so great about it?”

– Careful, this feels like a trap, haha.
– Haha, true.

“No, seriously, I’m just curious. It’s not like I’d get mad if you watch her. We’re super close, after all.”

– Well, first of all, her voice is really nice.
– So calm and she never gets angry, not even once.
– She’s supposedly doing it as a hobby, but she’s incredibly talented.

A hobby?

I do this full-time.

Shouldn’t I be better?

…

And yet, they’ve never called me “unnie.”

“Why don’t you call me unnie?”

– Should do something unnie-like to be called unnie, haha.
– Jieun unnie is just unnie; you’re just the host.

I worked hard to keep my expression in check.

Showing a sulky face here would definitely get me teased.

But despite my effort…

– Wait, is she actually sulking?
– Haha, she’s so cute when she’s sulking.
– Alright, let’s all go watch Jieun unnie’s stream now.
– I’m going too, haha.
– You’re second string now; Jieun unnie is first string.

They’ve got something on me now.

Now that they know, they’re definitely going to keep doing it, even if I ask them to stop.

“Well, whatever… Go on, then. It’s not like I care. Who do they think they are…”

I tried to act unbothered and queued up for another VALORANT match.

One minute.

Two minutes.

Three minutes.

The longer it took to find a match, the worse my mood got.

I switched screens again and secretly searched for Yoo Jieun’s stream.

Even though she wasn’t using her webcam, her viewer count was still higher than mine.

I wondered how high it would go if she turned her cam on.

No, this is just an initial spike. It’ll die down soon.

…

When I was beating myself up over what to say to her, donations flooded in on Yoo Jieun’s stream.

User 1834 donated 30,000 won.
“I’m new here, but it’s really fun! I’ll come often. Haha.”

…That person used to donate on my stream.

Little by little, I really started to feel bad.

My body felt warm, and my head was tingling.

I spoke in a slightly sulky voice.
“Guys, go watch Jieun unnie’s stream. It looks fun.”

I should go watch too, haha.

– Hey, stop teasing. Can’t you see the host’s face?
– Honestly, unnie is a broadcasting genius; she’s just naturally talented.
– Taking away the fact that she’s a girl, she’s just super fun.

That witty banter…

I stared blankly at the chat when one nickname caught my eye.

The one who said they’d go watch was someone who had been chatting since my first stream.

I tried to act nonchalant.
I’m fine.
I’m fine.
…I’m fine.

“Ugh.”
What?
Why am I crying?

Tears streamed down—first from my right eye, then my left.

As soon as I realized they were tears, the sobs suddenly erupted.
“Ugh… Huuh…”

– Why are you crying?

“Hey, stop teasing me!”
These little jerks are really getting to me. Haha, they’ve managed to make me cry.

Once the tears started flowing, they wouldn’t stop.

Tears during crying feel stickier and hotter than tears from yawning.
Hot, sticky tears kept dripping down.

“I’m… not crying. I just yawned.”
I was lying, and it wasn’t working.

– Don’t cry.
– I’m sorry, my pretty girl; it was just a joke, I’m sorry.

Sigh.

Suddenly, my feelings of hurt burst out in response to the comforting chat messages.

“Ugh… I, I…”

I started to express my true feelings.

“I, ugh, you all know that I care about you. Why do you do this? Sob…”

“Why do you keep saying that?”

I said, choking on my words.

“Don’t go… ugh… focus on my stream… just look at me…”

After crying for a while and reading the messages of comfort and support, I finally calmed down.

Just like before, I started to write words above my webcam.

…

The appearance in the webcam below was a mess. My eyes were unbelievably red.

What is this?

What am I doing?

Ignoring those comments, I wrote:

No cheating.

“From now on, no cheating is allowed.”

– What is this?
– Haha.

I ignored the chat responses that were incredulous.

“I remember almost all the usernames of those who chat frequently, and if I see them in Jieun unnie’s chatroom, I’ll ban them from chatting here.”

“That’s how it goes.”

– ??
– This is completely ridiculous, haha.

As I realized that I was feeling better, the viewers started chatting again like before.

– What? If you’re jealous, just create two accounts. That should work, right?

I swiftly turned my head to the side.

Ignoring the unfolding chat, I thought, that serves you right.

“I’m just kidding. You can watch unnie’s stream too. How could I say otherwise…”

“But instead, please like me the most. If you do, I’ll forgive you even if you cheat.”