Feelings That Melt Away

I sat blankly at the desk in front of the director’s office, sipping an iced Americano.

The moment I thought I shouldn’t be like this,

the director walked in with quick steps.

I hurriedly stood up, hiding my coffee and greeting him,

but his indifferent glance passed me by.

The office door opened wide and then shut.

Through the narrowing gap, his broad back disappeared in an instant.

I stared at the firmly closed door and slowly sat back down.

I pushed the unfinished coffee completely under the desk.

Even if lunch break wasn’t over yet,

this wasn’t a place to sit and sip coffee.

I knew that, but my mind felt scattered.

I picked up the cup one last time and opened the lid.

I put a piece of ice into my mouth and chewed it.

I need to get myself together.

The director giving me that hint was both kindness and something natural.

What use was it for a beta man to like him.

The glass doors, desks, tall plants I passed on the way to his office—

it was no different from those things liking him.

My feelings, colorless and scentless,

unable to exchange pheromones or tempt him,

would mean nothing to him.

It was only my own problem

to overinterpret his indifferent reaction and feel like my world was collapsing.

So this is what unrequited love feels like.

Looking at the closed door,

I crushed and swallowed my chaotic emotions.

Along with the ice.

Like ice, they would melt away without a trace.

It was a Friday night without any major incidents, so I got off work on time.

When the director passed by saying he wouldn’t return and we could leave on our own,

I kept my head down for a long time.

Partly to hide my embarrassment.

And because he had pointed out that my expressions were obvious.

Summer was fading.

Even though I was leaving early,

it was already getting dark outside.

As we rode the elevator down, Nara asked.

“What are you doing this weekend?”

“I have a lot to sort out, so I’ll just rest. What about you?”

“Hmm… maybe I’ll watch a movie.”

The manager said she would visit her mother.

Assistant Kang had a reunion and other plans.

Everyone seemed to have a full weekend ahead.

As more people got on the elevator,

we stopped talking.

When we reached the lobby, we removed our ID cards and said goodbye.

“See you.”

“Next week.”

Nara paused in front of me as if she had something to say,

but then just wished me a good weekend and walked away.

I returned the greeting and headed toward the bus stop.

I’m tired.

I’ll go home, clean up, and sleep.

As soon as I entered my room,

I was greeted by clothes scattered like shed skin.

I wanted to collapse on the bed,

but the mess made me feel uneasy.

So I shoved the clothes into the washing machine

and even cleaned the room—something I couldn’t do during weekdays.

After vacuuming and wiping the floor,

the empty room revealed itself.

I didn’t own many things to begin with.

A wardrobe, desk, and bed lined one wall,

and opposite them were the fridge, sink, and washing machine.

Not large, but it looked spacious because of how little there was.

While the laundry ran,

I wandered around aimlessly

and noticed the books on my shelf.

I pulled out a chair and sat down.

Running my hand along the faded spines,

I picked one up.

They were old textbooks, long outdated.

Next to them were novels and essays I had collected.

There had been no new additions for about a year.

It wasn’t that I was too busy—

I had simply lost interest in books.

After joining the company on the director’s suggestion,

and developing these feelings…

I pulled out a novel absentmindedly.

As I flipped through it,

a business card slipped out.

A clean white card, still crisp,

with black lettering and a dark green company name.

Jeong Won-woo, Director.

It was the first thing he had ever given me.

He really is bold for someone so young.

What did he see in me to hire me as an assistant.

Or maybe he’s just good at judging people.

After all, I’m working hard and staying loyal.

The washing machine beeped.

I straightened my back and stood up.

After hanging the laundry,

I took a long shower until my hands and feet wrinkled.

Then I crawled into bed.

Let’s sleep.

Starting tomorrow, I’ll go back to the gym I barely use.

Objectively, my life isn’t bad at all.

A stable job, no health issues.

That should be enough, right.

I was too lazy to close the window,

so I pulled the blanket over my face.

My mood settled quickly.

And I fell asleep.

My phone rang.

Thinking it was my morning alarm,

I opened my eyes immediately.

But the ceiling was still dark.

Outside was still night.

Did I set the alarm wrong.

I scratched my head and stretched,

waiting for it to stop.

But it kept ringing,

so I staggered up and looked for my phone.

It was 1 a.m.

And it wasn’t an alarm—it was a call.

From the manager.

She wasn’t someone who called at this hour.

What could it be.

I cleared my voice and answered.

“Yes, manager.”

“Are you home right now?”

“Yes. What’s going on?”

“This isn’t proper, but normally I’d go myself.

I’m in Gangneung right now, visiting my mother.”

“I heard earlier.”

It wasn’t an excuse.

As I rubbed my eyes,

she finally explained urgently.

“The director seems drunk.

He’s looking for someone to drive him.”

“But doesn’t he have a driver…”

“The usual one is unavailable.

He doesn’t want it reaching the chairman.

He went to some gathering with wealthy families,

and something must have happened.

I thought of calling Kang, but… you seemed better.”

“Me?”

It wasn’t protest—just confusion.

Kang usually handled things like this.

Still, I felt like I should go.

“It’s a messy situation.

Pheromones everywhere—alphas and omegas.

He’s probably irritated.

Kang is affected by pheromones,

but you’re not.

I’ll treat you when I get back.”

“No, it’s fine. I’ll go. Send me the location.”

She thanked me repeatedly and sent the address.

I replied asking her not to treat me.

Why do people think that’s a reward.

Instant noodles at home are much better.

I’d rather just get an early day off.

Grand Park Hotel Lounge.

Not enough information.

I quickly got dressed,

throwing on semi-formal clothes without thinking.

The hotel was crowded with people enjoying the weekend.

As I stepped out of the taxi and walked in,

I couldn’t help but notice their outfits.

Women wore tight dresses and high heels.

Men looked perfectly groomed.

I approached a staff member but hesitated,

then called the manager again.

She answered immediately.

“Where did you say you were?”

“Is there a basement?”

“Is there a lounge downstairs?”

“The lounge is on the 28th floor.

The basement is a club.”

The staff’s voice must have been heard,

because the manager changed her instructions.

“Check the club rooms in the basement.

I’m trying to call him, but he’s not answering.”

“I’ll go down.”

I didn’t even wait for the elevator.

I took the wide stairs down.

Beyond the marble floor,

the club entrance was open.

Heavy bass echoed through the space.

Dodging a staggering man,

I went inside,

but it was too loud to stay on the call.

I hung up and moved deeper inside.

Where is he.

Avoiding the crowded hall,

I entered a dimly lit corridor on the right.

A staff member stopped me.

“Someone asked for you to be brought in.”

“Who?”

“Well…”

“What room number?”

“….”

I stopped myself from saying his name

and instead called him directly.

He didn’t answer twice.

On the third attempt,

the call finally connected.

The noise was deafening.

I covered one ear and spoke into the phone.

“Director.”

“Assistant Yoon?”

“The manager couldn’t come, so I came instead.”

“Do you know where you are?”

“In front of a room in the basement club.

Aren’t you here?”

“Wait there.”