“Eh heh, mm—” I sprawled on the floor, my hips raised high. “Why won’t it ever plug in?”
I gazed at the port ahead with a solemn expression; it seemed incredibly tight. Applying a slight force, which, given my strength, was more than enough, it clicked into place with a satisfying “ka.”
Indeed, it proved my theory: there was nothing that couldn’t be solved with brute force. If something remained unresolved, it only meant one hadn’t been violent enough.
****
With the equipment now ready, it looked undeniably cool, resembling a high-tech control panel.
A series of hosts pulsed with blue light. To facilitate gaming, I had specifically converted a bedroom, now boasting three computers with varying specifications and several monitors.
Adding a few cameras to the setup made the entire station appear truly spectacular.
****
6:24 PM
Still some time. Oh, right, I needed to change clothes.
I picked up the maid outfit, slipped it onto my arm, and *whoosh*, it promptly slid right off.
“Hmm?” I tilted my head in confusion. “Clipping through? No, that’s not right; I’m a god, not a 3D computer model.”
Suddenly, I realized the problem: the outfit seemed far too large.
I stood frozen for a moment, feeling a pallor wash over me. ‘So, even among girls, I’m considered small….’
However, despite having my intelligence ‘nerfed,’ I was still a male god with an IQ of 250. Could such a trivial matter truly stump a divine being like me?
With ease, I used a few clothespins to secure the garment. ‘Hmph, see? It fits perfectly now.’
****
6:50 PM
I clicked open my streaming page. Though I hadn’t even started broadcasting, the viewer count had already reached 740,000, and it was climbing at an alarming rate. Typically, my streams only attracted around two million viewers.
‘It’s probably Cute Little Fanboy, that little rascal, who’s lured a bunch of clueless forum newbies here for a “pilgrimage.”’
“Tsk, tsk,” I tutted, clicking my tongue. ‘It seems that if I hadn’t been tricked by a certain unscrupulous agent, this whole situation might have been difficult to resolve.’
‘Was this a blessing in disguise? Did thinking this way mean I was just giving up entirely?’
****
6:58 PM
The number hit 1.97 million. It was a little daunting.
However, no matter how many people watched my stream, I never felt nervous. In real life, on the other hand, I’d likely become incoherent if even a single person tried to chat with me.
‘Perhaps this nervousness stemmed from my own insecurity and an excessive demonization of human nature….’
Still, I held a slight anticipation for this broadcast. How many people would tune in? What would their reactions be?
A small thrill ran through me.
****
7:00 PM
I pressed the broadcast button, and as always, a one-minute introductory video began to play.
A large “Dream” character materialized in the center of the screen, accompanied by my pre-recorded voice.
“Today’s stream arrives as scheduled, and the world’s most handsome, most eloquent, most skilled, and most perceptive super streamer, Big Dream Lord, is about to begin broadcasting!”
Cute Little Fanboy had actually created this video. Initially, I found it incredibly awkward, but after watching it countless times, my skin had thickened, and it no longer bothered me.
“However, this time, I will be making my first public appearance! Prepare your tissues, the broadcast is about to begin!”
The original line for that last part had been: “As usual, I won’t allow you to gaze upon me this time either. Go fantasize on your own! Prepare your tissues, the broadcast is about to begin!”
As expected, the chat was flooded with comments like, “As expected of the Scummy Dream!”
“Isn’t this Moe God? I think it’s Scummy God!”
“No matter how many times I watch this, I still want to punch you!” and so on.
I nodded with satisfaction. ‘Ah, the usual atmosphere.’ After the intro video, they would always spend a few minutes cursing before settling down.
I understood, of course, that they weren’t truly cursing me. Men, after all, often exchanged playful jabs; it was a sign of intimacy.
The hallmark of my stream was constant banter with my fans, then trash-talking opponents, then trash-talking the entire world, all in an act of social retribution.
****
“Ahem, ahem, you’re all just jealous of my dashing looks and charming demeanor,” I coughed, speaking in my usual cheeky tone as I simultaneously activated the webcam.
The live stream interface was now smaller than before, as a dedicated section on the right had opened up, displaying footage from three different cameras.
A cute, blonde loli sat in a gaming chair, wearing a loose-fitting maid outfit and grinning mischievously.
The stream chat fell silent for a moment, then erupted in chaos.
“Exited to check if I entered the wrong stream +1”
“Exited to check if I entered the wrong stream +1”
“Exited to check if I entered the wrong stream +10086”
“This isn’t a substitute streamer, is it?”
“So this is Moe God’s true form! Truly worthy of the name Moe God!”
“Definitely a boy! Girls aren’t *that* cute!”
Honestly, I couldn’t blame them for their disbelief. Would *you* believe that a perpetually narcissistic, foul-mouthed, seemingly middle-aged perverted uncle, who talked about everything from life to women, was actually a vibrant, adorable, and super beautiful young loli?
You wouldn’t believe it either, would you? Though, even before becoming a god, I wasn’t a perverted uncle—at most, I was an overgrown shota.
Had I not become a god, I certainly wouldn’t have been able to discern so many chat messages at once.
They largely fell into three categories: mindless “moe” spam, “wrong stream” comments, questions about a substitute streamer, and queries about whether I was a boy or a girl.
****
I cleared my throat twice more.
“Firstly, if anyone keeps spamming ‘wrong stream,’ I’ll mute you, ‘yo’!” As soon as I finished, a bewildered expression crossed my face. ‘What was with that “yo”? I’m a grown man….’
“Next, please stop spamming ‘moe.’ I know I’m cute.” ‘Indeed, if Moe God isn’t cute, then who is? A wave of profound sorrow washed over me. If they were spamming “handsome,” I absolutely wouldn’t stop them.’
Normally, if I declared, “I know I’m awesome, I know I’m handsome,” I’d be showered with insults about being a narcissist for half an hour. Yet this time, they didn’t refute me, which brought another pang of sadness. ‘Why did I, as a boy, never receive such treatment? Heaven is unfair! I shall defy the heavens!’
‘Ah, wait, no. Aren’t I part of the heavens now? Alright, I retract that statement.’
“Am I a boy using a voice changer now, or was I a girl using a voice changer before? You guess,” I said, a touch sullenly, not wanting to dwell on the issue too much.
After all, it wasn’t a particularly pleasant topic. Frankly, everything about this form was delightful, except for the gender and height.
“Finally, for those suspecting a substitute streamer, just look at my hands on the second camera. If you’re unconvinced, then just watch.”
There were three things I absolutely could not tolerate:
1. Not sleeping or eating well.
2. Being told my skills were bad, that I used hacks, or that someone else was playing for me.
3. And most importantly, you could call me ugly, that was fine, but if you called me short, it was war.
****
Afterward, I asked as usual, “What game would you like me to play? Feel free to suggest anything; I probably won’t be good at it anyway.”
Yet, the chat remained eerily silent, even as the number of viewers continued to climb.
What I didn’t realize was that if I were merely a cute girl in my true form, the reaction wouldn’t have been so intense. They were simply stunned by the fact that I was a girl.
However, I was a god, and specifically, Moe God.
Portraits of deities inherently carry a divine radiance, often imbued with the deity’s own divine will. A live stream image, being a form of indirect portrait, naturally possessed some of this divine will.
Though unaware they were directly facing a true god, under the influence of the divine radiance, they involuntarily developed a sense of reverence and a desire to proselytize.
Consequently, the viewer count soared even faster, yet they remained utterly silent, without a single chat message. It was quieter than my very first stream.
“No one’s talking?” I wondered, perplexed. It was incredibly strange to see a stream with over seven million viewers, yet complete silence in the chat.
Moreover, despite the lack of conversation, gifts were continuously pouring in with a rapid *thump-thump-thump*. It was truly bizarre.
‘Ever since I became a goddess, everyone around me has started acting so strangely.’
With no one speaking, I mused aloud, “Shall I play some battle royale then?”
A profound silence answered me.
I launched the game, utterly bewildered. ‘What on earth was going on today? Everyone was acting like gentlemen. Where were those who usually joined me in spouting vulgarities?’
Strange as it was, the stream had to continue, especially with so many people watching.
****
Battle Royale, as its name suggested, was a survival game where 100 players battled each other on an island.
Players utilized various weapons and vehicles found on the map to eliminate enemies, while safe zones gradually appeared, inflicting damage on anyone outside them.
The condition for victory was simple: survive until the very end, by any means necessary.
This game, with its straightforward rules, offered immense replayability and high viewership appeal for streams, making it incredibly popular within the streaming community.
Unfortunately, despite mastering almost every other game, I simply couldn’t get the hang of FPS (First-Person Shooter) games. Yet, I still found them incredibly fun.
Normally, the chat would be flooded with comments like, “Delivery person Moe God is online!” but this time, the chat remained silent.
‘What the hell? Am I seeing ghosts?’ I stared at the completely silent chat, while gifts continued to pour in relentlessly. Many other streamers were even doing live “raid” checks on my channel.
In truth, it wasn’t that they didn’t want to speak; they simply didn’t know *what* to say. My divine radiance had unconsciously created a sense of distance between us.
Instead, they were using gifts, much like offerings, to express their… what was it again? ‘Ah, right, their reverence.’
‘No, I absolutely have to find a way to liven up the atmosphere. This is utterly mortifying.’