Chapter 4: The Routine Chaos of a Magical Girl’s Life

Watching a magical girl anime with an empty mind and a full belly of chicken. Even though two people attacked a whole chicken, half of it remained uneaten, unable to be fully consumed by the weak stomach of an elementary school student. The leftover chicken was meant for the mascots before it got cold.

“Ahh.”

The combination of greasy chicken and refreshing soda produced a cool, satisfying sound that escaped from within. As if this refreshing exclamation was a signal, Siyeon’s snake-like mascot and the bear cub began to creep toward the chicken box. The reason for ordering boneless chicken, in particular, was to make it easier for these two to eat. Despite looking like they could live on air alone, they were bizarre creatures who craved human food.

“I want the fried one.”

“Wow, you left so much…”

These are the world’s first dolls that eat chicken. Broadly speaking, could they be considered waste disposers? ‘Well, it’s practical.’ They don’t consume electricity or need batteries. As I gazed intently at the back of the bear cub, Siyeon’s mascot stared right back at me. Following that gaze, the bear cub, who was busy gobbling down chicken, looked back at me and spoke.

“Wh-What is it?”

“No, it’s nothing. I just thought you guys would be perfect as waste disposers.”

“Really?!”

I bet they’d become a must-have item for housewives. No food waste, and they keep you company too—how great is that?

Once they finished clearing the leftovers, I folded the grease-stained chicken box neatly and poured the chicken radish juice down the sink. Given my condition, it’s impossible to stay up all night.

“Yaaawn…”

How long has it been since I ate the chicken? I yawned widely as drowsiness, threatening to overwhelm me, swept over my body. Siyeon, who was hugging the snake mascot as a pillow, slept quietly on the first floor of the bunk bed. Watching her, I climbed the stairs leading to the second floor of the bed. The bear cub, lying smack in the center of my bed, was occupying the space. Without a second thought, I grabbed it with one hand and threw it over the side of the bed.

“Ugh!”

‘How dare a beast lie on a person’s bed…’

After finishing the climb, I collapsed onto the soft bed. Barely a few minutes after closing my eyes, the seemingly endless night was broken by the sound of the default alarm from my smartphone. I turned off the alarm by swiping the X mark and briefly sighed with my eyes closed.

“Ah.”

Lying in bed and sluggishly moving around, a sigh unintentionally escaped my lips. The meaning behind that sigh was so obvious that it didn’t even need an explanation.

‘…I don’t want to go to school.’

“Yaaawn.”

And so began the walk to elementary school, marked by Siyeon’s yawn. To think it all starts again from here. How many more years do I have to wake up early in the morning? Upon arriving at school, I sat down, hung my bag next to my desk, and got ready for another day.

A magical girl with no parents, yet she has the surname Kim. Due to the unfair rule of alphabetical order, she couldn’t even sit at the back if she wanted to. She’s stuck in the front row, right next to the teacher’s desk.

“Just my luck.”

With a heart full of complaints, she slumped over her desk as soon as she arrived at school, trying to soak up what little freedom she could before class began. Why couldn’t she just change her last name since she doesn’t have parents anyway? It’s a half-baked world, so why can’t they let this one slide?

“Hey! Kim Mari! Where’s the tteokbokki?”

“They called her Kim Mari—Kim Mari—”

*Sigh*, stupid kids.

Everyday life in elementary school. Teasing people about their names. They never seem to get tired of making fun of her for the same thing every single day. The boys in her class are even more annoying than monsters. At least with monsters, she can hit them until her stress goes away, but she can’t do that with these boys, which makes it even more frustrating. If she beats them up, their parents might come to school, making things even more annoying.

“This doesn’t need to be realistic.”

*Yawn.*

She sighed as she muttered to herself, whether they called her “Kim Mari” or “Shrimp Tempura.” It seems like the magical girl powers have their limits too. Was it in kindergarten? She once beat up a boy who made fun of her name, only to get chewed out by his annoying mom. She still remembers that conversation vividly. The mom, not knowing how to discipline her own child, demanded to see her parents right away. In response, she had said, “Why are you looking for something I don’t have?” That almost set off the woman, who nearly turned the kindergarten upside down with her shouting. She’d also added, “It’s because of people like you that child-free zones exist.” Looking back, it wasn’t the kind of thing a kid her age should have said. At the time, she was just learning how to act her age, so it’s not like she could help it, but…

“It was a bit harsh.”

She didn’t know that the boy’s parents were actually deceased. In retrospect, it was a grand verbal battle between someone who never had parents and someone who had lost them. Anyway, she learned her lesson from that experience and has been living without causing trouble since then. Of course, if she were sure the boys’ parents wouldn’t come, she’d gladly pounce on them and beat them up. But when it comes to name-calling, she’ll let the grown-up inside her hold back.

However, the pure malice of children sometimes breaks even the iron will of the adult within her. After school, during cleaning time. According to the numbers assigned, she picked up a broom and dustpan or a mop and began cleaning. If she tried to escape, her number would still be on the board. As she crouched down to pick up large pieces of trash, a mop dripping with water entered the classroom.

*Splash.* The mop was so wet that it soaked the floor as it moved around.

“Yay—!”

What’s so exciting about that? The kids scurry between the desks, mop in hand, as if it’s some grand adventure. At least they’re motivated, which means it’ll be over faster.

Just as she thought that and started looking at her smartphone…

*Thud,* a dull impact followed by a damp sensation on the top of my head.

“Ah.”

The kid, who had been enthusiastically swinging the mop high into the air, lost control of its weight, and it traced a trajectory straight onto my head.

The mop, still wet and heavy with leftover water, had bits of sandy dirt clinging to it, which now rained down from my hair.

‘…??’

For a moment, my mind went blank. But even so, I understood the situation perfectly.

Yeah, they’re just kids, they can make mistakes… a few slip-ups here and there.

But will this fist of mine forgive you?

My body, not quite as understanding, started to swing my fist in a perfect arc.

At that moment, the thread of reason that had temporarily vanished returned to connect with my mind again. A command to adjust my aim and avoid delivering a knockout blow to his face.

“Ack!”

Fortunately, my fist landed on his right chest, and I walked out of the classroom, trying to figure out what to do with my dirt-covered, sopping wet head.

As soon as I entered the bathroom, I struggled to wash off the sandy dirt clinging to my scalp with the water from the not-so-clean school bathroom.

Having long hair because I was too lazy to cut it short felt like a real hassle at times like this.

‘I messed up.’

Regret hit me late.

I just hoped that kid’s mom wasn’t a clueless troublemaker.

I felt stuffy and bitter inside.

Maybe I should grab a candy on the way back.

Siyeon, who was in a different class, was waiting for me at the school gate until the cleaning was finished.

Of course, Siyeon asked why my hair was wet, and I explained what had happened during cleaning time to satisfy her curiosity.

“So, did you hit him?”

“Yeah.”

I nonchalantly answered as I popped a strawberry-flavored lollipop I bought from a nearby stationery store into my mouth.

It was already a thing of the past.

A man doesn’t regret trivial things from the past.

…Or maybe I should, just this once?

Hearing my casual response, Siyeon looked troubled.

“What are you going to do now…?”

“When I came to my senses, my fist was already flying.”

I looked at my tightly clenched right hand, lifting one corner of my mouth into a half-smile, as if to say it was inevitable.

Siyeon, who had been troubled, now looked almost exasperated as she muttered useless advice to an incorrigible case.

“You shouldn’t be proud of that….”

Ah, the candy is sweet.

Strawberry flavor, as expected.

“Mari, you’re not listening, are you?”

“Of course not.”

“Sigh….”

Making an elementary schooler sigh—I’m impressive.

When we got back to the apartment, everything was the same as usual.

Other elementary schoolers might be sent off to various after-school programs or taekwondo classes, causing a big fuss, but…

That doesn’t apply to us.

“Fighting monsters requires highly skilled individuals?

Even highly skilled individuals have their days off.

A day without monsters is a holiday.

‘No monsters today, huh?’

I heard Siyeon muttering while lying on the top bunk, legs crossed.

‘Don’t say things like that. Words have power.’

I scolded Siyeon, who uttered something ominous, by quoting a proverb.

I chewed on the leftover candy stick, grateful for a monster-free day.

…Until that night.

‘Miss Mari, Miss Mari.’

‘Ah… for fuck’s sake, you bastard.’

Along with the voice of that damned bear, a light as bright as the sun blinded me.

This crazy bear had shone a flashlight directly into my eyes.

Even the most worthless fool wouldn’t shine a flashlight into someone’s eyes.

But this damn bear managed to pull it off.

‘A monster has appea… a chicken?!’

The bear’s voice twisted as my fingers tightened around its neck.

I couldn’t resist strangling him.

‘Monster or whatever, you little shit, do you want to go rafting on the Styx with Charon?’