System Maintenance

“Haha, it’s a misunderstanding.”

“That’s what everyone says when they get caught.”

“Oh dear, it really is a misunderstanding, my husband.”

After getting smacked on the back of the head and falling off me, the man suddenly lifted me up and sat me on top of him.

The moment I landed on his firm thigh, I flinched reflexively.

“Don’t believe that sly creature.”

Worried that reacting too strongly might look strange, I consciously stiffened my body.

But Kaliban went even further and wrapped an arm around my waist.

Why is it so thick?

It’s like a damn python.

“Who exactly is that ‘sly creature’ you’re talking about?”

“How cruel, my husband. Pretending not to understand what I’m saying. Has that thing already captured that much of your heart?”

No, seriously—who exactly is that thing?

“……”

Anyway, after waking up and immediately bickering with that chaotic nonhuman, the uneasy feeling from earlier faded a little.

“Hey, let me lean for a bit.”

Sadly, my physical condition hadn’t improved along with my mood.

I had barely climbed down from his lap before going limp again.

Seeing that, Kaliban readily offered me his back.

“As much as you like. For you only, this Kaliban is available free of charge.”

“I’m not buying.”

“It’s free.”

“I said I’m not buying. You’re the type who gets people to download something because it’s free, then sells DLC afterward.”

Even while saying that, I leaned against him anyway.

It was surprisingly comfortable.

“How do you feel?”

I was leaning against Kaliban and staring blankly at the greenhouse ceiling when he suddenly asked.

Still looking upward, I answered.

“Not great.”

“Haha, you were groaning in your sleep.”

“While I was sleeping?”

I wondered if that was why he woke me up.

Though his method wasn’t exactly ideal.

“Well, it’s no wonder you had bad dreams.”

Kaliban leaned his back against mine as he said that, and I missed my chance to complain.

“Your body’s still pretty stiff.”

“…No it’s not.”

I swallowed dryly without realizing it, then felt confused afterward.

Why did I do that?

I told Kaliban it wasn’t true, but even to me it was obvious that my body had tensed up.

Even though there was no reason for it.

“Haha, if you hide it even from me, I’ll feel hurt, darling. I’m not your enemy.”

“You’re not exactly an ally either.”

“And besides, you still had plenty of reasons to be tense.”

At that, I frowned reflexively.

From the floor to the ceiling, golden jewel flowers had grown like vines, spreading upward like umbrellas and covering the greenhouse roof.

Looking at them, I spoke.

“That’s true.”

“How much do you remember?”

Since I had lost consciousness at the end, it was a natural question.

“Imok… that bastard…”

Last time I remembered the flowers being mostly blue gemstones.

Now the entire greenhouse was gold.

Maybe Kaliban redecorated it all the time.

“Hey, you bastard.”

Thinking that suddenly made the nonhuman sitting in front of me seem extremely suspicious.

Combined with what had happened before I lost consciousness, irritation welled up.

That’s why I suddenly cursed in the middle of speaking.

“Don’t you guys have any professional developers? Professional developers? What kind of joke is a time-limited item?”

“Hahaha.”

“I went through hell to find that relic, and it turns out to be a time-limited item. Are you kidding me?”

I wanted to roll over immediately and strangle this scammer, but I held back.

The spot where our backs touched was warm, and the back I leaned on was firm and comfortable.

That’s the only reason.

“I was wondering what you were upset about. It’s a misunderstanding, darling.”

“A misunderstanding?”

“Yeah. A misunderstanding caused by not reading the manual carefully.”

Kaliban declared smoothly.

“It’s not a time-limited item, darling. The legacy applied properly.”

I frowned.

Properly applied?

“Then why did a time limit appear?”

“Well, if there’s a problem, it’s more like… specifications.

When you play a game, there are system requirements, right?

If a game recommends a CPU i7 and 8GB of memory, what happens if you run it on the minimum specs?”

“It lags, the graphics break, or it crashes.”

I answered reflexively—then realized something.

“…You’re saying I’m the problem?”

I turned my body abruptly and raised my voice, but immediately groaned.

Kaliban had turned around too, as if expecting it, and our faces almost collided.

“Haha, don’t get too excited. That’s just how things are for now.”

We barely avoided bumping into each other, but our noses brushed.

For a moment, my stomach twisted strangely.

“Who knows what will happen later. So don’t get too angry, darling. Haha.”

“Who said I was angry?”

“Then why do you keep leaning back?”

Kaliban grabbed my elbow and pulled me toward him as he spoke.

While my body was dragged forward, my head pulled back instinctively and I frowned.

Why is he the one trying so hard to stay this close?

Maybe it’s just the attitude he’s used to when dealing with nonhumans.

“Anyway, there’s no need to worry. Lack of specs is something that resolves naturally as you progress through quests.”

“Says the guy whose shop doesn’t even sell specs.”

Still, it was better news than ‘It was a one-time time-limited item.’

“So, has the misunderstanding been cleared up? Since it’s our rare interview time, any other questions?”

“As if I wouldn’t have any.”

Of course I had questions.

There were so many piled up that I couldn’t even count them.

“……”

“Darling?”

“…I can’t think of any right now.”

It felt like my mind had been bleached blank.

No questions came to mind.

“Hm.”

After observing me, Kaliban hummed meaningfully and then lightly tapped his forehead against mine.

“What was that?”

“Looks like you’re still not in great shape.”

I struggled instinctively, but Kaliban’s hand had already moved behind my head, preventing me from pulling away.

I ended up staring at his face from extremely close range.

“Hm. Hmm. Hm.”

Kaliban’s face moved slightly as he inspected me closely.

His sharp jawline and the faint curve of his nose kept shifting within my view.

At least he was wearing his hood.

That guy’s face is a bit too much to handle.

Strangely, my ears started heating up.

Then even the back of my neck felt warm.

Maybe my condition really wasn’t great, just like Kaliban said.

“Why exactly is my condition bad anyway?”

So I asked.

There was still a lot I needed to do, so I figured I should know precisely.

“You ran a program your current body couldn’t handle and then forced it to shut down. Of course you wouldn’t feel good afterward.”

“A forced shutdown.”

So that’s what fainting counts as.

Not wrong, I guess.

While I was contemplating the meaning of a forced shutdown, Kaliban’s finger slid under my chin.

My chin lifted slightly.

“Darling.”

I had a strong feeling Kaliban was smiling with narrowed eyes as he looked down at me.

“So you might need a little after-service.”

“After-service?”

The path his finger traced beneath my chin felt strangely ticklish, making me frown.

Thankfully, I could still curl my toes without him noticing.

Did I suddenly become ticklish…?

Or maybe it’s just a PC trait.

“Explain. What kind of after-service are you talking about?”

“To repeat what I said earlier—me climbing on top of you while you were asleep was really just your misunderstanding.”

“Oh really.”

“I was only checking your condition.”

“So what’s the diagnosis, technician?”

“Remember the time you fell into the Rift after using an unfinished item?”

That instantly cleared my foggy senses.

“You’re saying that could’ve happened again?”

The current candidate is close to the Rift.

So that’s why that notification appeared?

“……”

“Your Majesty?”

“I’m listening.”

“Haha, so obedient. Reflecting on your mistakes? That’s cute.”

“I didn’t order any nonsense, sir. Stop barking.”

After thinking for a moment, I asked.

“So basically, my condition got bad because my body was overworked, right?”

“It was pretty close to the edge.”

“Then what does that have to do with you messing with me? When I woke up, and even now.”

There was a reason I said that.

The hand that had been under my chin earlier was now gripping it lightly.

His hand holding my chin so I couldn’t move.

His face far too close.

At this point it almost looked like…

Like he was about to kiss me.

Of course, since humans don’t interest him at all, there’s no way he’s doing this because he actually wants to kiss me.

“What’s with this pose?”

“I told you. After-service.”

“Why would you even do that?”

“Well, let’s call it customer service for not explaining the manual properly.”

So he meant the relic again.

The one that required absurdly high specs—

No, wait. He said it wasn’t time-limited.

But Kaliban shrugged and corrected himself.

“Actually, that was only partly an excuse.”

“An excuse?”

My chest tightened strangely.

What now?

“It would be troublesome if another Rift opened. The system’s condition could get worse.”

“…Figures.”

Just as I thought.

The swelling feeling inside my chest deflated instantly.

“So I thought I’d offer a special service.”

“Can I request one?”

“Haha, no.”

This bastard.

“I’ll just fix your damaged body a little.”

Annoyed, I decided to push him away.

The moment I placed my hand against his chest—

“!”

Kaliban’s face suddenly came closer.

Something touched my lower lip.

Something soft and slightly cool.

I froze completely.

“Your head feels a bit clearer now, right?”

After a moment, Kaliban pulled away and asked.

“Haha, your body must feel lighter too. Look at you, you’ve already lost some weight.”

I regained my senses when Kaliban started poking at my arm—the one that had been pressing against his chest.

“What the hell are you doing?”

“Hahaha, you’re already nothing but bones and skin. If you lose any more weight, that’d be a problem.”

“What am I, a skeleton?”

I pulled my hand away sharply.

This time Kaliban let go without resistance.

“…So, is that after-service thing done now?”

My stomach still felt strange.

Grabbing the spot Kaliban had touched, I stayed silent for a moment before asking.

Since I’m obviously not inside Seonjeong-gong’s territory, there had to be some reason for that sudden kiss.

“Ah, haha, that. Yes, the service is complete. So? How does it feel?”

I checked my condition briefly before answering.

“The throbbing has gotten better.”

I had no idea what the mechanism was, though.

“I’m glad it helped.”

“Yeah, that’s good.”

It really was good.

Considering everything I had to do next, building up fatigue wouldn’t help.

“……”

But for some reason, my mood felt strangely restless.

And I honestly had no idea why.