The Perils of Night Cycling

May 9th, Wednesday, 9:00 p.m.

The clouds had scattered, the stars receded, and the bright moon hung low, casting a gentle glow.

The night streets were thick with fog. Even the streetlights were reduced to mere luminous silhouettes, leaving only the full moon in the sky, untouched by the wisps of mist, to pour its clear light down upon the world.

I pedaled my bicycle with considerable effort, feeling a growing sense of exasperation.

Why on earth am I out cycling at night?

It was so cold. Moreover, my lower half felt particularly chilly.

“Ling Chen, how much further do I have to cycle? Can I at least buy a can of cola?”

Ling Chen had suggested I exercise daily, but I was a homebody who got winded after just a few steps. Other forms of exercise were equally foreign to me.

Truthfully, I was more interested in ball sports, yet I couldn’t even play ping-pong, our national sport. I was utterly useless. The reason stemmed from my childhood; I never had anyone to play with, and all my acquaintances were fellow homebodies, leaving no opportunity for proper practice.

During physical education classes, I would always sit alone, watching other students pour out their youthful sweat. I envied the boys who played basketball or soccer together, but the mere thought of interacting with so many people, and then trying to fit into their established circles, made my stomach ache.

I simply lacked the courage to shamelessly join other groups.

Consequently, the only exercise I was proficient in was cycling. While I initially took up cycling due to the influence of certain anime, I found myself falling in love with the sport once I got the hang of it.

It required no one else; everything was under my own control. That sensation of riding against the wind felt as if I were a wingless bird, enjoying the freedom of solitary flight with limited means.

Everyone is a bird; without wings, they learn to think; because they will eventually die, they learn to fly.

Thus, Ling Chen insisted I cycle for exercise, even following behind me to ensure I wasn’t slacking off.

This is hell!

I shouldn’t have opted for cycling just to save a few hundred yuan on a gym membership.

Outdoor exercise was truly detestable!

“Sister, it’s only been ten minutes since your last break, and you’re already complaining of exhaustion. And of course, cola is out of the question.”

“W-w-w, Ling Chen, can I go back now? There’s an event in my game tonight!”

“No, you must complete these seven kilometers, Sister.”

“Please, I beg you! Look how diligently I’ve been studying these past two days. Can’t you make an exception?”

“Pleading with me is useless; I am currently an emotionless monitoring machine. Also, Sister, your skirt is flying up again!”

“Don’t look!”

Cycling itself was fine, but Ling Chen, that scoundrel, actually made me wear a short skirt to do it.

Initially, I refused to wear a skirt, but he presented an offer I couldn’t decline.

He had stated, “Sister, your wardrobe contains nothing but extremely otaku-like sportswear. If An An were to invite you out shopping, she’d be dressed in fashionable, attractive clothes, while you’d look completely outdated. Even if you’re not embarrassed, An An would be.”

“You have a point. So, what should I do?”

“I don’t expect a sister with a straight man’s aesthetic to dress herself well, but at least learn how girls dress. Here, I’ve already bought you a skirt. Get used to the feeling of wearing one first, Sister.”

“Wearing women’s clothing is a slippery slope; once is never enough. I refuse!”

“That makes things difficult. Never mind, if Sister gets looked down upon, it’s none of my business.”

“Hmph, fine, I’ll wear it!”

“Remember, you have to wear it out too.”

“You might as well kill me!”

“There aren’t many people out at night, Sister, so you needn’t worry. Besides, you can use this opportunity to overcome your sense of shame, lest you become overly anxious in a crowd later.”

He added one last line: “Let us face our fears together and create the future.”

His villainous demeanor made me increasingly uneasy the more I thought about it. When did Ling Chen even buy me a skirt?

And since it’s so prone to exposure, why didn’t he remind me about the wonderful invention of safety shorts?

For men, safety shorts were undoubtedly a regrettable invention, but now I suddenly realized that in this cold world, only safety shorts could bring warmth to girls.

Seriously, it was truly cold under the skirt. Moreover, when I was still a big man, cycling felt normal. Now, my backside ached terribly, a discomfort beyond words.

In short, there was only one truth: Ling Chen was absolutely playing a prank on me.

My gaze stretched along the seemingly endless road ahead, and I spoke with a hint of resignation: “Ling Chen, are you perhaps enjoying yourself a little too much by teasing me?”

“Sister actually noticed! That’s right! Striving not to expose yourself, while also anxiously checking if passersby are looking at you—your shy and modest demeanor is truly amusing.”

“Ahhh, I’m going to kill you when we get back!”

What misfortune! How did I end up with such a sadistic younger brother?

Did he take all the sadist parts, leaving me with only the masochist ones?

No, I’m definitely not a masochist. Look, where’s the enjoyment in any of this?

“…”

Wait, I think I feel something?

No, this is too terrifying. I mustn’t delve deeper, or I’ll discover a new world.

How could I, an iron-willed straight man—no, a straight woman—become a masochist?

The Classic of Poetry states, “When Heaven is wrathful, do not flatter.”

What does “flatter” mean? Flattery means being soft-bodied. Simply put, spineless.

Even the ancients from three thousand years ago disdained spinelessness, so how could I be a masochist?

I had seen through Ling Chen’s true intention; he wanted to control me by demeaning my character. Establishing a persona, exploring traps, becoming obsessed with traps, destroying traps, emotional abuse traps…

Was this the ultimate PUA tactic?

This scoundrel was using such methods on me! Before Ling Chen could corrupt other girls, I decided to righteously eliminate him for the greater good!

Ling Chen sped up, riding beside me. His crimson eyes were fixed intently on the road ahead, a subtle smile playing on his lips.

“It seems I don’t have to worry about such an alert sister being led astray by other men. However, Sister, your paranoia seems to be worsening.”

The wind tousled my hair, making it impossible to keep it in place. It looks like I’ll have to wear a hat next time. No, there wouldn’t be a next time. As a homebody, I should never have trusted Ling Chen’s nonsense.

He claimed that my current delicate state was unacceptable and that I needed to increase my combat strength. Was I supposed to fight strange creatures just because I became a cute girl? Why did I need to increase my combat strength?

I shot him a glance, then leaned down, bent over, and pedaled harder, accelerating.

“You suddenly barged into my life and changed my routine. I don’t fully trust you yet. My brother turning into a living person is too unsettling. Are you sure this isn’t a horror story?”

“In an era where everything can be anthropomorphized, Sister, you still can’t accept this.”

“You’re not a cute girl.”

“Wouldn’t it be a win if Sister became a cute girl?”

“How is that a win for me!”

My skirt was once again blown up by the wind. Ling Chen nodded, his tone devoid of the usual male delight, replaced instead by a gloating tease.

“Mmm-hmm, it’s a win for me.”

There was no sense of shame when my skirt lifted around Ling Chen, much like you wouldn’t feel the need to be ashamed in front of your pet at home. Ling Chen and I were two different species. Cough, cough, I mean, I was human, and he wasn’t.

Even if he wasn’t human, he was truly despicable. I was just frustrated. I’d never even seen “benefits” in my life, yet I’d become Ling Chen’s fan service machine.

“Shut up, you! I shouldn’t have worn blue and white stripes.”

“Isn’t it adorable?”

“I don’t need to be adorable. My image should inspire fear.”

“Sister prefers a Gothic death metal visual-kei style? Hey, wait for me!”

I accelerated. No, time was running out. If I missed this game event, I’d have to wait a year for a rerun.

Any game that could survive a year and maintain its popularity was considered remarkable these days. I’d probably abandon it by next year. To prevent this event from becoming an eternal regret, I had to quickly finish the remaining distance.

However, a single sentence from Ling Chen, whom I had left behind, brought me to a halt. More precisely, a reminder from the system I had almost forgotten made me instinctively stop my current actions.

“Sister, your first job has arrived.”