A Secret Goodbye

After spending the night with Kazen, Eren made up his mind to leave him. So, starting the next day, he began preparing for his solitary farewell.

The first thing he did was settle his wages. Fortunately, he was able to take care of it neatly when he met Hummel, the Clifford Ducal household’s accountant, regarding some tax matters. He sweated profusely, having to come up with plausible excuses to avoid revealing his resignation.

He hadn’t realized it because he’d never had occasion to spend money, but the settlement amount was considerable. When he withdrew it all in cash, it was quite substantial, and he slightly regretted not bringing a bag to carry it.

After that, he went to see Arnold and conveyed his decision to leave. After finalizing the exact date with him, he went to the station and bought a train ticket. Holding the ticket with the date printed on it made the fact that he was leaving the Ducal residence finally sink in.

“The wind has gotten quite cold.”

Eren muttered, pulling his collar tighter to block the blowing wind. The grueling summer had passed, and lonely autumn was just around the corner. The three years he had spent at the Ducal residence felt incredibly distant.

Walking aimlessly, Eren spotted a general store and bought a large traveling bag. He didn’t have much to pack, but he felt he should have at least one.

“Did I buy one that’s too big?”

The bag alone was quite heavy, and he belatedly regretted not buying a smaller one. Still, it felt good to be preparing for a journey.

As he walked down the street carrying the heavy bag with both hands, he noticed a carriage that had been passing by pull over to the side of the road. He was about to glance and walk on when suddenly the carriage window opened and someone shouted.

“Eren!”

At the voice that couldn’t possibly be calling him from the roadside, Eren’s eyes widened like a rabbit’s, and he turned his head. Harold was gesturing from the carriage window.

“Your Highness? Ah, I mean, Mr. Harold.”

How was it possible to run into the Crown Prince on the street so often? He felt he encountered him more frequently than the stray cat he sometimes fed in the garden.

“It’s nice to see you.”

Eren approached him, hiding his bewilderment, and bowed his head.

“It’s nice to see you too. Where were you headed?”

“Ah, well… I was on my way home.”

Not knowing why he was asking, Eren answered cautiously. Harold’s gaze dropped from Eren’s face to the large bag in his hand.

“Your luggage looks heavy. Get in. I’ll give you a ride.”

“No, I wouldn’t want to impose. It’s not far from here.”

“You think I don’t know that? Just get in.”

Harold knocked on the carriage door, and the coachman skillfully dismounted, opened the door, and lowered the steps.

“Do you intend to keep me waiting?”

With Harold pressing him like that, it was difficult to refuse. Eren hesitated, then moved his feet. The coachman skillfully took the bag from Eren’s hand and loaded it.

“Thank you. Then, if you’ll excuse me.”

Bowing politely, he climbed into the carriage, and the coachman closed the door. Then he stood by the window, as if waiting to hear their destination.

“Straight home?”

“Well, I have some time….”

Thinking Harold wanted to stop by a cafe, Eren answered that way. But Harold gave the coachman an unexpected destination.

“Then let’s go to the Imperial Palace.”

“We’re going to the Imperial Palace?”

“Yes. I thought it would be nice for us to take a walk together. Why, do you not have time?”

Looking at Harold’s smiling face, Eren couldn’t bring himself to refuse. He had no urgent matters, either. So, reluctantly, he nodded.

“No, I just need to be back by evening.”

Finally getting Eren’s affirmation, Harold smiled happily and instructed the coachman outside the window.

“So you heard him. To the Imperial Palace.”

“Yes, we’ll depart immediately.”

The coachman, who had been standing like a stone, bowed and climbed back onto the carriage. Soon the wheels began to roll, heading toward the Imperial Palace.

“Judging by that traveling bag, it’s for you, isn’t it? It’s not Kazen’s taste.”

How had he known it wasn’t Kazen’s just by looking at it? Probably because it wasn’t made of the expensive leather Kazen used, but was cheap. That shabby bag had been a considerable splurge for Eren in his own way, so he felt somewhat deflated.

“…Yes, that’s right.”

“Where are you planning to go?”

How much should he tell him honestly? Eren lifted his head and carefully studied Harold’s face, seated across from him.

Compared to Kazen, who had suffered quite a bit from a hangover that morning, Harold looked as refreshed as ever. He wore his usual gentle smile, but deep within his eyes lurked a profound compassion, its depths unfathomable.

Looking into his eyes, Eren couldn’t bring himself to lie. It felt as if he would be committing a sin. Since he had already confided his secret, he decided to simply reveal his plans without hiding them.

“Mr. Harrison introduced me to a magician he knows. So, I’m going to live there, receive treatment, and prepare for the end.”

“Is it a curable disease?”

Harold’s expression brightened momentarily, as if the sun had risen. But at Eren’s following answer, a shadow immediately fell again.

“It will probably be difficult. It’s just something to buy a little more time or reduce the pain. That’s enough.”

Listening to Eren’s resigned reply, Harold let out a small sigh.

“Let’s hope the magician finds a proper solution. If there’s anything I can do to help, please tell me.”

“Your words alone are gratitude enough.”

Looking at his sorrowful expression, Eren grew curious. Why did Harold pay such attention to someone like him?

Come to think of it, Kazen hadn’t liked Harold paying attention to him either, and had acted almost jealous. It made him wonder anew why Harold was so kind to him.

Just as he was about to open his mouth to ask, the carriage came to a stop.

“We’ve arrived at the Imperial Palace. Let’s get out first.”

As soon as the coachman opened the door, the familiar scent of the Imperial Palace’s flowers wafted in. Eren descended from the carriage with slow movements. And out of habit, he extended his hand to help Harold down.

“Are you helping me, too?”

“Ah….”

Harold, finding Eren’s action amusing, asked teasingly but took his hand regardless.

Eren belatedly realized that helping someone out of a carriage was something one might do for a lady. He hadn’t noticed because it was something he habitually did for Kazen.

Whenever he realized that looking after others in daily life had become a habit, like when he’d met Arnold the other day, Eren felt a sense of newness. He already knew well that he was like an accessory attached to Kazen.

“Let’s go. You haven’t seen much of the Imperial Palace, have you?”

“No, I’ve never toured it separately.”

Eren had mostly come to the Imperial Palace to accompany Kazen or handle business matters. So sightseeing had never crossed his mind.

“The Imperial Palace has quite a lot to see. Come. I’ll show you.”

Harold took Eren by the sleeve and gently pulled him. Though slightly uncomfortable, Eren followed behind without a word.

The garden at the front of the Imperial Palace was called ‘Marienner Park’ and was open to the public, so there were quite a few people taking walks. Feeling as if people were recognizing Harold and staring at him, Eren shrank back.

“Kazen doesn’t know anything, does he?”

So focused on their surroundings, Eren didn’t immediately respond to Harold’s question. Only after walking a couple more steps did he answer belatedly.

“Ah, yes. I’m planning to keep it a secret from His Grace.”

“Why aren’t you telling him straight? Are you afraid he might scold you over something like that?”

“Well….”

Trailing off, Eren glanced around once more. Noticing Eren’s discomfort with the crowds, Harold changed direction.

“Let’s go somewhere quiet to talk.”

Did the Imperial Palace even have somewhere quiet? Pushing aside Eren’s doubts, Harold passed through the garden and headed toward the rear garden. The rear garden, which overlooked the Imperial Palace’s banquet hall, was not open to the public and was relatively quiet.

Though the quiet was nice, standing in the rear garden reminded Eren of the time he had witnessed Kazen and Harold’s secret rendezvous, which pained him again.

“Is here alright? There aren’t many people listening, so you can speak freely.”

“Yes, this is fine.”

The spot Harold had found was, coincidentally, the same stone bench where he had sat and spoken with Arnold before. Eren hadn’t expected to sit here with Harold as well, so he felt a very strange sensation.

“Do you want to sit first?”

This time, Eren sat down without brushing the seat off. Harold quietly sat down beside him.

“So, what’s your answer?”

Eren stared at Harold’s face, then turned his head to look at the rear garden. The dizzying floral scent still tickled his nose.

“Well, it’s just….”