Chapter 48: Stalking is bad (2)

I held Jihyun’s hand and we walked quietly along the road.

Even though there were no words exchanged, I felt comfortable.

Normally, I would have been extremely awkward in this situation.

I wonder why.

Is it because I’m with Jihyun?

I’m not sure.

At some point, Jihyun stared at me intently, so I gave her a small smile.

“Ugh….”

“Huh. What’s wrong?”

I looked at her with wide eyes. It seems like Jihyun’s strange behavior has started.

But before I could do anything, Jihyun stepped in and stopped me.

“No, no. It’s okay, you don’t have to.”

“Are you really okay…?”

“Ugh… I don’t think I’ll be okay if you keep looking at me like that.”

What kind of look is she talking about?

I tilted my head. No matter how much I think about it, I haven’t done anything that could trigger her strange behavior.

Jihyun doesn’t look like it, but she seems to be a bit eccentric.

“It’s not what you think, so stop.”

“Okay.”

It wasn’t surprising anymore, this mind-reading ability.

How do Yejin and Jihyun read my thoughts so well?

It must be something worthy of being listed in the seven wonders of the world. By the way, I’m the one who decides the listing criteria.

Ah. Come to think of it.

“Jihyun.”

“What.”

There was something I’ve been curious about for a while. I couldn’t ask because of the situation or the people around us.

But now, in the dead of night, just the two of us, wouldn’t it be okay to ask?

Who knows when a day like this will come again.

With that thought in mind, I asked bluntly.

“Do you, by any chance, have a girlfriend?”

…

“Wh-what!?”

Oh my god.

Why are you shouting like that?

The impact of the shouting from right above me was strong. Surprised by the sound, I covered my ears with my other free hand.

For some reason, I feel like I’m hearing a ringing sound. Is something wrong?

Feeling wronged, I protested to Jihyun.

“Why, why are you shouting…?”

“No, I… I never imagined you’d ask that, I’m sorry.”

Jihyun clumsily made excuses and eventually lowered her head. Her shadowed face looked pitiful.

It wasn’t something she needed to apologize for.

Of course, my ears hurt a little. But it’s okay now.

Judging by her reaction, it seems like the question I asked touched a sensitive spot. I shook my head.

“It’s okay. I think I asked a question I shouldn’t have in the first place….”

“It wasn’t that you shouldn’t have. I was just… surprised.”

“…?”

I thought I asked the question according to the common sense of this world.

It’s common sense for a woman to date a woman, right?

Or maybe Jihyun is from the same original world as me. It would be surprising to ask a heterosexual person if they have a girlfriend.

I’m starting to have reasonable doubts.

However, my doubts were immediately dispelled by Jihyun’s words.

…

“I… I’ve never dated a woman before.”

“Then, a man?”

“O….”

Was that really something to make such a disgusted face about…?

“Yeah.”

Jihyun was firm. I get it, so please don’t make such a serious face. It’s scary.

I should never mention men in front of them again.

Anyway, it’s surprising that she’s never been in a relationship.

Even just looking at her appearance, she looks scary, but she seems like she’d be popular.

“Actually, Jihyun…”

…?

I feel like I’m being watched from somewhere.

Feeling chills, I quickly turned my head to find the source.

I definitely felt like I was being watched from around the corner, but it was dark and in a blind spot, so I couldn’t see anything.

“What’s wrong? Hey, Kim Jia.”

Is it paranoia? But it was too blatant for that.

I don’t know what it was, but the gaze that was staring at me.

“Kim Jia!!”

“…Huh?”

I was barely able to regain my senses thanks to Jihyun shouting my name.

My body trembling, I grabbed Jihyun’s hand tightly and explained what had just happened.

“What the hell.”

“I don’t know…….”

“Let’s find out who it is right now.”

Jihyun looked like she was about to rush to the place where I felt the gaze.

Is she crazy? I quickly grabbed Jihyun’s arm.

“Don’t go….”

“But, what if they do something to you after I leave you?”

“It’ll be okay, it’ll get brighter if we go a little further. And I need to be with you right now to calm down.”

Jihyun hesitated at my words. I was grateful that Jihyun calmly listened to me.

I’m still trembling.

Was I like this when I was a man? I tried to recall.

The gaze that looked at me with disdain. The gaze of contempt that made me lower myself.

Ah, yes. I think it was definitely like that.

But it was a different type of gaze than back then. Why am I so shaken?

I burrowed into Jihyun’s arms without hesitation. I thought that if I hugged her tightly, the trembling might subside.

Thump-thump-

I could hear her heartbeat as our bodies touched. Her body temperature was high and warm.

Above all, the regular sound gave me comfort. I loosened the strength I was putting into my arms.

“…”

“Are you okay now?”

“Yeah. Thank you.”

“Don’t mention it.”

I was truly grateful. I rubbed my head against her as a sign of thanks.

“Hey, hey… wait a minute!”

“Mmm….”

“Let’s talk when we get home. Please…!”

I pulled away from Jihyun at those words. I was making a stupid face, and it was quite funny.

Jihyun is weak to skinship.

I learned something new today.

Being outside all day made my whole body feel sticky. After arriving home, I immediately took a shower.

As expected, I was bombarded with questions from my sister as soon as I got home. She asked if anything had happened, if I had been hurt. She shook my body as she asked.

Of course, I escaped with the excuse of needing to shower.

I was so glad that my sister went to bed after I finished showering.

Even when I said I was going to shower, she used to say that I had changed, that I used to ask her to wash me. I didn’t know how shameful it was.

Back then, it was a time when I didn’t know how to wash myself.

It’s different now.

And it’s embarrassing to show my body to someone who sees me as… a sexual object.

I shook my head to shake off the memories that were creeping back and sat down.

Oh right. I just need to text Jihyun.

She told me to contact her when I got home before we parted ways. She said she was worried about me…

Jihyun is such a kind friend.

Kim Jia: I arrived home safely.

Kim Jia: (A hamster giving a thumbs up emoticon)

This should be enough, right?

Just sending a text message felt a bit empty. I sent a lucky hamster emoticon and turned off my phone with satisfaction.

Come to think of it, I wonder if everyone is managing the gallery well… I couldn’t go in at all today because I was studying.

Actually, it wouldn’t be an exaggeration to say that I didn’t study at all, but that was a minor issue.

With such somewhat shameless thoughts, I turned on the computer.

I went to the community and entered the Yuri Gallery, and it was peaceful, probably because the assistant moderators were doing their jobs very well.

But what kind of topic are they discussing now?

As someone who just entered, it took me a while to figure it out.

I tried to understand it step by step, and I was able to figure out what kind of topic it was.

It’s a first love topic.

It was surprising that these people also had first loves. They’re always in the gallery now.

With that thought, I clicked on the top post.

Click-

<I’m drinking and I really miss you>

The love I fell for the first time I saw you.

I wonder if you’re doing well.

I loved you, f*cking…

-oo:Auntie, you smell like alcohol.

-oo:Fcking btch, I’m not an auntie.

The typos disappear when she mentions ‘auntie’ ㄷㄷ -oo:Suspiciously.

-oo:What’s your first love doing now?

–oo:I don’t know, f*ck. How would I know, I’m not stalking them on Instagram.

-oo:Go to sleep.

I could smell the alcohol from the post. I tried to move on to the next post.

My teens, when everything was new and fresh.

Those were the days when I was thrilled just talking to you.

Now we’re living different lives, going our separate ways.

But I miss those days.

My first love. I’ll be cheering for you from afar.

-oo:(Crying emoticon) (Crying emoticon)

-oo:It’s not even dawn yet, why are you so sentimental?

–oo:Please stop the first love topic, posts like this will keep coming up until it stops.

<I wish I could run into you on the street, even just once>

It’s been almost 5 years since I last saw the unnie who was my first love.

I’m so curious about what you’re doing and where you are.

I’m even worried if you’re even alive.

Even just once, just once would be fine, can’t we meet?

-oo: Can’t you contact them?

–oo:I deleted everything back then because I wanted to forget…

–oo:Or maybe ask a mutual acquaintance.

We had a pretty big age gap, so we didn’t have any mutual acquaintances ㅠㅠ -oo:

-oo:Who started this first love topic?

–SaveThePolarBears: Assistant mod.

Hmm… first love. It felt strange.

I think I had one too. Of course, it was when my self-esteem was at rock bottom, so I couldn’t even talk to them.

Can this even be called a first love?

I’m not sure.

By the way, I saw something in the last comment that I couldn’t ignore.

An assistant moderator started this topic?

I immediately moved the mouse around to find the source.

Ah. I think this is it.

<Have you ever had a crush?>

Author: NotATroll

I have a woman I love for the first time, and we’re complete strangers.

My heart is pounding and I think about her every day, so I can’t live my daily life. Have you ever felt this way?

I still can’t forget that face.

What should I do?