Chapter 49: Sickly, delicate, pure beauty (…maybe?)

[Author: Rehabilitation Viewer] [Title: Come Back, Come Back, Come Back, Come Back, Come Back]

“I’ll behave, I’ll behave, I’ll behave, I’ll behave, I’ll behave, I’ll behave, I’ll behave, I’ll behave.

“I won’t send messages like, ‘If your hand is 13cm, does that mean your heartbeat is 130cm tall!? Gasp…! Gasp…! Wakya pyaha huff nngjuk ᄏᄏ hufffffff!’”

“I won’t type, ‘You were the one who seduced me first! You damn…’ or ‘The only thing better than a child is an even younger child.’”

“I didn’t mean to mock you for being small or say crude things to make you quit streaming, right?

“Just come back, I swear I’ll behave ᅲᅲᅲᅲᅲᅲᅲᅲᅲᅲᅲ.”

“You’re insane.”

“Since you turned yourself in, your 100-year ban is now reduced to 50 years.”

“A 50% discount—how generous.”

“But let’s be honest, is there anyone here who hasn’t sent messages like that? Put your hand on your heart and confess.”

“Actually… me too…”

“Is this a police confession meetup?”

“This thread reeks of that one cursed site—”

“Damn, it’s the nngjuk cult again.”

It had been three days since the Legendary Streamer board opened on WriteIt.

That meant five days had passed since her last broadcast.

Still, there was no stream.

No announcements.

She had promised to return stronger in the next broadcast.

But now, with no news, wild theories started spreading.

[Author: Feeling Stronger] [Title: Is Legendary Streamer Actually Sick?]

“She collapsed and got taken away in an ambulance during her first 24-hour challenge.

“She doesn’t seem like a kid, but her hands are tiny—13cm? That’s strange.”

“Could she have had a serious illness that stunted her growth?”

“She never even explained why she got taken to the ER that day.”

“How often do normal people call 119?”

“Teamfight Arena has been out for three years, yet she, a hardcore gamer, only started playing now?”

“Was she in the hospital for those three years?”

“She seems reluctant about her stream growing bigger. She never talks about her personal life. She barely reacts to donations and even tells people to stop sending them.”

“Maybe… she’s distancing herself on purpose? So when she disappears, people won’t be sad?”

“Sounds like a novel.”

“But why does it make so much sense?”

“Legendary Streamer, please don’t be sick ᅲᅲᅲ.”

“Do Victory and Wild know anything?”

“Tragic, delicate, sickly beauty—Legendary Streamer ᄃ.”

It was such a ridiculous theory.

Yet, there was no other explanation.

So, some people actually started believing it.

“What if she’s really sick?”

Not in the usual mocking “Are you brain-damaged?” way.

But in a real, serious way.

And then, she finally returned—fueling the rumors even more.

“Cough, cough! Cough, cough! It’s been a while, everyone.”

“…She’s actually sick, isn’t she?”

“People are asking if I’m unwell, but—cough!—that’s not true—cough!”

The more she denied it while coughing, the more convincing it sounded.

I needed time to think.

I was at a crossroads.

One path led to half-stepping into society.

The other led to becoming a ghost on the internet.

If I joined an MCN and started streaming professionally, I’d inevitably get involved with more people.

Even if I didn’t physically go outside much, my name, face, and actions would become more known.

On the other hand, I could forgo most—no, a lot—of profit and just stay in my room as a hobby streamer.

My room was safe.

Comfortable.

There was nothing to threaten me there.

“The world outside is dangerous.”

I had seen real disaster before.

Back when I went to college in the U.S.

Because of me, a shooting happened.

People like to think of first-world countries as better than Korea, but America is still just another place with people.

And some of those people? Absolute lunatics.

A guy who thought eating vegetables made him gay, so he’d order burgers with the tomato and lettuce removed.

A guy who thought using an umbrella when it rained made you gay—so he’d just punch anyone using one.

Listening to female singers? Gay.

Growing out your bangs? Gay.

Driving a car that looked gay? Gay.

And if a man watched anime?

Super gay.

That’s how it started.

Everyone knows I like anime.

My favorite? Magical Girls Chronicle.

And Magical Fight is a fan game of Magical Girls Chronicle.

Since I had already transitioned, no one cared that I liked it.

But the guy who became my friend because of anime?

He got bullied hard.

Turns out, some guys who got rejected by me decided to gang up and torment him.

What kind of hyper-masculine logic is that? If you’re mad, go chop off your own balls, idiots.

Anyway, I only found out about the bullying because—

My friend shot them all.

Yep.

American bullying escalates fast.

Thankfully, no one died.

But he left them permanently injured—wrecked their arms and legs.

Then he went to prison.

And when he was getting arrested?

He looked at me and smiled.

That creepy, I think I did something cool kind of smile.

For a second, I thought he might shoot me too.

And honestly?

I wouldn’t have blamed him.

It wasn’t my fault, but if he had blamed me, I wouldn’t have argued.

After that, I dropped out.

Locked myself away.

Because I was terrified of the outside world.

“The world outside is dangerous.”

That’s why I came back to Korea.

Sure, people can still kill you with a spoon if they want.

But at least here, they don’t have guns.

“Still, I don’t want my family to keep worrying.”

Dad, Seol-yoon, and… even Mom.

They’d probably prefer if I wasn’t a total shut-in.

“But I’m still scared.”

What if too many people fall for me again?

What if everything goes to hell again?

That fear won’t go away.

This was what I had been agonizing over for days.

My mind was such a mess that I spent an entire day running on a treadmill at the gym.

It was the middle of winter, so running outside wasn’t an option.

At least the gym was indoors.

After running to the point of reaching a runner’s high, my mind did clear up a bit.

But I ran way too much.

Victory – <Are you seriously sick?>

“Cough, cough.”

So when Victory sent me that message, I actually was sick with a cold.

Cough.

Victory – <No announcement, nothing. Are you in the hospital again?>

Cough cough, cough cough cough, cough cough.

Legender – <I said I’d come back with some things prepared for the next stream.>

Legender – <That means I won’t stream until I have everything ready.>

Victory – <How does that even make sense?>

Victory –

Legender – <?>

Legender – <Is that weird?>

Victory –

Victory – <But seriously, you’re not actually sick, right?>

Legender – <oᄋ ᄀᄎ>

Victory –

Victory – <People are freaking out, thinking you’re sick.>

Hmm. Is that so?

Are there really that many people waiting for me?

When I checked the board, it was pure chaos.

“Legendary Streamer is terminally ill?”

I’m not dying.

Don’t turn this into some weird obsession story.

It’s kind of scary.

“Why are they so obsessed with me?”

Okay, I’ll admit I’m kind of unique.

A girl who’s insanely good at games.

There aren’t many like me.

But isn’t that all?

Out of the countless things in the world to enjoy, I’m just a slightly more interesting channel.

If I disappeared, would anything really change that much?

Why are they so fixated on me?

“Is it because I’m just too pretty?”

Rejected.

No one actually knows I’m an SSS-rank beauty in real life.

My voice…

Well, I did train my voice to sound really nice.

But losing a radio channel doesn’t change anyone’s life, does it?

I don’t really understand why they like me so much.

If I disappear, they can just watch another channel.

…But, it’s not a bad feeling.

Instead of wagging their tails at another streamer’s doorstep, they’re still waiting in front of mine.

That’s… kind of cute.

Maybe I should check in.

Cough.

I started my stream.

“Cough, cough! Cough! Cough! It’s been a while, everyone.”

<MOM DON’T LEAVE ME MOM DON’T LEAVE ME MOM DON’T LEAVE ME MOM DON’T LEAVE ME MOM DON’T LEAVE ME MOM DON’T LEAVE ME MOM DON’T LEAVE ME>

<YOU’LL COME BACK, RIGHT? YOU’LL COME BACK, RIGHT? YOU’LL COME BACK, RIGHT? YOU’LL COME BACK, RIGHT?>

What’s wrong with these guys?

They’re making me feel attached.

Weren’t we just in a business relationship?

I provide entertainment, you give me attention. That kind of relationship.

“I heard people are wondering if I’m sick, but—cough!—that’s not true—cough!”

<ᅲᅲᅲᅲᅲᅲᅲᅲᅲᅲᅲᅲᅲᅲᅲᅲ>

<Don’t die, Legendary Streamer.>

<You can’t be sick!>

“There’s actually a lot I need to prepare to stream properly. Cough!”

<You could’ve at least posted an announcement, dumbass.>

<You didn’t even have five minutes to check the board? That’s ridiculous.>

<Don’t forget us. Don’t forget us. Don’t forget us.>

“So, about that—does anyone want to be a chat moderator? I’ll pay minimum wage. Cough!”

<Why are you coughing so much? You said you weren’t sick.>

<That’s some unconvincing denial.>

<Are you actually sick? ;;;;>

<A tragic, sickly, delicate, pure beauty—Legendary Streamer ᅲ>

“Coughing? I ran too hard on the treadmill. Cough! I caught a cold. Cough!”

<A woman who exercises. ᅩᅮᅣ>

<Ooooh~ that fragrant sweat smell, hoooh hooooh>

<STOP THESE DISGUSTING MESSAGES! We’re about to lose another week of streams!>

<You guys want the stream to end? CONTROL YOURSELVES!>

<Late-night… Late-night stream…?>

<Hmm. Is she really a newbie? I’m starting to doubt it.>

What are they even talking about?

Where else would you find a streamer as genuine as me?

I don’t even get what’s so good about this.

Why are they getting so invested?

I haven’t done anything.

(Seriously, I don’t get it.)