Chapter 5: Sione Sianella (5)

The dinner time spent sitting at the long table with my family is the most difficult time for me.

I think I have no right to be here, living in seclusion without achieving anything for the proud Count family.

This gathering of family feels to me nothing more than a thorny seat.

Therefore, it is painful for me to sit here.

Once again, I quietly finished my meal as if I were being chased and got up from my seat first.

“…I will go in first.”

Having ended my meal like this, as if I were running away, it has been years, so now there’s no special reaction from my family.

At this point, their indifference is more comfortable for me, and I welcome their silence.

I fidgeted in my seat to distance myself as much as possible from this awkward gathering.

As I approached the exit of the dining hall, I heard the louder voices of men than usual.

The familiar voices that I have grown tired of hearing from them chatting here every day.

• The attendants of Siabel and Sion.

Once again, they must be insulting me or bragging about my sister and younger brother as if it were their own story.

“What do you think? No matter how today is the first day of serving, she is Lady Sione… Did Lady Sione perhaps make you uncomfortable in any way?”

It seems today’s topic is indeed insults about me.

It’s impressive how I am openly criticized even by the attendants.

With such a question, the man who has become my personal servant this time will surely start talking behind my back like them…

At this point, avoiding people and easily hurling sharp words has become a habit for me, so it’s only natural that he would also criticize me.

I deserve to be insulted.

However, contrary to my thoughts, his voice did not spew any insults about me.

“At least please understand that the Lady Sione I have seen with my own eyes is not the aristocrat you all complain about.”

He seemed to dislike me quite a bit while cleaning my room.

Why is he siding with me?

Is there some other reason?

Even I think that my usual demeanor is that of a reckless person, not the polite noble I once admired.

It’s only natural for me to be insulted.

Although his reaction was different from what I expected, it didn’t feel bad at all.

“Shall we go back to the room?”

So, I glanced at him for a moment.

People’s eyes do not lie.

I wanted to catch even a glimpse of the reason he sided with me.

But that was all.

“…Yeah, let’s go back to the room.”

I didn’t want to stand awkwardly here for long.

I stopped trying to see through his inner thoughts and left.

It’s obvious that as time goes by, he won’t side with me anymore.

So, I thought I wouldn’t have to care too much.

Days passed like that.

Winter passed, and spring came.

By this time, I thought that the seeds that had been dormant in winter would bloom and fully blossom.

The weather was fine, and I went for a walk for the first time in a long while.

Naturally, that servant followed me from behind.

Excited at the thought of seeing my favorite flowers after a long time, I muttered to myself.

“The sunshine is warm, and the breeze is cool, so the weather is nice.”

“It’s perfect weather for a light stroll.”

“Indeed.”

Thus began a conversation with him, starting from my muttering.

“Where are you going?”

“I’m planning to go to the garden. At this time, the daffodils and irises are in bloom and quite beautiful.”

“I’m looking forward to it.”

“Anticipating is also a form of amusement. Besides that, you’ll be able to see tulips and daisies as well.”

I didn’t feel bad about the ordinary conversation after a long time, so I answered willingly.

As we continued chatting, he asked a question.

“Do you like flowers, Lady Sione?”

The reason I like flowers.

I originally had no intention of sharing, but…

On a simple whim, I decided to reveal it.

“Flowers bloom. They break free from the suffocating, dark seeds, take root, sprout, and through constant effort, ultimately blossom. Isn’t that quite admirable?”

Unlike me, who is always trapped in dark seeds, flowers bloom someday.

I liked flowers.

I could say that I spent a decent time enjoying the garden with such trivial conversations, but soon after meeting Sion, my emotions wilted.

My younger brother hated my incompetence and lethargy and loved to criticize me using that as a pretext.

From my younger brother’s mouth, the stories of the talented eldest and youngest daughters of the Sianella family, unlike me, and my slander continuously came out.

…I’m tired. I hate everything now. I didn’t choose to be born this way.

“If only I had proper talent.”

As I whispered that, the servant, who usually seemed to be attentive to my feelings, brazenly spoke up.

“Then shouldn’t you seek a talent other than swordsmanship?”

I was taken aback.

How dare someone who just appeared a week ago speak so boldly?

“How outrageous. You’re so ignorant that you don’t even know what our Sianella family is like, despite being born lowly.”

“I’ve heard that even Sion Sianella has achieved excellent results by choosing the path of a priest rather than swordsmanship. Lady Sione, you don’t have to insist on swordsmanship just because of your bloodline.”

Yes, I know I don’t have to insist on swordsmanship.

That’s why I fought back so fiercely in the past.

“No one is born without talent. Lady Sione, you simply have not yet discovered the talent given to you.”

“…….

“Have you ever trained in anything other than swordsmanship, Lady Sione?”

…Of course. I wanted to be recognized as a proper member somehow. But—

I wanted to unravel the pent-up frustrations.

“After giving up on the sword, I picked up a spear. Yet, just like with the sword, the day never came when the spear moved smoothly in my hands.”

“After ultimately setting down the spear, I tried to learn magic as well. But I realized I didn’t match with magic at all.”

“Yet, I thought it was too early to give up. Having realized I didn’t fit dynamic things, I entered the library to read books to build static knowledge.”

“I didn’t expect any support. I just wanted them to understand and wait until I found my own path. But while I was in the library reading, everyone was busy comparing and belittling me.”

And in response to my words, he said,

“I’m glad to hear that.”

I was taken aback.

To say “I’m glad” in this situation was absurd.

“…You must be mistaken, right?”

I was angry.

Very angry.

“I’m glad there’s still something I can teach you.”

But after hearing this, I was about to burst out laughing instead of getting angry.

“Have you ever pulled back a bowstring?”

I didn’t understand his words.

“What on earth do you mean by saying that? If you’re just trying to shake me, isn’t it enough now?”

“I think it would be good for you to set aside some time starting tomorrow and try a little. What do you think?”

“Are you saying I should step outside this room and shoot a bow? Ha, I can almost hear the knights’ laughter echoing in here.”

It was almost amusing.

“What do you mean by saying you’re going to teach me? If I go out with you, it’s obvious I’ll become a laughingstock again. I may have been born a slave, but I’m a man with mana. Is there any reason for me to endure such ridicule after being born with the title of a noble’s lowly servant?”

“I have learned a bit of swordsmanship and archery before because I was set to be sold.”

“…”

I had learned just enough to fit in, but… at least I should be able to teach you how to hold the bow properly and shoot.

I really couldn’t understand why he was so attached to me.

“If you’re worried about others laughing, don’t worry. If it’s hard to see the target in the dark, it would be better to go out just as dawn starts and come back before others arrive. I’ll make sure to wake you up if I can.”

“Right, ha ha.”

That was all I could manage to say.

What could someone like me offer to make him go through so much trouble?

To say he would teach me archery—could he really take that responsibility?

“Of course.”

“I’m curious where that confidence comes from. It’s been a while since I’ve heard something so amusing. Well then, enough of this nonsense. Let’s head out, but this joke ends here.”

I no longer wanted to hear his foolishness. Every time I listened to him, my head grew more complicated.

“If I risk everything I have, will you believe me?”

But he didn’t stop and continued to rattle me.

So I asked directly, “What is your reason for clinging to me so much?”

His answer was beyond my imagination.

“No servant enjoys their master being disregarded. If such a person exists, they’ve already turned their heart toward someone else.”

“I won’t laugh at you.”

…Am I feeling bad about being disregarded? Why…

I sank onto my bed, lost in thought.

It was hard to reach a conclusion easily, but my heart tilted a little more toward one side.

“…This will be the first and last time I grant your request, so understand that.”

I decided to let his words persuade me just this once.