Unsure how to enliven the atmosphere, I gradually found myself engrossed in the game.
As someone with utterly terrible aim in FPS games, my playstyle was immediately recognizable.
Being so poor at the game, I adopted an extremely cautious approach, never firing a shot unless absolutely necessary.
With exceptional situational awareness and keen eyesight, I managed to evade confrontation after confrontation, somehow sneaking into the top 20 without firing a single bullet.
Then, spotting a lone figure in the distance, I dropped to the ground and began to crawl forward, inch by painstaking inch.
The player was ‘looting a body bag,’ likely searching for valuable items or perhaps contemplating a decision, remaining stationary—an ideal opportunity for a surprise attack.
Closer, I crept. Closer still.
When I was less than twenty meters away, I suddenly sprang up, unleashing a furious barrage of bullets, “tat-tat-tat-tat-tat-tat,” emptying an entire magazine in a whoosh.
Immediately, my screen dimmed, transitioning to the settlement page. Σ(ŎдŎ|||)ﾉﾉ
****
Let’s rewind to that precise moment:
Prone over the loot bag, the other player was still deliberating between an AK and an M16 when a sudden burst of gunfire erupted behind them. ‘Damn it,’ they thought, ‘I was careless. This is it, I’m dead. Who would’ve thought someone would crawl from *there*?’
By the time they frantically exited their inventory screen, I had already emptied my entire magazine. They had taken only three hits, none to the head, suffering virtually no effective damage.
A few swift, fluid shots were all it took to finish me off…
∑(❍ฺд❍ฺlll)
How utterly mortifying. My reputation was in tatters.
While my noobish performance in FPS games was hardly a secret, one always harbored the faint hope that *this* time would be different.
I let out a sheepish, hesitant chuckle. “Heh-heh, just an accident, an accident.”
At that moment, a bullet comment drifted across the screen. Peeking at the small window beside it, I saw it was from Cute Little Fanboy.
– Moe God is still Moe God, isn’t she? Look at that shameless awareness to sneak into the top 20, that graceful retreat, and finally, that ‘gun god’ level aim. Definitely a noob Dream!
– As expected, still that king-tier awareness, but bronze—no, plastic-tier aim, noob Dream!
– Tsk, tsk. Indeed. If that entire magazine had actually hit, *then* I’d suspect you were a stand-in.
– You should really stop torturing yourself. FPS? That’s far too difficult for someone with such clumsy hands.
A flurry of bullet comments streamed in. Although most were laced with mockery, this was precisely the usual atmosphere of my stream.
I had originally intended to stun everyone with a god-tier play, to finally make them believe in me.
Instead, I had inadvertently proven my identity through my signature ‘noob Dream’ death.
It was clear that these bullet comments came from my old viewers, many of whom I’d played with before. They had undoubtedly sensed my embarrassment and were now stepping in to lighten the mood.
In that moment, I felt truly touched. Though I hadn’t said it before, it was incredibly awkward for a streamer if no one spoke in the chat, no matter how many viewers there were.
Perhaps it was due to having transformed into a goddess, but I felt a sting in my nose. I quickly suppressed the emotion, however, and adopted my signature cheeky tone.
“That guy was as skinny as a bean sprout! Is it my fault I couldn’t hit him? Besides, my mouse glitched just now, making my crosshair fly all over the place. To even hit him under those conditions? That’s already incredibly strong, isn’t it?”
The bullet comments immediately erupted into another wave of mockery.
I let out a cold huff. “It seems this type of game isn’t for me. I’ll go play League of Legends instead.”
To be precise, I wasn’t clumsy, but the act of precisely clicking while moving the mouse was indeed too difficult for me.
When it came to hand speed, which game streamer would dare claim to be faster than me? Consequently, with my days spent gaming, I possessed consciousness far exceeding the average person, coupled with unparalleled hand speed.
In games like Summoner’s Rift and JX3, I was virtually unstoppable.
Gradually, the mockery transformed into a chorus of “666”s.
I merely smiled at this. After all, it was always like this; my stream’s atmosphere was such that even the slightest mistake would trigger my unreliable viewers to immediately start flaming me.
Accustomed to such antics, I continued to play the game, only to discover that my stream had crashed.
Huh? ⊙∀⊙! It had indeed crashed.
Too many viewers. The stream had crashed…
Because it was so important, I rephrased and stated it three times.
Wait, it was only 8 PM, and after just one hour, the stream was over?
So, this wasn’t my fault, was it…?
Meanwhile, the livestreaming platform was in utter chaos. What a golden opportunity to earn money, only for it to… crash?
Now, I was free, idly slumped over my computer desk.
Yet, at the same time, the internet was anything but calm.
The one-hour video instantly went viral worldwide—yes, worldwide. Cute Little Fanboy thoughtfully translated it into English, Japanese, Russian, and Korean versions.
Overnight, the “Moe God Holy Church” fan forum’s followers swelled to 50 million. Fan chapters also sprang up across Japan, Europe, America, Korea, South Asia, Australia, and other regions—all, naturally, orchestrated by none other than Cute Little Fanboy.
If I had known this then, I would surely have wondered, ‘Just who *is* this Cute Little Fanboy?’