I Eat Lemons

After being startled by Miss Nilu’s “last-minute” reminder, forcing me to let go of the hand that was about to “wall-pin” me and instead head out for dinner, Kefir didn’t have much of a mood left either.

After dinner, she and Nilu snuggled up together to rest, while I, the “stinky man,” had to go sleep somewhere else.

What surprised me, though, was that unlike clinging to Kefir’s thigh the whole night, I stayed up staring at the script — and yet, no scenario of those Rossiya Empire brutes showing up to cause trouble appeared.

In the morning they looked all set on “killing us,” but at night they’d learned their lesson?

With the arrival of the next day inside the Goddess Ruins, I didn’t get a chance to think about it more.

After confirming that the three Rossiya thugs hadn’t followed us, we continued exploring along the true path that I discovered yesterday thanks to Kefir’s “protagonist aura.”

Considering yesterday’s situation, I decided I should explain a little to Kefir that she’s completely different from all the other extras, and she doesn’t need to copy anyone else.

“Kefir, yesterday through prophecy I already understood — the Goddess Ruins may look like something anyone can explore, but in reality, some paths are specially prepared for you.”

“……”

Kefir didn’t seem to listen. She just kept her head down, and even let me take over as the pathfinder instead of her.

Me, the big villain, walking the main character’s path step by step — am I not asking for death!?

Still, I couldn’t very well risk even more by scolding her. As for why she insisted on staying so close to me today, I could only pretend not to notice.

“For example, what looks like a dead end to others might be a secret passage for you. Some strange-looking objects might do nothing when others touch them, but if you touch them, they’ll react.”

In dungeon terms, this is called an “interactive element.” If Kefir understands this, in the future she’ll sweep through the world invincible! And I’ll get to enjoy hugging her without worry!

But Kefir stayed silent, while Nilu timidly stopped walking.

“Mr. Euclid…”

“What is it, Nilu?”

I instinctively turned my head to ask, and the usually silent Kefir suddenly raised her head and looked at me, hesitating to speak.

“Um… just now, when I followed your advice and touched around, I think I pressed a stone that was sticking out…”

“……”

Crap! I totally forgot about Nilu!

【Click】

My words were meant for Kefir, but from another perspective, Nilu is also a “protagonist”!

And unlike Kefir, Nilu is the type of protagonist who has the entire world’s script boosting her, insta-killing bosses with 999 damage!

【Nilu has unlocked a hidden path and obtained a soul-bound powerful artifact!】

【Rumble】

Just as the script declared, the place Nilu touched revealed a secret passage leading underground, with bats flapping out as if to loudly announce that a treasure lay inside!

“Ah, my lady, it looks like there’s a path…”

“Heh heh… ah ah ah! W-wait!”

I quickly stopped Kefir and Nilu before they got any strange ideas.

If Nilu goes down there and picks up some artifact, won’t she be able to kill me with no effort later?

Tch, I got careless because I thought this ruin dungeon was deserted, so I let Nilu come along. But it seems even without convenient old mentors appearing, she just has to walk around to level up endlessly!

“I just foresaw it — this path is a trap!”

No choice, I had to lie.

“So what? You two can stay up here, I’ll go check it out.”

And, to correct Kefir’s prideful way of thinking, I had to pile on the lies, while also clutching her arm tightly.

“Absolutely not! I foresaw it — Kefir, if you go, you’ll get hurt! Trust me this time, don’t let curiosity win.”

Even through her clothes, I could feel Kefir’s body tense up.

After a moment of stiffness, she finally sighed, shook off my hand, and stammered,

“I… I understand. Then let’s not go, we’ll keep moving forward.”

“Whew… thank goodness. Anyway, Kefir, I’ll warn you right away if anything dangerous comes up.”

“Mm… mm…”

No doubt, the parts of this dungeon meant for Kefir, the true protagonist, should follow the pattern: normal exploration, fighting a few monsters, stumbling into a boss room that looks different, then beating the boss, taking the treasure, and leveling up.

As for “finding artifacts just by walking around” — that’s clearly Nilu’s gimmick.

But constantly making excuses to stop Kefir from checking things out whenever Nilu finds something… sooner or later, she’ll suspect I’m hiding something.

Maybe in the future, when exploring, it would be better to leave Nilu, this artifact-magnet maid, back at camp?

“Kefir, don’t look at that chest! There’s a monster hiding in it — the legendary mimic!”

“I… I kn-know! You damn shaman, stop getting so close, you reek!”

I’m just trying not to die here…

Once again forced to lie to keep Kefir away from a “hidden chest” Nilu found, I sighed deeply, only to notice Nilu had fallen behind us.

I rushed over.

“Nilu? What’s wrong?”

“My lady looks so happy… and… her relationship with you is really growing stronger… I…”

Nilu seemed to mutter something gloomily, but by the time I reached her, all I saw was her sunny smile.

“It’s nothing. I just tripped. Mr. Euclid, let’s hurry and catch up with my lady’s pace!”