A Reckless Alliance

“—Who tries to gauge someone’s character by picking a fight?”

“—That’s truly my bad. I apologize to PatchNote-nim too. I didn’t mean it in a bad way.”

“—…It’s fine. It can happen.”

The two, looking slightly unsettled yet somehow understanding each other, exchanged subtle glances and shook hands.
It was almost like a scene from a movie or drama where men form a friendship after a brutal fight.

‘So why did they even start a war of nerves in the first place?’
‘They’re coming to conclusions among themselves and not telling me?’
‘You bastard thugs.’

“—Tsk, Moon Young-yoon, if you ramp up the tempo any more, you’re dead.”

“—Ah, why! I just started feeling good! Hey, hey, was it Do-yoon? You have to take my glass too!”

“—Yes, hyung.”

After a round of reconciliation followed by another exchange of glances, the two bastards instantly started calling each other ‘hyung’ and chugging drinks, completely excluding me.

They got along too well, even.

I was at the point of doubting if these were really the same bastards who had been having a staring contest just moments ago.

“—Cheers! You drink well! Have you tried soju-cider-beer? I’m practically a master of it! Auntie! Please give me some cider!”

“—Does cider go into soju-cider-beer?”

“—Alcohol alone is bitter, isn’t it? If you mix it at a ratio of 1 soju, 1 cider, and 2 beer, how delicious it is~?”

“—Oh… I’ve never had anything like this before.”

‘My rough thoughts, my anxious eyes, and me watching lightweights chugging alcohol.’
‘That’s probably like dealing with a war.’

“—Kuh-euh! Wow, it’s definitely more delicious with cider!”

“—Right? It goes down smoothly, doesn’t it? Here, have another glass! More, more!”

“—Yes, thank you!”

Both of them looked bright, as if they really liked this drinking session.

So bright that it felt like the sun was shining right in front of my eyes.

Their drinking speed seemed faster than their ordering speed for new drinks.

Especially after Moon Young-yoon poured in beer to make the soju-cider mix, four bottles disappeared in no time.

‘No, Moon Young-yoon is usually like this, so that’s one thing, but why is Han Do-yoon like that?’
‘Didn’t that guy say he couldn’t drink, with his own mouth?’

More importantly, at the last meetup, he passed out after just a few drafts.

Despite it being clear that they had already exceeded their tolerance, the two didn’t stop.
Like a fire truck that doesn’t stop at a red light.

“—S-so that’s why I! This SoonToDie bastard, I should have punched himmm!”

“What about me?”

“—Jungwoo hyung… where would you… even… hit… him…”

“—That’s why! That’s why I! Didn’t hit him, I tell youuu! If I hit him, Park Jungwoo… found dead the next day!”

“—Stop it.”

‘Damages or not, I really want to punch you.’

I clenched my fists, trembling with anger, then turned my head at the sound of a bell from behind, just in case.
I wondered what if it wasn’t him, but thankfully, the one who opened the door and entered was YearRoundNoRest, Jung Taewon.

He, who had initially approached our table leisurely with relaxed steps… paused upon seeing Moon Young-yoon and Han Do-yoon, who were clearly plastered and making a scene.

Jung Taewon, who had stopped with his hand raised to greet us, drew a faint smile, unlike his usual self.
The moment I saw that smile, I was certain.

‘Ah, that bastard. He’s planning to dump these lightweights on me and run away.’
‘I won’t let that happen.’

“—Where are you… running to…”

“—Gasp…! Oh, when did you arrive? Haha. Where would I go? I just got here!”

“—Right. You just got here, but you were doing a backstep? Do you want to end up like them?”

“—Eeeeh! When did I ever do a backstep, huh? You’re making things up! Haha! Hahahahaha!”

Jung Taewon, who burst into an exaggerated laugh and sat down, became increasingly wild, contrary to my expectation that he would be awkward in such a situation.

Of course, it was fine at first.

He even tried his best to hold back on drinking, and even when he was given a lot, he only took small sips.

The problem was that Moon Young-yoon was absolutely not the type to let that slide.

“—Bastard…”

“—Grrr, woof woof! Grrrr!”

“—Puhahahaha! Look at him! Making dog noises!”

“—Grrrrrrrrrrrrrr!”

Thanks to Moon Young-yoon’s barbarism of forcing soju down his throat straight from the bottle, Jung Taewon also turned into a dog less than an hour after arriving.

‘I don’t know why he keeps making that growling sound.’

I stood up with a bitter, chilling smile, paid only for what I had consumed so far, and calmly left the restaurant.

If even one of them had been sober, I wouldn’t have gone home alone.

‘I can’t help it.’
‘I’m not confident I can take three guys, each a head taller than me, home.’
‘I care more about myself than others, you see.’

‘They’re going to die from a hangover tomorrow.’

‘If they’re only suffering tomorrow, that’ll be lucky.’

They drank so much that even I, a heavy drinker, felt tipsy, so they would have to suffer for several days.

‘May the lightweights rest in peace from their hangovers.’

At least it would be quiet for a while as they were passed out.

‘Time to play games.’

(4)

[Whisper/IsHeATruePlayer>DontOrderMe: You’re a real piece of trash, you bastard.]

[Whisper/DontOrderMe>IsHeATruePlayer: Thanks.]

A whisper flew in from my university classmate, Choi Young-soo.

It wasn’t for any big reason, but… despite everything, I had contacted Choi Young-soo on my way home and asked him to clean up the mess, worried that leaving the drunkards might lead to bigger trouble.

[Whisper/IsHeATruePlayer>DontOrderMe: This mess is going on your tab.]

[Whisper/IsHeATruePlayer>DontOrderMe: Conscienceless bastard.]

[Whisper/DontOrderMe>IsHeATruePlayer: Okay, thanks.]

He usually didn’t say much when I entrusted Moon Young-yoon to him, but this time, entrusting three people simultaneously must have been too much.

Even after several days, he still sent me such whispers every time I logged into the game.
If he wasn’t in the game, he’d appear on private chat and complain.

[Whisper/DontOrderMe>IsHeATruePlayer: Buying food.]

[Whisper/IsHeATruePlayer>DontOrderMe: Buy me meat.]

[Whisper/DontOrderMe>IsHeATruePlayer: Okay.]

Up to this point, it was just a normal happening, so there wasn’t much of a problem.

It was only natural to buy him food, as he had suffered because of me.

If a problem arose after that day, it was this.

I stared with peculiar eyes at the chat that appeared at the bottom of the monitor, then rubbed my dry face.

[Whisper/PatchNote>DontOrderMe: I had a dream today, do you know what kind of dream it was?]

‘I don’t really want to know.’

I wasn’t curious about other people’s dreams.

[Whisper/PatchNote>DontOrderMe: You appeared in my dream, hyung.]

[Whisper/PatchNote>DontOrderMe: Is that why? The sky is so clear today, you know?]

Without any reply, I turned my head and looked out the window.

Beyond the window, slightly obscured by blackout curtains, I could see heavy snowflakes falling.

Overcast gray clouds covered the sky, blocking out even a sliver of light, and with the swirling snow driven by strong winds, nothing but pure white snow was visible in the landscape.

‘Is he sane?’

‘There was a heavy snow warning today; does he seriously think the weather is clear?’
‘What on earth is his standard?’

[Whisper/DontOrderMe>PatchNote: Is that so.]

I wanted to add, ‘So what do you want me to do about it?’, but I forced myself to hold it in, exerting mental effort.

It was a saving grace that it was chat, giving me time to think and choose my words.

If he had blurted out such things to my face in real life, curses that hadn’t passed through my brain’s filter would have spontaneously erupted.

[Whisper/PatchNote>DontOrderMe: Hyung, are you good at cooking ramen?]

[Whisper/DontOrderMe>PatchNote: Yes.]

[Whisper/PatchNote>DontOrderMe: I’m not very good at cooking ramen… Can I come to your house to eat ramen, hyung?]

[Whisper/DontOrderMe>PatchNote: Eat cup ramen.]

‘Why would he come to someone else’s house to eat ramen when there’s instant cup ramen that you can quickly make in 3 minutes by just adding powder and pouring in water?’

[Whisper/PatchNote>DontOrderMe: ㅠㅠㅠㅠ]

[Whisper/PatchNote>DontOrderMe: Then what are your favorite foods? Korean? Chinese? Western?]

[Whisper/DontOrderMe>PatchNote: Eating alone.]

[Whisper/PatchNote>DontOrderMe: I see…]

I was utterly drained by the incessant whispers that kept appearing even as I pressed skill buttons to hunt mobs.

‘What on earth is this guy doing?’

‘The dungeon entry would be clearly displayed in the guild window, so why is he constantly whispering?’

‘Isn’t it basic game etiquette not to contact someone quietly when they’re concentrating?’

It was even more absurd coming from someone who should know better, and I also couldn’t figure out what he was aiming for.

He seemed to be getting friendly with other guild members lately; I wondered if he had picked up bad habits.

I quickly cleared the dungeon, exited to the field, and immediately sent a whisper to Beta noona.

[Whisper/DontOrderMe>Beta: You seem to be close with PatchNote-nim lately.]

[Whisper/Beta>DontOrderMe: Oh? Jealousy?]

[Whisper/DontOrderMe>Beta: ? Are you senile?]

I crumpled my face in exasperation, pouted my lower lip, and continued speaking.

[Whisper/DontOrderMe>Beta: I think this guy has picked up bad habits from you all.]

[Whisper/DontOrderMe>Beta: What did you teach him?]

[Whisper/Beta>DontOrderMe: LOLOLOLOLOLOL. Why? What is he saying?]

[Whisper/DontOrderMe>Beta: It’s the same as when you and some others used to whisper-bomb me for not playing with you.]

That was truly difficult back then.

At the time, I hadn’t separated the chat window for whispers from other chat windows.

Because of that, I almost wiped the party for not seeing party orders properly, and whenever irrelevant chats appeared during trades, I couldn’t reply to the trader and had to roll the mouse wheel, squinting to find the relevant chat.

[Whisper/DontOrderMe>Beta: You taught him, didn’t you? How to piss me off.]

[Whisper/Beta>DontOrderMe: LOL LOLOLOLOLOLOL.]

[Whisper/Beta>DontOrderMe: It’s damn funny, but it’s not me LOLOLOLOLOL.]

“…Not you?”

‘Then who taught that guy such idiotic behavior?’
‘There’s no one who would teach him besides Beta noona, is there?’