I Would Have Found You

However, even after reconsidering, while he could somewhat understand the past Beomwoo, it was difficult to accept the actions of his mother-in-law toward him.

He understood that she wanted her son to be perfect and flawless, and thus was dissatisfied with a spouse as insignificant as him.

He too thought he was woefully inadequate as Beomwoo’s spouse.

But if she disliked it so much, shouldn’t she have not arranged the marriage for the inheritance from the beginning?

Of course, his infertility was discovered later, so her subsequent nagging for a divorce was a separate matter…

During his past married life, Beomwoo’s extreme indifference and lack of consideration made it exhausting and difficult, but for the first time, he felt the surrounding environment had also been pressuring them.

Although his past marriage ultimately ended that way, if they had understood and considered each other even a little more, it might not have been so hard and lonely…

Just moments ago, he had delicious food in front of him, was listening to stories about Beomwoo’s student days abroad that he had been curious about, was understanding him, and his resentment was subsiding.

But merely recalling his past life filled him with piercing loneliness.

His mood became endlessly gloomy, helplessly sinking to the bottom.

Seeing Haejin’s expression darken instantly while listening to his old stories, Beomwoo, who had been sharing his past, watched his reaction again and muttered somewhat self-deprecatingly.

“My story must have been unpleasant.”

“Wh-what? Wh-what do you mean all of a sudden…?”

“This is why I don’t talk about myself often. I don’t share common ground with others.

People say it’s unpleasant and just the complaints of someone with a full stomach.”

Un-unpleasant? What nonsense is this?

Haejin’s mind, which had been submerged in past memories, was sharply pulled back.

Haejin widened his eyes like a startled rabbit and tried to deny it, saying what strange thing was he saying, but Beomwoo muttered bitterly as if he knew it all.

No… That’s really not it.

Of course, he had thought it sounded like the complaints of someone with a full stomach, but he didn’t find it unpleasant.

Moreover, his expression darkened not because of Beomwoo, but because he remembered his mother.

He would never see her again, and it was all pointless now, but he seemed to have sunk too deep into thought.

Haejin quickly shook off his gloomy thoughts and hastily shook his head.

“N-no, really not! I didn’t think it was unpleasant.

I was just thinking about something else…”

“Something else?”

“Yes, that…”

It was true he was thinking of something else, but he couldn’t answer.

It involved his past life, and he thought confessing his thoughts about his mother might cross a line.

No matter how lacking Beomwoo’s familial bonds or how much resentment he harbored, he probably wouldn’t like others criticizing them.

He had to come up with some excuse, but if he was caught lying, it would seem like he truly thought Beomwoo unpleasant and got caught.

Instead of mentioning the negative thoughts about her, Haejin indirectly mentioned another thought he had.

“If one’s actions are so restricted, meeting people must have been… difficult too, I imagine.”

Given that she even controlled him, cutting off contact with friends after marriage, it was obvious she did the same to Beomwoo, but Haejin pretended not to know.

When Haejin spoke, Beomwoo let out a small sigh as if saying ‘ah, so that’s why,’ and nodded seriously.

“That too, yes.

Just look at offering inheritance only if one marries a specific person—it’s absurd.

This isn’t child’s play.”

“……”

Marriage…

Beomwoo said it was understandable Haejin would think that way; just the offer of inheritance to whoever married Haejin showed what kind of family this was.

He clearly found it absurd how a successor could be decided this way.

The inheritance condition was set by the chairman.

This was something his mother had also complained about.

Recalling the inheritance condition, it seemed to clearly show a family atmosphere where not just his mother, but even the chairman tried to control his children according to his whims.

Haejin had only seen the chairman in his childhood and didn’t know his personality well, but listening to Beomwoo, the chairman also seemed similarly coercive.

As Haejin was momentarily lost in thought, Beomwoo, as if having many thoughts, continued.

“To be honest, I found the inheritance condition absurd, but I didn’t particularly object to being told to marry a specific person.

After all, love is an emotion that deceives the brain and inevitably fades someday.

I couldn’t understand why such personal feelings were necessary for marriage.

If the conditions matched and it benefited both, I thought it could be a transaction.”

“……”

Beomwoo said that while he put it that way, he didn’t have major objections to a contract marriage itself.

In this life and the previous one, when he first met Beomwoo, his words—that marrying him would give them both something, so wasn’t it a good deal—naturally came to mind.

Haejin had also heard somewhere that love’s expiration period is about three years.

That falling in love produces effects similar to drugs in the brain.

That it lasts three years.

While it might have some hormonal credibility, as someone who wanted to find true love and marry, it wasn’t a story he wanted to believe.

In this life, he had refused Beomwoo’s proposal, saying he wanted to marry someone he loved.

Was he mocking that?

Feeling somewhat sour, Haejin waited for him to continue, as his words didn’t seem finished.

Beomwoo took a moment to gather his breath before continuing.

“But now my thoughts have changed a little.”

“…How?”

“I too want to marry someone I love, like you, Haejin. Without anyone’s interference or misunderstandings.

A marriage with a beloved spouse… that kind of marriage.”

As he spoke, he looked directly at Haejin.

That he now wanted true love, regardless of gaining inheritance through marriage.

That the person was him.

His eyes clearly stated it.

At Beomwoo’s words, Haejin bit the inside of his cheek.

Although Beomwoo hadn’t directly confessed his feelings before, this was far more flustering than then.

Even if not directly stated, it sounded like he was saying he liked him, that he wanted to marry him with love.

There had been several moments when he almost wavered for Beomwoo, and each time, he forcefully denied it, thinking, ‘It must be sweet talk to deceive me,’ ‘It must be excellent acting.’

But hearing such words in a house where only the two of them were present, with no distractions, made it impossible.

He couldn’t avoid the emotional wave crashing directly into him.

As Haejin froze, unable to react, silence flowed for a moment.

Belatedly regaining his senses, Haejin, thinking Beomwoo might have noticed his agitation, hastily pretended not to understand the meaning.

“Y-yes, that kind of marriage would be nice.

I also told you I wanted to marry that way…”

“That’s why it’s regrettable.

If our meeting hadn’t been like this, you might have believed my feelings weren’t false.”

“……”

He had tried to act oblivious, thinking it wasn’t about him.

But Beomwoo, as if unwilling to let it slide, spoke more directly than before.

His desire to marry someone he loved meant he wanted to marry him.

Beomwoo actively speaking of love, not letting him feign ignorance or avoid it, felt extremely awkward, and the situation was embarrassing.

Yet, habitually, he denied it, thinking what he just said couldn’t be true, no matter how carried away by the atmosphere.

“If our meeting hadn’t been like this, wouldn’t we have never crossed paths? We live in different worlds.”

If there were no inheritance involved and Beomwoo helped him so devotedly and said he loved him, he would have definitely believed his feelings.

However, although Haejin and Beomwoo were both South Korean citizens, their worlds were distinctly separate.

Society might claim no class divisions, but invisible lines clearly demarcated them.

Their neighborhoods, lifestyles were clearly different; if not for this circumstance, they seemed like people who wouldn’t even pass each other on the street.

So, wasn’t it a contradiction that they even met without this situation?

As Haejin answered with that thought, Beomwoo listened for a moment before shaking his head slightly.

“As you said, without these conditions, we might never have met.”

“That’s right…”

Although Haejin was the one who said no, seeing Beomwoo agree drained his energy.

He had always been aware of their differences, but hearing Beomwoo acknowledge it from his own mouth felt different.

As Haejin answered in a drained voice, almost muttering, Beomwoo continued, still looking directly at him.

“But I would have sought you out, Haejin.”

“……”

“In some way. Even if our worlds had changed.”

As if stating a certainty. His voice was firm.