A Hungry Tou, a Suspicious Offer, and Sister Jie’s Proposition

“I’m starving!”

They had barely left the Exorcism Department when Tou, feeling utterly drained, lethargically kicked his Fourth Master, who was walking just ahead.

Although he had eaten breakfast, it was now well into the afternoon.

After trekking down the mountain for over four hours without a morsel for lunch, his stomach had long since felt as though it were plastered to his back.

“Little Tou, just bear with it a little longer!” Yue Ye Si said, turning back with a smile. “Once we complete the mission, I’ll treat you to a feast!”

“Such a long journey there and back? You can go by yourself!” Tou declared, clutching his stomach and squatting to the ground. He had no intention of moving until food appeared.

“No way, Little Tou! I can’t possibly leave you here alone!”

“You’re so adorable, Little Tou; some villain is bound to set their sights on you!”

“But I’m so hungry! I can’t take another step!”

Seeing Tou looking utterly dispirited, as if one foot were already in the grave, Yue Ye Si patted his shoulder encouragingly.

“Just a little more effort! I believe in Little Tou’s perseverance; you’ll surely hold out until the very end. Come on! The more time we waste here, the later we’ll get to eat!”

“No! No! No! Get me something to eat right now!”

Driven by an insatiable hunger, Tou lunged at his Fourth Master, flailing his limbs. He craved meat, and in his desperation, sank his teeth into Yue Ye Si’s forearm.

“Little Tou, stop being naughty! Let Master give you a kiss to replenish your energy!”

They tumbled together onto the bluestone path, with Yue Ye Si pinned beneath Tou. Seizing the opportunity, she wrapped her arms around his neck, sticking out her tongue and wiggling it playfully, seducing Tou with a sultry voice.

‘Kiss, a kiss!’

Tou’s face instantly flushed crimson, like a monkey’s backside, and he scrambled to his feet. Then, a thought struck him: ‘That rascal had just offered a kiss! Why did I mess up such a perfect opportunity?’

‘It must have been because Fourth Master didn’t hold him tight enough!’

Feeling utterly disgruntled, Tou pointed at Yue Ye Si and began to curse:

“You filthy pervert who’s always thinking about *that*! You’re trash! A scoundrel! What good are you? Die! Die! Die!”

Tou, feeling that mere insults weren’t enough to vent his frustration, vigorously kicked her incredibly supple backside.

“Oh, oh, oh! Excuse me,” a voice from behind interrupted.

Hearing a voice behind him, Tou turned and saw a girl with long reddish-brown hair, who extended a piece of bread wrapped in Xuan paper towards him.

“I just overheard you two talking about being hungry. I happen to have a leftover bun from lunch here. Please, take it.”

Tou took the bread, inhaling its delightful aroma. Just as he was about to take a bite, an arm draped over his shoulder from behind.

It was none other than his Fourth Master, Yue Ye Si, who spoke in a cautionary tone:

“Little Tou, how can you just accept things from strangers so casually? What if it’s drugged? You wouldn’t want your pretty little face to end up being used as someone’s plaything.”

At his master’s reprimand, Tou’s face flushed crimson once more. He recalled the yellow-covered books he’d read, where little girls would eat candy from strange, creepy uncles, get drugged, and then be kidnapped by villains.

‘If this woman had indeed slipped a drug into the bread, wouldn’t his fate be too grim to imagine?’

Thinking this, Tou recoiled two steps, pointing at the long-haired girl and shouting loudly:

“You pervert! What are your intentions, approaching me like this? Don’t even *think* about laying a hand on my body!”

“It seems I’m under suspicion, huh? Don’t worry, listen to me, I’m not a bad person.”

The girl, who introduced herself as Ji Jie, explained patiently, her emerald eyes twinkling, despite Tou’s outburst. “My name is Ji Jie, a Spirit Vein Realm martial artist who frequently accepts missions from the Exorcism Department. Everyone calls me Sister Jie.”

“Sister Jie?”

Tou began to scrutinize the person before him. She was about his height, and her smile resembled that of a pug. However, ‘Her chest is so big!’

‘Besides, where could a girl with such a large chest possibly be a bad person?’

Tou felt a pang of regret for his abruptness. Such a pretty girl, so well-endowed, so fair-skinned, and offering him delicious bread when he was practically starving—she had to be a good person.

He promptly turned back, glaring fiercely at Yue Ye Si, who had previously stopped him from eating the bread. With a huff, he addressed Ji Jie:

“Since you’ve stated you’re not a bad person, I’ll temporarily believe you. But if you dare to harm me, I’ll tie you up and beat you!”

“Mmm, so good, so good!”

Watching Tou devour the bread heartily, Yue Ye Si shook her head, a look of exasperated disappointment on her face. Then, she turned to Ji Jie, a hint of disdain curling her lips, and spoke coldly:

“Ji Jie, was it? What exactly are you doing, approaching us?”

“I merely saw this little sister crying out in hunger, and I just happened to have a piece of bread…”

“Hmph! It seems you’ve been following us ever since we left the Exorcism Department. And are you an idiot? Didn’t you just buy that bread from the bakery over there?”

Yue Ye Si interrupted her, pointing towards a bakery not far away. Just then, a little girl could be seen pointing at a bun on the counter, identical to the one in Tou’s hand, and saying:

“Uncle Diao (TL Note: Diao can mean ‘hanging’ or, colloquially, ‘penis/d*ck,’ often used in humorous double entendres), ten of those *diao* little buns for me!”

“Ah! It’s little Qiao Qiao, my dear! You’re growing prettier and prettier; you’ll surely be as beautiful as your mother when you grow up. By the way, this long, thick bread is a gift for your mother. Could you please hand it to her?”

“Hmph~, Uncle Diao is playing favorites! You give gifts to my mom, but you’ve never given me anything. Hmph!”

“How could that be? I’m very fond of little Qiao Qiao. Come into Uncle’s shop, and Uncle will show you a big goldfish!”

With eyes sparkling, the little girl then walked into the bakery, and the owner promptly hung a ‘Temporarily Closed’ sign on the door.

“Oh no! Is that little loli about to be abducted?!” Ji Jie exclaimed, concerned.

“Stop changing the subject! Quickly, tell me! What exactly do you want, approaching us like this? If you dare to harbor any ill intentions towards my Little Tou, I’ll destroy you!”

Yue Ye Si cared little for such matters. She was under orders from her Senior Disciple Sister to protect Tou and certainly didn’t want any ill-intentioned individuals lingering around him.

“Master, she doesn’t seem like a bad person!” Tou mumbled, munching loudly on his bread.

“Hmph! I don’t care if you’re good or bad; just leave us now!”

‘Good person or bad, all that mattered was keeping her away from Tou!’

However, upon hearing she was to be sent away, Ji Jie suddenly became flustered, her hands fidgeting nervously in front of her chest, as if she had something to say but couldn’t quite bring herself to utter it.

“See! I knew it! You clearly have malicious intentions towards us. If you don’t give us a reasonable explanation, I’ll strip you naked and hang you from the town gate today!”

“Actually, actually, I saw you accepted a mission, and I wanted to team up with you!”

“Team up?”

‘As the name implied, if a mission was particularly dangerous, multiple martial artists could complete it together.’

“But we don’t need a Spirit Vein Realm rookie like you! The bounty is so minuscule; there’s no way I’d split it with you!”

‘It was a joke! For her, a Celestial Realm witch, vanquishing a Golden Body Realm demon was simpler than crushing an ant.’

She certainly didn’t want a rookie joining her team just to leech experience, so she flatly refused!

“No! You’ve misunderstood. I’ve seen the mission you accepted. It’s at least a two-hour journey to Fan Lake Village from here. A round trip would surely mean it’s already dark by the time you return!”

“My house is quite spacious, and I live alone right now. If you let me join your team, you could stay at my place without any charge. After tonight, we can complete the mission together tomorrow. This is much better than finishing the mission tonight, returning to a closed Exorcism Department unable to exchange spirit stones, and having to sleep on the street, isn’t it?”