So you are very brave

After running around constantly, of course I was happy to take a nice bath in the morning.

But just as I had finished washing and was rubbing my wet hair, preparing to step out, an impatient Kefeier grabbed me and dragged me to the bed.

Then… she pushed me down.

“Mm~ ah… no, not there~”

“It’s going to break, it’s going to break! Be gentle, don’t use so much force…”

“Ah…”

Without a word, Kefeier climbed on top of me and began moving her hands all over.

Even if you’re the protagonist, and I don’t dare resist, isn’t this a bit too aggressive?

“Can you stop moaning like that? Quiet down!”

Then she gave me a symbolic punch on the chest.

“I’m writing a contract on you! Don’t make weird noises and distract me!”

Saying that, Kefeier shook the finger she had just bitten open, and then leaned closer to me.

With the sudden decrease in distance, I could clearly see her beautiful smile—even if she was trying to scare me.

“If I accidentally write a self-destruction spell into the contract, I won’t take responsibility.”

“Be my guest…”

My life is in your hands—do whatever you want with me.

As for her “hands moving all over me,” she was just writing a magical contract on my body.

Once I calmed down, Kefeier finally got up, though her hand didn’t stop moving.

She seemed to be in a good mood after the bath, and was finally willing to chat with me.

“Oujilide, the infamous con man—normally, you’d be rotting in a cell under the Tribunal right now.”

“And unfortunately, that letter you sent under the alias ‘Lei Feng’ really did get delivered… straight into the bedchamber of Queen Louise IV of the Grand Ying Empire, scaring Her Majesty so much she didn’t dare sleep there for half a month.”

“I just used the script—I mean, prophecy—to find a gap and secret passage to report the evil organization!”

“And that’s your excuse for sneaking into a girl’s room?! Don’t you want Her Majesty to get married someday?! Anyway! That passage has been sealed. Only a few people know about your letter. No matter how you explain yourself, the Tribunal won’t believe you. Based on your actions, you’d definitely be sentenced to death.”

I fell silent.

Of course I knew that—this was one of the many deaths I was supposed to face in the original script.

“But I’m one of the few who knows the alias ‘Lei Feng’. Since you confessed, I’ll believe you. However, because of your identity and your bizarre behavior—and your weird outfit—I need to place a unilateral contract on you to restrict your actions.”

“First, your location: I will be able to track you at all times. Second, communication: whenever I check in on you, you must immediately tell me what you’re doing. But! Don’t bother me without reason!”

“You seem to know nothing about magic, so I’ll teach you the basics—it’s stuff even students know. And finally…”

Halfway through her speech, Kefeier gave me a suspicious look.

“You should be angry about all these one-sided restrictions, but… you seem kind of… happy? You don’t have some weird fetish, do you?”

“I’m a perfectly healthy man!”

I don’t have any weird kinks—I’m just thrilled that this contract lets me cling to your protagonist-level thigh even tighter.

So it might seem like I lost by surrendering, but in truth, I totally won!

This contract means Kefeier can find me and contact me anytime—it’s like getting the personal number of a mafia boss who’ll show up with a van full of goons on demand!

My survival plan just got an upgrade!

Also… being straddled by a beautiful girl who’s drawing on my belly with her bloodstained finger—kinda hot, honestly…

But it seemed Kefeier noticed the same thing.

“…It’s done! Get up!”

Not wanting to acknowledge it, she blushed and quickly climbed off me.

Then she gave me a long, scrutinizing look and nodded.

“You’re good. Get dressed.”

“From now on, you’re free to do what you want within the laws of the Empire. I can’t watch you every second. But since you say you’ve turned over a new leaf, you can’t go back to being a con man.”

“If you’d like, I can help you figure out a new path.”

Do I even need to think?

I answered immediately.

“Hug your thigh.”

“Speak human language!”

“Serve you loyally!”

Bodyguard, errand boy, strategist, advisor—whatever you want to call it!

Besides, clinging to the protagonist’s thigh isn’t servitude—it’s called joining the protagonist’s party!

“Oujilide, I’m not interested in useless men.”

Kefeier flipped her hair—cold, proud, with all the airs of an “ice queen beauty.”

Fair point—would the protagonist ever want someone useless in their party?

“And I never expected your gratitude either.”

Her aloof attitude seemed more like a deliberate act than her true feelings—like she didn’t want to get too close to me.

Hmph, acting so cool!

There are plenty of pretty girls in the world—do I really need to hang myself from this one tree?

You won’t let me hug your thigh? I didn’t want to rely on you anyway!

So what if you’re the protagonist?

So what if your chest is big and white?

So what if your thighs are soft and smell nice?

So what if you’re rich and powerful?

So what if clinging to you means I won’t die a tragic death?

I, your humble—

Wait…

Idea!

“I can be your priest!”

“Priest? You, a shady con man, have credentials?”

“Credentials?”

“You don’t even have a license and you call yourself a legitimate priest?”

Wait… con artists have to pass exams now?! That’s the first I’ve heard of it in all my time playing the villain!

Kefeier actually seemed amused by my expression and laughed—genuinely this time.

And honestly… that smile was kind of enchanting.

“But based on what you did yesterday… hmm. Oujilide, if you really can pass the Empire’s priest qualification exam, I wouldn’t mind keeping a weirdly dressed priest like you around.”

She paused, then looked at me.

“So? Want me to take you there?”

Do I want that?

She’s literally offering me her thigh—of course I’m going to hug it!