Chapter 65: “I’m Here”

I wasn’t born with an outgoing personality.

“Quiet and obedient child,” my late mother used to say.

From a young age, I neither cried nor laughed much.

I would sit quietly or read books—quite different from other children my age who ran around playing and giggling.

My unusual demeanor left my mother rather perplexed.

They say a person’s inherent nature rarely changes without a special trigger.

True to form, I grew into an unremarkable and subdued adult.

I maintained a few close human connections—family and a small circle of friends.

Around them, I would occasionally raise my voice or laugh more often.

But that was before everything happened.

Now that I think about it, perhaps that’s when it began—when I shut myself in my room and started gaming nonstop.

I quit school and my part-time job, cutting myself off from the outside world.

Like a death row inmate waiting for the end, I holed up in my room, using my insurance payout as living expenses day after day.

I vaguely felt myself decaying.

That’s when I discovered Abyss and met Camilla within the game.

Amusingly enough, I became completely absorbed in a game for the first time in my life.

I had always ignored games, dismissing them as a waste of time.

So why did I suddenly get hooked?

Because, at least while I was playing, I didn’t have to think about anything.

Immersing myself fully in the game, I’d lose track of time until night fell and fatigue would force my eyes shut.

Before I knew it, I had become a top-ranked player.

Considering I had maintained that lifestyle for over two years, it wasn’t surprising.

What was peculiar, however, was that despite cutting off all ties with the outside world, I started streaming my gameplay, encouraged by the support of viewers.

It was a barebones stream—no microphone, no camera, just in-game footage—but for someone like me at the time, even that felt like a significant leap.

In the end, it meant that, despite pretending otherwise, I was someone who craved human connection.

I had chosen solitude myself, yet when faced with actual isolation, I sought indirect contact with the outside world.

A contradictory individual.

People’s nature doesn’t change.

That’s why, even after my body changed, I felt my personality remained much the same.

So, why am I reminiscing about the past now?

What’s making me dwell on thoughts of my personality?

Most likely, it’s because of the promise I have this evening.

I glance at my phone, reading messages I hadn’t checked until now.

Among them, one from Lily catches my eye.

She wrote, “Even if it’s just for a little while, I’d really appreciate it if you could come.”

Below that is a lengthy explanation, apologizing profusely, worried that she might be pressuring me.

Reading it, I couldn’t help but chuckle.

That, too, is part of Lily’s nature—a kind and gentle person who loves others but fears negative reactions.

Honestly, I had no reason not to go.

Hadn’t I resolved to live differently after my transformation?

I’d been making a conscious effort to go out more, even if it was forced.

I didn’t have any issues with the team members; in fact, they all seemed eager for me to join.

It only felt right to attend.

The reason I hesitated was, surprisingly, not internal but external.

I stare into the slightly streaked mirror.

On the other side stands a silver-haired woman.

Though I’ve grown accustomed to her appearance, I still occasionally feel awkward looking at her reflection.

Whether I’m meeting editors for work or heading to this gathering, I find myself worrying, like a self-conscious teenager, about what others might think of my appearance.

And honestly, can you blame me?

It’s hard to go about things as I used to with an appearance like this.

My mind may be the same, but my actions, attire, and much more have changed.

When meeting editors, at least there was the pretext of a professional setting.

This time, however, it’s purely a casual, personal gathering.

Transforming into Camilla’s body, with her face, and meeting people to deepen relationships for the first time felt just as nerve-wracking as starting my first live stream.

Well, I’d already said I would go, so it was too late to back out now.

It was one of those decisions made on impulse but later seemed like the right thing to do.

After all, I needed to get used to this body and face.

This meeting was just another step in that process.

[Han Kang: I’ve reserved a nice restaurant ^^]

[Raimtak: Wow! A restaurant! Wow! Steak! Lobster! Wine!]

…And, honestly, I wanted to try steak.

Embarrassingly, I’d never had steak before due to my financial situation.

It felt like a luxury to wish for such food when I was holed up at home, barely scraping by each day.

Han Kang, claiming to know the perfect restaurant, offered to treat us.

Recently, there had been unexpected expenses while encouraging Haim in her streams.

While my broadcasting earnings could cover living costs, extravagant meals like restaurant courses felt out of reach for now, so the offer was tempting.

It was a bit humiliating to think I was lured by food, but still.

Besides, Camilla—unlike the average woman—eats a lot.

If I’m going to feed this body, it might as well be something delicious and nutritious.

Even if I wasn’t worth it before, Camilla—this current me—is precious.

Yes, I want to dress Camilla in pretty clothes and feed her the best food.

For these combined reasons, I headed out, donning one of the new outfits I’d recently bought.

“Wow! Course meals! Wow! Wow! Wagyu! Beef! Lobster!”

“How many times are you going to say the same thing?”

A cheerful, lively man stood beside a woman with a wry smile.

Watching them, Lily thought they weren’t too different from what she had imagined.

Lily, a more reserved streamer compared to the average, took a breath before approaching them.

“Hello…! You’re Raimtak and Haktchu, right? I’m Lily!”

“Wow! Lily! Hello!”

“…Adorable! Our little Lily is here early?”

“Hehe…”

Haktchu, wide-eyed and squealing, held Lily’s hands and patted her head.

Meanwhile, Raimtak, scanning the surroundings with high energy, asked a question.

“We ran into each other just outside. Are we the last to arrive? Are the others already here?”

“No, no, you two are early. Han Kang reserved the room and went to the restroom, and the rest are on their way.”

It’s what they call “Streamer Time.”

For some reason, when streamers set appointments, a lot of them tend to arrive late.

She didn’t expect many to arrive on time, but over half had already shown up.

Lily, who had taken extra time to get here, nodded to herself, thinking she had done well to leave early.

“Let’s head inside…! The others should be here soon.”

“Alrighty!”

The restaurant had a quiet and elegant atmosphere, and even its exterior looked expensive.

Following Lily’s guidance, the two entered the reserved room and let out quiet exclamations of awe.

It was understandable.

Lily had also been left speechless when she first followed Han Kang into a restaurant and entered one of its private rooms.

Han Kang had subscriber numbers rivaling Taker, the so-called “King of Twi-shi VTube.”

The fact that he had exclusively booked such a grand restaurant hinted at his considerable financial power.

“Han Kang hyung is the best.”

“I wonder how much the bill will be.”

The two couldn’t contain their admiration as they took their seats.

While Haktchu busied herself snapping photos, perhaps to post on her SNS, the conversation continued.

“So, with Han Kang hyung and us three here, that just leaves Chunhoon-nim and Kayak, right?”

“Chunhoon-nim left a message five minutes ago. He’s almost here, isn’t he?”

“Has Kayak contacted anyone?”

“Oh, I got a message from him earlier.”

Lily recalled the personal message she’d received about an hour ago.

[Kayak: The weather’s nice today.]

It was a rather random message, yet Lily had been pleased that Kayak messaged her personally instead of the group chat.

Eager to respond, she’d written back enthusiastically, “Yes, oh, it really is! Such perfect autumn weather!”

There hadn’t been any further replies after that.

Kayak hadn’t even read her message from thirty minutes ago asking him to let her know when he arrived nearby.

It seemed like he wasn’t checking his phone.

“Well, he said he’d come. He’ll probably show up if we wait.”

“Honestly, we gathered early. At most streamer meetups, everyone’s at least 30 minutes to an hour late, apparently.”

Everyone nodded in agreement as Han Kang returned from the restroom.

They started selecting their course meals under his guidance.

“So, to sum up, Course A has more meat, and Course B is more seafood-heavy, right?”

“There are more detailed differences, but yeah, pretty much.”

“We can’t mix and match courses, can we? In that case, let’s decide by majority vote—”

Knock, knock.

“Oh, that must be Chunhoon-nim.”

“Why bother knocking? Come on in!”

“Wow, you’re here sooner than I—”

Lily, who had gone to greet the guest, froze in place.

Standing at the open door was not Chunhoon, whose face she knew well, but an unfamiliar woman.

The woman gave off an almost magnetic impression.

She had sleek silver hair, shimmering blue eyes, and pale, snow-like skin.

Her luminous hair cascaded like fallen snow over her shoulders, and her tired-looking, blinking gaze fixated on Lily.

Lily was at a loss for words.

“A woman? A teacher? No, maybe a foreigner who’s accidentally walked into the wrong room?”

“Uh, um, sorry… this room is ours—”

The woman’s steady gaze unnerved Lily, who finally grasped the situation and tried to explain in her halting English.

However, the woman’s response, spoken in familiar Korean, rendered Lily’s effort pointless.

“Hello.”

“It’s… uh, what?”

At that moment, the woman’s once-expressionless face softened, her seemingly cold eyes curving into a warm smile.

“I’m here, Lily-nim.”

Nonchalantly waving her phone, she left Lily speechless once more.