The Weight of Twelve Years

“Hey.”

Applying the holy water—said to be worth its weight in gold—restored my neck to its original state in no time. By the time I had changed my clothes, treated my wounds, and returned, Berinon was still sitting in the same spot. He acted as if the place was his own room. I felt bad for the knights who couldn’t even enter; to them, Berinon appeared to be part of the Second Son’s entourage, so they wouldn’t have dared to treat him roughly.

Finding it absurd that he wouldn’t even look at me despite the noise of my entrance, I tossed a potion at him. His dull gaze followed the bottle as it rolled across the sofa.

“Put that on your mouth and cheeks. I brought it because it looked like you wouldn’t even be able to open your mouth properly.”

“What is it you want to talk to me about?”

“Stop acting tough and just put it on.”

When I sat across from him and crossed my arms, radiating the energy that I wouldn’t budge until he applied it, Berinon obediently smeared the potion on his face. Cheeks, cheekbones, lips. As the torn and swollen areas healed rapidly, he started looking human again.

“I won’t allow you to interrupt me once I start talking. If you have something to say, say it now.”

“I’m sorry.”

Whether he had taken my earlier criticism to heart or not, a prompt apology slipped out. I waited for him to continue.

“I didn’t think you’d be that shocked. You really are close with Elliott. Usually, you wouldn’t have been fooled.”

“Pick one: are you going to be sarcastic, or are you going to apologize?”

“I’m serious. I saw how startled you were and intended to tell you it was a lie, but you had already run inside.”

Berinon, who had been throwing a fit earlier, had grown strangely calm. I revised Berinon’s chances of rehabilitation from 1% to 3%. At this rate, he was worth a shot.

When I told Elliott I was going to talk to Berinon, he had fumed, saying he knew I’d do this. Is this that bastard’s first time? Can you be sure it was really a mistake? You almost died. Everything he said was right. Whatever I said to him wouldn’t change his evaluation of Berinon, nor did it need to.

My decision to speak with him came from a sort of sense of duty. After all, Kyle Berinon was still a green, young brat. His life—and the Viscountess’s life—was too wasteful to be spent living like this. Of course, this wasn’t a movie. I didn’t expect an ending where my grand speech would move Berinon to repent for all his past deeds and live a righteous life from now on.

Still, nonetheless, someone had to say these words to him. To a brat without a single adult around to nag him, someone had to scold him and speak the bitter truth. It might not be common sense in the Empire, but at least in the world I came from, that’s how it was.

“It’s your freedom to apologize, but it’s my freedom to accept it.”

“I know.”

“I’ll think a bit more about whether to forgive you or not. Even if it wasn’t intentional, it’s a fact that someone almost died.”

Watching him nod quietly, it was hard to believe he was the same guy who had relentlessly bullied Elliott and me under the guise of “pranks.” I almost suspected he was acting this way on purpose because he knew I had a soft spot for kids. Stripped of the mask of a villain or a madman, Kyle Berinon was excessively quiet, exposing the wounds he had received.

“Apologize to the Viscountess, too.”

“……”

“Even if she isn’t your biological mother, the one who ended up being a mother to you was Viscountess Berinon. Do you even know what that musician looks like?”

“Yeah.”

Berinon let out a hollow laugh. “I went to find her once. At a concert,” he said, his voice calm, which made it sound even more depressing.

“Actually, I expected a little more. You know, that kind of thing. Recognizing each other at a glance.”

“I didn’t know you were the type to get absorbed in books. That only happens in novels. It doesn’t exist in reality.”

“Yeah. Turns out you’re right.”

A brief silence fell. I thought about it, but correcting his misunderstanding wasn’t my role. These are things the Viscountess should say herself. Even if he learned the truth, Clarie did leave him behind, so he might still harbor resentment, but the nature of the situation would be different.

“I didn’t come here to comfort you. I told you before: stop blaming your surroundings. In the end, it was your fault for acting that way. I get that you want to pour your resentment somewhere, and I get that you’re at an age where you think you’re the most miserable person in the world. But what exactly do you gain by doing that? Don’t put up a half-baked pride. That’s not pride; it’s just stubbornness.”

Berinon, who had been listening quietly, chuckled. It was a laugh similar to his usual one. In other words, it was annoying.

“Llewellyn, I’ve felt this for a while, but you really treat me like a child. Are you even aware we’re the same age?”

“Our mental ages are different. What do you expect when you act like a brat?”

I roughly pushed back my bangs that kept fluttering in front of my eyes. It wasn’t a lie. Even counting only my age in Korea, I was more than twice Berinon’s age. Since four years had passed since I became Llewellyn Edwill, the gap was significant.

“To my mother…”

“You only got angry because she was an easy target. You don’t even actually hate her. That’s what’s more full of shit.”

When Berinon asked, “Why do you think that?” I mocked him thoroughly. Mimicking the usual behavior of the Second Prince, it wasn’t hard to stir up emotions intense enough to make the opponent’s fists tremble.

“If you really hated her, you wouldn’t have been playing such a goody-two-shoes in front of her. The reason you stayed quiet while being called an angel was that you wanted to remain a beloved son, didn’t you?”

“……”

“Try denying it if it’s not true.”

“I do like you, but it’s a bit annoying when you act like you know everything.”

As if you aren’t annoying just by existing. I found it absurd but didn’t say it out loud. I didn’t have enough leisure to pick a fight with a guy who had grown fierce after being hit where it hurt.

“I don’t particularly expect you to change. I’m not your guardian. It’s none of my business how a guy who has no place in my life after today lives.”

“So you think it’s a waste of time.”

“The reason I’m bothering to come here and tell you this even though I’m exhausted is because it’s something someone needs to say at least once. I won’t care what choice you make afterward. If you keep living like that, then yes, this was a waste of time. If not, it might have some value.”

Berinon quietly lowered his eyes. The habitual smile was missing from his contemplative face.

“What are you, a dog with its tail on fire? Stop just running around causing trouble and take some responsibility. You’re twelve; you’re young, but you’re not so young that you can’t even do that.”

It was only after a long while that the answer came: “I’ll do that.” I couldn’t be sure if the 3% chance would succeed, but this wasn’t a bad start.

I stood up without lingering. It had been a long day, and holding onto a kid had drained my energy. Belatedly, hunger and fatigue hit me simultaneously, making it hard to decide what to do first.

“I’ve registered you for volunteer work starting next week. Come to this building and look for Sir Tales.”

“Huh?”

“Why the surprised face? I told you to take responsibility. If you have the energy to wander around anywhere, come here and run errands. I doubt they’ll make a kid do anything grand, but if your body is tired, you’ll talk less nonsense.”

That was a lie. I used the Second Son’s influence to stick him into volunteer work at the Knights’ cafeteria. It was a place that was always short-handed, so it wasn’t hard to create a spot. I put some thought into choosing a position that was as grueling as possible but left no room for complaints.

The Second Son suggested it might not be bad to attach him as a page, but if things went wrong there, the trouble would be bigger than expected. This was enough. He’d be working alongside commoners, so his pride would definitely take a hit. His body, which had never properly exercised, would be shaking from exhaustion. I couldn’t help but smile imagining him squatting down and peeling potatoes with all his might.

“There will be someone watching you, too. Good luck.”

13. Resolution

Blodgett—the kid version, Seth Blodgett—came to find me two days later. He had a surprised look on his face, likely having heard the story from his uncle.

“Are you… okay?”

“I’m fine,” I replied easily.

My body, having been doused in potions, was beyond fine; I was overflowing with energy. Even the side effect of drowsiness was welcome this time. I had finally slept deeply for the first time in a while. Since I had resolved the two biggest headaches in Robenus, there was nothing holding me back.

I hadn’t been able to keep checking on Berinon’s status, but the last time I saw him, most of the venom had drained out. I had also made an acquaintance in Luke, so I had achieved my goal for coming here to some extent.

Erkel hadn’t been able to pinpoint Luke’s keywords exactly.

[Alleys and… um, maybe a locket?]

Compared to the Crown Prince, the information was incredibly meager. When I pointed this out, he wrote ‘ㅠㅠ’ again, making the excuse that that’s just how things are with mains and subs.

Since we first met in the alleys, one condition was met. When I asked what the hell a locket was, an explanation of their first meeting in the original work followed.

While Llewellyn was serving as a knight, Luke was busy expanding his influence in the capital. Llewellyn, who became a knight backed by his family and the favor of the Crown Prince despite his mediocre abilities, and Luke, who crawled up from the bottom. The two happen to meet and get entangled in an incident. Intense interest signaled the beginning of love. Then, Luke picked up a locket that had been Llewellyn’s possession, and their connection began.

The problem was that I didn’t know if the keyword was ‘locket,’ ‘possession,’ or ‘lost item.’

I clicked my tongue. The Crown Prince fell in love at first sight, Cedric Klein was hooked by a letter, and now it was a lost item? Is he Cinderella? It’s not like I’m dropping a glass slipper.

The fact that he was a knight on a ‘mission’ might also be part of the keyword. For now, my final goal was to fulfill everything else.