Chapter 68: Courage for Farewell (2)

《I Heard Something Strange Today》

I heard something strange today. Someone said that my ideal type is Roden.

A dependable, manly, righteous, cool, and strong guy.

Hmm… well, I do admit some of that, but I’m not sure about the “cool and strong” part yet.

He did do something a little cool recently, but still, he’s not strong.

And that messy hair of his doesn’t even look handsome!

So, there’s no way Roden is my ideal type.

Besides, we’re just close friends.

— From Cilia’s Diary.

“Roden!”

Cilia stormed through the mansion, her fast, stomping footsteps echoing down the halls like an alarm.

Her frustration was justified, but along with that, she also felt strangely hurt and disappointed.

She had always thought of them as close friends, sometimes even like inseparable companions.

A friend she could always rely on, someone she trusted.

With noble children, she had to maintain etiquette and couldn’t even joke around freely.

But with Roden, she could.

Every day, they bantered and played around, breaking the dull routine of noble life.

Sometimes they physically pushed and shoved in their playful fights, and sometimes, they shared their worries and comforted each other in a teasing way.

A friend she could be completely comfortable with, someone she truly cared for.

And now, that same Roden was about to leave for a long journey to the northern lands.

Yet, she had to hear about it from a third party.

It made her feel like she was burning with anger.

Shouldn’t he have told her first?

They were best friends, after all.

That’s why she felt angry, sad, and strangely… hurt.

“That idiot…! Just wait until I catch him!”

With determination, Cilia rushed towards the annex after hearing that Roden had gone there to clean.

The annex wasn’t as large as the main mansion, but as a duke’s property, it was still a sizable three-story building.

But there was no way she wouldn’t find him.

• Bang!
• Bang!

As soon as she entered, she began flinging open doors and checking every corridor.

She kept her mouth shut, knowing that if she called out, he might just hide again.

Her eyes, however, were burning with fury.

• Tap tap tap tap!

After searching the first floor, she lifted her dress slightly and dashed up the stairs.

And soon, she found a familiar face.

“Nella!”

“Huh? Lady Cilia?”

“Huff… Huff…!”

“Take a breath, Lady Cilia.”

Nella, one of the mansion’s servants, looked at her worriedly as she gasped for air.

Cilia had run around the entire estate, completely disregarding her noble demeanor.

But she couldn’t stop now.

She had to find Roden and unleash all the emotions swirling inside her.

“Huff… Huff… Have you seen Roden?”

“Roden?”

Nella hesitated for a moment before shaking her head.

“Well, I saw him heading to the annex to clean, but I haven’t seen him since.”

“I see. Thanks…!”

Like a spring recoiling, Cilia bolted off again and resumed her search of the second floor.

Still, there was no sign of him.

With no hesitation, she sprinted up to the third floor.

But he wasn’t there either.

“What the hell…! Where is he?!”

Stomping her foot in frustration, she quickly descended the stairs.

He must have gone somewhere else after all.

Perhaps the training grounds behind the annex?

• Tap tap tap tap!

She sped down the steps so fast her feet barely touched the ground.

Then, she gripped the stair railing and scanned the area.

And that was when she finally found him.

“Gotcha!”

The Roden she had been searching for so desperately.

After running around so much that sweat dampened her back, she had finally tracked him down.

Now, he would pay the price for keeping secrets.

She would unleash all her pent-up frustration and disappointment on him.

She would scold him for treating their friendship so lightly.

And yet, for some reason, as she gazed down at him, she found herself smiling.

The burning rage in her eyes faded, replaced by a strange joy.

Even though he had ignored their friendship, seeing him again made her smile as naturally as ever.

“Roden…!”

She had planned to be furious.

She had planned to say so much.

But why?

Why wasn’t she angry anymore?

Roden, having finally noticed her, looked up and froze.

That stupid, clueless face of his only made her frustration melt away.

Had she missed him after not seeing him for a few days?

Why did looking at his dumb face make her want to laugh?

Yeah, that must be it.

It’s not because she was happy to see him.

It’s just because he looks ridiculous.

“Oh… right. I already cleaned the second floor.”

Roden turned away and muttered the most obvious lie.

Cilia had just checked every inch of the second floor, and it was still filthy.

He was lying—clearly trying to avoid her.

That made Cilia suddenly sprint down the stairs again, her feet moving before she even realized it.

Then, she stopped right behind him.

Roden barely managed to take a few steps before she caught up.

Still smiling, she called out to him.

Even though she knew he was leaving in a few days, even though the thought of it made her incredibly sad and frustrated, for some reason, she couldn’t stop smiling.

“Hey! Deloden Roden! What’s your deal?!”

But instead of yelling at him in anger…

Her voice came out like a childish pout.

“Ack!”

Cilia’s voice rang out loudly, echoing all the way down the long corridor.

Roden flinched, his shoulders jerking up.

It was the tone she used when she was truly furious.

“When you’re really mad, you use my full name… huh.”

It had been a long time since he had heard her call him Deloden Roden.

Not since that time, a year ago, when he had accidentally walked in on her bathing while cleaning.

• Thud thud thud!

The sound of someone stomping down the stairs with great force filled his ears.

And before he could even react, Cilia had already closed the distance, standing right in front of him.

“Hey! Don’t you have something to tell me?!”

Hands on her hips, she looked up at him with expectant eyes.

The smile that had been on her lips moments ago was now carefully hidden.

She didn’t want to laugh in front of him so easily.

Roden sighed, placing the bucket down on the floor.

It was time to say what needed to be said.

He had been putting it off, but there was no more running away.

Not when she had already found out.

“I’m leaving. I’m going to the northern lands, following Duke Lucilan.”

His voice was steady, as if the matter was of no great importance.

Cilia, however, froze.

“…What?”

She was caught completely off guard.

Roden took advantage of the moment and continued, keeping his tone casual.

“I’m going to help the Duke. It’ll be a good experience, I think. The northern lands are wild, which makes them great for training.”

“A-Are you serious?!”

Her voice wavered with disbelief, but more than that—deep-seated resentment.

I wanted to scold him.

I wanted to reprimand my best friend for keeping such shocking news from me.

But somehow, instead of anger, my voice was filled with resentment.

“…What’s so great about it?”

“Whether it’s great or not! That’s not the point! You should have told me!”

“It’s just an expedition. It’s not like I’m going to war or anything. Once the job Duke Lucilan planned is done, I’ll be back. So why are you making such a fuss?”

As Cilia lashed out, Roden responded with a feigned indifference.

And to be fair, he wasn’t entirely wrong.

He didn’t know how long this mission would take, but once it was over, he would return to this mansion.

Of course, anything could happen in between, and the plan might end sooner than expected.

But to him, this was just another mission.

“And I might come back early.”

“But you don’t know when!”

“That’s true. Why? Are you upset that you won’t have anyone to bother?”

“What?!”

Roden smirked as he teased her.

And for that, he had to pay with a swift flick to the forehead.

Thunk!

“Ow! Hey!”

“Ugh! Who said I’d miss you?! You think some inexperienced brat like you can survive in the brutal northern lands?!”

Just as expected.

Cilia masked her worry with sharp words, trying to hide her feelings.

Roden simply rubbed his forehead and chuckled again.

“What’s so funny?!”

“Pfft, just as I predicted.”

“What?!”

“Anyway, I’ll be back, so don’t worry. Deloden Roden will return much stronger than before. And when I do, I won’t go easy on you in a match. Even if you’re a noble lady.”

Cilia’s fists clenched.

Her trembling pupils reflected her growing frustration.

He was leaving for a treacherous land, where biting cold and wild beasts lurked at every turn.

She was worried. She was anxious.

And yet, he stood there, acting as if it was nothing.

It was infuriating.

She was terrified for him, and he had the audacity to act so casually.

“You—! Even if you get stronger, you’ll never beat me!”

“We’ll see about that when I return.”

“Just don’t you dare die!”

“Pfft, who do you take me for? I’m going to be the greatest swordsman in the world, you know?”

“Ha! As if! Just go and drop dead, why don’t you?!”

“…Wait, so do you want me to die or not?”

Roden’s playful tone only stoked her frustration further.

Her irritation kept growing.

“Ugh! You idiot! Apologize!”

“Huh? Apologize? For what?”

Roden’s face scrunched up in genuine confusion as he tilted his head.

“J-Just apologize!”

“But why? I’m just going on a mission. Why would I need to apologize to you, dummy?”

His frown deepened as he picked up his water bucket.

It wasn’t that he was angry at Cilia.

He just wanted to get this over with.

He wanted this moment to pass, for everything to return to normal.

He wished they could just bicker and move on, like always.

“Move. I need to clean the training grounds.”

But Cilia, still fuming, stood firmly in place.

Roden sighed before deciding to simply walk around her.

“Hey! Roden!”

“…What now?”

He stopped but didn’t turn around, responding with an irritated tone.

Not because he was annoyed at her.

He just wanted this whole thing to be over.

“…Apologize.”

Her voice was no longer loud.

She didn’t want to shout anymore.

The more she yelled, the more it felt like she was losing.

She was upset, anxious, and worried sick.

Yet, Roden didn’t seem the least bit affected by their impending separation.

And that made it feel so unfair.

Like she was the only one feeling this way.

Like she was the only one who would miss him.

So, if he wouldn’t feel the same, then at the very least—she wanted an apology.

She couldn’t quite explain why, but she needed to hear it.

And then, with a huff, she would turn away, hiding all her sadness, her longing, and her disappointment.

And when the day of his departure finally arrived, she wanted to send him off like it was nothing.

She had always won against Roden.

Maybe it was because of their status as noble and servant.

Or maybe it was because she was just better than him.

In skill, in wit—she had always won.

But right now, it felt like she was losing.

And she hated that feeling.

She wanted to flip the situation around.

Even if it was just by making him apologize.

“…Apologize.”

That’s why her childish demand continued.

“Sigh… I really don’t get you sometimes.”

Roden exhaled heavily before turning around.

Fine.

If this was what it took to end this awkward moment, then so be it.

In a few days, she would come to terms with his departure.

She’d understand.

She would realize it wasn’t a big deal.

That it was just a mission, and he would return.

So, he might as well give her what she wanted now.

Roden closed his eyes and exaggeratedly bowed.

“Alright, alright. I’m sorry, Lady Cilia~.”

His voice was laced with sarcasm, playfully mocking her.

He had no idea what he was apologizing for, but if it would end this, he’d do it.

Then, as he straightened up and looked at her—

“Ci-Cilia…?”

Cilia was swallowing back tears.

She bit her lip, trying desperately not to cry.

But her wide eyes were already brimming with unshed tears.

And before she could stop them, they fell.

A silent but undeniable tremble ran through her body.

Finally, the weight of everything crashed down on her.

“You idiot… How can you just leave like this…?”