I Knew I Should Stop—But I Chose Him Instead

Jeongha suppressed his instincts with all his might, trying to escape the studio, and Haeyoon imagined Baek Jeongha’s pheromones, invisible to his eyes.

From Jeongha’s words that it might be a rut, the studio was probably filled with his scent.

What mattered here was that Haeyoon, a Beta, couldn’t perceive those pheromones at all.

So Haeyoon couldn’t easily understand.

An Alpha’s instincts become more pronounced during a rut.

Since it’s a purely physical reaction, it wouldn’t be strange to get excited around an Omega you didn’t even care about.

But with a Beta, it was different.

Regardless of individual thoughts on relationships between dynamics and non-dynamics, a dynamic’s instincts manifest only towards other dynamics.

Meaning an Alpha who normally had no interest in Betas wouldn’t suddenly want to f*ck one just because they were in rut.

Of course, there were exceptions.

Whether dynamic or non-dynamic, they were all humans with emotions, so if an Alpha loved a Beta, it wouldn’t be strange for them to go into heat for them, breaking their inherent boundaries.

And here again, Haeyoon saw Baek Jeongha, practically begging him not to come near.

Baek Jeongha, who could have taken anyone to bed if he wanted, was in heat for a Beta, Seo Haeyoon.

Jeongha’s condition, however one looked at it, could only be interpreted that way.

That fact gave Haeyoon a strange feeling.

An inexplicable sense of relief and anxiety, excitement and fear.

Emotions that seemed like they couldn’t coexist swirled together, dizzying him.

But amidst the chaotic feelings, one thing was clear.

The desire not to send Jeongha away like this.

He knew what it meant to hold onto Baek Jeongha here.

Furthermore, he knew how much of a burden it was for a Beta’s body to sleep with an Alpha in rut.

That’s why Jeongha was desperately trying to pull away too.

Paradoxically, that very sight of Jeongha only stimulated Haeyoon more.

How precious Seo Haeyoon was to Baek Jeongha, how much he wanted to protect him—he could see that feeling as if he could touch it, and his fear melted away like snow.

What this feeling was, whether it was love or not, what kind of relationship he wanted with Baek Jeongha—those complicated thoughts didn’t affect him at this moment.

He simply wanted to share Baek Jeongha’s kindness, his warmth, and the heat and desire he was feeling right now.

It was a longing Haeyoon had never experienced before.

“It’s okay… so don’t go.”

When he came to his senses, Haeyoon was already blocking Baek Jeongha’s path.

“Move.”

Even though his eyes were already devouring Haeyoon, Jeongha growled.

Haeyoon shook his head.

“No.

Stay here.”

“Do you know what you’re saying right now, hyung?

I can’t hold back any longer.”

Jeongha’s eyes were nearly bloodshot from how much he was holding back.

Imagining Baek Jeongha’s pheromones pressing against his entire body, Haeyoon spoke in a firm voice.

“I’m not a child who doesn’t know anything, Jeongha.

I know exactly what state you’re in right now.”

“f*ck….”

“Even knowing that, I want you to… stay here.”

Haeyoon’s voice, uttered clearly, held a different kind of heat.

It was Seo Haeyoon’s longing for Baek Jeongha, who had willingly stepped into the mud with him during the most miserable, filthiest moment of his life.

Jeongha stared at Haeyoon from inches away without blinking.

His eyes were those of a predator stalking its prey.

Haeyoon didn’t avoid or reject that gaze; he accepted it.

As if willingly baring his neck.

It wasn’t cowardice or submission.

Rather, it was courage.

Even knowing he might break, Haeyoon was ready to throw himself away.

“Don’t regret it.”

Baek Jeongha said.

Haeyoon couldn’t answer at all.

The heat, hot enough to burn, consumed him without a moment’s gap.

“Hngh…!”

Haeyoon’s stifled moan was swallowed into Jeongha’s mouth.

Jeongha’s hot tongue immediately opened Haeyoon’s mouth and dug inside, wildly rummaging through the small space.

As Haeyoon’s legs gave way and he stumbled, Jeongha roughly pushed him towards the sofa.

Haeyoon’s retreating feet didn’t touch the ground properly, but he didn’t fall.

Because Jeongha, wrapping an arm around his waist, lifted him very lightly.

“Hng… ngh…!”

Out of breath, Haeyoon turned his head away from Jeongha’s lips to breathe.

Then Jeongha, growling low in his throat, immediately followed, swallowing his breath again.

At the same time, Jeongha lifted Haeyoon’s legs, which were desperately trying to find the ground, wrapped them around his own waist, quickly moved to the sofa, and laid Haeyoon down.

“Haa… ha….”

Only after lying on his back on the sofa was Haeyoon finally free from Jeongha’s tongue, gasping heavily.

The sofa creaked under Jeongha’s weight as he climbed on top of him.

The sound seemed like a warning, and Haeyoon reflexively pushed at Jeongha’s shoulders.

But instead of being pushed away, Jeongha grabbed his wrists, pinned them to both sides, and spoke.

“You said it was okay.”

It was a low, cool voice.

Haeyoon swallowed dryly.

The unfamiliar voice, rather than fear, became a thrilling stimulation.

Jeongha, silently meeting his trembling gaze, soon lowered his head, lightly bit Haeyoon’s chin, and continued.

“You held onto me… saying it was okay, so don’t go.”

Even his polite speech, usually found endearing, felt different in this moment.

It was like hearing an irresistible command.

“So don’t push me away.”

“Yeah.

Mm-hmm….”

Haeyoon answered obediently.

After biting his chin and sucking on his lower lip like a piece of candy, Jeongha pulled back for a moment, then quickly removed Haeyoon’s shirt.

The sudden contact with the studio air made goosebumps rise on Haeyoon’s skin.

Jeongha, with a satisfied expression, leaned over him again.

“Ah…!”

Jeongha’s body touching his bare skin was so hot that Haeyoon let out a small gasp without meaning to.

His skin, sensitized by the sudden exposure, felt the heat radiating from Jeongha’s body even more acutely.

Jeongha’s hands lightly gripped Haeyoon’s waist, then rubbed up his skin, groping towards his chest.

At the touch of another person, after such a long time, Haeyoon’s breath quickened.

Jeongha, already rubbing his thumb against Haeyoon’s erect nipple, pressed his lips to his neck again.

“Hot….”

Haeyoon whispered like a moan, squeezing his eyes shut.

Jeongha’s body, his breath, his lips and tongue—all of it was too hot, like it would burn him.

And naturally, Haeyoon’s reactions only excited Jeongha more.

“Ah, Jeongha…!”

Haeyoon called Jeongha’s name desperately as he bit down on his neck and squeezed his chest hard.

It wasn’t that he wanted or was calling for anything in particular.

The name just slipped out, overwhelmed by the unbearable stimulation.

Though Jeongha was the one making things difficult for Seo Haeyoon right now, the only person Haeyoon could cling to was Baek Jeongha.

“I like your scent, hyung….”

After leaving bite marks on Haeyoon’s neck, Jeongha buried his nose near his collarbone and muttered.

Haeyoon, who had been moaning with a feverish face, shook his head.

“I don’t have pheromones….”

“What do you mean?

You have such a good scent….”

Jeongha’s hazy voice was an unfamiliar tone he had never heard before.

He sounded half out of his mind, and surprisingly, Haeyoon was aroused by that voice.

The fact that he was the one who had made Baek Jeongha like this was thrilling, and every time Jeongha whispered, goosebumps rose and fell along his spine.

His mind felt like he was dreaming, unreal, yet the sensations from his body were too vivid.

On his neck, collarbone, and chest, red marks quickly multiplied due to Jeongha’s careless bites.

Haeyoon wanted to regain his senses somehow, but the heat rising to the top of his head made thinking impossible.

The ceiling at the edge of his vision spun dizzily, so Haeyoon just closed his eyes.

“Don’t close your eyes.”

As if sensing it, Jeongha immediately scolded him.

Not satisfied with fondling his chest, Jeongha’s hand, which had been pinching and tormenting his erect nipples, now grabbed Haeyoon’s chin.

Haeyoon opened his eyes at the commanding voice, and Jeongha’s fiery, burning eyes were embedded in his.

“Don’t close your eyes, watch carefully.

Who it is that’s holding you right now….”

Who it is that’s holding you.

Those words immediately took the form of a snake, slithering up Haeyoon’s body.

That was right.

Literally, Haeyoon was preparing to be held by Jeongha.

Having s*x with someone other than Oh Jaeyeol was a first in Haeyoon’s life.

The unfamiliar sensation soon became fear, also evoking unnecessary guilt.

Even though he had no intention of going back, he felt like he was crossing a line of no return.

Baek Jeongha was Seo Haeyoon’s another first.

His body trembled at the new realization.

Though he couldn’t smell Jeongha’s pheromones, he felt surrounded by surging flames.

Haeyoon raised his arms to embrace Jeongha.

He couldn’t put much strength into it, but it was okay because Baek Jeongha leaned down and deeply held him in return.

So Jeongha’s words to watch carefully who was holding him were practically an unnecessary warning.

Because the name of every desire Seo Haeyoon felt right now was Baek Jeongha.