Don’t hold on to me anymore

A heavy silence flowed.
Theron felt his heart tighten, but he had to endure it.
At the end of that seemingly eternal wait, Selene opened her mouth.
“According to what you said, by demolishing this building, you’ve caused a huge loss to the company you’ve worked so hard to build, and you’ve also failed to repay your mother for your life.”
Theron nodded, pretending to be composed.
“I realized that what’s important is neither money nor guilt.”
“…”
“To me, you are the most important.”
Selene’s eyes flinched for a moment.
But as if it had never happened, they returned to their cold state, like a mirage.
“So, do you expect me to take you back because of this?”
“I said I’m not forcing you, not expecting anything.”
“This situation itself is a form of coercion.”
“I’m sorry if you feel that way, but this was my last resort. I felt like I would go crazy if I just let you go without doing anything.”
Selene looked at Theron.
Her green eyes, which were hard to read today, were just static.
“Do you really not expect anything from me?”
At Selene’s question, Theron put his fingers between his shirt collar and pulled it open.
Hmph.
A frustrated sigh escaped his lips.
“No, I do.”
“Tell me.”
“Will you listen if I tell you?”
Selene’s gaze turned cold again.
Theron felt a cold sweat.
‘Damn it, to fall for a leading question so easily.’
“How could I not expect anything? Of course, I hope you’ll forgive me even a little because of this.”
In the end, Theron confessed his true feelings.
After all, no matter what he lied about, it would be found out.
It would be good if Selene were moved even a little by this true feeling.
However, contrary to his wish, Selene was still firm.
“Theron, just because you do this doesn’t mean I’ll change my mind about studying abroad.”
‘Study abroad.’
Suddenly, that word pierced his head like the tip of a needle.
‘Yes, I did this because I was scared of hearing that.’
At that chilling word, Theron decided to put aside the demand to be forgiven immediately or to have his true feelings understood.
Theron’s face, which had been puffed up, became much more serious.
“Selene. It doesn’t matter if you go to study abroad. I can just wait. Just promise me you’ll come back.”
“…”
“I need at least that much hope to be able to breathe.”
However, even at this desperate request, a crappy question came back from Selene.
“Is it really enough for me to just come back? Even if I come back with another man?”
‘She’s not just hitting my chest with words, she’s digging it out.’
Theron’s mouth turned bitter at her words, and his throat bobbed.
However, it was not an assumption he had not imagined.
“You never know what will happen to people. Even if you meet someone where you’re studying abroad, you might break up one day because you can’t stand the sight of him breathing. I’ll be desperately hoping for that.”
“You mean you’ll curse me.”
“I’ve demolished a perfectly good building, so I think I can wish for that much.”
‘Would he just wish for them to break up?’
‘Not only would he curse that bastard to fall down somewhere every night, but he would also find out where he lived and keep watching to see if there was anything he could nitpick about.’
‘In fact, he was trying so hard not to think about it seriously, so this was just this much. He couldn’t imagine how he would act if he were actually in that situation.’
‘He might go crazy with jealousy and his blood might boil.’
‘He felt a similar feeling when he thought of Selene’s ex-fiancé, Logan Pembroke.’
‘So, I’ll only know when that situation comes.’
Selene, who was unaware of his dark thoughts, leisurely turned her gaze to the building that was being demolished.
“The loss must be huge. You said you received a lot of investment while building this building.”
“Even if the loss is big, it won’t go bankrupt, so don’t worry. And even if it does, I’m confident I can make money again somehow.”
This was true.
Making money was no longer a scary thing for Theron.
“If not, I can just beg. With a face and a glib tongue like this, wouldn’t I be able to collect all the coins in Cantora?”
Still, Theron tried to lighten the mood at the end.
The contradictory desire not to burden Selene even while committing this enormous act was, to some extent, true.
‘I want to change Selene’s mind, but I don’t want her to forgive me out of a sense of apology.’
There was a clear difference.
However, his worry that Selene might feel burdened seemed to be a completely useless one.
“You said you didn’t expect anything from me, right?”
Selene looked at him with the same cold gaze as when she had kicked him out of the ducal estate’s main gate.
“Then I’ll be on my way.”
At the sudden farewell, Theron’s fingers twitched.
‘Is it too shabby to hold on one more time after saying I don’t expect anything?’
And yet, Theron was calling out to Selene.
“…Wait.”
Fortunately, Selene stopped in her tracks and turned around.
“Why?”
“After talking with me today, is there not even a slight change in your feelings?”
‘This much is just asking, so it’s okay, right…’
Theron rationalized to himself and studied Selene.
But a cold wind was still blowing around Selene.
“Theron, I understand your wound well enough. I also understand a little why you did what you did. But it’s not that I can forgive you. The fact that the first man I opened my heart to approached me just for money doesn’t change.”
“…”
“It’s something that has already happened.”
Theron had nothing more to say.
Even if he proved that money meant nothing to him anymore by demolishing a nearly finished building, his mistake at the beginning of this relationship would not change.
It was a grim fact, but that didn’t mean he was going to give up.
Because there was still a sliver of hope.
Selene, who had been ignoring him as if he were invisible, was now at least looking him in the eye.
It meant she felt a little bit of pity for his situation.
Although he usually detested pity or compassion, Theron was just glad for that fact now that he was desperate for even a crumb.
“When are you going to study abroad?”
As Theron smoothly changed the subject, Selene paused for a moment.
Selene, who had been narrowing her pretty brow as if she had heard a very difficult question, answered belatedly.
“…Soon.”
“When soon?”
“Why do I have to tell you that?”
‘Is asking about her study abroad plans such a big deal that she has to answer so prickly?’
Theron thought Selene’s reaction was a little oversensitive.
After all the things they had talked about, to be so sensitive about just the timing of her study abroad.
“You can at least tell me that much. We won’t be able to see each other once you go to study abroad anyway.”
“You always demand an answer in that way.”
“Can you really not tell me?”
Selene stalled again this time.
“I’m thinking of going this summer or winter…”
“I thought it was decided since you said you were going soon, but you haven’t decided yet.”
“Whether it’s summer or winter, it can be called ‘soon’ until this year.”
Hearing it, it wasn’t wrong.
If both were within this year, summer could be called ‘early soon’ and winter could be called ‘late soon’.
Above all, if Selene’s study abroad period was ‘late’ soon, it would be a great thing for him.
It meant he would have more time to persuade Selene.
“Then how about going in the winter?”
At Theron’s brazen suggestion, Selene’s eyebrow twitched.
“That’s for me to decide.”
“Yes, yes. It’s for you to decide. But there’s something you don’t know. It’s terribly hard to travel by ship for several days in the summer. And it takes a week to get to the continent of Vetgraz, and the sea is in its rainy season around that time, so it rains every day, and the cabins get damp, so bugs often pop out.”
Theron mixed what he had heard with a suitable amount of exaggeration.
Although Selene would know that this was a ridiculous tantrum, if it could influence her to postpone her study abroad even a little, Theron was willing to do anything and everything.
“Catching bugs is also my specialty, but I can’t go with you, can I? And you shouldn’t use your pretty hands, Selene, to catch bugs. Of course, if you don’t like this and you don’t like that, there’s also the option of not going to study abroad at all…”
Nevertheless, seeing the gradually cooling Selene, Theron’s words gradually trailed off.
“…there’s also the option of not going.”
“Don’t hold on to me anymore, Theron Cox.”
At Theron’s nonsense, Selene finally turned her back firmly.
‘Ah…’
‘He wanted to hold onto Selene one last time, but a sense of crisis was warning Theron.’
‘If he held on again this time, a hand might fly towards his cheek.’
‘Although it was a shame, it seemed today’s meeting was over.’
Still, Theron was not as gloomy or suffocated as before.
Was it because Selene didn’t feel so cold after talking with her?
In particular, the last conversation they had had felt almost casual, and he had naturally blended into that situation.
So, Theron reviewed his next plan in his head.
It was to use the strategy from the beginning of their relationship again.
The method of approaching her as if by chance.
Although it was a bit old-fashioned, it was a classic.
He had to approach her like that and be seen often to develop some feelings.
But there were many things to do before that.
There was a mountain of work to be done to clean up and proceed in place of demolishing this building.
‘I guess I’ll have to stay up all night again today.’
Theron, who had been watching the car Selene was in disappear in the distance, also started to move to leave the noisy street.
Theron did not look back even once at the building that was collapsing beyond recognition.