Chapter 9: Unemployed, Jobless, Hikikomori

“Sul-yun-ah. It’s not that.”

“Not that?”

“I was drunk and confused the fridge with the closet! Hehe!”

“I see. Now, give me the bottle. You’re going to drop it and break it.”

I laughed, and Sul-yun was kind.

Sul-yun took the vodka bottle from me and headed to the living room fridge.

There’s a mini fridge in my room, but the fact that she walked all the way to the large fridge in the living room made my breath stop.

People can communicate not just with words but through actions as well.

‘Is the room in good shape?’

Luckily, the cup noodle bowls, the kimbap wrappers, and other things were all cleaned up.

It was such a relief since they were all piled up just until yesterday, right?

“Unni, you’re still living the way you used to.”

Oh, right. I had just thrown everything into the kitchen, not actually cleaned it up.

Sul-yun had gone to check the fridge.

When she came back, her gaze interrogated me.

Someone save me.

Delivery, cup noodles, convenience store kimbap, or triangle kimbap.

Since moving in, that’s all I’ve eaten.

Honestly, I’m not the type to cook.

Sul-yun probably knows that, but seeing it for herself is another matter.

“Sul-yun is sad. Why don’t you take care of your body?”

“Well, I… Hmm.”

Honestly, I have nothing to say, even if I get scolded.

Even if I had a hundred mouths, there’s nothing I could say.

When Sul-yun makes that sad face, it feels like my chest is being squeezed, and I feel guilty.

“I knew it, so I looked up a healthy lunch subscription service. They’ll start delivering tomorrow, so make sure to eat one meal a day.”

Before I knew it, Sul-yun had adapted and was skillfully managing me.

If someone told me she was my mom, I’d believe it.

I agree.

This wasn’t the relationship we had before.

When I was the older sibling and she was the younger one.

Pfft.

“Hiyaaa!?”

An unexpected surprise!

I let out a terrible scream as Sul-yun’s touch brushed my sensitive body.

No matter what, you can’t attack there!

“Unni, you’re not wearing a bra again?”

“Sul, Sul-yun-ah. Even though we’re sisters, there are boundaries!”

Please, protect my human dignity and shame.

“If you don’t respect the boundaries of a person, why should I respect the boundaries of being a sister?”

Don’t misunderstand!

I’m not rejecting femininity or bras.

I just don’t need one, that’s all.

What’s the point of that thing?

It’s a functional piece of equipment that supports the weight of the chest so it doesn’t sag.

But I don’t have much development in that area, so I don’t need it!

I don’t have enough weight to sag, so what’s the point of support?

It’s as pointless as saying you need to push your skin upwards against gravity to avoid sagging while washing your face!

“Are you thinking that you don’t need support because there’s no weight to sag?”

“Ugh.”

Sul-yun isn’t a psychic.

It’s just that I’ve said that several times before, so she’s learned the pattern.

“Then what about this? What’s this in my hand?”

“Ahh!”

I have to explain.

I’m definitely not rejecting femininity or bras.

I wear skirts just fine!

I just hate having to wear a restrictive undergarment for something I don’t even need!

Honestly, I’m not even at the level of a chubby boy.

It’s barely anything popping out.

Of course, I’m seriously underweight.

A-cup, B-cup, it’s mandatory in Korean society to wear a bra!

This society is wrong!

Let people who need it wear it and leave the rest alone!

“What if your chest starts to sag later? Sul-yun is sad!”

“Please stop the harassment…”

Sul-yun continued to massage my chest with a sad face.

I was always the one losing in our fights.

“I’ll wear it now, so stop…”

Criminal!

Life sentence!

Punished to live with restraints forever!

…Though I plan to escape again in a little while.

‘Sul-yun is really big, so this must be absolutely necessary…’

Sul-yun had grown.

Not just her chest, but also her height.

It wasn’t like that before.

I was quite tall, and my little sister was a kid.

It wasn’t just because I was older.

I was very healthy, but Sul-yun was weak, and since she hadn’t grown properly, she was much smaller than kids her age.

Sul-yun.

‘Yeah, this is definitely a blessing.’

I, who was once the legendary 181cm tall, somehow became the 155cm little legend.

And Sul-yun, who was only 160cm, became 175cm tall.

I, whose head was a little bigger, now had a head that was smaller.

Sometimes I complain about the height difference, but what does it matter?

It’s such a strange condition, isn’t it?

I think so too.

After catching this “illness,” Sul-yun became healthy.

It’s an ironic thing to say, right?

To say she became healthy after falling ill.

But it really was like that.

Her constitution completely changed.

Sul-yun no longer suffered from sickness like when she was younger.

So, this is definitely a blessing.

Even if my body can no longer go out into society, even if my mind has become that way,

it’s enough to see Sul-yun not suffering anymore.

“Thank you, unni. For helping me.”

Sul-yun said that and kissed me on the cheek.

It didn’t feel bad at all.

No, it felt good.

My little sister is the prettiest and cutest, right?

Isn’t that true?

[Unni, make sure to eat your lunch! Your loving Sul-yun♡]

When I woke up, a note was left by my bedside.

We had slept together, but she had left without me noticing.

She wasn’t being cruel; it was just that my life had gotten tangled up with my unemployed routine.

Is it already 1 PM?

Even though I slept at a normal hour, I overslept so deeply.

Sul-yun must have been busy with various things, so she couldn’t wait for me to wake up.

Yesterday, Sul-yun and I went grocery shopping and cooked together.

She was eager to teach me, but unfortunately, that energy didn’t get through.

It’s not that I don’t cook because I can’t, it’s because I find it bothersome.

I don’t have the personality to put that much effort into food.

I don’t really have a hobby for enjoying gourmet food.

I went downstairs to grab the lunchbox that had arrived in the delivery room.

Hmm, a strong scent of grass.

It was definitely different from the usual delivery food.

The taste was pretty good.

It was likely an expensive one since it seemed to focus on both health and flavor.

It was nice that they put in the effort, but the excessive packaging made it a bit of a downside.

It meant there was a lot of trash.

In Korea, there’s so much unnecessary over-packaging.

A strategy for luxury?

Try being the one to throw out the trash once.

“…Trash.”

I thought as I ate the lunchbox.

Can I live like this?

At twenty-two years old,

not attending school or working.

I’m not trying to joke about being on winter break.

I dropped out of college a long time ago.

A person who ran away from society.

A hikikomori.

Strictly speaking, I might even lose my hikikomori certificate, since I don’t stay locked in my room.

An unemployed person with no job or economic activity.

If you count that I have no will to get a job, I’m a person who’s given up on employment.

I am a recluse. Regrettably.

“You never even mentioned it. Sul-yun.”

What have you been doing?

What are you planning to do in the future?

The fact that my younger sister didn’t ask any of the obvious questions, ones anyone would naturally be curious about, is so painful.

Maybe she already figured it out just by seeing my life.

Due to some incident, I’ve become someone who can no longer function in society.

As you might guess, the reason my body has become like this child is because of that.

To be specific, it’s because there are too many cases of pedophilia in this world.

But I can’t be a jobless recluse forever.

It’s not a money issue.

By now, you’d understand, given the family situation.

I don’t think it would be a big problem if I never worked again until the day I die.

No. This trashy mindset.

Once you settle into complacency, that’s the end.

It doesn’t have to be a great job.

I just need to pretend I have a job, something that won’t make Sul-yun feel so sad, so I can at least make her think I’m trying.

First, I need to be able to work from home.

Because my body can’t work around others.

“Novelist? Manga artist? Musician?”

The first things that come to mind are creative jobs.

Even if I don’t achieve anything, I could just say, “I’m not a jobless bum, I’m an aspiring artist.”

…Now that I think about it, I could also just do nothing and say, “I’m still brainstorming, inspiration hasn’t struck yet.”

You don’t plan to work, do you, unni? But let’s not point it out.

I see Sul-yun giving up on me!

Sul-a, despair!

“Well, it would be nice to be good at something. Something I’m talented at.”

Of course, I think it would be better to have a job that’s at least a little successful.

What kind of job could that be?

A job that’s not too embarrassing to talk about, that allows remote work, and that fits my talents.

Well, I guess no such convenient job really exists.

After all, most people in the world live by forcing themselves to do work they don’t want to.

So there’s no such thing as a conscience-free, perfect job.

Even if such a job existed, it probably wouldn’t come my way.

The more I think about the future, the more my head hurts.

But then, I’d feel guilty throwing a vodka party alone.

Should I just play a game?

I know very well that game addiction is just as dangerous as alcohol addiction.

But doing the thing I’m good at helps relieve some of my stress.

Ah, of course, I could never be a pro gamer.

As I mentioned before, my body and mind have become incapable of functioning in society.

Living in a dorm and playing team games would never work.

It’s really a shame.

If I didn’t have this body, I feel like I could have been good at it.