You Can’t Fall in the Same Place Twice

After looking around the room and finding no clothes lying about, Ewan finally turned his attention to a wardrobe that had been knocked over in the earlier chaos.

“This isn’t theft, okay. I’m just borrowing one item. I’ll pay him back double—no, ten times the amount later.”

After repeating the mantra in his mind until he was convinced he wasn’t doing anything wrong, Ewan reached out to open the wardrobe.

“Hm? Why won’t it budge?”

Ewan looked at the wardrobe, a hint of confusion on his face. He followed the crack of the door down with his eyes and was instantly stunned.

“What the hell? So many locks?”

The room was dim, so he hadn’t noticed before. But now that his eyes had adjusted to the darkness, he saw that the dilapidated old wardrobe was secured with at least a dozen different locks.

“What is this thing? Is he keeping gold bars stolen from a bank in here or something?” Ewan stood up, annoyed. If someone had gone to the trouble of locking it up like this, it must contain something important. He couldn’t just go and pick the locks, could he? Although, it wouldn’t be that difficult for him.

“Forget it. I’ll think of something else. Wrapping myself in a bedsheet isn’t the worst option.”

Just as he was about to grab a sheet from the nearby bed, the corner of his eye caught something on the side of the wardrobe. It seemed the earlier impact had created a crack, and a corner of some dark piece of clothing was sticking out.

“So it’s just a wardrobe, after all.”

No matter how many locks you put on it, it was still just an ordinary wooden wardrobe. A thing you could smash open with a single punch. What kind of protection could it possibly offer? If the contents were that precious, why not get a safe?

“But…” Ewan rubbed his hands together with a small, gleeful smile. “You fell out on your own. You can’t blame me for this.”

With that, he grabbed the corner of the fabric and gave it a sharp pull…

And the smug grin on his face instantly froze.

“Is this… an underpant?”

Ewan looked at the familiar-looking pair of men’s briefs in his hand, his expression immediately turning to one of disgust. A beautiful woman’s panties were always exciting, but a man’s… was a little…

Thankfully, perhaps because he had pulled too hard, the underpant had dragged some of the other clothes in the wardrobe with it, and another dark corner was now showing. Ewan tossed the briefs aside, grabbed the new corner, and pulled again—

Another underpant?

Was his luck really this bad?

“I refuse to believe it!”

His temper flared. He threw caution to the wind and shoved his hand into the crack in the wardrobe.

…

A few minutes later…

Ewan stared at the small mountain of men’s underpants piled before him, lost in a profound, soul-deep existential crisis.

Could a single person… really own this many pairs of underpants? Not even a veteran with extreme OCD who changed their underwear ten times a day would have a collection this terrifying.

“No, wait…”

It dawned on him. It wasn’t just the sheer quantity. Looking closely, the styles of the underpants were all completely different. Just as a person can’t date two women at the same time, a person can’t wear two different sizes of underpants.

Which meant…

A bolt of lightning shot through his brain. Ewan suddenly remembered what Celicia had said to him.

“The boys’ dormitory… the underwear thief… the pervert?”

…

In an instant, a chill shot up from the soles of his feet to the top of his head. A terrifying, malicious presence, like a venomous snake, coiled in his mind, its forked tongue flickering.

His neck creaked as he stiffly turned his head.

The door to the room had opened at some point. A tall, large figure stood in the shadows, silently watching him. On his honest, simple-looking face was a look of pure, unadulterated disbelief.

He seemed just as stunned by the scene as Ewan was.

Like an honest, hardworking husband coming home late from work, only to hear a strange sound coming from his wife’s bedroom.

After a moment, a low, deep voice, laced with a mixture of confusion and barely suppressed rage, broke the suffocating silence.

“Ewan Campbell?”

…

“Haha, what a coincidence.”

Ewan looked at Ryan and forced a friendly smile.

“Are you visiting someone too, Ryan?”

“This is my dorm room.”

“…”

Ewan’s smile instantly froze. I know it’s your dorm room, buddy! I was just trying to be polite! Can’t we both just pretend we didn’t see anything and move on from this awkward situation? We’re classmates! Why do you have to make things so tense?

But Ryan clearly didn’t get the hint. He just silently drew his massive horse-chopping saber.

“I didn’t expect you to find out. Since you have, then I have no choice.”

Like an honest man who, after a brief period of anger, disbelief, and hysteria, has finally accepted the reality of the situation and has chosen to let go and allow his beloved wife to be happy, Ryan’s expression was now calm.

“Return to the embrace of the God of Love here and now, Ewan Campbell,” he said, his face a mask of cold determination.

“Is… that so.”

Ewan also stood up, a look of sudden realization on his face. Looking at the pile of underpants on the floor, and thinking about what had happened before, he finally understood what that “Pure Boys’ Mutual Aid Society” was all about. He finally understood why a group of men had been corrupted by the God of Love.

Only those with such… unconventional love in their hearts could be corrupted by the God of Love.

So it was a cult of gay men.

No wonder.

Thinking of this, Ewan couldn’t help but look at Ryan with a sense of pity. “Do you have any idea what kind of path you’ve chosen, Ryan?”

“What kind of path? The path of pursuing love, of course.”

Ryan ripped off his clothes, revealing his powerful muscles and… the signature thong of the True Love Cult.

“The great God of Love has taught me what love is. I will naturally follow Him forever.”

“So, as a heretic who has blasphemed against the god, you must die here today, Ewan Campbell!”

“Is that so? Your devotion to your faith is truly touching. But do you think you can actually do it, Ryan?” Ewan slowly raised the small dagger in his hand and smiled. “I won the last time we fought in class, you know.”

“That was only because I was careless and fell for your little trick.” Ryan glanced at the fruit knife in Ewan’s hand, which seemed to show a complete lack of respect for him, and a vein on his forehead twitched. But he quickly suppressed his anger.

A man cannot fall in the same place twice. After being provoked into a rage and defeated by Ewan’s words last time, he had spent a whole night meditating to control his emotions. This time, he would absolutely not be blinded by anger!

“It seems the old tricks won’t work.” Ewan sighed and gave a bitter smile. “Without being able to use those little tricks, I’m probably no match for you. So, before I die, could you answer a few of my questions, Ryan?”

“What?”

“It’s nothing, really. I’m just a little curious. Since you’re gay, Ryan, why were you so provoked by my words in class before?” Ewan craned his neck like a curious child and asked in an exaggerated tone, “Don’t tell me… you only chose to become gay as a second-best option because you couldn’t get a girlfriend, did you, Ryan?”

“You bastard!”

Hearing this, Ryan’s eyes instantly turned red again.